Questioning Waste, Humility, Trust, Players, Falling, Dating, and Fugly

“The Edsel was a classic case of the wrong car for the wrong market at the wrong time. It was also a prime example of the limitations of market research, with its ‘depth interviews’ and ‘motivational’ mumbo-jumbo.”

-- John Brooks

Why do many people waste money on stupid things?

Because they’re stupid? The bigger question is, do they go into debt to buy these stupid things? I am critical of almost everything I purchase. Is it quality? Will I really use it enough? Can I afford to spend money instead of on something I really need?

I have two adult tricycles that are rusting from disuse. I have a bike I haven’t ridden since the tricycles stopped being used. I really didn’t think the “use” factor into the equation. I was in my early 60s when they were bought. Walking would be more healthful, especially when we live a block from the beach. On the other hand, the golf cart I use the heck out of. Exercise still takes a back seat, however. Critical thinking is a concept, like market research.

"Questions" ending with "What do you think about that?" are unimaginative and annoying attempts to get comments without actually asking anything, what do you think about that?

It is what it is.

Why do you always have to give something to get something?

Balance. There must always be balance in the universe, or things will go wonky. If you give nothing, something won’t be forthcoming the next time. Even a simple “thank you” is considered high praise for those who give selflessly.

Why do some people tend to make snap judgments about other people?

They are, after all, judgmental. It is what they do.

As a Hispanic With a mild intellectual disability and a big heart, how can I make the world a better place and make people happy from time to time, help people in need, and make a change for my community and everyone else?

An honorable goal for someone with a "disability" to tackle. But, a “big heart” and a selfless attitude are as important as being intelligent. You seem to be smart, as you came on here to ask this question. Being "smart" is, sometimes, more important than being intelligent. Very few of us are intelligent and smart, so revel in that big heart you have and put your "smarts" to work on this problem.

“When you know someone close to you who are quiet or smaller or missing, seek them out, they may need to be found again. It is most beautiful to turn off our ego and feel true empathy for others. Compassion, sympathy, kindness, empathy, selflessness, etc. are the biggest signs of a person with a good soul and a big heart!”

-- Angie Karan

Why do people act humble in front of everyone else but are the complete opposite one on one?

They are trying to impress. Most people see through this, but we do it anyway. 

As an adult, what can I do to help with my emotional control and emotional reasoning?

Take a moment and think before you act. Consider your control and reasoning, and ask yourself if it’s what you want. If it isn’t, then this is the time to adjust it. You have to take a moment to think. If people demand an answer, tell them you’re thinking about it. Screw them and their demands. You are working on something more important to you than their issues.

Is that "exactly" the key to success? Or that’s "exact" the key to success? Which one is right?

Exactly. Or, if you add “the” to the second choice, it will be more correct. “That’s the exact key to success.”

What are the potential reasons for not answering a question?

The answer isn’t in your wheelhouse, the question answers itself, or you answered the question numerous times before. You can always assume they’re a member of the League of the Perpetually Offended casting bait out to see if you’ll bite. The latter is more challenging to get correct, but not impossible. The League is not all that intelligent.

What does mean if "person A" can hold eye contact with another person without a problem when they cannot do that generally with other people? What does that say about "person B"? Is it confidence, dominance, or just trust?

You’ll have to ask “Person A” this question. It could signify many things.

“Some adults are so self-conscious that they are unable to look, for longer than two seconds, a child or even an animal in the eye.”

-- Mokokoma Mokhonoana

Why do we trust someone blindly?

I have no idea since I’m not that ignorant. Blind trust is when you are out of options. Grab the rope or die. You have to trust them as your only source of survival. I hope never to find myself relying on anyone but myself. Put your trust in other people, and you stand a real chance of being disappointed.

How do you respond when people ask, "You're having a what"?

“A wet fart. What did you think I said?”

Why do so many people struggle to consistently do the right thing, even when they know it's the morally or ethically correct choice?

It is so much easier to do the wrong thing. You don’t have to think about it. For many people, doing a selfless act means they have to think about it, agree to do it, and try to be selfless in the execution of it.

Is the fear of the unknown irrational?

Not if you want to stay alive.

What is the best way to defend a philosophy?

If it makes good sense, there is no need to defend it. If someone disagrees with it, you may have to clarify it, or simply ignore ignorance. A good philosophy, again, needs no defending.

“It is what it is, and what it isn’t, it isn’t.
Sometimes, what it is, it isn’t, and what it isn’t, well... it is.
Other times it's nothing, and then it's anything.
But, if it's nothing, it isn’t, and if it's anything, it is.
But, naming "nothing" makes nothing something;
Therefore, whether it is or it isn’t, it must be,
Because, even nothing that isn’t, already is.”

-- F.A. Villari

He is a player. Does he deserve my kindness and my pure heart?

He’s a “player” and you know this. If he is deserving of your kindness and pure heart, then, so be it. Should you be involved with him romantically? He’s a player.

How would you reflect and summarize your personal journey in learning leadership development skills according to the core model?

There’s a “core model”? News to me. I learned all my management skills in the military, for 23 years. I took them into the civilian sector for another 17 years. I’d say the military did a pretty good job of teaching leadership skills.

Would you answer the door if someone was ringing or knocking on your door at 2 in the morning?

Yes, but then, I have a gun. More importantly, I know how to use it.

How do I learn without getting stressed or bored?

Learn what interests you. I took a “full load” of psychology in college for two years. I never cracked a book, and I still came away with a B+ grade average. I wasn’t stressed or bored because I absorbed what I loved to learn. My psychology got me an Intelligence job in the Air Force for 23 years. I wasn’t bored or stressed about that, either.

What do you wish to know about me?

Nothing.

“We can know only that we know nothing. And that is the highest degree of human wisdom.”

-- Leo Tolstoy

Do you know the old saying "the bigger they are, the harder they fall"? Do you think that also applies to matters regarding height?

Absolutely.

How do I properly interface with reality?

You are in reality. You are interfacing with it. If you aren’t in an asylum straightjacket, you must be doing a pretty good job of it.

What is the most important privilege that you want to keep?

Freedom.

What does it mean to live by your word? What are some ways to keep promises and commitments without letting others down?

That’s exactly what it means to “live by your word.” If you make promises and commitments, you need to follow through with them and keep your word.

What are some signs that your girlfriend may be a penny pincher?

Charging me for sex would be a pretty good tell.

"Sex in a woman's world has the same currency a penny has in a man's. Every penny saved is a penny earned in one world and in the next every sexual adventure is a literary experience."

-- Harry Golden

What can make a man happy when he is dating a woman?

Really?

Why do people have a fear of never being able to move on from their past relationships?

I’ve never had that fear. We divorced, and I moved on… several times. I became ecstatically happy. I wasn’t aware this was wrong. Was I supposed to be afraid?

Can atheists respect other religions and their followers?

I don’t think it’s in their wheelhouse.

What is wrong with a woman who wants to change you?

If you’re an ass, she’s trying to do you a favor. If you’re happy being an ass, she should mind her own business.

When does a man lose interest in a woman?

When she is no longer an interesting person.

“If someone doesn’t care about himself, you begin to lose interest after a while.”

-- Kem Nunn

Why do I look so fugly as a guy when I'm using that gender-swap thing?

Stop using the “gender-swap” thing.

Why would you choose one air force over another?

Why would I choose another air force over my home country? This makes no sense unless I’m moving to that country from my own.

Are there couples who never ever have a fight or disagreement?

How boring would that be?

Does science or logic support any religion?

No, but, then, religions are based on faith, not science or logic. Faith is a belief in something for which there is little or no proof. Science and logic demand proof.

Is it necessary to spend money to have fun on a first date?

Oh, hell no.

“Relax, no one is asking you to decide on whether to cut the red wire or the blue wire. It's just a date!”

-- Kevin Darné

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions offered. After over twenty years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier, and world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. 

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com