Questioning Ugly, Meaning, Rules, Luck, and Stars

"Beauty in things exists merely in the mind which contemplates them."

-- David Hume

Is it normal that I've never found someone "ugly"?

You're not looking hard enough.  I have, but they have found that having a good personality makes up for a lot of crap, so we look beyond the visual sense. As “beauty” is in the eye of the beholder, “ugly” is in the mind of the beholder. Most people just can’t move beyond what they see. It takes up residence in their mind.

Having said this, I have seen some very attractive people act so ugly that it becomes seriously embarrassing to include them as humans.

Is it bad when you are overly humble and people are complaining about it?

There is nothing wrong with humility, and the “complainers” should exercise some of it. I have no patience for whiners and complainers. They are, at best, a roadblock to progress.

What does "we make our own choices" mean?

If someone makes a choice for you, and you accept it, you have, by proxy, made the choice. If you let someone make all your choices for you, that is your choice to do so. If you do not balk at them making your choices, that is, also, your choice.

Everything we do in life is a choice or a decision. Living is your choice, because suicide, in most instances, is cowardly and sucks, but suicide is also your choice. Nobody makes you do it. You might be driven, by someone or something, to make the decision to commit suicide, but the decision is still yours.

When we try to solve problems in our lives, the “why” we find is most times, ourselves. We made a choice or decision.

What is worse than losing?

Cheating.

Why does someone not stop justifying a wrong/immoral action they have done?

Because it would make them look bad if they admitted it. To quote the Bard of Avon, "The lady doth protest too much, methinks." There comes a time when people start to see the real truth through all of their denials.

“I never made a mistake in my life; at least, never one that I couldn't explain away afterward.”

-- Rudyard Kipling

What does it mean if someone says "that's not for you" about something?

They think they know me.

What field term can be used when a person has the opportunity to solve a problem and deliberately chooses not to?

Intentionally fails.

What are values and principles? Which one do you think is more important in life and why?

I could do something on principle, but it runs contrary to my values. A person’s values are what define their principles.

What does it mean when someone says "I'm your Buddha"?

They have delusions of importance, so they’re really just an idiot.

What is your opinion on taking advice from others? Do you follow it, ignore it, debate it, or decide for yourself what is right and wrong about that advice?

If you rely on other people, you will eventually be disappointed. I listen to opinions, weigh the knowledge, do my own due diligence, and then make my own decisions.

“Never miss a good chance to shut up.”

-- Will Rogers

What is the rule for using "I'm" or "I am" when telling one's age?

They mean the same thing, so I doubt there is a hard rule.

Why are people so against God?

Faith is a belief in something for which there is little or no proof. Everyone has faith that they are right. No one has any proof, and name-calling doesn’t help the debate. If there is no God, we will all die and that is it. If there is a God, atheists will die, theists will be born again, and agnostics will have to endure a severe spanking… just because.

If we were all the same race, what things, other than religion, would people find reasons to hate other people for?

Politics and jealousy.

What does it mean when a person says "I know you didn't mean to hurt me"?

They might honestly be gullible enough to believe you didn’t mean to hurt them. It depends on if they have a gun pointed at you, if they’ve handcuffed you to the bed and put a grenade without the pin between your knees, if they’ve handcuffed you to the bed and plan on spanking the truth out of you, or, they’re simply waiting for you to go to sleep. Personally, I think spanking the truth out of you has a lot of merit on the “fun” meter. Waiting for you to go to sleep is too “Lorena Bobbitt” for me. 

Would it ever turn out bad for someone else if you do everything from a sincere, genuine, and authentic heart?

Only if they hate you for it.

“Being nice is the worst thing a woman can be. Nice means you have to swallow your own feelings and focus on everyone else's. Nice means you don't speak up when you're wronged. Nice means being a people pleaser and a conciliator and worrying yourself to death over others' opinions. Nice means never getting what you really want... Authentic. Genuine. Live your truth. Let others live theirs. Don't kiss anyone's ass, but don't be an asshole, either.”

-- J.T. Geissinger

What is personal development, and why is it important?

Personal development is 50% knowledge and 50% application of that knowledge. The more you know, the more you can develop, if you use the knowledge. If you don’t utilize the knowledge then you have simply developed your brain and nothing else in life. Personal development is all about moving forward, not being stagnant.

What would you say if a very ugly person asks you, “Am I good-looking?”

“No. But, then, I don’t know you.”

What do you think about luck and being lucky most of the time?

Casinos love people who believe in luck. Las Vegas was built by people who believe in luck. I prefer to believe in “cause and effect” instead of luck. What you know can help you win. If you sit down at a poker table, you win by understanding the cards, the odds, and the other player's “tells” of what they probably have. If you win, you are talented. If you lose, not so much. People love to blame their lack of talent on “bad luck” when they lose.

I want to redeem myself for being lazy and giving up on opportunities. What should I do?

Stop being lazy and take some opportunities. This really isn’t rocket science.

Is it better to have high standards and be a failure than to have low standards and be a success?

If you have low standards you might think you’re a success, but you’re not, necessarily. You have attained a goal and you have low standards, which is hard enough to believe. The goal must have been a low bar. People with high standards tend to attain goals that are much loftier.

Success, however, has nothing to do with attaining goals.  It has much to do with attaining true happiness always, and in everything you do, regardless of your circumstances. If you can be “dirt poor” but are truly happy, regardless of your circumstances, then you have attained success that many people with high standards might have missed.

Author's comment: Great analysis. The person's personal value system would come into play. Have you met anyone who would rather hold on to his higher values and be sad, than dump them (through self-deceit and rationalizing) and be happy?

My reply: Actually, yes, when I was the lead chaplain at a regional medical center. I had a heart-to-heart with a man, suffering from PTSD. He came to see the miracles in his life he’s been denying.

“A person with low standards will forever be walking. A person with high standards will soon stop walking and start running. Later, they’ll soon stop running and start galloping. The next time you see him, he’s either flying or soaring.”

-- Israelmore Ayivor

Can the stars ever forgive?

No, but I have faith that the creating force of those stars, the omnipotent force in the universe, certainly can.

What's the greatest way of feeling happiness?

If you have money to spend, you can have happiness, for a time. But, if you make the conscious choice to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances, then your choice to be so has made true happiness sustainable until you change your choice, which is counter-productive. It helps to understand life, cause, and effect, and the choices and decisions you make, in order to be truly happy. It is what it is until it isn’t, and, then, it is what it is, again. 

Are comedians experts in the psychological joy of life?

If so, then Robin Williams would still be with us. Comedians are experts in humor and great timing, and he was the greatest.

Author's comment: Maybe he lost his joy though… and it must have devastated him.

My reply: He suffered from depression, paranoia, memory loss, and insomnia. At 63 years of age, he committed suicide on August 11, 2014. 

How can I build confidence and not be scared to talk to people?

Talk to people. The best way to solve an issue is to confront it. Sit down with complete strangers and ask if you can talk to them. Explain that you are trying to overcome your fear of talking to people. They will more times than not, be very happy to help you out.

Who said, "A King has no friends, only followers"?

Sir John Falstaff, the most trusted friend of King Henry V: 

“A king has no friends, only followers, and foes.”

-- Sir John Falstaff 

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony: tolerantpastor@gmail.com