Questioning Teachers, Revenge, Secrets, and Narcissism

“The greater the artist, the greater the doubt. Perfect confidence is granted to the less talented as a consolation prize."

-- Robert Hughes

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A note to my readers:  This is the answer that just keeps on giving, so I thought I'd keep updating the statistics for my readers and we'll see where it levels off.  

The following was touted by the site I answer questions on as being "featured" in over 1000 individual digests.  The answer was posted on March 30, 2022, and has been viewed by over 30,500 people, to date, and upvoted 957 times, make that 1,014 times, and counting.  I assume because it was "featured" this is a big deal, so I thought I would share it... again:

Did you ever get a request for a favor from a neighbor who never showed any respect or interest in you or your family? What did you do?

The guy next door. He asked if he could cut down a rotting tree the raccoons use. Wanted to bill me $2000 for a $500 job. I told him not to touch it. He cut it down anyway, when I wasn’t around, then billed me $2000. My legal team, lawyers from Louisiana and Mississippi, both advised me to tell him to go f*** himself. You have to love Southern lawyers. I cleaned the language up and sent him a form letter concerning trespass, ignorance, and the fact that he wouldn’t be getting any money out of me. We do not talk.

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Did your previous mean teachers want you to do what you didn’t want to do?

I didn’t really have any “mean” teachers. The only questionable one was a communist. She tore the American flag off the wall and stomped on it to make some bullshit socialist point, and one of our football players picked it up and dressed here down for her lack of respect. This was in 1970, and our education system has been suffering ever since.

Thinking about your whole life, what are the top things on your bucket list?

A world cruise on an “adults only” ship, or a “sleeper” car on the Orient Express. I’d like to be doted on for a bit.

Why am I revengeful?

Are you revengeful, or vindictive? And was the original sin against you intentional, or accidental?

Revenge: The action of inflicting hurt or harm on someone for an injury or wrong suffered at their hands.

Vindictive: Having or showing a strong or unreasoning desire for revenge.

Either way, what you feel is probably driven by the anger you feel for what was done to you. This anger is what you really have to deal with, as anger and hate will eventually eat at you until you are a miserable person. This would be karma coming back at you for what you feel or have done.

Is revenge wrong? Some would say, yes. Turn the other cheek. Personally, I think it is situational. Was it intentional, or not. But, I don’t think it needs to be worse than the intentional hurt, or harm, done to you. “An eye for an eye” is a good rule of thumb, but two wrongs also don’t make it right. Better to try to make them understand their error and be a better person.

How far does a bullet journey when firing?

It depends on many factors: The bullet’s load, the weight of the slug, the elevation of the barrel, and wind speed and velocity. 

Do 30-year-olds realize that they are old?

40-year-olds start getting a clue. 30 to 40 goes by pretty quick, and 60 starts to come into focus. From 60, one starts to get concerned about longevity, and, as I approach 70, I have accepted my eventual end to arrive sometime in the next 20 years. I would be maudlin were it not for my faith in an afterlife. I made many mistakes in this life that I will endeavor to remedy in the next.

“Most people don't grow up. Most people age. They find parking spaces, honor their credit cards, get married, have children, and call that maturity. What that is, is aging.”

-- Maya Angelou

What should you never forget in your career?

The people who helped you, and those that you can help.

Should you leave the past behind you or would you say it's played a part in shaping who you are?

The mistakes and failures of the past are how we learn for the future. We learn we grow, and we move forward. What we don’t want to do is dwell on those mistakes and failures. Learn from them and press ahead. My own mistakes and failures were nothing more than opportunities for me to learn from the poor choices and decisions I made for my life.

What present do you get for a friend who has everything?

A card.

What is that one thing you know about someone that you wish you had known before the relationship began?

A propensity for violence, their bisexual, in debt beyond their eyeballs, they enjoy pant-down spankings, yadda, yadda, yadda.

How can you tell that I know I’m not the first choice?

You just told us?

“A day without sunshine is like, you know, night.”

-- Steve Martin

I have listed my life achievements, but I only have the imaginations in my head which make me happy always. How can I make it happen?

If your imaginings are doable, do them. You have to take the first step on any adventure.

Why would a man keep you a secret?

He knows you can’t keep a secret? He doesn’t want people to know he’s gay? He’s married? He’s afraid of losing you to his better-looking friends? You both indulge in perverse sex he’d rather keep private? He has a small penis he’d rather keep private? 

Should I distance myself from him after I told him that I like him?

Isn’t that counterproductive? 

What is one thing you know someone should not know?

Telling you would kind of defeat this 

Why is my man insecure about his penis?

Did you laugh at it?

“One of the greatest journeys in life is overcoming insecurity and learning to truly not give a shit.”

-- J. A. Konrath

What is something you know that most people don't?

I’m nothing but a humble stud-muffin.

Do you have any issues with people?

Only with the League of the Perpetually Offended. 

How do I keep a man on his toes?

The easiest way is to quickly grab ahold of his “package” and squeeze? Fair to say, he’ll stay on his toes as long as you keep the “pressure” on.  Better you do this attack from behind and between his legs, however, since he'll find it hard to defeat.

Why do the poor have brains and fail to use them despite knowing the mind is a free gift?

“Free” seems to be the operative word here. Many of the poor are on welfare for a reason.

How do I challenge a man in a relationship?

Money. It’s all about the money. You want to really challenge a man, hit him in the bank account. Or, have a baby and tell him to beat that.  This is a bit unfair, though, since he doesn't have the plumbing.

“Wherever you find a great man, you will find a great mother or a great wife standing behind him -- or so they used to say. It would be interesting to know how many great women have had great fathers and husbands behind them.”

-- Dorothy L. Sayers

When is "time" your worst enemy?

I’m already late for a meeting and this drop-dead gorgeous woman just proposed “now or never” sex to me.

What motivates many narcissists to behave inconsistently towards you?

Psychology. Mind games. I can’t help myself. As hard as I try, I’m simply evil.

What causes many narcissists to have a compulsion to judge others?

Well, by definition they’re selfish, they feel entitled, and they have a lack of empathy and a need for admiration. Basically, they are self-centered. My first blush was just to say they feel they’re so much better than the rest of us, which is kind of the same thing, even though, in reality, they so aren’t all that.  Pretty interesting to screw with, though.

If you made your current BF wait on sex for x amount of dates but found out during that time he slept with other women, would you break up?

Why did you make him wait? Playing games, or seeing what he’d do? Same thing, really. But, he did “wet his wick” and lost the game. Time to go looking again.

Would you date a guy who has bad money habits?

If I were an independently wealthy woman and he was gorgeous and hung like a horse, I could see that happening. Pool men across the nation unite!

“I wondered what happened when you offered yourself to someone, and they opened you, only to discover you were not the gift they expected and they had to smile and nod and say thank you all the same.”

-- Jodi Picoult

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as a chaplain at the regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com