Questioning Happiness, Attitude, Anonymity, Personal, Heroes, and Contact

“Folks are usually about as happy as they make their minds up to be.”

-- Abraham Lincoln

 

 How can we live our lives with happiness?

It is a choice. Strive for true happiness always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances. 

To what extent does non-verbal communication propagate information?

If you’re sensitive to it, probably a lot. You need to be looking for it, though.

What are some events in your life where you faced a tremendous challenge of conflict between reason, faith-reason, and feeling or emotion?

First, there is no difference between my reasoning and the faith in my reasoning. Second, my feeling is a reflection of my emotion. There have been many events in my 70 years of life where I faced a tremendous challenge. I was brought up to work the challenge. So, I stand on the neck of my emotion and go about attacking the challenge. Sometimes, I fail. If I fail, I learn from the experience and try again until I get it right. Life, for many, is a tremendous challenge. Most people, however, seem to weather through it.

What did the people around you think about you when they first saw you in solitude?

It’s my "normal" self. They are used to seeing me so.

When children (ages 8-12) are caught in a lie, and they say they forgot, do you think they really forgot or is that an excuse for being caught in the lie?

Most of the time it is an excuse. Children are learning the lessons of true and false. Hopefully, they get it down pat before they reach adulthood. This doesn’t always happen, unfortunately. Sometimes, they never really get the hang of it.

Why do people sometimes say nothing when they have something to say?

They’re either shy or very careful of what they say.

“Freedom of speech does not protect you from the consequences of saying stupid shit.

-- Jim C. Hines

Why am I actually so cynical, judgmental, and have an attitude?

Your environment.

Can it be true that we don’t walk away to teach people a lesson, we walk away because we finally learned ours?

For me, this is true. I hate people who walk away, thinking this will teach a person a lesson. The person could care less, and will probably think less of you for doing it. Either teach the lesson or don’t. Walking away does nothing but piss people off. If I decide to walk away, it is because I finally learned my lesson to not try to teach the person who doesn’t want to learn, and I will explain my reasoning. I have more important things on my “to-do” list.

Author's comment: Beautifully said, thank you.

Do you know anyone with a mocking personality?

Nope. All of my friends are more mature than that.

How do we know if we’re truly thankful? Is thankfulness something we feel?

You will know if you’re thankful. If you aren’t being truly thankful, then you aren’t thankful at all. Being thankful is a feeling, and emotion that lets you know you have something to be thankful for. And, if you are truly thankful, you will give thanks to those that have helped you.

I threw a cactus at someone in my class because they annoyed me. Is this considered bullying?

Not at all. It’s considered stupid.

How do you deal with people who suffer from the smartest person in the room syndrome?

“Smartest person in the room” syndrome is driven by their ego. The best cure for an overactive ego is to slap it down. Prove the little prick isn’t the smartest person in the room. But, be certain you can, or you risk their ego becoming even bigger in the room.  

“More the knowledge, lesser the ego. Lesser the knowledge, more the ego.” 

-- Albert Einstein

What do you think about anonymous people on the internet?

The anonymous 23-year-old model who is, really, a 35-year-old fat guy in Chicago? I try to ignore them. Real people have no qualms about being real with you. They want nothing, need nothing, are not “anonymous” and simply want to talk.

Why is it common knowledge that most people on Earth are selfish?

Define “selfish.” I know some "selfish" people that are very giving. It depends.

What does it feel like to experience regret? If you ignore it, will it simply go away, or does it stay around?

“Regret” is a remembrance of a lesson learned. If you learned a lesson from something you did or didn’t do, you will be aware of it. You can try to ignore it, but if you learned a lesson, it will be very hard to ignore. And, if you admit you learned a lesson, it won’t simply “go away.” I learned a very valuable lesson after 25 years of marriage: Don’t ever do that again. I regret wasting those years of my life on a woman who admitted, in the end, that she never loved me. She gave me two great kids, but that’s where the marriage ended. I’ve had very few regrets, since. 

Is the concept of the polite society impossible in a free society?

Not if the “free” society learns to be polite. It is the concept.

What does it feel like to finally create your desired life?

My “desired life” was one where I didn’t want anything. I retired early because I attained that goal. I went to Mexico for a couple of years and returned at the behest of my prior employer. I have lived comfortably off of my military retirement and social security. But, again, I don’t want anything. I am a happy camper.

Generally speaking, are the Israelis truthful and courageous? What is Judaism all about?

Read “Auschwitz: A New History” by Laurence Rees. If you learn history you will learn to understand.

“If we bear all this suffering and if there are still Jews left, when it is over, then Jews, instead of being doomed, will be held up as an example.”

-- Anne Frank

Why do people ask so many personal questions?

Are you a beautiful woman?

Have you ever encountered situations or people who were "too clever by half," calculating to the point of jeopardizing relationships or lives?

I ran into these putzes all the time in the military. They thought they were so clever, but you almost had to sit on them to prevent them from screwing up a project. They want to be seen as “so clever” but, in reality, you have to know who they are before the damage is started.

Is there a spell to control my random bouts of maniacal laughter?

Bite your tongue, till it hurts. Or, you can cover your mouth with your hand. 

When is a person said to be immature?

When they don’t act mature. When they are mature, but, they still act like they're a child. This didn’t used to be an issue. Lately, however, due to bad parenting, or no parenting, children are growing up to be… well, children. They act immature. They have no concern for others, for businesses, for the rule of law, or life. Basically, they have no sense of responsibility.

What is the goal of technology and why is that?

To make life easier, discover new knowledge, and bring society forward.

When tackling a complex problem, do you prefer breaking it down into smaller, manageable tasks or approaching it with a more holistic strategy, and why?

I break it down, and if I have chalk and a blackboard, it's even better. The reason is part of the question. Breaking the complex problem into smaller, manageable tasks. It makes it easier to understand, schedule, and complete. If it's this complex, then trying to do all of this in your head is juggling failure. 

“When everyone says the same thing about some complex topic, what should come to your mind is, 'Wait a minute, nothing can be that simple, something's wrong.' That's the immediate light that should go off in your brain when you ever hear unanimity on some complex topic."

-- Noam Chomsky

Who is your favorite hero"?

James Bond. Always has been.

Why are people so dumb and why don’t people understand that actually becoming an adult has nothing to do with legally being one?

Adult: “A person who is fully grown or developed; behaves in a way characteristic of a responsible adult, especially by accomplishing mundane but necessary tasks.” If you meet the definition, then you are considered an adult, by definition.

When will things and life get better?

When you make them so. It is your life, and you are in charge of it. Your fate is in your own hands.

Why do I feel like my ideas aren't valid?

Who do you want your ideas to seem valid with? They are your ideas, not someone else’s, so you are the only one they need to be valid for. If you don’t see them as valid, then maybe they aren’t.

Did you know the Israeli proverb that says that if I don't steal it, someone else will?

It presupposes that all Israelis are thieves. I don’t see that as valid.

Why do most people seem extremely selfish, and don't even care at all about what is right and wrong?

Sounds like you hang with the wrong crowd. Maybe you should think about a better class of people you could be socializing with. Most people I hang out with are very concerned with doing what’s right, not what’s wrong. Just a thought.

“Wrong does not cease to be wrong because the majority share in it.”

-- Leo Tolstoy

What is the reason that no contact makes you miss someone more?

If you love someone deeply, you will always miss being with them. Love is my reason.

How do you differentiate someone who will never be unfair to anybody from the opposite kind of person? Aren't the words perfect and imperfect?

No one is “perfect.” The best we can hope for is excellence A person can be more excellent than another, but “perfection” is what it is, and nobody owns the top rung. Even God had to put guards at the gates of Eden. "Perfect" seems elusive.

Reader comment: You can not reach excellence but you can be perfect at least in character towards others. How do you describe someone who will never be unfair to another person?

My reply: Not excellent. Perfection does not exist. It is a concept.

What types of people are hard to manipulate?

People who are aware.

What would you say to your hound self regarding success?

“Strive to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances.” Success is only valid in life. Success is true happiness. It is a choice for our life. Everything else has to do with attaining goals, whereas happiness is a simple choice. Choose wisely.

Do religious people believe that morality exists?

Uh… isn’t that the reason for most religions? To live a good and moral life? Atheists can do this, as well. 

How do atheists deal with the fact that the ratio of Christian geniuses to atheist geniuses is something like 16:4?

Something like? That's not very scientific.  It could be more like 8:4, or 4:10. As a Christian I don't think that spirituality has anything to do with being a genius.  I think the number of theists in the world, probably outnumber the atheists. It makes more sense.

“When we are locked up between a mood of 'transparency' and a feel of 'discretion,' we must clear up our mental muddle, until we find the "golden ratio," and recognize the peak of 'candor.' By hitting the point of recognition and enlightenment, we can make a correct choice and follow the right track ("Unfulfilled meeting")”

-- Erik Pevernagie

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com