Questioning Want, Integrity, Work, and Flirting

 

“Flirting is a woman’s trade, one must keep in practice.”

-- Charlotte Brontë

What’s the best way to handle dating with debt?

Get out of debt.

How do you flirt with somebody when you're not sure if they're above the age of consent?

Don’t, and go find out their age.

How old were you when you figured out your purpose in life? Has it changed over time?

I “figured it out” multiple times. After my final retirement, I was old enough to realize my ultimate purpose was to be happy always and mentor those who seek my advice. I do not expect it to change again, but, who knows? Life is funny in that change is the only true constant.

“The purpose of life is to live it, to taste experience to the utmost, to reach out eagerly and without fear for newer and richer experience.”

-- Eleanor Roosevelt

What is the best way for teenage boys to improve their mental health after a breakup?

Understand there are more fish in the sea, and probably better.

How do I stop wanting to be something? Can I never be and love myself? What I mean is, how can I stop wishing I was a different ethnicity…?

Have you looked at the history of your “ethnic” background? Everyone has something to be proud of in their ethnicity. Find out what it is and be proud of who you are. But, regardless of what you find, strive to be happy always and in all things. No one really cares what you are, we care much about who and why you are. Have faith and hope, and love yourself, for you have been placed here for a purpose, and that purpose should be occupying your time, not this.

Why do humans choose not to do better in all ways, big or small?

You really have to hang around better humans.

“What you choose also chooses you.”

-- Kamand Kojouri

If I don't drink alcohol by choice, am I considered lame or boring? I am trying to find fun things to do without having to drink alcohol.

Hang out with a more “mature” crowd who won’t judge you. My crowd… and we are all ages, could care less if you drink or not, as long as you give good conversation.

Why is this sleazy leftwing platform afraid of the truth?

Ah! A kindred spirit.

I think my girlfriend is falling out of love with me. I’ve talked to her but she tells me she just doesn’t know what she’s feeling. What can I do?

Well, it’s time for you to figure out what you’re feeling. This is one of those hints guys tend not to recognize. Tell her, you have reservations about your feeling as well, and go find someone prettier, more intelligent, and not as wishy-washy. That’ll just chap her ass.

“...unrequited love does not die; it's only beaten down to a secret place where it hides, curled and wounded. For some unfortunates, it turns bitter and mean, and those who come after pay the price for the hurt done by the one who came before.”

-- Elle Newmark

Do you think having integrity is important in society nowadays?

It’s never been that important to most of society, even though it is the right thing to practice. One only has to look at journalism, the news media, and politics to see how low the bar is. Having good integrity should be part of your personal code of moral ethics. Your code of ethics defines you, as will your integrity. 

Is integrity worth a human being's life?

That depends on how serious the person is about their integrity. Can they be bought? How much is their moral code of ethics worth, knowing everyone else will know they can never be trusted again? They would probably die before surrendering their integrity, which is a good thing because integrity allows you to protect yourself if your life is in imminent danger.

My boyfriend introduced me to his parents and his dad welcomed me to the family, but then when he and I were alone, he told me I would never be a part of his family, and that I should leave his son alone. What should I do?

Tell the boyfriend and let him deal with it.

“I'm someone who doesn't have anything to lose.”

-- Ally Carter

 Since old people complain that kids don’t get disciplined enough and are rude (because you can’t hit your kids anymore) should we be able to beat up old people to discipline them when they are rude then?

No, because old people are turning back into children, again, the children they’ve been subjected to most recently. Wait till you hug them and they take a crap.

If you divorce, is it a sin to marry another lady?

If you divorce, you’re already neck-deep in it. What’s the problem with living in a little more sin? I say, go for it, but just don’t make a habit of it. There are many temperatures to an oven.

Why do we put so much time and effort into failed relationships?

I put 25 years into a failed relationship. I was the only one who thought there was a chance of salvage. All of our mutual friends thought I was naive, and they were right. She finally admitted to me what all our friends already knew, she never loved me, she just used me to escape her family and then stayed on for half of my retirement. Yep. I was a dumb ass.

“You have certain ideas about what should happen... expectations. And if life is not moving that way, something is wrong. Nothing is going wrong! Life is going on its own, on!y you have some fixed ideas. So drop those fixed ideas. Life is never going to follow you... you have to follow life. So if it is muddled, be muddled. What can you do?”

-- Osho

What if I love to do everything by myself and all my relatives leave me for being that way? Can a person live a better life without relatives?

Being family is a give-and-take proposition. They’d like to be with you, and you’d rather do things by yourself. You want to have relatives, to take, but you’re not willing to be with them, to give. You’re the only one who can answer if you’ll be able to live a better life alone. There is a balance to “life” you seem willing to ignore. While you consider being a loner, also consider that there must always be balance.

Is giving a mirror as a gift bad luck?

Only if they’re seriously homely. They might view the gift as a personal affront. Your bad luck might be extricating the mirror from a bodily orifice.

How do you make yourself happy with whatever you have?

It is a choice each of us must make for ourselves. I have made the conscious choice to strive for happiness always and in all things, regardless of my circumstances. I view the alternative as unacceptable. It simply sucks. You can’t “make yourself happy” with whatever you have, You have to choose to be happy always. We view negativity in life as bad or some failure, yet, failure is simply another opportunity to learn. Stop bemoaning life and start learning from it. This is the best way to do this is to recognize everything as an opportunity to learn and excel.

"Be happy with nothing and you will be happy with everything"

-- Unknown

What are some tips to become more mature in terms of personality?

Act responsibly and be the voice of reason. This may not be popular, but it may save your life or the lives of friends.

Don’t feel as if you always have to comment in order to fit in. Sometimes listening is the best communication practice. Comment when it has meaning and substance.

Dress and groom well. Who you are in private is who people think you are in public and, more importantly, in business or on the job.

How do find perfection in work?

Nothing is perfect, so stop looking.  You can only strive for excellence.

How do I enjoy the little time that a person has?

Live life to the fullest! If you’re behind the mind-numbing computer, get out and take a walk in nature, or around town. Meet new people, and make new friendships. Fill your time with interesting things, people, and activities. It might help to adopt the philosophy that this life is not the end, You will have plenty of time to live your lives.

“Life is either a daring adventure or nothing at all.”

-- Helen Keller

Is it okay to enjoy PC and Android games at 40?

At 40 you should be developing life in reality, with real people. How about a real card game with real friends around a real table with real cards and real beer? Do you see the trend here? Reality! It’s a concept we should all adopt.

Is it generally good to be a quick decision maker?

Only when time is of the essence, but, even then, you risk failure by not having the time to completely think things through. Given the choice, taking a moment to consider all the variables will help to ensure a better outcome.

Do you see the intrinsic value that God has placed on your life?

God “gifted” me the incalculably valuable opportunity of a “life” to live. What I do with this life adds value to what God has already gifted me, at birth. Life is full of lessons to be learned, hardships to be handled, and misery to overcome. This prepares us all for the next life. If I do nothing in this life, I have wasted the opportunity that was gifted to me.

“Life is fundamentally a mental state. We live in a dream world that we create. Whose life is truer, the rational man of action pursuing practical goals of personal happiness and wealth or the philosophic man who lives in a world of theoretical and metaphysical ideas? We ascribe the value quotient to our lives by making decisions that we score as either valid or invalid based upon our personal ethics and how we think and behave.”

-- Kilroy J. Oldster

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as a chaplain at the regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com