Not my circus, not my monkey (Updated from 7/30/2015)

 

Question: "I would like to invite each of you to post your personal meditations and how you cope with life's stress. We could all benefit from your input."

-- Rev. Lynne Delgado

Best Answer: "How do I handle everyday stress? That's a great question! I try not to hold on to any negative energy... I find that if I repeat to myself,  "Not my circus, not my monkey." I keep calm!"

Lynne asked this question the other day on the minister's page of the monastery website.  I didn't see many responses, but I've been busy hanging the lattice surround under the new house and haven't checked back.  My choice of best answer, though, would have to go to Tracy with her, "Not my circus, not my monkey" comment, which I have included in its entirety.  It seems Tracy follows my philosophy.  Here is a woman who, I think, truly sees the value in not being responsible for everyone else's happiness.  "Not my circus, not my monkey."  My own answer reflected this same sentiment:

"Lynne, in answer to your query as to how we deal with life's stress, I stopped letting other people be in charge of my happiness and I have stopped being responsible for theirs, and I stopped having monetary debt. Why worry over that which you have no control? Why worry over that which you do? I think we need to let more stuff go in our lives. We carry around way too much baggage which we seem way too eager to share. Not having debt is a great way to own your own life. If you carry a balance on your credit card, full insurance on a vehicle you do not own outright, a mortgage, etc., you are someone's indentured servant and their plan is for you to never be free, which means never to be truly happy."

I will be spreading this new saying, as I think it simplifies the entire point of keeping other people's stress out of your own life and off of your path.  With everything going on in the world today that is of so much more importance than the trivial bullshit involved in the circus we visit upon ourselves, maybe we should all recognize, early on, that nothing is entertaining here. We need to learn to leave the "big top" when we see the monkey has set the tent ablaze.

My thought for this Sunday is to take stock of not only how we handle our stress, but of why we even allow this stress to occur. Stress is a choice, it is a choice each of us makes for our own lives, and it is proof that we are not the sharpest tools in the shed. It is one thing to buy a ticket to the sideshows in life, it is quite another to become part of the sideshow, much less become the star attraction.

There’s a Polish proverb which millennials often use today: “Not my circus, not my monkeys.” It’s a way of saying, “Don’t drag me into your drama and your issues—I’m not getting involved.”

-- Kirk Walden

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com