Questioning Cheats, Time, Integrity, and I.Q.

"Well, after one hundred years, essentially, of careful statistical analysis, the Armed Forces concluded that if you had an IQ of 83 or less there wasn't anything you could possibly be trained to do in the military at any level of the organization that wasn't positively counterproductive. Okay, you think, well, so what, 83, okay. Yeah, one in ten! One in ten! That's one in ten people! And what that really means, as far as I can tell, is if you imagine that the military is approximately as complex as the broader society, which I think is a reasonable proposition, then there is no place in our cognitively complex society for one in ten people. So what are we going to do about that? The answer is, no one knows." 

-- Jordan B. Peterson

What is the average amount of time that you have for yourself once you finally sit down for the day?

23 hours. Being retired and almost 70 years of age, I reserve most of my day for what I want to do. Yard work is exercise. Housework is exercise. Building a bookcase for my girlfriend is exercise. I love to exercise. 

Everything I choose to do is time for myself. Very few things in my day do I choose not to do. This was also true of my two careers. You have to choose to be truly happy always and in all things. If you do this, everything becomes time for you.

What does it take to gain your respect?

Generally, you get what you give.

How can someone know if it is classic depression or a miserable marriage?

When did the depression start? Mine started shortly after saying, “I do.” My depression lasted 25 years and ended when the divorce was finalized. A classic, depressing, miserable, marriage.

If you were God, what was the most unforgettable moment in your professional life?

I’m God, and I forget nothing.

Very ugly to live. Should I live?

It isn’t what you look like that makes you valuable to society, it is what you bring to the table. So, if you are truly ugly, are you intelligent or smart? Why should the truly ugly person who will cure cancer and be world-renowned, not live? Life is more than one’s looks, and true love has more to do with the personality that physical looks. Throw a party, and be the life of it.

“I have been finding treasures in places I did not want to search. I have been hearing wisdom from tongues I did not want to listen. I have been finding beauty where I did not want to look. And I have learned so much from journeys I did not want to take. Forgive me, O Gracious One; for I have been closing my ears and eyes for too long. I have learned that miracles are only called miracles because they are often witnessed by only those who can see through all of life's illusions. I am ready to see what really exists on the other side, what exists behind the blinds, and taste all the ugly fruit instead of all that looks right, plump and ripe.”

-- Suzy Kassem

Where has your spouse taken you in life?

To the cleaners. 

Does desperately wanting a romantic partner make me unwell?

No, it makes you unloved by a romantic partner. Now, I have a romantic partner, but I still want to be loved by other romantic partners. Does that make me unwell? I would think so. I mean, how many "romantic partners" can one old guy juggle?

Would you rather be forced to live the same day over and over again for a full year, or take 3 years off from the end of your life?

Only if I get to choose the day, but, I'm not so sure she’ll agree.

Do you always accept consequences?

If I deserve them, of course. The consequence must be the result of some choice or decision I made. We made a point of pressing ownership in the military. Own it, fix it, and deal with the consequences, if any.

Is ignoring a text passive-aggressive?

For me, it’s more passive, like, I don’t need your drama.

In your own perception, what is more important, character or integrity? Why?

Your character should be driven by your integrity. Standing by your integrity defines who you are, your character, to those around you. With this being said, I have to go with “integrity” as my answer. 

“Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one.” 

-- Marcus Aurelius

Why is it not advisable for one to trust in their reason when creating their plan?

No one is perfect. When developing a plan, even if you review it yourself, you will find things you missed. If a team is involved, better to have the entire team review the plan before finalizing it. If I write a paper, I take it to someone else to review before I publish it. This is just smart quality control.

Would you rather be stuck in Jumanji or Zathura? Why?

Zathura. I liked both movies, but I’m a science fiction fan at heart. Jumanji was more “fantasy.”

How does not having formal education make people go through life suffering from inferiority complexes?

As opposed to “informal” education? I had two years of college before I was drafted in 1972. I certainly don’t suffer from any “inferiority” complex. Maybe it was the military career, but I consider myself as having a “master's” degree in military science.

People have choices to make for their lives. One is to feel inferior to everyone else. I would think that if you have a good “personal code of ethics” you are so far ahead of most people, even those in positions of responsibility, like elected politicians. You are how you view yourself. Better to view yourself as an equal to those around you.

What is the kindest thing you have done for someone without telling anybody about it?

That would be telling.

What do you do if your job compromises your morals?

Find another job. You should never compromise who you are, your code of ethics, for anyone. If your “personal code of ethics” is worth anything to you, it will demand you confront your employer with your concerns and resign if necessary.

"Ethics is knowing the difference between what you have a right to do and what is right to do".

-- Potter Stewart

Is it morally okay to tell a lie to uncover a lie?

No. Two wrongs might make a right, but you’re still just as wrong. 

Is it good to lie just to make a situation right?

It is never right to lie, and two wrongs really won’t make it that right. 

How do you say, "I love you" to a friend who avoids looking straight into your eyes?

Grab them by the shoulders and tell them to look you in the eyes, because you have something important to say.

My IQ is 60. And I think something is wrong. What should I do in this situation?

First of all, IQ makes everyone go wonky for no reason, and “reason” is the underlying measure of a person/s IQ:

“IQ, short for intelligence quotient, is a measure of a person’s reasoning ability. In short, it is supposed to gauge how well someone can use information and logic to answer questions or make predictions. IQ tests begin to assess this by measuring short- and long-term memory. They also measure how well people can solve puzzles and recall information they’ve heard — and how quickly.” 

--What is IQ - and how much does it matter?

If you’re not a “test-taker” it might have a bearing on your results. I was an average student that almost didn’t graduate from high school. But, the military gave me their “IQ” test and I scored well enough to put myself in the top ten percent of Air Force personnel. It was a good day and I tested well.

Truth be told, I’m not the most intelligent person, but I am smart. I have great “reasoning ability,” I am logical, I solve puzzles, and I use the information to make predictions. This all helped to place me with Air Force Intelligence.

If you “think something is wrong” because of your score, you are reasoning, and you are asking intelligent questions to gather the information you can use to help yourself. Gee, sounds like you’re trying to solve a puzzle. Do you see my point? You might not test well, and you might be “smarter” than you give yourself credit for.

What do you know about your partner before getting married?

That they will love you unconditionally, forever, as you should for them.

“So it's not gonna be easy. It's going to be really hard; we're gonna have to work at this every day, but I want to do that because I want you. I want all of you, forever, every day. You and me... every day.”

-- Nicholas Sparks

Should men divorce a cheating wife?

Unless you enjoy the fact that she is cheating, yes. And, the same goes for women whose husbands are cheating.

Why would a man remain married to a woman who cheated and got pregnant by someone else?

He’s an idiot? 

How do you handle a cheating husband?

I wouldn’t handle any of him, not without surgical gloves. You have no idea what STD he’s been infected with.

Can a cheating spouse love you?

As much, as it seems, they love everyone else.

What do all cheating husbands have in common?

The same things cheating wives have in common. They cheat. Is this a trick question?

“Cheating in a relationship is a sign of self-regulation failure. When it happens ones, it is a mistake. When it happens twice, it is unfortunate. But when it happens thrice or more, it is a pattern indicating primitive, uncivilized inhuman behavior.”

-- Abhijit Naskar

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as a chaplain at the regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com