Questioning Truth, Flaws, Control, and Morality

"I'll make sure you're having a good time, and that you're okay with everything. I just won't be well mannered about it.”

-- Samantha Young

What does it mean to not rush truth?

Many learned people will deliver their version of “truth” only to find, down the road, it’s not so much. I don’t rush truth until I understand whose truth I’m delivering and, even then, I cover my ass by stating it is the truth as we understand it at this moment. In the end, the truth will win out. Sometimes it is best to wait.

Author's comment: Smart. If only… 

Is It wrong to think a relationship can break you so a relationship can heal you?

No. My marriage broke me, spiritually and monetarily. Yet, with the help of a couple of good relationships, I was healed, happier than ever, and have never looked back.

What changes in your life can you make to save a lot of money?

Get out of debt.

Would you say that money will solve all your problems?

No. Money will assist in life, but money cannot buy true happiness. The biggest problem people have is their lack of true, sustainable, happiness. Being happy always and in all things, is true sustainable happiness.

What is the most memorable thing you have seen or felt when looking into the eyes of someone?

I’m always amazed and tickled when I look into the eye of a small child. Their eyes are happy and full of the wonder around them. We went to our local aquarium and I loved watching the young children as they pressed their faces against the large glass to the main tank, laughing as the fish came up for their own look. I call these children “little bits” of us. We should take note of their sense of wonder more often. I think we lose it as we get older. 

“Nothing compares to becoming aware of the massive face of the universe hidden in a newborn’s stare.”

-- Curtis Tyrone Jones

How can you find something useful in criticism?

Only if the criticism is constructive, otherwise it’s just another opinion. Opinions are like assholes - we all have one and they usually stink.

What is the biggest shock your wife gave you?

After 25 years of marriage and two children: “I never loved you. I used you as a way to escape my situation.”

All of our friends knew who she was, but me. I was the consummate idiot. She took half of my military retirement, the house, the car, child support, and I never looked back. I’ve been truly happy for the past 21 years.

What is the brutal truth about a third marriage?

Failure is an opportunity to learn. You have failed twice already. What makes you think the third time is a charm?

If most people believe cheating on a spouse is a character flaw, do they also believe the cheating spouse is naturally dishonest and of overall bad character?

I do, but, then, I’m a self-proclaimed hypocrite. In my humble opinion, if you cheat, at anything, you are dishonest. If you do it all the time, you are, most probably, naturally dishonest. Being dishonest is a sign that one does not stand by a set of good moral ethics, and having no ethics is a sign of an overall bad character.

What does one do to seek the truth?

Ignore anything but the truth.

“We should not be ashamed to acknowledge truth from whatever source it comes to us, even if it is brought to us by former generations and foreign people. For him who seeks the truth there is nothing if higher value than truth itself”

-- Albert Hourani

How is your mind different from your brain?

What? Oh, I get it. Duh... I'm a bit slow at times. The brain is the “container” holding the mind.

Have you ever been in bed next to your partner and then started talking to them and they were able to answer you even though they were completely asleep and had no memory of the conversation?

No, but I had a roommate in the Air Force that did this. He worked the Command Post and I worked Intelligence. Needless to say, he had to change jobs after I had a running conversation with him, one evening, about a classified operation coming up. He was asleep and rambling answers to my questions.  He remembered nothing about giving me the information I knew nothing about. You can’t talk in your sleep and hold onto a “Top Secret” clearance. 

What's the most difficult decision you made for love?

Not to be with them. There was an age difference that I could not overlook for their happiness. (See the next question.)

Why didn’t you end up being with the love of your life?

She was so much younger than I was. She deserved someone she could enjoy for an entire life. I will meet her again in the next life, and hopefully a little closer in age.

What will you do when you want to commit suicide?

I will remember that it accomplishes nothing for me, not in the long run, and I’ll probably just end up right back here, reliving the "lesson" I didn’t learn. My own “personal hell on earth.”

“There comes a time when you look into the mirror and you realize that what you see is all that you will ever be. And then you accept it. Or you kill yourself. Or you stop looking in mirrors.”

-- J. Michael Straczynski

What is your moral obligation at this stage in your life?

Taking care of my 88-year-old mother. She took care of me for 20 years, I can certainly return the favor.

Is revenge cheating a bad idea?

Just leave them, and skip the bad karma.

Is religion just a form of control?

I see it like this: Organized religion is a form of control. Your personal spiritual belief is your “religion,” but it is, actually, a form of control you exert over yourself in order to maintain your personal faith.

What are the important things in life?

Truly sustainable happiness.

What are some things you would never want to do?

I could list them, but it is just easier to say anything that could cause me to lose my life, like free-climbing, base jumping, skydiving, etc., etc.

“I think the world divides neatly into those who are excited by the managed induction of terror and those who are not. I do not find terror exciting. I find it terrifying. One of my basic goals is to subject my nervous system to as little total terror as possible. The cruel paradox of course is that this kind of makeup usually goes hand in hand with a delicate nervous system that's extremely easy to terrify.”

-- David Foster Wallace

Are males easy to control with the act of sex?

We are so much like dogs it is uncanny. Women are more like cats. Go figure.

Why should you care for and help others if reality is an illusion?

Shove a large sterile needle through the middle of your hand. Remind yourself that reality is simply an illusion, so this won’t hurt a bit. After you pick yourself up off the floor from writhing in agony, ask this question again.

What are 3 morals that you should have?

Honesty, loyalty, and kindness.

How do I ask "are you gay" without sounding rude?

“Can I ask you a personal question, just to clarify the “field of battle,” so to speak? You wouldn’t, by chance, be gay, would you?”

Is it really that religion is the source of human morality?

No. Doing the right thing can be accomplished without religion.

“Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one.”

-- Marcus Aurelius

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as a chaplain at the regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com