Questioning Slaps, Words, Existence, Tardy, and Trust

“She wasn't afraid of him, and he liked that. He didn't want a meek mouse, no matter that he wanted someone utterly submissive. There was a difference between submissive and spineless.”

-- Maya Banks

Can a slap by a husband to his wife be said to be an expression of excessive love?

If she demands to be slapped in a "submissive" role-playing game, then, yes. Personally, I rather give her a pant-down, bare-butt, spanking. A slap is really too demeaning.

What is a good excuse for forgetting?

You don’t want to go to prison.

How is disrespect right?

Respect is mutual. You get what you give. If you give and do not get it back, you are fully in your right to disrespect the egotistical shit… and give them a piece of your mind during the process.

Recently I left my bestie, and now everyone hates me and wants to torture me. what do I do?

Find new people, preferably more mature, to hang around with. 

What does it mean when a married man says he loves you more than his wife?

Divorce.

Do you like marriage or a girlfriend?

Girlfriend. I did the marriage routine for 25 years. Didn’t work out. Living in sin with my girlfriend, however, has worked out fine for the past 20 years.

“Before marriage, a girl has to make love to a man to hold him. After marriage, she has to hold him to make love to him.”

-- Marilyn Monroe

What is one word that describes someone who doesn't give up easily?

Tenacious or perseverant.

What if you have no problem leaving this world when there's only ugly to see in this world?

The legs I look at seem to contradict the “ugly” in your argument. I see beauty every time I turn around. From the wonder in a child’s eyes to the old couple holding hands, there is much beauty in this world that prohibits me from leaving this world prematurely.

Author's comment: Once you have seen a few hundred of them the novelty wears off, or are you one of those people who still get excited seeing the sunset one more time? Not everybody has that enthusiasm. Been there, done that, seen it all, and even if I haven’t it will only be a slight variation of something similar I will have seen or done, so… Time to leave really? Where is death when you need one? Every day I read in the paper about people dying in wars and car crashes and train crashes and I always think: Fucking lucky bastards. When will it be my time? I can’t wait. Unfortunately, I do not have the courage to help things a bit, but if I could I most certainly would!

My reply: Oh, I get excited at almost every little thing. 23 years in the military taught me not to buy into the League of the Perpetually Offended. I’ve seen some of the worst life has to offer. We live the life we choose… because it is our life, not someone else’s.

Is it right to insult your girlfriend while having sex with her?

Only if her "role" is to play submissive. If not, I’d be guarding the family jewels.

Isn't a wife duty-bound to accept her husband as her master?

Not in this day and age. It would depend on the country and the specific religious fervor that they are bound by.

Why will a husband decide to join his wife abroad?

They are truly in love.

What can we do to show someone we love them when they are struggling with giving up on life and turning their back on God?

What you do has little to do with what they do. Love them. Be there for them if they need a shoulder. Let them know that someone cares.

“Highly sensitive people are too often perceived as weaklings or damaged goods. To feel intensely is not a symptom of weakness, it is the trademark of the truly alive and compassionate. It is not the empath who is broken, it is society that has become dysfunctional and emotionally disabled. There is no shame in expressing your authentic feelings. Those who are at times described as being a 'hot mess' or having 'too many issues' are the very fabric of what keeps the dream alive for a more caring, humane world. Never be ashamed to let your tears shine a light in this world.”

-- Anthon St. Maarten

Why do Americans think everything in the world is named after them?

We don’t. Whoever told you that is ignorant.

What should be the punishment for being late at work without any prior notice?

The punishment is them getting “prior notice” that one more time being late and they’ll be looking for a new job.

What are some ways to tell if someone is lying when they say, "I have to go"?

Offer them “something” that will make them stay.

Which people don't deserve a second chance?

Stupid, irritating, contemptible jerks or idiots. You know, assholes. I refuse to give an asshole a second chance to be an asshole. One chance was more than enough. My ex-wife taught me this lesson.

Should I meet my girlfriend?

If you haven’t met her, how do you know she’s your “girlfriend”? 

Is forgetting an excuse?

One of the most simple.

“The advantage of a bad memory is that one enjoys several times the same good things for the first time.”

-- Friedrich Nietzsche

What does it mean when your crush begins to talk about marriage when she sees you?

You can’t keep stroking the boat. She’s hinting that it’s time to throw the throttles to the stops and take her out… forever.

When is it appropriate to say "I am so embarrassed" to someone?

When you are “so embarrassed” in front of them. It is an honest statement of fact unless you don’t get embarrassed. I’m someone that doesn’t easily embarrass. Someone would tell me my “fly” is down by asking me if I’m trolling. If it’s a woman I’d ask if they’re interested. If it’s a man, I’ll let them know I’m not trolling for them.

How do you know when you can trust your manager?

If the manager is in question, period, I have the wrong manager. 

What should you do if someone asks you out on a date but never shows up?

Don’t fall for it a second time. No phone call, no excuse, they had one shot at glory and they mucked it up. Their lack of appropriate conduct is more evidence that they don’t deserve a second chance.

Is there really a plan for success?

Yes, be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances.

Is there an age when most kids stop being bullied by other kids?

When they can kick the crap out of the bullies, or they graduate and go on to college. I took a tree branch to my bully. My friend had to peel me off of him before I beat him to death. I told him that if he ever came near me again, he’d have to go to sleep sometime. I started standing up for those who could not defend themselves until I joined the military “Intelligence” field.

“A young outcast will often feel that there is something wrong with himself, but as he gets older, grows more confident in who he is, he will adapt, he will begin to feel that there is something wrong with everyone else.”

-- Criss Jami

Why do I exist even if I don't want to?

This is a question only you can answer.

What should you do if you break up with your boyfriend and he wants to talk about the future?

Tell him, you broke up with him, so his vision of the future has nothing to do with you. Smile and walk away. 

How would an introvert feel if his girlfriend had male friends?

Like an emasculated introvert.

Why does our partner ignore us and talk to others about personal things?

Why are you still with them? This shows a blatant and public lack of respect.

What does it mean when a guy says, "We should talk," after a breakup?

It means has all new shit to try out on you. Better to understand you have nothing to talk about, especially with someone you broke up with. You should be moving on to greener pastures, not listening to excuses, reasoning, and whining.

What should a husband say when his wife says she is not ready for another child?

“Yes, Ma’am.” Or, perhaps, “Thank God…”

When God Created Mothers

When the Good Lord was creating mothers, He was into His sixth day of "overtime" when the angel appeared and said. "You're doing a lot of fiddling around on this one."

And God said, "Have you read the specs on this order? She has to be completely washable, but not plastic. Have 180 moveable parts...all replaceable. Run on black coffee and leftovers. Have a lap that disappears when she stands up. A kiss that can cure anything from a broken leg to a disappointed love affair. And six pairs of hands."

The angel shook her head slowly and said. "Six pairs of hands.... no way."

"It's not the hands that are causing me problems," God remarked, "it's the three pairs of eyes that mothers have to have."

"That's on the standard model?" asked the angel. God nodded.

"One pair that sees through closed doors when she asks, 'What are you kids doing in there?' when she already knows. Another here in the back of her head that sees what she shouldn't but what she has to know, and of course the ones here in front that can look at a child when he goofs up and say. 'I understand and I love you' without so much as uttering a word."

"God," said the angel touching his sleeve gently, "Get some rest tomorrow...."

"I can't," said God, "I'm so close to creating something so close to myself. Already I have one who heals herself when she is sick...can feed a family of six on one pound of hamburger...and can get a nine-year-old to stand under a shower."

The angel circled the model of a mother very slowly. "It's too soft," she sighed.

"But tough!" said God excitedly. "You can imagine what this mother can do or endure."

"Can it think?"

"Not only can it think, but it can reason and compromise," said the Creator.

Finally, the angel bent over and ran her finger across the cheek.

"There's a leak," she pronounced. "I told You that You were trying to put too much into this model."

It's not a leak," said the Lord, "It's a tear."

"What's it for?"

"It's for joy, sadness, disappointment, pain, loneliness, and pride."

"You are a genius, " said the angel.

Somberly, God said, "I didn't put it there.”

-- Erma Bombeck

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions, and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I have come to believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance... he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com