Questions of Flirting, Negativity, Relations, and Faith

“Flirting is a promise of sexual intercourse without a guarantee.”

-- Milan Kundera

What is a behavior that confident and self-assured people do not exhibit?

Second-guessing themselves.

I just got brutally dumped. I still have all of his stuff and he hasn’t asked for any of it back yet or even mentioned it. Why is that?

He probably thinks you’ve burned it all. Perhaps you should.

What is life without motivation?

Boring.

“Ever have a day when you wonder what, if anything, is worth doing? Forget about doing anything well: I’m talking about simply meeting basic standards.”

-- Gina Barreca

If you were extremely wealthy, would you let your spouse have it their own way with their high consumerist habits using your money?

I wasn’t wealthy, and my wife did it anyway. She was saddled with her debt in the divorce.

Should you visit somebody who may not be happy to see you?

I can’t see a point to this. A phone call would be a less intrusive way of finding out if a visit would be worth the time and effort.

Have negative people called you stupid, mean, ignorant, and/or arrogant by blaming you?

Oh, my, yes! That group of malcontents I humorously refer to as the League of the Perpetually Offended, usually get so worked up that they, unwittingly end up agreeing with me. They evidence no cogent arguments, and they usually launch immediately into colorful language that would make even the lowbrow amongst us blush. I jokingly plead for them to stop helping me.

“It amazes me when education, religion, and family values fail to create a human being.”

-- Anum Sattar

Do you think writing is an art, a skill, and a great knowledge enhancer?

Having written two novels for my own enjoyment, I can tell you it is all of that and so much more.

What is something outside of work/school that you are really proud of?

My children, both of whom have followed their chosen paths.

Do I need intelligent rich girlfriends?

The minute you asked this question, you were taken off the dance cards of most of the intelligent wealthy women.

"Remember, it's as easy to marry a rich woman as a poor woman."

-- William Makepeace Thackeray

I need help figuring what is going on with my body. What should I do?

Go see a medical professional.

My crush told me to get her a boyfriend. What do I say to that? I obviously have a crush on her.

Tell her, “Looking for a boyfriend? Here I am!” You’ll, almost immediately, know where you stand.

Reader comment: This, is pretty good advice.

How do I stop feeling like a burden to everyone?

Stop being a burden. You must know what you’re doing if you feel like you’re a burden, so stop doing what makes you feel that way. If you truly don’t know what you’re doing, try asking one or two of the people you feel like you’re being a burden to.

“The bars on our cage are of our own making.”

-- Jessie Burton

If you could go back in time and tell your younger self one piece of information, what would it be and why? How would this alter your timeline and the world as a whole?

“Put everything you earn into Microsoft stock, then sit back and wait about 20 years.” I lead a fairly austere life, so it really won’t change much in my humble existence. If I don’t make ripples the world won’t feel anything at all. I will be on a beach with a foo-foo drink in my hand and no one will be the wiser.

What would you do if your partner suddenly began making excuses to avoid making love and you were feeling hurt and rejected?

I’d ask who they’re seeing and what STD they’ve contracted. This will get the conversation flowing.

Is it normal for a 22-year-old to live with their parents?

If they’re still in school, probably. Other circumstances can come into play, as well. But, for the most part, they need to move their dead ass out, get a job, and grow the hell up. None of this will happen if they keep leeching off of mommy and daddy.

"Accepting parenting advice from parents whose kid is still living in their basement with no job is stupider than putting honey on your hand and letting a bear lick it off."

-- Unknown

If you could flip a switch so your children never existed and you never knew them, would you flip it?

Not on a bet. They are better than their mother or I ever were.

My oldest sister hates me no matter how nice I am to her (the nicest) but loves my other siblings. Why does this affect me so much?

She’s family, and she’s acting like an ass specifically to you. Why? The best way to answer this question is to call her down on it in front of the rest of the family. Hold her feet to the fire, so to speak, and make her explain herself. She’ll be pissed, but she’ll also learn not only that you care, but of what you're capable of when pushed into a corner by her immature antics.

Is a secret relationship good for the future or not?

Not if you’re juggling relationships. Sooner or later, every juggler drops a ball. This is when the real show begins. 

"To keep your secret is wisdom, but to expect others to keep it is folly."

-- Unknown 

How do you feel about women who flirt with married men or men in a relationship, and break up the relationship?

Tarts will be tarts, can’t live with or without them, They make life interesting. But, it doesn’t say much for the men or the relationships the men are in if they allow the tart to damage it.

What are some reasons why someone should switch from a desktop computer to a laptop?

Portability. I wrote two novels, and I liked writing in coffee houses and bars. Hard to do if you can’t bring the computer with you. I’m contemplating a third novel, but I’ve upsized my laptop, I’m thinking about getting a smaller unit so it’s easier to take around. 

Should I believe before it’s too late?

You must decide this for yourself, no one can decide for you. Is there life beyond the veil of death, or has this all been for nothing but our own amusement? Is there a supreme power in the universe, or was this all just by chance?

God, or no God? This is the question we struggle with because there is no proof either way. But, the believers on both sides have faith that they are right. One side believes when you die, that’s it. The other side believes when you die, there is an afterlife. Both sides have faith, but only one, if right, will reap the reward of life after death.

Should you believe? The downside is you simply die. The upside is life after death. just give up, or go for it. 50/50. Personally, I like the odds.

“Do not be conformed to this world, but be transformed by the renewal of your mind”

-- Romans 12:2

How do you know if you truly want input from others?

If I want their input, I will ask for it.

What happens when you stop keeping things?

The mess in the house diminishes. I have a small house, so keeping too many things creates a “where to put it all” problem.

What can you do to be happy when things are down or not going well for you?

This, too, shall pass. Life is full of ups and downs, so if you’re in a slump you will, probably, soon be out of it.

The “downs” are akin to failure, and failure is nothing more than an opportunity to learn. Ask why things are down or not going well. Critique the problem, learn from what you find, and be prepared for it when it comes round again. I strive to be happy at all times and in all things.

“There is strange comfort in knowing that no matter what happens today, the Sun will rise again tomorrow.”

-- Aaron Lauritsen

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as a chaplain at the regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com