Questions of Peace, Secrets, Conduct, Hell, and Truth

 

“We are each our own devil, 

and we make this world our hell.”

-- Oscar Wilde

 Can you tell me something true?

I woke up this morning. I am still exceedingly happy in life. Everything I know about me is true.

Are you a hypocritical person?

I am a self-proclaimed hypocrite. Don’t do as I do, do as I say. What I do isn’t good for anyone, including me. However, it is a sad fact that the people who can pave your road to heaven are the ones who will be doing some time in hell. They make the mistakes and you glean the wisdom.

Does it feel better to copulate when you're rich or you're poor?

If you’re in love it really doesn’t matter.

I'm going to kill myself one day because of my grandparents. They keep accusing me of something, and I'm tired of it. I'm gonna commit suicide right in front of them. What should I do?

Yeah, that’ll teach them, right? Too bad you won’t be around to enjoy it. I had considered this when my wife divorced me, and I asked myself why someone who doesn’t love me, at all, would ever care? Well, she wouldn’t. My children would suffer, as would my parents and my friends, but not her. Suicide would accomplish nothing, and I’d probably end up right back here working on the same issues.  My personal hell on earth.

What you should do is leave as soon as you are able. If you’re too young, there are state agencies that might be able to help. Suicide is not painless, and it is forever. No children, no mad sex, no love, you get nothing from it, and that is pretty much the point of it. Nothingness. Think about that, while you still can. Now, make a better decision.

Do people tend to value themselves less after they get cheated on?

It says more about the one who cheated than about the one who was cheated on. They have corrupted love, loyalty, honesty, communication, integrity, basically any moral ethics they may have had. Who, from this point on, would be foolish enough to trust them?

“When people cheat in any arena, they diminish themselves-they threaten their own self-esteem and their relationships with others by undermining the trust they have in their ability to succeed and in their ability to be true.”

-- Cheryl Hughes

I’m 22 and my parents told me I’m rude for not taking advice from my sister who’s four years younger than me. They told me it’s equivalent to my boss not listening to me because of my age. Do you think it’s true?

It may be rude not to listen to the opinion of your 18-year-old sister. You may learn something you didn’t think of. However, taking her advice would depend on how well versed in the problem she is.

In the Intelligence field, I always deferred to those younger troops that had more knowledge of certain weapon systems to confirm my opinion. It didn’t matter how wide the age difference, it was just the “smart” thing to do.

What if I told you I have a sincerely held religious belief that LGBT goes to hell?

So, the “sincerely held religious belief” against judging others doesn’t bother your delicate sensibilities? Alrighty, then.

Why do most religions have rules that limit human freedom?

Organized religion is about control, regardless of what they claim. They are, essentially, legal, recognized, cults. I am ordained as an “interfaith” minister, which means I really don’t care what you claim to be, I am here for you. I abhor organized religion. I prefer a personal relationship with my God, without a “church” the ceremonies that go with it. 

What is the feeling of being lucky like?

Have you ever knowingly believed in bullshit? That’s what that feeling is like. Casinos don’t exist because they lose big. They exist because so few people win big. It isn’t luck that makes them rich, it’s the odds. The house will always win more than it loses.

Why are most highly educated people not successful in their marriages?

Expanding on a previous answer, I think you see those who spent way too much time on academics and not so much on interpersonal relationships. Let’s face it, love tends to rattle the brain. Once they get into a career, they, again, are so focused on their profession that they forget to have a life.

I used to ask the owner of a corporation I worked for, why she didn’t take time to travel or take vacations. She always answered that she had her dog and her gardening. Woo-hoo… Unfortunately, she died alone.

Reader's comment: Why would dying alone be unfortunate? It sounds fortunate to me since it means you don't leave behind a grieving spouse.

My reply: I wish for you the "fortune" you seek.

“It’s probably not just by chance that I’m alone. It would be very hard for a man to live with me, unless he’s terribly strong. And if he’s stronger than I, I’m the one who can’t live with him. … I’m neither smart nor stupid, but I don’t think I’m a run-of-the-mill person. I’ve been in business without being a businesswoman, I’ve loved without being a woman made only for love. The two men I’ve loved, I think, will remember me, on earth or in heaven, because men always remember a woman who caused them concern and uneasiness. I’ve done my best, in regard to people and to life, without precepts, but with a taste for justice.”

-- Coco Chanel

I want to end my life and my dreams because I'm tired, but I love God and I don't want to see my parents broken and crying all night because of me. What should I do?

If you’re tired, find a way to take a break and get some rest. The one thing you never want to do is anything stupid.

Would you have been able to go as far in your career without a supportive spouse?

Farther. My “spouse” wasn’t that supportive.

I said "God bless you" to my veterinarian who turned out to be a firm atheist. He got really angry, kicked my cat, and told me to get out and never return. How should I handle this situation?

He kicked your cat? A “veterinarian” kicked a helpless animal? I’m surprised he didn’t have to call 911 to have his head removed from his ass. Kicking a helpless animal is one step away from kicking a helpless human. I’m not sure I would have shown as much restraint as you. I’m sure there must be some veterinarian association you can report him to, or, at the very least, the ASPCA.

Do you agree with the following statement: “sex is not about pleasure. It’s about entering into a relationship with another human being”?

No. Sex is all about pleasure. It is taking the existing relationship with another human being to another level you both agree upon.

Would we know the truth if nobody told a lie?

No. We know light because of dark, good, because of evil, sweet because of sour, and lies because of truth. There must be balance in the universe or we would know so very little. 

“My point is, life is about balance. The good and the bad. The highs and the lows. The pina and the colada.”

-- Ellen DeGeneres

What will happen if I like a married woman?

That would depend on how violent her husband is.

What advice would you give a 21-year-old (me) that doesn't feel like she's doing enough or doing the right things in general?

If you’re not doing enough, do more. If you aren’t doing the right things, do more of them. This isn’t hard. Make a list and start working on it.

Have you ever met a nice rich person? What made them so nice?

They don’t wear their money on their sleeve. I had drinks with a man in Manzanillo, Mexico. He kept buying drinks and I insisted to buy the next round. He laughed and said he can afford it. Turned out he was filthy rich, but one would have never known it by talking to him. He simply appreciated the company and “one of the boys” conversation. Salt of the earth and so not boasting about his wealth.

What will you do if someone slaps your wife in public?

He’ll be lucky to survive the encounter. If it’s a woman, she’s on her own.

Is it true or false that flexible expenses stay about the same each month?

False. Fixed expenses stay the same each month, variable expenses vary or flex. Variable expenses may stay the same or they may flex higher or lower.

"What is a fixed expense? In simple terms, it’s one that typically doesn’t change month-to-month. And, if you’re wondering what is a variable expense, it’s an expense that may be higher or lower from one month to the next."

-- Rebecca Lake, Daphne Foreman

What is the meaning of the quote "if a secret is not worth sharing, it's not worth keeping"?

It is so very true. Most secrets are so much worth sharing, and this is exactly why they are secret. The Russians and the Chinese think all of our targeting information is worth sharing, which is why we go to great lengths to make it all Top Secret. A secret is any information that only those with a need to know are privileged to know. We determine the Russians and Chinese don’t need to know what targets we plan on lighting up.

What does it mean when someone says “Tit for Tat”?

This for that.

How do I quit my job without my spouse knowing?

A marriage is supposed to be a partnership. Your idea of a partnership is keeping secrets from your partner. This will, ultimately, come back to bite you in the ass, and deservedly so. Let’s say the partnership might be without half of the income, and one partner isn’t aware of it while researching plans to expand. They tell you about the plans and you go all sheepish because the money isn’t there. They don’t understand your attitude because they think you both have jobs. But, oh no, you have a secret. A stupid little secret, from your partner in life. Not real smart.

Why does anything exist?

There must be balance. Nature abhors a vacuum. so there must be the opposite of a vacuum to have balance.

What do you find peaceful and kind?

A mountain stream.

“Out beyond ideas of wrongdoing and rightdoing there is a field. I'll meet you there. 

When the soul lies down in that grass the world is too full to talk about.”

-- Rumi

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as a chaplain at the regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com