Questions About Life

 

“It is a poverty to decide that a child must die so that you may live as you wish.”

-- Saint Theresa of Calcutta

Isn’t it true that tough times don't last, but tough people do?

Tough times only last if tough people don't work hard to change their circumstances.  In doing so, you must, also, strive to be happy always.  The alternative simply sucks.

Does life end up becoming complicated, even for those who know how simple it is?

It can. Life is about learning to live uncomplicated. Even those who know how simple life is can fall prey to drama. Drama complicates everything. Better to keep all drama away from happiness. They mix like oil and water.

Do you listen to music while working, and how does it help you?

It doesn’t. My son could listen to it while doing homework and still make good grades. Unless it’s “grunt” labor, I have to focus and I can’t do that with distraction. In a previous life, one of my jobs was to perform debriefings. We did them in a quiet room with no distraction so the subject could think and remember details important to the intelligence report.

“If you get stuck, get away from your desk. Take a walk, take a bath, go to sleep, make a pie, draw, listen to ­music, meditate, exercise; whatever you do, don't just stick there scowling at the problem. But don't make telephone calls or go to a party; if you do, other people's words will pour in where your lost words should be. Open a gap for them, create a space. Be patient.”

-- Hilary Mantel

Do you ask enough questions or do you settle for what you know and move on?

I am a product of my intelligence training. I ask questions, then I ask them again to clarify and to see if the answer is the same. If you settle for what you think you know, or what others think they know, you might be wrong. Better to ask enough questions to be sure.

1st Reader comment:  To boost my mind positivity, it’s nice to know that many people ask many questions so that they can have answers in a positive light

2nd Reader comment:  Thank you for enlightening me. 

Who does not want to succeed in life?

People who prefer to wallow in misery, unless they see misery as a success. Success requires hard work. Real success requires constant happiness, as well. Work hard at what you love and strive to be happy always!

How can I enjoy a relationship that I know is eventually going to end?

You already think you recognize the inevitable end, now enjoy the moment. Nothing is set, everything is subject to change. None of us can be certain of what the next moment holds. Enjoy now and let the next moment unfold as it will.

“Lots of things can be fixed. Things can be fixed. But many times, relationships between people cannot be fixed, because they should not be fixed. You’re aboard a ship setting sail, and the other person has joined the inland circus, or is boarding a different ship, and you just can’t be with each other anymore. Because you shouldn’t be.”

-- C. JoyBell C.

Who is that person you regretted dating in high school?

Patti Canepa. I loved her dearly, but she had other thoughts. Like most “kids” we were too young to really know what love was. Turns out it was for the best. I found out just recently, 50 years later, her attractive friend, Joy, wanted me to ask her out, but I thought she was into who she was dating. Life might have taken a much better path, for both of us, had I asked her out. Never assume.

How can I experience God without religion?

Absolutely! I experience God constantly, and I gave up on organized religion, years ago. Develop a “moral code of ethics” and stand by them. Find your own sense of spirituality and explore it deeply. I found that folding in some Zen and Taoist philosophy has expanded my understanding of what I personally define as God.

Should I go ahead and marry a woman who turned down my proposal only to tell me later that she's reconsidered?

No. She started this. Live with her for a year or two and make sure both of you are going to be happy in the relationship. There must be a reason she balked, at first. Find out why and work through that with her while you live together in sin. I love living in sin, I’ve been doing it with the same woman for 20 years.

“I loved you so much once. I did. More than anything in the whole wide world. Imagine that. What a laugh that is now. Can you believe it? We were so intimate once upon a time I can't believe it now. The memory of being that intimate with somebody. We were so intimate I could puke. I can't imagine ever being that intimate with somebody else. I haven't been.”

-- Raymond Carver

What are your top 3 experiences that you think really had an impact on the person you are today?

My psychology major, my military career, and my divorce, in chronological order.

At what point in your life did you realize that giving up was not an option?

This usually happens when you put the gun barrel in your mouth. Do, or do not. It is a choice that you might only make once. Better to think it through and remove the barrel. Strive to be happy always, because the alternative can really suck.

Is science denial a psychological ailment?

I’m not so sure I’d categorize it as an ailment. If the science is bad it should be denied or, at least, put into question, and there is a lot of bad science out there.  Pandemics tend to throw back the covers on some of it, though.  When science gets into bed with politicians, rarely will anything good will be born out of it.

“Those who lack a basic understanding of science will likely drink the kool-aid served by Charlatans and deniers.”

-- Don Rittner

How will you define humility?

The lack of pridefulness.

How can you be happy? What is your philosophy?

Happiness is nothing more than a conscious choice to keep all drama from your life and strive to be happy always. I wake up every morning and thank God for the gift of another day in paradise and another chance to excel in life. One must choose to revel in the gift because the alternative simply sucks. 

What's a piece of advice that changed you for the better?

Avoid drama and strive to be happy always.

“Success comes from the inside out. In order to change what is on the outside, you must first change what is on the inside.”

-- Idowu Koyenikan

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as a chaplain at the regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com