Questioning Love, Life, Thyself, Thought, and Fear

 

“Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves.”

-- Carl Gustav

Can you have both self-love and love for others?

If you can’t truly love yourself, how do you expect to truly love others?

Is someone completely responsible for their success? Why are outcomes so different for people? Do you need to be born wealthy to be successful? Is being wealthy successful?

First of all, success in life is being truly happy. What you are discussing is attaining goals. In order to attain anything, you must make the right decisions and choices. If anything is handed to us on a proverbial silver platter, we won’t appreciate it as much as we would if we had to work our ass off for it.

Being handed wealth is only sustainable if you were made to work for the wealth you were handed. Basically, if you don’t know how to sustain the wealth you’re given, you won’t have the wealth very long. Being wealthy can be a blessing, a curse, or both.

Better we should make the personal choice to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of our circumstances.

Why would a person not be self-aware?

A coma? 

What are some good and some bad things associated with the number 3?

Three people in the same bed can be good… or bad. A romantic date should never include a third wheel. Have a “wingman,” not “wingmen,” when out on the town. Meals should have at least three courses. Decisions should have at least three choices - this, that, or the other. Coming in “third” at least gets you the bronze medal, which is so much better than a “participation” award. 

Which religious teaching brings peace of mind?

It is more of a philosophy of life, but Zen or Taoism always brings me peace. 

"Much of the philosophy of religious education has been based upon a false premise, and perhaps many have missed the essence of Christian experience, having had religious training take its place." 

-- Billy Graham

When you realize you can't afford life, how did you deal with it?

I laughed, and then I redefined my life. I downsized, got out from under debt, learned to live within my means, and also learned to be truly happy with less. This is how I discovered to choose happiness over misery. Now I strive to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of my circumstances. I stay out of debt, live a simple and humble life, and have learned to be truly happy with what this humble life brings me.

Is it possible to love yourself and not others?

Yeah, but it’s awfully selfish and conceited. 

How true is it that the six basic fears become translated into a state of worry through indecision?

It won’t take six fears to create a state of worry due to indecision. The simple fear of not being able to decide whether to have protected sex should create that state for most smart people. The fear of breaking the law. The fear of being caught by the husband while having the sex of a lifetime with his wife. Any “fear” of bad consequences should make someone think twice about what they’re thinking of doing. I only know of one basic fear, and that one’s called - fear. It sounds like someone is making this more complicated than it has to be.

What is the most important tool a human being has?

Desire. 

Isn't it the thought that selfishness is a bad thing still out of selfishness? 

Only if you do it for some reward other than simply choosing to be selfless. Being selfless is its own reward. If it is selfish to feel good about doing good, without anybody knowing you’re doing it, there is something wrong. If you do it so others notice, that would be selfish. 

“The world says: "You have needs -- satisfy them. You have as much right as the rich and the mighty. Don't hesitate to satisfy your needs; indeed, expand your needs and demand more." This is the worldly doctrine of today. And they believe that this is freedom. The result for the rich is isolation and suicide, for the poor, envy and murder.”

-- Fyodor Dostoyevsky

What is winning?

Attaining a goal.

Are you proud of your intelligence level?

I could have done better, but I rated top 10% in the Air Force which garnered me a slot with the Intelligence Division. I think it had to do with me finding fault with a couple of questions on an exam. I’m not really that intelligent, but I seem to be that smart. I’m not the sharpest tool in the shed, but it is amazing what you can accomplish with a dull plastic butter knife from McDonald’s. 

What is the philosophy of finding thyself?

Looking. 

How do I become less self-critical?

Stop performing introspection. I critique myself all the time, but you have to take what you learn as a “learning” experience. If you use it to berate yourself you will never move forward as anything more than a bundle of nerves. Critique, learn, and move on. Try not to make the same mistakes more than twice.

What is an uncertain future?

I’m not certain.

"To be hopeful means to be uncertain about the future, to be tender toward possibilities, to be dedicated to change all the way down to the bottom of your heart."

-- Rebecca Solnit

What is something that "holds its value" really well?

Gold.

How do you increase the impact of your ideas?

Be very right before you open your pie hole, and then be able to prove it. Ideas only have a true impact if they are correct. But, one “aw shit” has the ability to set you back to the beginning.

What is more powerful than power and glory?

Knowledge.

Why is it important to think?

“Cogito ergo sum.” — René Descartes

“I think therefore I am.” If you don’t think, what are you, 1st base? In a coma? The mere process of thinking defines you as a living entity and one capable of thought. Just being alive does not define you to yourself. The ability to think, however, does.

What are the problems that we need as humans to solve for a better life?

We don’t “need” any more problems as humans. What we need are more solutions.

"Sometimes the easiest way to solve a problem is to stop participating in the problem."

-- Albert Einstein

Do you consider yourself to be normal? Why or why not?

I consider myself a deviant and a self-proclaimed hypocrite, but I am humble to a fault.

Author comment:  Sounds kinda honest, and illustrative to the point. Thanks. Can I ask you who's norms you deviate from? Just curious.

My reply:  I majored in Psychology before I joined Air Force Intelligence. I took a course called “The Psychology of Deviant Behavior.” I had no idea people were studying me. 

I want to become a moral person. What is a good book that will make me a proper moral person?

Start with the “Tao Te Ching” by Lao Tsu. 

Let's say I used to enjoy learning a skill but after an incident where someone decided to make fun of it. Now, I'm learning out of spite and not enjoying it, constantly doubting myself. How do I regain the enjoyment I once had?

Learn to ignore dumbasses who poke fun due to their own psychological shortcomings. People say hurtful shit because they, themselves, are wanting. Rise above them.

If you could ask only one question of a person you perceive to be successful, what would it be, and how should you ask it?

Look them straight in the eye and ask, “How can a person be so exceptional?”

Are humans meant to encounter all the six basic fears?

Unless you absolutely don’t really give a shit, or you’re a walking slab of concrete, I’d say you’re going to give each one their due, sometime in life.

“Our deepest fear is not that we are inadequate. Our deepest fear is that we are powerful beyond measure. It is our light, not our darkness that most frightens us. We ask ourselves, 'Who am I to be brilliant, gorgeous, talented, fabulous?' Actually, who are you not to be? You are a child of God. Your playing small does not serve the world. There is nothing enlightened about shrinking so that other people won't feel insecure around you. We are all meant to shine, as children do. We were born to make manifest the glory of God that is within us. It's not just in some of us; it's in everyone. And as we let our own light shine, we unconsciously give other people permission to do the same. As we are liberated from our own fear, our presence automatically liberates others.”

-- Marianne Williamson

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com