Questioning Timing, Jerks, Promises. and Forgiving

 

“They say, timing is everything. But then they say, there is never a perfect time for anything.”

-- Anthony Liccione

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A note to my readers: I'm continuing to update the statistics for those who'd like to follow with me and we'll see where it levels off, which it doesn't seem willing to do.

The following was touted by the site I answer questions on as being "featured" in over 100,000 individual reader digests (as of the previous report it was shared in only 10,000 digests). The answer was posted on March 30, 2022, and, to date, has been viewed by over 268,800 people and upvoted 3,644 times, and counting. I assume because it was "featured" this is a big deal, whatever "featured" means. I will contine to share it weekly, for those who haven't read it:

Did you ever get a request for a favor from a neighbor who never showed any respect or interest in you or your family? What did you do? 

The guy next door. He asked if he could cut down a rotting tree the raccoons use. Wanted to bill me $2000 for a $500 job. I told him not to touch it. He cut it down anyway, when I wasn’t around, then billed me $2000. My legal team, lawyers from Louisiana and Mississippi, both advised me to tell him to go f*** himself. You have to love Southern lawyers. I cleaned the language up and sent him a form letter concerning trespass, ignorance, and the fact that he wouldn’t be getting any money out of me. (Last lines have been updated) We don't talk, not because I'm not willing, but because he seems to think he's all that. He flies a Marine Corps flag. So far, I'm not impressed.

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At what age will someone start facing challenges?

This will depend on what their situation is. A child with abusive parents will face dramatic challenges early on, as opposed to a child who has a stable family life. What we are taught about handling drama in life has a great bearing on the challenges we face, and when we start facing them.

Unfortunately, we let the government, for the most part, raise our children in a school environment. They learn little or nothing about handling drama and much about creating it. The family unit needs to wrest back control of the education of our youth, especially how they learn to find true happiness and attain their goals, not those goals of the state.

Why do people put up with jerks or assholes?

There, but for the grace of God, go us. 

Even though something bad happen a long time ago, it still happened. Even if someone did something wrong to you a long time ago, it still happened, unless it was when both were kids below the age of 18?

It still happened. What age you are, has no bearing on the reality of what happened. However, the age of the child does have bearing on their understanding of what they did and why they did it. I have great remorse over some things I did as a child, under the age of 18, that I wish I could take back or apologize for.

What is the best way you’ve taken revenge on an awful teacher?

I’ve never had to. Karma always seems to catch up to them in short order.

Have you been through such an incredible situation that people, upon recounting your incident, thought you were lying?

Yes, both of my vehicle accidents that I should have died in. The police reports and the witness accounts bear out what I was told about the “unusual” and unbelievable events surrounding my survival of both events.

"Reality is that which, when you stop believing in it, doesn't go away."

-- Philip K. Dick

 It has been two months since my ex blocked me. We were together for years. Does that mean he’s still mad or has forgotten about me? Will he come back and explain why?

Why do you care, he’s your ex? It’s time to move on and ditch the drama.

What would it take for former President Trump to not be convicted of any crimes?

In order to be convicted of a crime you, first, have to have committed a crime. So far, everything seems to have been “trumped” up. Grasping at straws can be tiring and expensive.

Is it hard to make a promise when you know you can't fulfill it?

Oh, hell no. It is so very easy to make promises you know you can’t fulfill, but it is extremely unethical, which is why you shouldn’t do it. Basically, you’re lying. You are being okay with leaving these folks, the poor saps you made promises to, out in the cold. The upside is, if they’re smart, they’ll stop relying on you as you evidenced yourself to be unreliable (e.g., a lying little shit). It works out for both of you, on some shallow level.

Do you need to get your priorities straight?

Yes, otherwise your life is can be a confusing mess with the important issues being set aside in favor of bullshit.

Is getting a failure in life actually good?

It depends on what you do with it. Failure and mistakes are the best way we learn if we learn. You have to admit to it, own it, critique why it happened, correct what happened, and try again, and again until you get it right. It’s called perseverance in the face of, what could be, overwhelming odds. It can be a builder of great character and even better ethics.

“Success is stumbling from failure to failure with no loss of enthusiasm.”

-- Winston S. Churchill

How might narcissists play on your fears in an effort to keep you spiritually grounded?

Narcissists will play on my fears, given the chance, but they could give "one rat's ass" about keeping me spiritually grounded. They’re too wrapped up in themselves.

How do you build yourself again after a relationship that destroyed the floor you walked on, meaning your beliefs, your dreams, and your overall view of the world?

You discover true happiness in simply being alive. Been there and done this, after a 25-year marriage and a divorce that left me with nothing, including my right to be a father, and put me at the door to suicide. You survive. You find the reason to live is life itself. You rebuild everything you lost, even better than it was, and totally piss off those who would have destroyed you.

But, the key to all of this is to discover the true happiness that resides inside of you. It is a choice you must make to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances.

What would you do all day if you didn’t work?

I’m retired. I don’t work. I do whatever I want to. I make work I want to do, however, not that I didn’t enjoy my two careers. I do yard work, housework, answering questions here, writing, and doing art projects like woodworking.

Is it possible to gather the wisdom of all mankind to design a better, more reasonable, and more humane social system from the perspective of human nature to adapt to modern society, country, and all mankind?

It’s possible but very unlikely. Greed and personal freedom get in the way. 

What does it mean when someone says, “Timing is everything”?

It’s like saying, “Strike while the iron is hot.” You can’t jump the gun on many issues. You have to wait for the right time to start a project, bring up a subject, work on an issue, sign contracts, pull the lasagna out of the oven before it dries out, or go “all in” on a good poker hand. If your timing is off, it could screw up everything else. Loans could have higher percentages, rules might change and make things easier, the boss might be in a happier mood, and you might just have waited long enough to get the perfect poker hand.

“Right time, right place, right people equals success.

Wrong time, wrong place, wrong people equals most of the real human history.”

-- Idries Shah

Why do I feel like I’m stuck in one spot without progress?

What you’ve stated is true. If you’re not making progress, you are stuck in one spot. You are also asking the right question, “Why?” You need to ask this question of yourself, not us, and be painfully honest with your answers. More times than not, the problem is with some choice or decision you have made. You need to discover that choice or decision and correct it. I point you to the following article: The 5 Whys

What has made you lose complete respect for a person?

They had no sense of respect or good personal ethics.

Why do people relate to quotes more on social media than most other forms of posts?

In social media, public speaking, or writing an article or book, I find quotes as another way to drive home a point or increase understanding of where I’m coming from on a particular opinion or subject.

Will a married woman cheat again?

If she got anything out of it, I’d put money on it. The same goes for men.

How does forgiveness lead to happiness?

Unless you choose happiness always and in all things, this happiness will be fleeting, but, happiness nonetheless. Happiness is a choice. What ”leads” you to make this choice is a conscious effort on your part to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances.

“The truth is, unless you let go, unless you forgive yourself, unless you forgive the situation, unless you realize that the situation is over, you cannot move forward.”

-- Steve Maraboli

Do women in their 60s prefer big penises?

Women in their 60s probably are grateful for any size, just as the men in their 60s are grateful for the women preferring them.

What if in my 30s I am not proud of my studies?

Change your studies. You, probably, still have more than that many years left, in this existence. If you don’t finish them here, you can work on them in the next.

Within a year, I cut off my relationship with my deceitful sister and two close friends (who were using me), but my mother thinks my decision was too drastic and I may end up being alone. Isn’t being alone better than being with people who use you?

Indeed! I would choose to be alone in lieu of being used by others, especially your sister who will, most probably, come to regret alienating you. The bright side is that you have the chance to make better friends than the two “close” friends who seem not to be so.

Why can intuition generate a decision better than rational choice?

If “rational choice” is bad, intuition may give a better decision, but neither is guaranteed until you have an outcome that verifies the choice.

Why is forgiveness for me and not for the other person?

Forgiveness is universal. It is for everyone.

“People have to forgive. We don't have to like them, we don't have to be friends with them, we don't have to send them hearts in text messages, but we have to forgive them, to overlook, to forget. Because if we don't we are tying rocks to our feet, too much for our wings to carry!”

-- C. JoyBell C.

 

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as a chaplain at the regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com