Questioning Fun, Cheating, Anger, Lying, Balls, and Sex

 

“Biffi said it was more American on an air force base in Crete than it was in Times Square.”

-- Cathleen Schine

 

Did hanging out with friends often in your early and mid-20s make you think that life in your 20s is fun? 

I was in the Air Force. I had a great group of friends. Life in my 20s was exceptional fun.

Can people think about questions they don't know the answer to?

I do. But, then, I’m a bit strange when it comes to knowledge. I find myself reading a lot. Physics, philosophy, religion, poems, and the like. I was never a very good student, because they never taught me what I wanted to learn.

What does this quote by Albert Einstein mean to you? “Don’t listen to the person who has the answers, listen to the person who has the questions.”

The answers are known and already in play. The questions are what we need answers to.

Why do people laugh and not take me seriously when I call myself ugly? I know for sure I’m not good-looking.

Maybe they think you’re kidding. Or, maybe you made them uncomfortable, and they’re trying to lighten the mood. This would be my ploy.

What's the one travel essential you've discovered that you can't live without?

A razor.

What is your favorite quote? Why?

Try this, because it's true:

"No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it's not the same river and he's not the same man."

-- Heraclitus

I suspect my BF is cheating by his actions, gestures, responses, lies, etc., but I can't find any hard proof. What can I do?

What can you do? It is your life! Your BF is lying to you? Whether he is cheating or not, lying would put him out the door. Start with that.

How do I stop feeling stressed and upset?

Feeling stressed and upset is usually due to someone making you feel this way. The obvious cure is to ignore the cause. Is it your life, or theirs? Do they have the right to make your life miserable? I stopped being stressed and upset when my marriage ended. A big “wake-up call” for me.

Strive to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances. You need to live your life, not someone else’s “opinion” of what your life should be. 

What are some of the meanest ways to prank someone?

Why does it have to be mean? Sooner or later someone will get hurt, or die, and the prankster will go to jail. Good aspiration for an intelligent person. So, let’s go with that.

Should I get nose surgury? (I'm totally confident & have no problem with that, just to look better.)

You should learn to spell “surgery” before you consider doing it. If you think you’ll look better, maybe you should consider it. But, considering it and doing it are two separate things. One, things can go awfully wrong. Two, you need to pay big dollars for a top-notch surgeon. I’ve been going bald for years. Hair implants? I continue, to this day, to go bald until I die. Why? Because it isn’t who I am, it is what I am, and the ladies seem to love me.

I am a 70-year-old man who has never had a problem getting the ladies. Why? Again, it isn’t who I am. Who I am is who the ladies like, and what I am, balding, is so unimportant. I don’t judge the ladies, and I don’t expect them to judge me. Be fun and have fun, and don’t worry about your looks. Be clean, groom yourself, dress to kill, and go have some fun.

How do we know when to change our opinions?

When you find out that your opinion, and the facts backing it, simply suck.

Why do you think that others want to be around you if you don't like being around other people?

I’m just likable. Husbands, not so much. Women need to hug and men roll their eyes. I’m satisfied sitting by myself, in a chair on the porch of the cigar bar, watching the parade of humanity flow on by.

“Let me tell you this: if you meet a loner, no matter what they tell you, it's not because they enjoy solitude. It's because they have tried to blend into the world before, and people continue to disappoint them.”

-- Jodi Picoult

Is it normal to not take other people's anger seriously?

If they are angry for a reason that you provided, not taking them seriously will just set them off. If they’re angry at someone else, make sure they aim at the right target and not at you. If it isn’t you, try to calm them down so they can see a better picture of the situation. A calm demeanor can calm a savage heart.

When should one stop having debates or arguments with other people?

Immediately. Opening your mouth might make you sound like a fool. Speaking will remove all doubt. Better to be humble, smiling at other people’s stupidity.

Why does life in your 30's sound so boring to me? Why does it seem like life could never be as fun in your 30s as it was in your 20s if you had a good social life in your 20s?

Because, in your 30s you are getting used to responsibility, and responsibility is boring. When you hit the 40s, you are dabbling in cruise control. In the 50s you have mastered it, and in your 60s you are applying the brakes. 

How do I lead my girlfriend properly?

First, you don’t ever “lead” your girlfriend, you guide her. Second, you practice being polite. You can disagree, but you never argue. Third, you do what she wants to do when you’re with her. If you want to do something, ask her. If she doesn’t want to do it, that’s why God made “me” time. A woman is a doll taking your hand or your arm… because she wants to. Treat her like porcelain, not like a puppy. She expects a pedestal, not a pit of misery. Wrap your mind around it. This is life.

Or, she can cut your balls off. Your choice.

How do you handle an argumentative and stubborn partner who never admits his mistakes?

Find a new partner. Sex, contrary to popular belief, isn’t everything. Love is. 

How do you deal with "church" people who are constantly complaining?

This is the problem with organized religion. “Church” people should be taking a page from the “Jesus” book. Complaining either gets one labeled as a complainer or gets them nowhere. Life is what it is until you make it something else. If you can’t change the music, learn to dance to it. If you don’t want to learn new dances, you have the freedom to leave and find more agreeable digs. I find complaining simply irritating, and if they don’t leave I’ll move the party somewhere else and not tell them.

“Don’t complain against life, it may hear you and double your suffering”

-- Bangambiki Habyarimana

How would you deal with a wife who is always lying? 

I divorced mine, after 25 years of it.

 What would cause someone to be both intelligent and a fool?

A big mouth. Someone who talks too much about things they should be keeping close to the vest.

How do you cope when ten minutes after a joke has been said, you get the joke and want to laugh very loudly, but it would be inappropriate to laugh at that moment?

I can’t help but try to stifle the laugh. I’m going to laugh, I just can’t help it.

How do you deal with a person who is part of a group of friends who always bullies everyone to do what that person wants?

Walk away from them. Bullies are immature children who will go down or be killed. You don’t want to be around when either happens. Walk away and find a new group of friends.

What do I do when my wife forbids me to masturbate?

What is she doing to make up for it?

Why do we have to be nice to men that we don’t respect?

You don’t unless you work for them. And, if you work for them, you are showing respect to the office they hold, not the person they think they are.

“Even if you cannot change all the people around you, you can change the people you choose to be around. Life is too short to waste your time on people who don’t respect, appreciate, and value you. Spend your life with people who make you smile, laugh, and feel loved.”

-- Roy T. Bennett

Is a guy with balls a girl?

Nope. And it doesn’t matter how much they want to be, either.

What does it say about a person’s intelligence when they can’t answer a very simple yes or not question with an honest yes or no answer?

Well, my intelligence dropped a tad when I tried to figure out what a “yes and not” question was. It seems to me that you can only answer with either a yes or not answer. So, I’m not going to touch this one.

Why is it so hard to get a young girl for an older guy?

Who spread that fallacy?

To what extent if many people seem to misunderstand a question and give what they imagine to be a fair answer is it the problem with the wording of the question?

It is either the wording, the lack of context, or the intelligence of the audience. I’d be willing to think the audience is intelligent enough. It usually is the fault of the wording or not enough context.

How do you interpret Rep. George Santos' comments about his colleagues having sex with lobbyists?

No one will satisfy his sexual longings, so jealousy loosened his quivering lips.

What do you do when someone falsely accuses you of being manipulative or controlling?

They are falsely accusing me. I am anything but manipulative and controlling. I just laugh and tell them to buy me a beer and kiss my ring.

“You are a manipulator. I like to think of myself more as an outcome engineer.”

-- J.R. Ward

I met a younger man online. We have not met, but he has been texting me for about a month.  He’s looking for sex. What do I do? 

What do you do? If you’re not looking for sex, tell him no. This is your choice, not his. If you’re looking to have some fun, ride him all night till he’ll need Vaseline Intensive Care Lotion for a couple of weeks. That’ll teach him. It taught me.

Are atheists exceptionally intelligent for thinking when a person dies they're dead forever?

Unfortunately, it does nothing to explain the paranormal occurrences around the world. 

What is the definition of atheism? Do atheists tend to be humble?

Basically, they do not believe in deities. It has not been my pleasure to have an intelligent conversation with an atheist, nor has it been my pleasure to witness them being humble. They drag you into the gutter, in short order, along with their language.

Understand that I am spiritual, and not a believer in “organized” religion. But, I do believe in the omnipotent power of a “God,” creator of all things. This might very well be the description that states, “He was, is now, and ever shall be, a world without end.” This, for me, is the description of omnipotent energy, the creator of all things.

I think my wife is turning asexual after 11 years of marriage. Should I re-marry?

This is something you need to discuss with her.

What causes a person to be too honest?

You are either honest or you’re not. There isn’t such a thing as “kind of honest.” “kind of” was the reason “confession” was developed. You could confess that you weren’t as honest as you were supposed to be.

Did you notice that half the time when we judge others, we are actually judging ourselves for the same thing without realizing it (unless we later realize we are being a hypocrite)?

Personally, I think it happens more than half the time.

“People that have trust issues only need to look in the mirror. There they will meet the one person that will betray them the most.”

-- Shannon L. Alder

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com