Questioning Leaving, Anger, Pregnancy, Normalcy, Harassing, and Marriage

 

“You didn’t grow apart because you’re evil, but because you evolved. It’s life. It’s natural. It’s ok. Keep growing!”

-- Curtis Tyrone Jones

What do I do when my girlfriend of 6 years tells me she's leaving me?

“Have a good life!” Now, go and find someone who really loves you.

Why are people from villages unmannered, rude, corrupted, and unintelligent? What's the idea, or purpose, of having such a society?

They don’t know you. They aren’t, necessarily, corrupt, or unintelligent. You judge those who don’t know you, and you certainly don’t know them. With this attitude about villagers, I doubt that I would welcome you.

Reader comment:  Making aloooot of assumptions there buddy.  Lived in a village for 14 years. I have seen a lot of corrupted people. It's not that they don't know me, it's that they were scared of me knowing who they were.  Village is literally and I am saying literally like a ghetto.  You cannot imagine how many shady people are there in a village, it's really nuts.

My reply:  You have read into my answer, what you want to hear. I said, “They aren’t, necessarily, corrupt or unintelligent.”  I spent a bit of time overseas visiting villages, as part of military Intelligence, and found most of the people personable and anything but corrupt. You saw “a lot” of corrupted people. Were they all corrupt? Mine weren’t. You can not imagine how many normal people were in the villages I visited. I don’t make assumptions unless I state it. By the way, "a lot" doesn't have "four o's"... and it's two words. Just saying. 

How do I make peace with the fact that I hurt my girlfriend who ran off and got married to another man?

Talk to her and apologize for being an ass, and wish her many years of happiness.

I'm a complete failure should I kill myself?

Being a “complete” failure takes focus. Killing yourself will not make you any more than the failure you feel you are. Working toward being more than the "complete failure" you think you are is so much better use of your time. Look at it this way:  You have managed to work a computer to access this site. You have asked a question and you have judged yourself in the process. Perhaps you need to redefine “complete failure” before we go any further. You have some skills a “complete failure” wouldn’t have. Just saying.

What does every human being expect from a relationship? Why?

Happiness. If it is amorous, “true happiness” is in play.

What would be the impact on atheists if there were no religious people?

If there were no religious people, there would be no atheists. However, the majority use their atheism as a reason to pick a fight with religion. If there was no religion, they would find some other reason to be uncomfortable with any segment of the population. It is what they do.

“The difference between theism and nontheism is not whether one does or does not believe in God. . . Theism is a deep-seated conviction that there's some hand to hold: if we just do the right things, someone will appreciate us and take care of us. . . Nontheism is relaxing with the ambiguity and uncertainty of the present moment without reaching for anything to protect ourselves.”

-- Pema Chodron

Can a person get angry without any specific reason?

There are those people that are just angry, all the time.

Should I worry that my husband doesn't care how he hurts me or is not talking about our issues?

Yes. He has hurt you. How he hurts you is immaterial to the fact that he has hurt you. Divorce would be the next stage in your life. Or, you can continue to be hurt, and probably worse. He doesn’t care, remember?

Can a born-again believer commit the unpardonable sin?

The “unpardonable sin” sends them back to square one, again.

Why would a man stay married if he no longer loves his wife?

Children would be my guess. A man that sees a responsibility to his children, may not care about the woman that birthed them, as long as she is a dotting mother. If she isn’t, then the children will be a "line item" in the divorce proceedings.

Why did my ex give me money in a dream?

What is the context of the dream? Do you think he sees you as a whore?

How does it feel to be married to an unreasonably stupid wife?

She probably sleeps around, regardless of your support. The marriage is on the rocks, and the sooner you recognize it the better for both of you. Besides, you see her as “unreasonably stupid” which is not a loving quote you can build on. It is a miserable epitaph killing the marriage.

“Marrying a stupid person is a reflection of your thoughtlessness.”

-- Matshona Dhliwayo 

My wife got pregnant by another man in our marriage bed. What should I do? We have been married for 3 years.

Divorce her cheating ass. It won’t be the last time.

Why does stupidity make us angry?

Only if you keep asking the same question, ad nauseam… when it has already been answered.

7 Months after I discovered my wife's affair, I still want to confront my wife's affair partner, should I?

Get over it. It is your wife’s decision and you should have divorced her. She is a player, and she will probably “play” again. You are lacking something she really needs. Either find out from her what it is, get with the program, or divorce her. It is a choice.

My wife and I, are with my cousin’s brother, in our car. Who should sit in the back if I am driving in the car?

The cousin’s brother, unless you like to piss off your wife. 

I am 30 years old and unmarried. What should I do?

Have the sex of a lifetime, until you meet that special girl. This is silly. What do you think you should do if you haven’t met that special person? There is a partner for all of us, you simply haven’t found her yet, and you won’t if you don’t get your ass out there and play.

Reader comment: Agreed! My answer was going to be “Celebrate, “ lol.

My comment: The answer works for male or female. Just saying.

How can you claim to love all people, but, yet, you treat your wife like dirt?

Good question.

“If you do not listen to your wife, she will stop growing for you. She might grow for herself but not for you. This means that you will lose your wife because you have no investment in her life. To invest in someone's life means work.”

-- Orlando Alonso

Is it normal to cry when I see pictures of a dead identical twin brother, who died a month after childbirth?

You are more emotional than most people, but that is my opinion. Being more emotional doesn’t make you abnormal, it makes you more human. Nothing wrong with that.

Is pride in ignorance going to be worth it?

There is no pride in ignorance unless you are ignorant in pride.

What age, was for you, was the most funny and happy? And why?

I was happy up to high school and found most things funny. High school, on the other hand, was an eye-opener to reality. I almost didn’t graduate. High school was a bit more serious than I expected.

Why should rape be a crime?

You are taking something that hasn’t been given to you. It is stealing... a crime. I’d like to shoot the S.O.B. and save society the grief, but that would be murder… another crime.

What is the most common realization in all humans for other humans?

Almost nobody is truly happy.

Why is humblebragging seen as more disgusting and disgraceful than bragging itself?

Humblebragging? Someone wanted to make a word. Bragging is bragging. If you’re humble, you don’t brag. If you do, you are a braggart. Humblebragging… it is to laugh.

“Modern society doesn’t have a problem with treating the janitor the same as the CEO. We have a problem with our need to show the world that we treat the janitor the same as the CEO.”

-- Cic Mellace

What do I do if I accidentally cause a whole crowd of people online to harass me?

Change your name and start harassing yourself.

Did you ever fall in love in your life?

Yes, and we divorced.

What do all Trump haters have in common?

Socialism.

How should a born-again believer live?

With a humble heart.

Why did I do so many dumb things?

Uh… think about it.

What is wrong with having or dating older women?

Absolutely nothing. They can teach you much.

“Sleeping with a man half your age can be exhausting, but if it's too much for him you can always find a younger man.”

-- Barbara Taylor Bradford

I am 35 years old, yet, I’m not married and have no children. What should I do?

Get married and have children. This isn’t rocket science.

What should I do if my wife refuses to respect me?

Marriage is all about mutual respect. If she refuses to return the respect you show her, divorce is in the offing. Why did you marry someone that doesn’t show you the respect you show her? This isn’t a marriage… unless you enjoy being submissive.

What does a man do if his wife does not want sex?

Find another wife.

Can I take away my wife's women's rights if she does things that are against the rules of my house?

The rules of your house? Isn’t it her house, as well? Marriage is about being the best of friends and supporting each other. If this isn’t working out for you, get a divorce and find a woman who will be submissive to your every whim. You know, like a slave.

Do you need to take action to get a girlfriend even if you are attractive?

Unless you’re stuck up, it’s a good idea. Women will think you’ve been claimed already.

Is getting married at 18 a good idea, or should I wait until I am older?

Wait until you’re old enough to know what true love is really all about, like after college. Then wait another few years, to make sure the woman you want to marry knows what true love is all about. Then you can sit down with her and discuss marriage with her.

“If he’s not calling you, it’s because you are not on his mind. If he creates expectations for you, and then doesn’t follow through on little things, he will do same for big things. Be aware of this and realize that he’s okay with disappointing you. Don’t be with someone who doesn’t do what they say they’re going to do. If he’s choosing not to make a simple effort that would put you at ease and bring harmony to a recurring fight, then he doesn’t respect your feelings and needs. “Busy” is another word for “asshole.” “Asshole” is another word for the guy you’re dating. You deserve a f@#king phone call.”

-- Greg Behrendt

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com