Questioning Perfection?

 

Is everything in this universe “winner takes all”?

That would depend on your definitions of “winner” and “all” are. It also depends on the selfishness or selflessness of the “winner” being discussed. I consider myself a humble “winner” in life. I want for nothing because I live a simple life, and I strive to be happy always. I wish for everyone to be in the position I’m in, so I don’t want it “all” if I want others to partake. “Winner takes all” is a saying based on greed, not on humble selflessness.

What can I do to become unique?

Be yourself. Almost everyone is trying to be someone else. What we refuse to embrace is our own uniqueness; to be satisfied with who we are.

Is it normal to be 19 and have most of your future planned out? I have been planning out my future since my junior year of high school, but most teens don’t even have an idea of what they want to do.

No, it isn’t normal. Your mature approach to this is unusual, and I applaud it. I’ll assume you are very intelligent, but remember to also be smart and strive to be happy always while on your path. This combination will certainly get you where you want to be, and if it doesn’t… you’ll still be happy always.

“By failing to prepare, you are preparing to fail.”

-- Benjamin Franklin (1706-1790), polymath

In reality, the ideal is only in the mind. Someone like you is very ideal and would sometimes get frustrated or feel disillusioned when your ideals are not realized. Have you experienced this? What will you do?

In “reality” one’s “ideal’ is not “only in the mind.” An ideal can come to fruition if one wants it enough.

Let’s consider the definitions: Satisfying one's conception of what is perfect; most suitable. Existing only in the imagination; desirable or perfect but not likely to become a reality.

Your “ideal” is your own conception of what is perfect since nothing is perfect. So we make our ideal what is most suitable. Our “ideal” does exist only in our imagination until we make it our reality. How much effort we put into this outcome dictates how likely it is to become reality.

I do get frustrated at my own failure to make an ideal a reality. My frustration doesn't last very long, however, as I am usually back at it in short order or on to the next issue. Better that we strive to be happy always and not be too concerned with ideals.

What creates a good life?

Happiness. Learn to be happy always.

It's been 3 months since I started working. Sometimes I do really stupid mistakes. Some days I am very good and some days bad. I judge myself a lot. I want to be just good. My view of myself is blocking the way. Any advice?

I’d start by saying everything you just said, to your boss. Let them know you are looking for and will accept guidance. They’ll probably put you on the road to being more than “just good,” and your view of yourself will definitely change.

“One of the basic rules of the universe is that nothing is perfect. Perfection simply doesn't exist.....Without imperfection, neither you nor I would exist”

-- Stephen Hawking (1942-2018), theoretical phycisist, cosmologist

What is the opposite of “took”?

Gave. 

How do I tell the person I love all the problems in my life without them walking away from me?

Don’t. What makes you think they want your drama? Tell them you have drama, and if they want to hear it they’ll ask. If they ask, tell them in short “bullets” and don’t make War & Peace out of it.  What you really need to do is get shed of all the drama, the probems you feel people will walk away from you for.  Life is about striving to be happy, not keeping drama alive and wallowing in pit of self-pity.

How do you not feel guilty when you're full?

Want, more than anything else, to be fat. Otherwise, guilt is what you pay for gluttony.

“Oh, pity the poor glutton
Whose troubles all begin
In struggling on and on to turn
What's out into what's in.”

-- Walter de la Mare (1873-1956). poet, writer, novelist

I'm scared because I said too much secretive stuff to my friends and now we’re enemies. I think they're going to expose me. What should I do?

If they “out” you, they out you, not much to do about it but grin and bear it. Whatever it is they know, learn a lesson from this: No one is that trustworthy. Learn to hold your tongue and keep secrets... well, secret. What you do now is grow some broad shoulders and let all the crap coming your way roll off of them. Your enemies don’t need the satisfaction of watching you squirm, so don’t give it to them. Man up and take it. So what? It isn’t like it's going to kill you. 

I said I hate my ex-narcissist ex and blocked him (because he hurts me). Why is he still texting me?

Okay, this is so easy. Because he’s still a narcissist. Is he the one who told you he wasn’t?

Is 30 too late for a woman to start over and succeed in life? Career/business/relationships?

Nope, not if you learned something from your past. Now, let the past go and keep what you learned in front of you as you rebuild your life and start over. Pat attention to now because now is how you build your future.

“Who told you it was too late? And more importantly, why did you choose to believe them?”

-- Richelle E. Goodrich, author

What is the answer to the question, "Where do you live now"?

On the edge of the abyss at the cusp of infinity. This is where the Semi-Ancient Pie Hole Philosopher comes up with all the quasi-wisdom. If you stare into the abyss long enough it stares back. When this happens I just smile and spit in its eye. 

What's the world's most dangerous answer?

No.

Is there anything someone said to you that was really heartwarming?

Two small children came up to me in the store one day, smiled, and said in unison, “Thank you for your service!” Their mom was beaming and I was so touched.

Is it more natural to be created or to be born?

I could be wrong, but this is my take: Rocks are created, living things are born. In this context, both are natural processes. However, when we create something natural through artificial means it doesn’t really meet the criteria for a “natural” process. A “man-made” diamond is a diamond but not a natural one. Natural diamonds have flaws, whereas man-made diamonds are virtually flawless.

“The truth is, immigrants tend to be more American than people born here.”

-- Chuck Palahniuk, journalist, novelist

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteers as a chaplain at the regional medical center.