Questioning Thought, Love, Choice, and Life

 

"Some kids get called 'bundles of joy' or 'slices of heaven' or 'dreams come true.' We got 'the fifty-fourth generation of DNA experiments.' Doesn't have the same warm and fuzzy feel. But maybe I'm oversensitive."

-- James Patterson

What disadvantages are there to “thinking aloud”?

Are you working on a “top secret” government project?

I like to be nice to people because someone telling me I’m a good person makes me feel good. I do things for people because being appreciated makes me feel important. I don’t want material things, just gratitude. Am I selfish?

So, if you were nice to people but they didn’t make you feel important, you wouldn’t continue to do things for people? Selflessness is about doing good things because it’s the right thing to do, not because you’ll get a “warm fuzzy” from those you do it for. The “warm fuzzy” comes from within you for being a good person, regardless of what they think.

What is the difference between selfishness and self-love? Or is there no difference?

One of the reasons I love myself is my selflessness, so, yes, there is a difference. You can also love the fact that you give nothing to charity, or only if you’ll get something in return.

When did you realize that you needed to unlearn things that you have been told for most of your life?

1973. I became an Air Force “Combat Intelligence Specialist” and learned not to believe anything the news media puked out or most of what I was taught in the California school system. I had to teach myself American history and political science all over again.

What does it mean if someone says "this coffee is worse than Stalin!"?

Doing time in a gulag would be preferable to drinking the sad excuse for coffee.

What is a passport to a rewarding life?

True happiness! True happiness is a passport to just about everything. If you are filthy rich, how rewarding would it be if you are not happy in your wealth? I think I would be constantly happy knowing I have friends whether I am poor or not. Just having friends and family that care makes one wealthy beyond their wildest dreams. Understanding this, however, is difficult for many to grasp.

“Each time a person passes by you and you say 'hello', imagine that person turning into a candle. The more positivity, love, and light you reflect, the more light is mirrored your way. Sharing beautiful hellos is the quickest way to earn spiritual brownie points. You should start seeing hellos as small declarations of faith. Every time you say hello to a stranger, your heart acknowledges over and over again that we are all family.”

-- Suzy Kassem

What exactly does this imply: "have a life together and a life apart, when you are in a relationship"?

We have mutual friends and friends apart. We have our own hobbies and interests, and we have some mutual ones, as well. If you morph your “relationship” into a life of “one,” it really doesn’t fill the definition of a relationship. Why not just stay single and live in sin?

I equate this to not bringing your work home. You have to enjoy some time away from the office in the same way you need to enjoy some “me time” apart from those you are close to. There must be some balance.

Will my wishes come true from the real wishes website?

Wishes come true more often when you work to make them a reality.

What influence do you think the past has over the present?

If we don’t learn the lessons of the past we are doomed to repeat the mistakes. Vladimir Putin has ignored the lessons of the Nazi invasions and is repeating the mistake the Nazis made that cost Russia 27,000,000 souls. While he was acting the Nazi he dared to call Ukrainian President Volodymyr Zelenskyy a Nazi. Zelinskyy is a Jew.  Putin pushes us toward World War III because he refuses to learn.

What are some ways to achieve success in just about anything?

You achieve “success” by making the conscious choice to be truly happy always and in all things. However, you attain your goals, in just about everything, through study, and hard work.

Why don't smart people become rich?

My dad was not the most intelligent man, but he was smart enough to understand the value of hard work, staying out of debt, investing his money wisely, and, eventually, becoming monetarily wealthy. You don’t have to be intelligent to become rich, you just have to be smart enough to understand the value of hard work so you can be prepared to jump when the right opportunities present themselves.

“I think everybody should get rich and famous and do everything they ever dreamed of so they can see that it's not the answer.”

-- Jim Carrey

Isn’t loving a weakness?

Thank God, yes! No, wait… I’m thinking of lust. Love takes a stout heart and a strong will to persevere, no matter what happens. I fall into lust every day, but you only fall in real love once or twice. I thought I was in love when I married my ex-wife, but I was just young and stupid. Now, I try not to make that mistake ever again. So far, living in sin has worked out for me.

What is more important for you: honor or life?

Life. Honor is great, but if you’re dead it’s hard to be honorable. You really have to live in order to exercise it.

Which one is more appropriate, to do what you love or love what you are doing?

I’ve had great happiness in loving what I do. I’ve been very lucky to always love what I’ve chosen to do. I think if I’d done what I love, it would quickly get old. Loving what I do, however, always brought mystery into my day and kept me on my toes.

How do you know that you are not the first priority?

When I see that someone else is. This happens to me all the time, so it’s a good thing I’m so humble. Being retired helps a lot, I have all the time in the world to exercise the patience I’m still working on.

Why are people who say they have no choice always the ones who have a choice?

I don’t think there’s such a thing as having no choice. You always have a choice. The only time you feel you don’t is when you give up your right to make a choice, but that is still your choice. If I was a Jew in Auschwitz, I would have chosen to charge at the guards than march to the showers.

“​One could have mistakenly assumed that each train could choose its own destination. But there was no choice. The Nazi operator sat in the station booth, his hands on levers and switches, forcing each train along its given path.”

-- Danny M. Cohen

What ultimately determines winners and losers?

Hard work, determination, and perseverance, to attain their goals.

Someone asked me, when outside, how my day was going. I answered that it was going smooth but I didn't know where to. Inside, however, I am a legend. How is your day going?

I’m only a legend to those who are perpetually offended by me. There are a lot of people who think they’re offended by me.

My day is always going well. I have made the choice to be truly happy always and in all things, even in ignoring those who think I offend them, the League of the Perpetually Offended. It is what it is until it isn’t, however, so I simply continue to strive for happiness. 

What are some real-world examples of "easier said than done," being 100% true? What are some real-world examples of "easier said than done" being false?

Building the “Great Pyramid” of Giza, and waking up.

“You are allowed to get up one day and decide to change who you are. We don’t have to stay the way people see us out of fear that they won’t like the person we want to be” do you agree?

Yes! Always be who you want to be, it is your life, not theirs. This is why I don’t get angry with the League of the Perpetually Offended. To what end? They’ll always be offended, so it's simply better to ignore them and let them be what they want to be, as counterproductive as I feel that is.

Change is the only true constant in the universe. Every morning I begin another day of change. I learn and I grow and, by day's end, I am more than I was.

Can lies help you get what you want in life?

Yes, but you sacrifice your integrity and your personal code of moral ethics, if you ever had them to begin with. In a short while, you won’t be able to tell lies from the truth, and people would have already determined you’re pretty much full of shit, anyway.

“Above all, don't lie to yourself. The man who lies to himself and listens to his own lie comes to a point that he cannot distinguish the truth within him, or around him, and so loses all respect for himself and for others. And having no respect he ceases to love.”

-- Fyodor Dostoevsky

Do 45-year-olds realize that they are old?

Not a chance. When I was 45 I was invincible. Approaching 70, I feel like I’m 55, until I get up in the morning and have to work the “misspent youth” out of my bones. God forbid a storm rolls in and the barometer drops. Ouch!

 How many "thank yous" should you write and say to express how thankful you are?

One, unless, of course, you want to be known as a “kiss ass” to those around you.

What is the relation of failure to a person's perception of himself?

That would depend on whether the person feels that failure is the end-all to life. Failure should only affect a person’s perception of self if they let the failure stand as a monument to who they are. Failure, for all the negativity we throw onto it, is simply another opportunity to learn, and it is actually the best way that we learn. You can either learn from the failure or fail a second time when you fail to learn anything from it.

Just because we can do a thing, does it mean we should do it?

Absolutely not. Integrity would demand we look to our ethical and moral code of conduct to decide our course of action. Do we kill an unarmed enemy combatant? Nazis and Vladimir Putin might say yes, but the Humanitarian Law of Armed Conflicts comes into play for those of us with a good sense of right and wrong.

What is your question of the day?

The same questions I wrestle with every day, “Why?” and “Why not?”

“There is much asked and only so much I think I can or should answer, and so, in this post, I would like to give a few thoughts on what seemed to be the overwhelming question: “WHY?”And here is the best answer I can give: Because. 

Because sometimes, life is damned unfair. 

Because sometimes, we lose people we love and it hurts deeply. 

Because sometimes, as the writer, you have to put your characters in harm’s way and be willing to go there if it is the right thing for your book, even if it grieves you to do it. 

Because sometimes there aren’t really answers to our questions except for what we discover, the meaning we assign them over time. 

Because acceptance is yet another of life’s “here’s a side of hurt” lessons and it is never truly acceptance unless it has cost us something to arrive there. 

Why, you ask? Because, I answer.

Inadequate yet true.”

-- Libba Bray

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as a chaplain at the regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com