Questioning Failure, Courage, and Redemption

 

“Many of the younger generation know my name in a vague way and connect it with grotesque inventions, but don't believe that I ever existed as a person. They think I am a nonperson, just a name that signifies a tangled web of pipes or wires or strings that suggest machinery. My name to them is like a spiral staircase, veal cutlets, barber's itch—terms that give you an immediate picture of what they mean.”

-- Rube Goldberg

What does it mean when someone flashes their lights at you twice?

Your “high beams” are on, or you’re coming up on a cop. If it’s daytime, I’d go with the cop.

What can I do to become a successful being?

Make the conscious choice to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances. Once you can choose success in your life, then you can confidently move forward in attaining your other goals, like finding out that failure and mistakes are simply opportunities to learn. But, be successful, first, and you will learn with positivity so you can attain your goals.

Is honesty an attitude?

Other than being the basis of good moral ethics, yes. It helps to define who and why we are to those around us.

What are the strengths of structuralism?

As with any structure, a good foundation. Just saying. But, what do I know?

Whatever I do ends in a mess, and I have to take all the criticism before cleaning it. I work in Computer sciences.

So, people in computer science don’t make mistakes? This means they criticize you because they are gods. Bullshit. Nobody is that perfect. You are learning, just like they are, or did. These are the people who can't figure out why a system isn't working, while you're standing there holding the plug. Maybe the career you’ve chosen isn’t the one for you. But, before you chuck it all away, I’d ask someone in the field, one who has your respect, for some advice.

“Wisdom comes from making mistakes, having the courage to face them, and make adjustments moving forward based upon the knowledge acquired through those experiences.”

-- Ken Poirot

Historically, when did the major virtues (love, gratitude, patience, forgiveness, integrity, trust, loyalty, bravery, kindness, etc.) make a sustained appearance since 4000 BC by at least one individual (or even as a collective group of people)?

You’ve got to be effing kidding me.

What is a harbinger of failure?

“That wasn’t the target?” “Oh, shit!” “Oops…” “What the…?” “Is it supposed to look like that?” “Is it supposed to sound like that?” “Is it supposed to smell like that?” “Has anybody seen the scalpal?” “RUN!”

Or, it could just be the blinding white light that occurs before an explosion.

What was the most valuable lesson you've learned from an encounter with the police?

Do what they tell you to do. If you have an issue, take it up in court with a good attorney.

What’s the difference between an emotionally fragile person and an emotionally immature person?

I can’t think of a thing.

Is it possible to do a good or bad act without prior thinking? Why or why not?

Knee jerk reaction. You actually do act before you have a chance to think.

"The only thing worse than a knee-jerk liberal is a knee-pad conservative."

-- Edward Abbey

What life lesson did you learn the hard way?

If you really love someone, make sure they’re not a coward with a hammer. When you turn your back, they’ll break your heart.

Is there a quote that basically states not to trust people that think you can do no wrong and place you on a pedestal because they aren’t your real friends?

You really need a quote for this? “Don’t trust people who constantly kiss your ass.” Ta-da!

A belief is just a thought in your head you keep on thinking so much you believe it’s true. Would you agree?

No, this would be having “faith” in something. Faith is a belief in something for which there is little or no proof. You believe it’s true because you have faith that it’s so, regardless of evidence to the contrary. But, you can also believe something because of incontrovertible facts.

What makes some people willing to risk their lives to save others? Is it nature or nurture?

Both. They are either brave, by nature, or they have overcome their fear, to nurture.

Is it better to be fearless or courageous?

Fearless is brave, so the original question stands. The answer to the question should be situational. The brave don’t think, they just act. There is no fear. The courageous, on the other hand, have to overcome fear before they act. They need to “summon up the courage.”

When lives hang in the balance, the time it takes to summon up the courage might be too late for you to act. Meanwhile, the brave have rescued who they can. Summoning up courage, however, means you’ve probably run more than one scenario through your brainpan, hoping for one that allows you to rescue all of them and not die yourself.

Personally, I like the thought of having a plan before I jump.

“I wanted you to see what real courage is, instead of getting the idea that courage is a man with a gun in his hand. It's when you know you're licked before you begin, but you begin anyway and see it through no matter what.”

-- Harper Lee

Where do you get value in your life?

True happiness. If you constantly strive to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances, you will never feel worthless.

Would you rather have someone be totally honest with you or totally loyal to you?

I’d rather have an enemy I can trust, than a friend I can’t.

Reader comment: Kinda sounds like the oath to join the mafia.

My reply: Indeed.

Do you think reality TV shows full of conflict changed how people in society interact with each other?

As did soap operas. People are too dense to grasp reality, so they grasp what the media says "reality" is. They end up treating each other as if they’re part of a “reality” show. In reality, people really get hurt, really try to commit suicide, really try to kill someone, and they can really die.

There is enough drama in the real world. It amazes me that people have to search it out in the media. If you want drama, turn off the television. Tell your lover to take you like you’ve been bad. Strip off your clothes and streak the neighborhood. Wear a low-cut blouse and see if the person at checkout looks. Yeah, if she’s a girl see if she looks. If you’re a man, see if he looks. Why are you wearing a blouse if you’re a man? Drama! 

If reality is subjective, and mental illness an opinion, should psychiatry be abolished or made criminal?

Since reality is objective, and one’s opinion is subjective, psychiatry can rest easy and continue to try and assist the mentally ill.

What is the feeling of wanting to give up on someone?

Intense frustration.

“I'm not really sure why. But... do you stop loving someone just because they betray you? I don't think so. That's what makes the betrayal hurt so much - pain, frustration, anger... and I still loved her. I still do.”

-- Brandon Sanderson

Is Joe Biden an inspirational leader?

Be real. He wasn’t an inspirational congressman or vice-president, either. I’m not sure what people were thinking, making him the leader of the free world, but we are paying for it, dearly.

Who said, “learn, unlearn, and relearn”?

Alvin Toffler, 1970.

When did you feel like you had to redeem yourself?

When I first joined the military, my analysis of intelligence information went south. I was so wrong because I “used the book” instead of using good sense. I never used the “book” for analysis from that point on, and I was better for it. I put myself in the position of the enemy and contemplated my next move. I don’t think other intelligence agencies appreciated me pooh-poohing their analysis or blatantly telling them they were wrong.

What is the most meaningful and/or rewarding job you have had?

Almost 23 years in military intelligence, as a significant part of our deterrence program against nuclear war.

Is it a good thing to expect credit for what you are doing?

If your ego needs to be stroked, sure. I expect to be paid for the job I do, and I do the best I can at what I do. The opportunity to perform work is its own reward.

“I wanted to find a workplace where I could fit in and just be myself. I wanted work that was meaningful and to receive credit for the work I did. I wanted a family.”

-- Ellen Pao

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Change, Values, Teams, Intuition, and Trust

“When I look at narcissism through the vulnerability lens, I see the shame-based fear of being ordinary. I see the fear of never feeling extraordinary enough to be noticed, to be lovable, to belong, or to cultivate a sense of purpose.”

-- Brené Brown

 

Why are things changing for the worst?

Voters are not the sharpest tools in the shed.

Is it better to be good but not great or great but not good?

Adolf Hitler was great, but he was a genocidal little shit that wanted to rule the world. Not good. I vote we be good in everything we do, including being great.

What can improve one’s knowledge?

Reading. Discussion. Education. If done correctly, knowledge costs nothing except your time discovering it.

How do you make your own hierarchy of needs?

Use Maslow’s hierarchy as a guide. Understand that a desire is not a need. A need is something that you cannot survive without. To mess with Maslow’s hierarchy is like walking through a minefield. Personally, I’d leave it alone.

Will society ever learn to not glorify narcissists?

If they do, narcissists will go crazy. The suicide rate amongst them will probably climb.

“The faculty to think objectively is reason; the emotional attitude behind reason is that of humility. To be objective, to use one's reason, is possible only if one has achieved an attitude of humility, if one has emerged from the dreams of omniscience and omnipotence which one has as a child. Love, being dependent on the relative absence of narcissism, requires the developement of humility, objectivity and reason.”

-- Erich Fromm

Why is authenticity an important core value?

If you’re “authentic” you don’t have to remember all the inauthentic things, the bullshit, you’ve put out there. Better to be authentic and let people know who you really are. Our “core values” are, basically, our personal code of ethics. They define who and why we are to those around us, so they had better reflect the good, moral, ethics you can stand by.

What are the three biggest problems on earth right now?

Greed. The other two are in there, somewhere. Take care of greed and you take care of everything else.

The sign I ignored at the beginning was not trusting my gut feeling. The bad feeling something was off. I now feel I’ve lost my gut feeling and can’t rely on it. What are some signs you use to identify and keep safe from bad people?

From what you wrote, it seems your “gut feeling” was the only thing you should have relied on, since you ignored it when it tried to warn you.

Our “gut feeling” is our subconscious remembering things our emotions might make us forget. Those lessons we learned but really didn’t think much about until we found ourselves in a similar circumstance.

What you might want to do is pay more attention to your gut.

Does having multiple talents make us useless?

No, but it might make you a jack of all trades and a master of none.

What is your interpretation of human behavior in 2022?

It is becoming more violent. It has become evident, and really no surprise, that people who believe in murdering unborn children are on the razor edge of killing adults. Court rulings can spark violence that leaves a city in ashes, again, no surprise when understanding that law enforcement in these cities has been cut in half. So, who is to blame for all of this? Well, here’s a thought:

“The useful idiots, the leftists who are idealistically believing in the beauty of the Soviet socialist or Communist or whatever system, when they get disillusioned, they become the worst enemies. That’s why my KGB instructors specifically made the point: never bother with leftists. Forget about these political prostitutes. Aim higher. They serve a purpose only at the stage of destabilization of a nation. For example, your leftists in the United States: all these professors and all these beautiful civil rights defenders. They are instrumental in the process of subversion only to destabilize a nation. When their job is completed, they are not needed anymore. They know too much. Some of them, when they get disillusioned, when they see that Marxist-Leninists come to power—obviously they get offended—they think that they will come to power. That will never happen, of course. They will be lined up against the wall and shot.”

-- Yuri Bezmenov (1939-1993), former Soviet journalist and KGB agent

What is the difference between a team and a group?

A “team” agrees to work together toward a common goal. A “group” is just a bunch of people who could be waiting for a good leader to make some of them into a team.

How do I stop needing external validation to get the motivation to continue the things I want to do?

Understand that you are in charge of your life, not someone else. If you’re right, why do you need some putz to validate you? And, if you want to do it, why do you give a damn what someone else thinks about what you want? It isn’t for them, it’s for you. If you want to stop needing external validation, then take control of your own life. It is your life, after all.

What are some things that should not be laughed at?

Death. How someone looks. Loss. And anything someone simply can’t help. Better we should try to show compassion, consideration, and understanding.

What are the things psychologists can tell from people they frequently meet (like work colleagues) who are not their clients?

If they frequently meet them, they become an open book if the psychologist is any good at reading people. People with nothing to hide can feel comfortable around them. Having served in the intelligence field for almost 23 years, and being full of shit and a self-proclaimed hypocrite, I try to stay away from them.

Who or what brings you peace?

The wonder that is exhibited on a small child’s face when they see something extraordinary. It makes me smile and gives me hope.

“Pleasure is always derived from something outside you, whereas joy arises from within.”

-- Eckhart Tolle

Is intuition the same as “following your gut”? Why, or why not?

Pretty much. I think intuition is a feeling you get by weighing all the variables. Your gut has no idea what those variables are, or remembers things you’ve forgotten, but, either way, it is screaming at you for a reason.

What is the karma behind people who won the lottery?

To be determined. It depends on how selfless they are with what they’ve won.

How are negative thoughts related to the subconscious mind? Are they capable of affecting my actions, positively or negatively?

Oh, they’re in there, and they can have subconscious effects on your actions. However, I’m not sure how a negative thought could be positive. If you used a “negative” choice to bring about a positive outcome, that would be defined as a positive choice in the “guise” of negativity, wouldn’t it?

Is there anything in your life right now that you would like to change?

My mother’s health. I’m not cut out to be a caregiver, but I try my best.

Why do people put humanity and kindness in the same category even though humanity does not deserve to be even associated with kindness?

Truth be told, what we loosely define as “humanity” today, is not the definition: Humaneness; benevolence. "He praised them for their standards of humanity, care, and dignity." So, if you’re not being kind, you’re really not being human, by the definition. People put it in the same category because of the definition. People are supposed to act appropriately, to societal standards - the definition, The fact that the majority choose not to is because, well, people are free to define themselves as anything but human.

“Now is not the time for bigots and racists. No time for sexists and homophobes. Now, more than ever is the time for ARTISTS. It’s time for us to rise above and to create. To show humanity. To spread hope. We must prevent society from destroying itself, from losing its way. Now is the time for love.”

-- Kamand Kojouri

Do managers deserve more understanding?

Only if they’re good managers. If you understand the pressure they’re under, it helps you understand why they are doing what they’re doing. It was a standard that employees just need to do the work, they don’t need to know the intricacies of why. We have come to understand that an employee’s knowledge of the business helps invest them in attaining the goals of the business. Everybody wins. A “team” effort. It is up to management to develop this team mentality.

Should one always trust their gut instinct or is it often more productive to think things through before making a decision, even if it means that the decision may not be as quick?

As much as I love good gut instinct.  However, given the time, it would be less of a crap shoot and probably more productive to think things through before making an important decision.

How do you make people do things for you willingly, not resorting to some manipulative antics?

Have you tried asking them? 

What's the best way to reward slain soldiers fighting to save a nation from terrorists, bandits, kidnappers, and unknown gunmen as is the case with present-day Nigeria where their efforts are going unnoticed by the government of the day?

You just stated it, perfectly. Recognition, not only by the government but by the population as a whole. The statement of support needs to overshadow the statement of terrorism, or no progress will be made.

How do you make someone understand the difference between opinion and fact (I was sure proof would work but I was surely mistaken)?

They don’t want to understand, and nothing you say will change their mind. I call these people the League of the Perpetually Offended because they simply don’t want to listen. They are offended that you keep trying to change their mind with facts or truth. How dare you hit them with reality?

“You always own the option of having no opinion. There is never any need to get worked up or to trouble your soul about things you can't control. These things are not asking to be judged by you. Leave them alone.”

-- Marcus Aurelius

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Teachers, Morality, Judging, Life, and Respect

 

“The self-righteous scream judgments against others to hide the noise of skeletons dancing in their own closets.”

-- John Mark Green

What are students' opinions on teachers being fired?

Most students are smarter. They’re better off doing self-study, especially where facts are concerned.

Do smart people know a lot of things?

We are a “jack of all trades” and a master of none. Intelligent people tend to be a master of one, maybe two, but chewing gum and walking at the same time presents one hell of a challenge.

Even if you were one, would you run around with a T-shirt on that said you were a social influencer?

No, I’m too humble to tout my own "abilities" in public, or I’d run around with my fly down.

Do you agree that the truth in itself is not an end to most people, as they will adapt what enables their social life and try to confirm it as the truth?

I love the way you phrased this. Yes, to most people. And, yes, they will try to confirm it as truth. But, the old adage still holds, “The truth will out.” The truth will always be discovered, the facts will always be known, and, to my way of thinking, the idiots that “try” will be seen as, well, idiots to those involved with their social life.

What’s something a friend told you that you’ll never forget?

“Your wife and I are having an affair.” Yep, hard to forget that.  I had connections in assignments.  He discovered there was an "empty quarter" in Saudi Arabia.  Who knew?

“Lies don't end relationships the truth does.”

-- Shannon L. Alder

What is the most objective moral principle?

That morality is universal and not up to interpretation. We all know what they are, so to define them is a waste of precious oxygen.

What does the research say about people who trust their gut instinct?

They live longer?

How do bullies react if you ignore them?

My experience says, violently. But, then, my mouth didn’t help me much, while I was trying to ignore them. 

Reader comment: Haha. I know exactly what you mean.

My reply: You learn when to kick, and where. I had no idea they would puke so hard.

Can people be made to believe anything?

Yes, especially during interrogation.

What should you do if no one likes you at work?

Are you there to be liked or to work? Guess who gets promoted? Do your job and be friendly, they’ll come around.

“If you just set out to be liked, you would be prepared to compromise on anything at any time, and you would achieve nothing.”

-- Margaret Thatcher

What do you call the person who knows everything about you but can't figure out how they know it?

A liar.

Reader comment: And a bozo.

My reply: Indeed. 

Should we judge ourselves for our mistakes and shortcomings in life?

Will it make us feel better? I doubt it. Own your mistakes and your shortcomings. Learn from your mistakes and work on your shortcomings. Do this and you move forward. If you have to judge, judge how far you move, and strive to move farther.

Would a woman with high self-esteem want a man who’s insecure?

Subservient man that she can dominate. Or, did I miss the point?

What is better than life, and why?

And, how would you know? You would have to die or whatever you experience is still part of life. And, if you die and come back, it is still part of life, since you’re back.

What are the effects of an obsession with avoiding failure?

You eventually fail. The longer it takes, the harder they fall.

“Book collecting is an obsession, an occupation, a disease, an addiction, a fascination, an absurdity, a fate. It is not a hobby. Those who do it must do it. Those who do not do it, think of it as a cousin of stamp collecting, a sister of the trophy cabinet, bastard of a sound bank account and a weak mind.”

-- Jeanette Winterson

What is your opinion on asking for free stuff?

If I ever have a need to ask, I will have fallen hard. I cannot imagine such a thing, so it will not happen. Strive to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances. Never quit.

What do you say when something goes wrong at work?

Oops.

What, according to you, is the meaning of life?

Everything that has gone before, that which is now, and my thoughts of the next moment. All of this gives meaning to life.

Who’s the moron who came up with atheism?

Okay, let’s leave the name-calling to the atheists. Rise above it.

Is there such a thing as too many rules for kids?

Nope. Their ability to live life depends on them following the rules. Their inability is what drives the need for more rules. Too many rules? Then, pick and choose. Learn to live life according to societal standards. It really isn’t rocket science.

“It is the beginning of wisdom when you recognize that the best you can do is choose which rules you want to live by, and it's persistent and aggravated imbecility to pretend you can live without any.”

-- Wallace Stegner

How would you manipulate someone? 

A little pain, a little pleasure. The Marquis de Sade was pretty good at it, but it couldn’t keep him out of prison. Interrogation relies on it. But, people have to be susceptible to suggestions.

How has social media helped to create the societal issues we are experiencing today?

To a point. People need to get out from behind the computer and do some face-to-face socializing. We need to stop hiding where people can’t see us and own what we say. What I deal with, almost daily, the perpetrator would never have the temerity to say to my face. It all began with the phone call, but social media has taken it to the next level. Such is an issue social media has helped to create.

What are the signs you don't respect yourself?

I berate myself. Hasn’t happened in years.

How should one react to an attempted apology that is blatantly a non-apology?

Call them down on it. You want honesty, so lead with it. If you feel the apology is bullshit, tell them. They probably think they can get away with it because nobody has the “big brass ones” to call them out for it.

I recently joined a new company and got the least salary among my teammates while I have more related working experience. Am I wrong if I want to resign?

Are you on probation? Usually, a company has a "probation" period when you have to prove yourself and your “staying” power. You are the “low man on the totem pole” and your pay will reflect it. However, this should have been spelled out for you. Ask HR what their policy is. But, you took the job at the pay they offered, so the mistake was yours. Try not to keep repeating mistakes.

“Someone with an inborn knack for mathematics or music may be just as productive as someone who was born with lesser talents in these fields and who had to work very hard to achieve the same level of proficiency. However, we reward productivity rather than merit, for the perfectly valid reason that we know how to do it.”

-- Thomas Sowell

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Weight, Maslow, Wisdom, Liars, and Teaching

“If the older generation can not get accustomed to us, we shall take their children away from them and rear them as needful to the Fatherland.”

-- Adolf Hitler, June 1933

(One might want to fear teacher unions that believe parents have no rights.)

Are there any examples of social influences before the Internet era?

News media, rumor-mongering, and propaganda have been around for a very long time, and are still with us.

Is weight loss a different process after the age of 60?

It is harder. You can eat all the right things, and then your metabolism changes. All the right things aren’t so much, anymore. I have found that if I don’t eat, I can lose weight. Otherwise, I’m being relegated to veggies, fruits, nuts, and exercise. These are all fine if I’ve been doing it for the past 68 years. Teaching this old dog new tricks would be easier if a woman in the “oldest profession” was standing before me. She isn’t… and I’m still screwed.

Is it illegal for students to give money to teachers? Why?

It isn’t illegal, it is unethical of you and for them if they accept it.

How has reaching out to someone in need enriched your own life?

The local medical center needed a volunteer chaplain. I was coerced into the job, visited patients, and held a weekly discussion hour with their PTSD group. I’m still not sure who got the most out of the three years I put in, but I do feel enriched by the experience.

Can the fact that most/many jobs only use a fraction of a person's intellectual capacity, practical skills, experience, insights, etc. be considered a big waste of potential for humanity as a whole?

Yes.

“You learn something valuable from all of the significant events and people, but you never touch your true potential until you challenge yourself to go beyond imposed limitations.”

-- Roy T. Bennett

How do you apply Maslow's hierarchy of needs in the classroom?

This is your “hierarchy of needs” to survive for graduation. Fulfill them and you move forward.

What kind of person you will never respect?

People that show little respect for those who show respect. I run into this all the time with the League of the Perpetually Offended. They tend to show little respect for any viewpoint that is contrary to theirs, and if you dare to agree with them, they will take umbrage at that, as well.

If you answer their question, you have taken the bait. They will attack you, your answer, and, in short order, derisive name calling will begin. You really can’t have an intelligent conversation with folks who can’t put together cogent thoughts. Being a self-admitted hypocrite, one might say I am perpetually offended at those who are perpetually offended.  I tend to offend myself on a regular basis. 

What lessons should other countries learn from the war and conflict in Ukraine?

You could be next?

Does the word “common sense is not common enough” make sense?

Absolutely. What we used to think of as “common” sense, was just “good” sense, and most people exercised it. Well, good sense isn’t that common anymore. I stopped using the term in favor of “good” sense.

What is a failed actor?

A waiter.

“Just because you fail once doesn't mean you're gonna fail at everything.”

-- Marilyn Monroe

If there were no constraints or obstacles, would you date me if you could?

Probably. I'm that kind of guy.

What do you say to a Ph.D. graduate?

“Congratulations! I’m Mr. Villari, or you can call me Master Sergeant. Your choice, Doc.” I’ve known many of them from my time working for an Institutional Review Board. Few impressed me.

Why does he say he wants to be with me but treats me wrong?

He wants to treat you wrong while he’s with you. You have to follow the logic.

I was always handed everything in life, it’s made me lazy and unmotivated. How do I change and work harder? I’m 20.

Change everything you have into cash. Put the cash in an account, and don’t touch it until you’re 25 or you’ve made it on your own. If someone hands you more, change it into cash and bank it as well. You have to make it on your own. If this is too much for you, you will always be a lazy, unmotivated, spoiled little shit. What will it be?

What is an example of personal wisdom?

They call it “personal” for a reason.

“Knowing yourself is the beginning of all wisdom.”

-- Aristotle

How do liars remember what they've said?

You’ve just hit on the problem with being a habitual liar. It’s so much easier to remember the truth.

What famous person said, “Philosophy is life”?

I don’t know, but it is more accurate than saying, “Philosophy of life.” If you live life, you will probably come to understand that life is its own philosophy. On the other hand, the philosophy of life depends on the moron living it. They might come to understand the philosophy of their own life, but not that philosophy is really just life lived. If you pay attention, the philosophy unfolds before you.

Why do people often fail in love?

They forget about the bedrock of friendship.

How can you know what is at the core of your anger when it seems like the smallest things and almost everything makes you angry?

The core of anger is us. We find ourselves incapable of dealing with the lesson life is presenting us because we refuse to see that the lesson deals with controlling emotion. One might say that God is screwing with you. And, He will continue to screw with you until you realize He’s simply screwing with you. Stop getting angry at every little thing, and start seeing them for what they are - lessons. It might be a good time to start learning.

I'm a well-known pianist and random people invited me to play for their events without telling me to pay me. How do I tell them I need a talent fee?

Tell them you’ll drop the contract off to them that states the minimum time you’ll be playing and the total fee, regardless if you run overtime. If they sign it, you get paid.

“There's so much beauty in getting paid to do what you love. That should be at the heart of every business - people getting paid to do what they love.”

-- Hendrith Vanlon Smith, Jr.

Is laziness one of the root causes of arrogance?

It takes some effort to be truly arrogant, so I’d say no. I mean, think about it, you’d have to be ready with arrogance 24/7/365. Who can do that? It takes effort.

If you were a school principal, what kind of teacher should you hire?

One who leaves their personal opinions at home. They are being hired to teach students a set curriculum, not their personal take on society. School isn’t for indoctrination, it is for learning information that will make the student “smart” no matter where their personal path leads them.

The teacher’s responsibility is to teach the good and the bad of the subject matter, not their personal take on it.

How does experience influence perception?

To a large degree, yes. But when one’s “learned” perception is wrong, the new experience is incorporated as an exception and an extra moment might be required when a similar perception is perceived in the future.

Even in 2022, is it tough being an (intelligent/critically minded) atheist in America?

If you have your own belief and don’t push it on others, there should be no problem. Issues arise when people join the ranks of the League of the Perpetually Offended and push their beliefs on others. Whether an atheist or a deist, there is no proof to support either belief. All sides have faith that they are right, and only after death will the truth come out. Calling one side stupid or illogical without providing incontrovertible proof is simply evidence of one’s own illogical stupidity. Better to just have your own beliefs and live in peace.

Where does emotion come from in a movie?

Good writing, directing, and, if humans, good acting. I’m almost 70 years old, retired military, and I still get teary-eyed during Disney’s “The Incredible Journey” and it doesn’t matter which one.

“Emotions, in my experience, aren't covered by single words. I don't believe in "sadness," "joy," or "regret." Maybe the best proof that the language is patriarchal is that it oversimplifies feeling. I'd like to have at my disposal complicated hybrid emotions, Germanic train-car constructions like, say, "the happiness that attends disaster." Or: "the disappointment of sleeping with one's fantasy." I'd like to show how "intimations of mortality brought on by aging family members" connects with "the hatred of mirrors that begins in middle age." I'd like to have a word for "the sadness inspired by failing restaurants" as well as for "the excitement of getting a room with a minibar." I've never had the right words to describe my life, and now that I've entered my story, I need them more than ever. ”

-- Jeffrey Eugenides

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Do We Take Faith for Granted? (Updated post from 12/30/14)

"Accept what Is,

let go of what was,

and have faith in what will be."

-- Sonia Ricotti

What is religious persecution?  Many of us older folks have a pretty good grasp of it from learning world history in school.  If they taught unbiased world history nowadays, many young people would probably also know something about it.  We change history to fit whatever agenda is popular for the day, however.  

After a battle, the victor gets to write the history of it.  It is one reason why children, anywhere but in the southern U.S., have no clue what the Civil War was really about, and the atrocities that were visited upon the south by the north.  One hundred and fifty years later the south is finally rising from the ashes, due to northern immigration, but Mississippi remains the poorest state in the Union.  Still, the majority has faith that what they are taught is the untainted truth, that politicians don't lie, and your doctor isn't "practicing" medicine.  It makes one wonder if our faith might be best left in a future context; "in what will be."

So, historical accuracy, the failing of our educational system, and my rambling all set aside, what do we really know about religious persecution?  And what does any of this have to do with faith? 

Well, Wikipedia says this:

"Religious persecution is the systematic mistreatment of an individual or group of individuals as a response to their religious beliefs or affiliations or lack thereof."

As I interpret this definition, atheists that constantly create legal issues and problems for Christians, and other faiths, are perpetrators of religious persecution.  By the same token, religions that make problems for atheists, not involved in religious persecution, would be guilty of the same persecution due to the atheist's "lack thereof."  I would be very interested to know if the atheists that visit these problems upon people of religious faith understand they are participating in religious persecution of a group of people.  My interest would be in knowing how their sense of morality excuses their actions as being more righteous than that of a theist.

I have been fairly forgiving in the preceding paragraph for two reasons.  I have never heard of atheist groups causing problems for any other faith than Christianity, and I have never heard of any faith causing atheists issues unless the atheist cast the first stone.  It just seems like the League of the Perpetually Offended only has one religious target - Christianity.

The group, Open Doors, has been empowering persecuted Christians throughout the world for over sixty years.  They define Christian persecution this way:

Christian persecution is any hostility experienced from the world as a result of one's identification as a Christian.  From verbal harassment to hostile feelings, attitudes and actions, Christians in areas with severe religious restrictions pay a heavy price for their faith.

Think about this group, Open Doors, for a moment.  Prior to sixty years ago, Christian persecution was so bad they felt it necessary to create a group that is still actively empowering persecuted Christians to this day.  How much do you know about ongoing Christian persecution?  I knew very little until the recent Middle East unpleasantness, and then I researched this post.  I took my faith for granted.  I took it for granted until Islamic heretics in ISIS put children to death for not renouncing their Christian faith.  I took it for granted when Muslims were put to death by the same heretics for not renouncing their sect of Islam to follow radical Islam's heretical interpretation of the Qur'an.  When man blasphemes the word of God to fulfill their own sick agenda for power, we are truly entering the end of days.

Do you take your faith for granted? Ask yourself, this question, "Could you give up your life for your faith?"  This is the question posed by historian Tim Stanley in his article of the same name that appeared in The Catholic Herald on December 9, 2014.  In the article he relates a story:

A family of missionaries are captured by the Communists in Africa, and the Reds say to the father: “If you deny the existence of God, we’ll let your wife and daughter go.” The father is about to renounce Jesus when his little girl takes his hand. “Don’t do it, Daddy,” she says. “Let’s die together as a family. We'll be lost in this life but saved in the next.”

 Accept what is, let go of what was and have faith in what will be.  One must never take faith for granted.  You can accept Christ without forsaking the rest of the world.  By the same token, one must not accept faith in lieu of a "God helps those that help themselves" philosophy.  There are those that say, "Well, God will help me."  Then they sit back and wait for that "help" to arrive.  But the mere term "helping" someone presupposes the person in need is working toward a goal and needs a leg up.  If you're just sitting there on your lazy ass waiting, what you're really saying is, "God, do for me!"  

If I were God, I'd answer, "Hold your breath.  I'll get back to you"

"Just because I'm here for you all of the time,

doesn't mean you can take me for granted."

Another way of looking at faith is the "parachute" principle.  I have faith my parachute was packed correctly.  Do you really?  I think God will respect you more if you double-check it, then check your buddy's chute as well, and then, have them recheck yours.  There is a thin line between bravery and stupidity.  I think that's kind of like faith.  God wants you to have faith that he gave you the intelligence and sense to learn how to pack a chute and check it, twice, prior to jumping out of a perfectly good aircraft.  I believe God is always on the lookout for ways to balance life and death.  Stupid people make this easy by taking faith for granted.  

Look at it from another direction.  George packs your chute in the hanger, it's George's job.  You like George, and trust him, with your life.  George got his "pink slip" this morning, and his wife just filed for divorce and took the kids.  Do you still trust George with your life?  Ignorance is bliss, right?  What you don't know can't hurt you?  What could go wrong?  How is your faith holding up now?  If you didn't have to take on the responsibility for your faith, faith would be tantamount to a crap shoot; having faith that you can do nothing for yourself and still make it through life.  "God, do for me!"  It sounds a bit demanding; like saying volumes without uttering a word.

I'd rather ask God to help me make it through.  Grant me the strength to better myself.  Help me up when I fall, and help me stay the course.  

I was like this in the military.  I was always being put in for this award or that, and I was always runner-up because I didn't suck up.  I finally told everyone to stop putting me in for awards.  It meant more to me if they just gave me a pat on the back and said, good job, keep up the good work.  Everyone seems to get caught up in bragging rights, the benefits that are due to them.  I just wanted to do the job.  I don't want God to do for me, as I don't consider myself greedy in the least, but I wouldn't mind a pat on the back occasionally, just to let me know I'm on the right path.  I am blessed that God does this daily.  Every morning I wake up and am treated to more proof.  I have faith that, through my efforts today, I will wake up tomorrow and enjoy more of God's miracle of life.  

I accept what is, have let go of what was, and I have faith, though honest effort, in what will be.  

This is faith.  I pray I never take it for granted.  

"No bastard ever won a war by dying for his country.  He won it by making the other poor dumb bastard die for his country." 

-- Gen. George S. Patton

My view on faith and religious persecution; I don't plan on ever being put in the position, by some religious heretic, some insane sociopath, to make a choice about my religion or my faith.  I will either make the other poor dumb bastard die, or I will die trying.  They can persecute me to death.  I have much faith that their efforts will go unrewarded.  But, to deny Christ?  I don't know, it would seem we Christians deny Him enough already by taking our faith in Him for granted.  I guess when it comes to someone dictating faith, religion, or my freedom, I would also choose to live free or die trying.

I might be lost in this life, but I will be saved in the next.  I have faith.

"God is until God isn't, and, then, God is again."

-- Frank A. Villari

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com