Questioning Success... Again

 

Great people didn't take care of their "social circle", so, is social interaction really important? To what extent?

If they didn’t take care of “their social circle” we must ascertain if they are truly happy with the consequences of their life. Many times, our social circle is comprised of those who help us move forward. They are owed, at least, a modicum of gratitude for their support. If the "great" show no gratitude, what does that say of greatness? The fact this question makes it sound as if their “social circle” is a thing of their past, would not be surprising.

Social interaction is important. Networking is important. Recognizing those who help us move forward, and thanking them for their effort, is also very important. In this way, the “great people” now become the mentoring force in their universe.

Why is 'knowing things' not always 'doing things'?

Insider information on a stock could make you millions of dollars, but the jail time when you’re convicted of “insider trading” prevents you from doing it.

Why does the past eat at us so much?

Our inability to let it go and move on. We dwell on our mistakes, even though we can do nothing but mitigate the results in the present and learn from what happened so we don’t make the same mistakes again. We kick ourselves for failures, not realizing that failure is one of the best ways we learn lessons, as long as we critique what we did wrong. We need to learn to let go of the past and pay more attention to the present. The choices and decisions we make now will have a great effect on what happens in the next moment. Learn to make good ones.

“My past made me a stronger and wiser person because I learned from its valuable lessons without dwelling on regrets and excuses.”

-- Edmond Mbiaka, self-help writer

What is a list of things on which you count your success and prosperity?

Great jobs, economy, attitude, job, support, and a lack of significant debt. 

What affected your vibe today?

Having to remove the green bell peppers from my prime beef marinara sauce. I can use the peppers for flavoring but the cooked peppers make my girlfriend urpy. I quickly recovered, though, by layering them in a shallow casserole dish with two kinds of cheese. Baked at 350, it will make great pepper sandwiches.

What are the products/items that cannot be advertised?

The selling of sexual favors. It is illegal in most states. 

When did you discover your aim?

When I joined the military. My aim was to stay in for 20 years, get out and do 20 years with another company, and then retire, for the second time, at 60. It worked out as planned, though I would have continued working if my father didn’t have a stroke.

“Vulnerable, like all men, to the temptations of arrogance, of which intellectual pride is the worst, he [the scientist] must nevertheless remain sincere and modest, if only because his studies constantly bring home to him that, compared with the gigantic aims of science, his own contribution, no matter how important, is only a drop in the ocean of truth.”

― Louis de Broglie (1892-1987), physicist

Are we great?

I don’t know if we’re great, but I am absolutely great! But, then, I am a legend in my own mind.

Would you rather live in a huge home and be house poor or live in a modest home and have a lot of expendable money?

One has little to do with the other for me. I hate large houses as they take too much work to keep up. Being a humble man with few wants, the simple home is fine for me, regardless of how much I make. “Expendable” money simply goes into the bank in case of emergencies. For instance, I keep $5000 off to the side just to cover my end of catastrophic medical, and then insurance covers the rest.

What are the greatest benefits or advantages that the wealthy have, besides money?

If they’ve planned right, they don’t have to worry about anything except being really happy, which money can’t buy them.

"To be truly rich is to possess the means of realizing in big ways one's little whims and fantasies and sicknesses...."

-- C. Wright Mills (1916-1962), sociologist

What can you say to counter "money does not buy happiness"?

You can say much, but it will be empty. Money does buy “happiness,” but it doesn’t buy real happiness. Real happiness exists even in the absence of anything else.

Is there a place and a time you would love to have lived in the past, and why?

Knowing what I know now, nope. The past had poor personal hygiene, bad sewers (if any), no toilet paper, food quality was questionable, yadda, yadda, yadda. Ever been around someone who constantly smelled like ass or armpit? Ever had the desire to live on jerky, hardtack, and water that might give you dysentery? You had an opportunity to die at any moment for any number of sad reasons besides accidents. Is it any wonder the life span was so short for the majority? Nope. I’m fine right here.

If one seeks and does not find, what went wrong?

They were looking in the wrong place.

"What you seek is seeking you."

-- Rumi Jalāl ad-Dīn Muhammad Rūmī (1207-1273), poet, Islamic scholar, theologian

How do you feel about the fact that you are not in control of your destiny and that your fate is not in your hands?

I am so in control of my desired destiny, but my fate, the reality of it, is in the hands of God. My desired destiny is to die a happy old man, but how old I become is in the hands of the Creator.

How much do you think luck played a part in your success?

About 30%. I’ve always been one to take chances, but not so much with my success. Having said this, when you’re up against others is testing for a position, variables do come into play. Awards and decorations, time in service, performance reports, visibility, all have a bearing and all depend on who is still in the business, the awards they may have gotten, how good they were at their job, etc.

What does it mean to be haunted by your mistakes?

You’re still dwelling on them; you just can’t let go. What has happened is in the past. There is little to nothing you can do about it. Remember it, but don’t dwell on it. Learn from your mistakes, so you don’t repeat them, and move forward. How much attention you pay to your choices and decisions in the present moment has more bearing on what may happen in the next than dwelling in the past.

There’s no better way to release the past than to refuse to dwell on it. And the best way to refrain from dwelling on the past is to keep your attention firmly focused on the present. When you find yourself thinking about the past, ask yourself the following question: “Where am I right now?” This will bring your attention back to the present moment. 

"The only reason that your past is still haunting you is because you keep it alive in your mind by thinking about it. However, if your mind is filled with the present, there’s no room left in it for the past."

-- Marelisa Fabrega, lawyer, entrepreneur

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteers as a chaplain at the regional medical center.