Questioning Lackluster Guidelines (Repost of a previous post, different imagery.)

 

“In our lives, on average, we will be asleep for a total of 8,477 days. If we’re lucky, some of that time will be sleeping next to someone we love.”

-- Unknown

What does it mean when a guy says he doesn't like sleeping alone?

Insecurity. I know the feeling. He needs a “teddy” to make him feel secure.  

What is the best advice you or someone else has had?

Stay out of debt. If you have debt, you owe someone. Better not to owe anyone. If you have debt, you are an “indentured servant” until the debt is paid. Slavery never ended, they just changed the rules. Almost everyone is an indentured servant. It’s not “what’s” in your wallet, but “who.” Ask yourself, “How many people own me?” Any debt you carry is someone owning your life.

What does it mean if a guy says he wants something serious but has red flags on his dating profile?

He’s probably full of it.

Reader comment: Have been chatting with a guy for over 1 year. I did get sucked in to send him, only $850au from last November to March this year. I have stopped, but he still wants to maintain contact. I also was sucked in and gave my bank details so I could receive and send money to a colleague of his. He says his bank is red-flagged in Yemen. Since then I've closed my bank account and opened a new one. Is he definitely a scammer?

My reply: Ya think? If you don’t know someone “personally,” then don’t give them anything. I have many beautiful women contacting me, but, in the back of my mind, I just know, they are fat ugly guys in some backroom in Chicago.

What would be a good way to tell someone that they ruined their own relationship with their actions and behavior?

It is their life, not someone else’s. The only person that can ruin their life is them. They made a choice or decision that was wrong or bad. They can try to shift the blame, but the blame will stick to them like that bad choice or decision they made.

What is the solution to confusion?

Being certain.

Why is atheism increasing? Is there some form of brainwashing going on?

It takes work to have an undying faith, a belief in something for which there is little or no proof, but for which you have to pay homage. Atheism requires faith in their belief, but they have to do no work to pay homage. They have accepted that when life ends, that’s it. For the theist, it will be much less crowded moving forward into the next life. There is no brainwashing, per se, for atheism. It is a matter of a desire to move forward into the next life, or not. Theists believe the ultimate power in the universe will “recycle” the energy of the soul. Atheists, not so much.

“That which can be asserted without evidence can be dismissed without evidence.”

-- Christopher Hitchens

How will a lady find true love?

Stop looking. If you take care of yourself, love yourself, and strive to be more than you are, someone with a brain will notice. True love will find you.

What are some alternative ways to define what is most valuable in life besides financial success?

Understand that “success” is nothing more than true happiness in life. Make the conscious choice to strive for true happiness always and in all things you do, regardless of your circumstances. Anything else is simply attaining goals you’ve set for yourself. Financial stability is only one of many goals you try to attain.

What are 3 deep questions that nobody dares to ask you?

What is the meaning of life? What is God? Why?

What are some creative ways you use to express yourself?

Honesty. I have no filter, so what I think is what I give voice to. Is this rude? More times than not. Is it the truth? More times than not. Like everyone else, I can blow smoke up your ass, or, I can give you an honest assessment. I’d like to say the choice is yours, but… I have no filter.

Why can't I stop thinking that I can't do anything?

You managed to ask this question, so, now, you can stop thinking.

Why do people fail to think?

They believe they have no time to think. They rush everywhere and consider thinking as, pardon the pun, a second thought. They go into debt for the crap they really don’t need. They buy expensive cars when an average one will get them from here to there. They buy a house too big for what they really need, and so on and so forth. When people get a credit card, or four, they lose their little peanut minds. They become an indentured servant, a slave, to credit companies. This is true for almost all aspects of life. They don’t take a moment to think about actual reality, not that fantasy dancing in their head.

“Poirot," I said. "I have been thinking."

"An admirable exercise my friend. Continue it.”

-- Agatha Christie

Is it possible to treat someone with respect but not give them what they want from us?

Respect has nothing to do with letting them take us to the cleaners, emotionally or financially. Honesty is a sign of respect. You have the right to say no.

Would my husband leave me because of my attitude?

It took me 25 years to leave my wife because of her attitude. I’ve been happy ever since.

What is the difference between being a nice guy and being a pushover when it comes to relationships?

Naievte. You don’t have to be naive to be a “nice guy” in relationships. I am friends with many people I don’t really know that well. I keep my eyes and ears open to learn who they really are. So far, I have not been disappointed. I’m a pretty good judge of character if I have a chance to be around them. The best rule of thumb is to not let your guard down.

What do women say behind men’s backs?

“Nice butt.”

Author's comment:  So true. Only we usually say it this way, “Cute Butt!”

My reply:  Lol... Indeed!

Do big women give the best oral sex?

I'm going to answer this because it made me chuckle.  It is all about a woman's desire, effort, talent, and ability to take charge. It is not about a woman’s size or girth. Big, medium, or small, all can make a man’s mind explode, leaving him a babbling idiot incapable of speech.  

What does it mean when a girl says, “I’ll be there for you no matter what”?

Check’s in the mail.

“When some wild-eyed, eight-foot-tall maniac grabs your neck, taps the back of your favorite head up against the barroom wall, and he looks you crooked in the eye and he asks you if ya paid your dues, you just stare that big sucker right back in the eye, and you remember what ol’ Jack Burton always says at a time like that: ‘Have ya paid your dues, Jack?’ ‘Yessir, the check is in the mail.'”

-- Jack Burton

Is it okay to be uncomfortable with somebody who is a people pleaser? For example, a friend who you aren't close to being suspiciously generous towards you?

Absolutely. What are they after?

Does being married make it easier to love someone?

No. Making a commitment to truly love someone, with all your heart, is so much better than marriage. Marriage has become about the piece of paper that allows you to dodge taxes, rake someone over the coals in a divorce, and prove you are “married” to those who demand proof. If you truly love someone who truly loves you in return, of what use is a piece of paper other than preparing for future selfishness?

Should I expect people with bad pasts to behave in the same way as they did in their past?

Until they prove otherwise, yes. Due to their past indiscretions, they have to earn forgiveness and trust.

Why do I always fail to succeed?

Failure and mistakes are life lessons we are supposed to learn so we mitigate failure the next time. It isn’t that you failed, we all fail. It is what you do with the failure that counts. 

“Success” is not attaining your goals. “Success” is finding true happiness always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances. This is true success in life, and you can’t ask for anything more important than happiness. We all strive for true happiness.

Why do we blow things at the end?

Poor planning.

Can a person live without another person?

They can, but it will be a very lonely existence. I like to have some “me time” throughout the year, but I also like to have social friends and lovers who understand my need. 

“Although I am a typical loner in my daily life, my awareness of belonging to the invisible community of those who strive for truth, beauty, and justice has prevented me from feelings of isolation.”

-- Albert Einstein

What do you think if humans have no name at all in this world?

Everyone would have to take time to look when some putz yells, “Hey, you!” And everyone will be doing it since no one has a name.

What's the most common reason for infidelity in relationships?

Lack of good communication.

How do you ask your man for a certain position if he's a little inexperienced?

Instruction! Tell him. A man loves getting instruction, especially for certain positions and if they’re inexperienced. Learning is the spice of life! If he doesn’t believe this, maybe it’s time to go shopping.

What is the greatest value in life?

True happiness.

Why would a married man be overtly protective of a woman who is not his wife?

If he’s a real man, it will be in his nature. His wife will understand this... if their relationship is solid. If it’s not, his motives might be in question.

What are some reasons why a man should protect his girlfriend or wife?

This is going to be seen as chauvinistic, but… The fact that the man is even with them, romantically or otherwise, signifies the man has made an unspoken commitment to protect them from harm. The man can run away or cower like a child, but that will only define him to everyone else.

I would love to step in front of a woman to protect her, only to have her pull me back and say, “I’ve got this.” Hell hath no fury like a woman, scorned or not. I would love to be with a capable woman in danger.  I would step up and tell her, “If I fail at this, kill him.”

“You are a man with a protective instinct. To care that deeply is a blessing. But like most blessings, it can also be a curse.”

-- Louise Penny