Long & Short & Tweener Answers

"Tweener: A person or thing considered to be in between two other recognized categories or types."

-- Oxford Languages

( I never woulda guessed.  I thought it was maybe a new gender.)

 

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Note to my readers:  On the "views" front, I went from 9,600 views of my answers to almost 12,000 views this past week.  This would equate to 624,000 views over the course of a year, if it were to continue.  The big "if" here.  As usual, after getting up a doing my "happy dance," I was reminded by the angel on my other shoulder to take the news with all due humility.  I do continue to be humbled that so many read what I have to say with so little disagreement, save those comments by the League of the Perpetually Offended that are "perpetually" expected.  A big thank you to the readers who follow me on this site, on my blog, and on Facebook.

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The long answers:

What is useless knowledge?

“What are you doing tonight?”  Why would I care? I don’t know you. The answer, for me, is useless knowledge.

Why don't people just respect each other and agree to disagree?

Because there is no respect. You can try to respect the offended, to agree to disagree, to no avail. They insist on continuing to be offended because they have no respect. It is their free choice to do so, and I respect that. So, I ignore them, as it is my free choice to do so. There are so many more constructive things to do than put effort into “conversation” when people only want to bait, argue, and be disrespectful, so I pay attention to more constructive things, as much as possible.

What is your "wishful thinking"?

It wasn’t a what, it was a who, and she was half my age. But, it was wishful thinking. 

Is it better to buy holiday gifts in person or online?

If you know what you’re buying, online makes it easier. If you don’t know what you’re buying, you risk sending crap to the recipient. I’d rather shop the store for those things I know little about, This way, I have no doubt about the quality.

Why do I have this intense thirst to be perfect at everything? I overachieve then challenge myself to do better, and then, better.

You like the challenge. But, you “thirst” to be something unattainable. You will never be “perfect,” as perfection does not exist. By your own admission, you constantly try to be better and, then, better. What you are actually challenging yourself to be is as excellent as possible. A noble goal, and I salute your efforts.

“Perfection is achieved, not when there is nothing more to add, but when there is nothing left to take away.”

-- Antoine de Saint-Exupéry

Can someone be attractive and have low self-esteem?

They’re wallowing in a pit they’d love you to join them in. The best thing you can do is compliment them on how attractive they are, and why, and help to build their self-esteem up.

Do senior citizens like having sex with young people?

As I approach 70, I’d have to say the spirit is willing, yes. Over the age of consent, of course.

What would your most beautiful life look like?

A monthly income, a mountain cabin near a fishing stream or lake, and a boon companion to share it all with.

Why do people find it difficult to be content when they lack money, and they act like life equals money?

Life does equal money, so it sounds as if they aren’t content with life, or what life expects of them to produce money.

Can restraint develop a mature intellect about what is acceptable, and what is wasteful?

I would find it hard to believe that “restraint” would foster the development of “mature” intellect. Can it happen? Of course, but it would be the odd occurrence.

“We do not grow absolutely, chronologically. We grow sometimes in one dimension, and not in another; unevenly. We grow partially. We are relative. We are mature in one realm, childish in another. The past, present, and future mingle and pull us backward, forward, or fix us in the present. We are made up of layers, cells, constellations.”

-- Anais Nin

Why do you think that sex and love are closely linked or not?

We, as a society have “linked” them, but we really haven’t. We have sex all the time with people we don’t really love, and we tend to love those we don’t really have sex with all the time. So, I’d say they aren’t linked very well at all.

I just found out my girlfriend followed a guy she’s had sex with before. Is it wrong if I break up with her for this?

It is definitely concerning. I’d ask her about it and decide by how she answers you. But, I’d say you have a reason to find a better girlfriend.

How can you trust yourself without the help of others?

I don’t need the help of others to trust myself. I’m the only person I’m totally sure I can trust. If you have an addiction, like food or drugs, you’ll probably need the help of others until you trust yourself enough to handle it alone.

Which has more value: time or money?

Since time doesn’t really exist, I’d have to say money, even though it has significantly less value than it did on the first of the year.

As a mature lady ready for a relationship, what are the things a guy can benefit from dating you?

Right off the bat, maturity! It has been my experience with mature women, they don't do emotional games, bullshit, arguments, dishonesty, yadda, yadda, yadda. Of course, men should realize that the woman will expect the same in return.

“There is no anti-aging more potent than a young lover bursting with lust for your middle age vulnerability who pulls you out of a rut with his arduous banter and make you whole again with his benevolent smirk”

-- Nalini Priyadarshni

My elder sister just ruined my social life just to save her reputation. How should I feel about that?

Doesn’t say much about her “reputation,” such as it is. Sounds like sis missed the class on ethics. Personally, I’d tell her how you feel and decide what to do by her reaction. Or, you can always “bitch slap” her. It sounds as if she’d be clueless as to why. Letting her know how you feel by talking it out is probably best (keep your hand at the ready, though).

What do you fight yourself over and lose?

Chocolate chip ice cream. I want to change it up, once in a while, but I cave to the chip. I just like what I like.

My boyfriend is the one who took my virginity almost 2 months ago. He expressed to me that sex is gonna eventually get boring because he does all the work. Why am I so hurt and offended by this?

You should be. And, that hurt you feel should take you in the right direction… and into the arms of a more caring man. You made a poor first choice. Learn from it and move on.

What brings you joy for the years to come?

The knowledge that I continuously strive to be happy always and in all things. To wake up each morning thanking God for the gift of another day in paradise and another chance to excel in life. This is joyful happiness! Why? Because the alternative simply sucks.  Oh, people continously try to bait me into feeling poorly, but I have learned to ignore the attempts.

Why does a boy cheat on an ugly girl when his girlfriend is beautiful?

This almost makes no sense... almost.  So, this piece of crap is cheating on an ugly girl and his girlfriend? It would serve him right if the two started dating. Oh, I’m sorry… the answer is, he’s a piece of crap.  But, far be it for me to judge.

"If you can cheat on your girl and come home and look her in the eye and tell her you love her, then you are the lowest kind of man on the pyramid."

-- Unknown

My girlfriend is getting married to someone else next month. What should I do?

Pick better girlfriends. How the hell did this happen, right under your nose? You’d almost have to be in a coma or in the military.

What should I do if people make fun of my underwear option?

Ask them why they’re so insecure about your underwear, and tell them to go find a life. All the crap going down in the world, and this is what they focus on? Just sad.

Does it scare a man when a woman starts to be more romantic, or start a romantic conversation first? Does it make him run miles if he is interested in the person? Do you think romantic talk = sex talk?

Romantic talk is not “sex” talk. If the man wants to take it to the next level, he will welcome to green light. If he’s just there for the date, or the night, he’ll balk.

My fiance never wants sex anymore. We’ve been together for 6 years. It’s just so hard to get sex, and when I do, she's either not in the mood or tells me to hurry up. Is she over me?

Let’s just say that “fiance” floored me after reading this. I’d say the honeymoon is over. How do you feel about marriage, now?

How should you write a condolence letter to a business partner when they are grieving a close relative or close friend?

Buy a card. In the card write, “It goes without saying, I’m here if you need me. I’m so very sorry for your loss.”

"It is never easy to find the words to express our feelings when there are no words that can fully capture the depth of what we’re feeling."

-- Unknown 

And, the short:

 

Is there any reason to be moral in your actions today, or is everything okay if it feels good?

There are plenty of “moral” things that feel good.

Why is everything an illusion?

What? Oh, crap!

How does it feel for a man to know that he is really loved by his wife?

My ex-wife never really loved me, but I’d think he would have a sense of comfort.

What is the best way to get girls to have sex with you as a dominant?

Find submissive girls.

Why is it hard for me to like guys, but easier to like girls (I’m a bisexual girl)?

That would explain it. Guys are like heavy baggage, and girls are a purse. 

What should people learn about wealth inheritance?

How it will be taxed, and the benefit of a “family trust” account.

What does it take to get you in the mood for sex and how would I know?

Take your clothes off. It will slowly become obvious, but you’ll know.

What is something that is often taken for granted?

Appreciation.

Why are some men sexually attracted to women that look evil?

Some men are attracted to dominance.

Which amazing person in your life was born in February?

My mother! 

Why do some people buy a lot of useless items?

They have a lot of “useless” cash.

From what age do you remember?

My mom and dad agree I remember things from 2 or 3 years of age.

Why does my ex still lie to me now that we were just friends?

Hard to teach an old dog new tricks 

Are you easily controlled by other people?

No, but that doesn’t seem to stop them from trying.

What would happen if you were placed in a completely white room, wearing white clothes, and only fed white substances?

I’d leave. Those grits need some eggs and bacon.

Are you a super quick learner or just a tool?

I’m pretty much a tool. But, then, I am humble.

Why does it take one week for one guy and over a year for another guy before a woman becomes interested?

Did she take the guy to bed for over a year, just to be sure?

What is some advice for a 19-year-old girl who has done nothing in life?

Stop waiting for life to come to you. Get out there and live it.

Can someone actually fall in love with their partner over and over?

If the partner keeps it new and interesting, why not?

Is it worse to rape your significant other or cheat on them?

Both are just as horrible, but I’d go to the rape as worse. 

How do I convince my boyfriend to let me go out with my girlfriends?

“I’m going out with my girlfriends.” Where’s the trust?

What should I do after realizing that my girlfriend is having an affair with someone I know?

Dump her, and the “someone” you know. Find better friends and better girlfriends

Can you be happily married to a sex addict?

Please? 

What is one thing that brings you peace at the end of the day?

Bourbon! Two fingers, ice, a splash of water, stir. Tada!

Can money buy you any joy, love, and security?

If you haven’t found them without money, how real and sustaining is what you buy?

“Altruism, generosity, solidarity, and civic spirit are not like commodities that are depleted with use. They are more like muscles that develop and grow stronger with exercise. One of the defects of a market-driven society is that it lets these virtues languish. To renew our public life we need to exercise them more strenuously.”

-- Michael J. Sandel

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as a chaplain at the regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com