Questioning Friends, Gifts, Ego, Values, and Life

“I understand we all have our differences. But while learning about history I've read about white people coming together, Jews coming together, Spanish coming together, different cultures and religions understanding and coming together despite their differences. Slavery was never something that shocked me. What shocks me is how black people have not yet overcome the odds and we're such strong smart people. Why we can't just stand together?”

-- Jonathan Anthony Burkett

Where do I find good people to be friends with? I have been searching for upstanding and nice people to be friends with my 29 years of life and I've found none. Not one in my country which only seems to be filled with "snakes". Where do I do?

Volunteerism. You find the best people, upstanding people, who selflessly volunteer their time to help others in need.

What’s the best financial decision that you’ve ever made?

Not to carry any debt. I refuse to be someone else’s bitch, and to pay them interest for the “privilege” of bending over for a monthly spanking. If I want a monthly spanking, I can think of several people I'd rather get it from. Just saying. 

Was Nikola Tesla the wisest person who ever existed?

He was very intelligent, but not smart. If he were smart he would have been a more consummate businessman. As it turned out, he died, alone, living in a hotel room.

Can we say that a lucky person is "more fit" than an unlucky person?

I one believes in “luck,” instead of cause and effect, then they do not rely on knowledge. This makes them “lucky” but, not necessarily, fit. When “luck” runs out, which it will inevitably do, the person with knowledge will, more likely than not, still be standing. 

Why does the left never accept the truth even when it’s so clear, they still repeat what they were told?

Socialist “indoctrination” makes it very difficult to think for yourself… if you’re allowed to think at all. By the way, you might want to check into a "grammar" app.

“The sad truth about humanity...is that people believe what they're told. Maybe not the first time, but by the hundredth time, the craziest of ideas just becomes a given.”

-- Neal Shusterman

I bought a gift for someone dear to me, I gave it to them hoping they will appreciate it but, instead, they left it and did not even apologize or anything. What would be the reason for this attitude?

Your “hope” was unfulfilled. They did not “appreciate” the sentiment you were hoping for. But, then, you were giving the gift for a selfish reason - their appreciation. Giving a gift should be a selfless act of giving, with no thought for any acknowledgment. It is an act of being nice for the sake of being nice, not for the thought of any recompense.  If you had given the gift in this way, this question would be moot.

What will the daily life of a liberal capitalist person who is an atheist be like? Will they be good people in front of their neighbors? Or will they be bad because their God is money?

Three points I’d like to make: Good luck finding a true “liberal” capitalist; no; and, yes. I’ll assume “atheist” as a probability.

If we judged others strictly on their intention and not their actions, would we have fewer conflicts?

Of course. Whenever you remove “freedom of thought” from the equation, you only have to worry about the endgame - revolution. It is an inevitable consequence of punishing everyone for their “intentions” instead of their actions. What most people “intend” never comes to fruition. We have societal laws to keep “intentions” in check. We have to see incontrovertible evidence to back up any belief that they plan of carrying through with their thought, and the evidence must convince a jury of their peers.

When you have used all the words you know to explain and ask for help, does anyone think that they could answer this question, I'm dumbfounded, as I've been told that I will never get to hear the real truth, of my situation, that I'm asking for help on?

Well, you’re asking a question with no context. Without knowing the situation you’re asking for help with, the rest of us will also be dumbfounded on how to answer a question never asked.

How can you accept boredom?

The original question used “embrace” instead of “accept.” Accepting something is pretty easy, you just surrender to the inevitability that it is what it is until it isn’t. To embrace something, however, you have to make the conscious effort to accept that something will probably never change, not in your lifetime. You stop fighting and embrace the fact that all is lost. In this way, you can accept boredom because you know that it is what it is until it isn’t. You can continue the good fight until it does change.

Change is the only true constant in the universe. Everything changes. When it changes, can cause us distress, however. Will we live to see the change, and enjoy it?

“There are no uninteresting things, only uninterested people.”

-- G.K. Chesterton

Who cares about science when I already have all the answers I need thanks to my own amazing intellect?

A legend in your own mind, or, you could be a dead man walking. It depends on how soon reality of an inflated ego catches up to your “amazing intellect.”

Why do feelings affect our moral decision-making? Is it good to make decisions based on our feelings? Try to remember a specific scenario where you make decisions based on your feelings. What is the consequence you have experienced? Elaborate.

Failure or guilt seems to sum up the consequences. When it comes to “moral” decision-making, morality trumps any feelings one might have to the contrary. My feelings might say, “Reach out and caress her supple breast.” Morality, however, tells me I’m probably going to regret bringing the feeling to fruition. It’s just a classless thing to do, and my girlfriend will drive the point home.

What do you say about making a decision every time?

Why me?

What humorous book helped you to improve your sense of humor?

Life helped me to improve my sense of humor. You have to find the humor in life or you will suffer with the rest of retched humanity. If I get into an accident, someone will ask me what happened. I’ll tell them I should have left a few minutes earlier, or later, but, obviously, not when I did.

If you want to improve your sense of humor, read the “Five Whys” of problem-solving. It is an eye-opener to the reality of “fault” that will make you smile.

Do you think that you underestimate, overestimate, or correctly estimate the intelligence of others and where you stand relatively above or below them?

As a general rule, I think I’m pretty good at estimating a person’s intelligence, smarts, or both. Having both, I’ve found to be a rarity.

“It is not that I'm so smart. But I stay with the questions much longer.”

-- Albert Einstein

How do your personal values relate to the values of organization development?

It all depends on if your “personal” values are morally and ethically good. If they aren’t, and your personal values are accepted, then the organization is probaly doomed from the beginning.

Why am I so differently opinionated than most people?

You think differently. Not a bad trait, if you’re right more than they are. Many people are learning to think “out of the box” now.

Is there a name for when you think you are doing the right thing, you thought it out, it feels good and it's not a sin to your conscience and someone else does the opposite, thought it out, etc but you both think the other is doing the wrong thing?

Contrary thinking. One might be right. However, the results might prove that both are right, or that both are wrong. The only validity in this scenario is that both people think the other is wrong and that they are right. The truth, however, may prove to be contrary to both trains of thought.

Are there any negative consequences to being obsessed with something, such as neglecting other important areas of life or losing sight of one's values?

Yes, indeed! One can “neglect important areas of life” or “lose sight of one’s values.” Questions don’t get much easier to answer. You pretty much nailed it.

What do you think of, “I am not a product of my circumstances, I am a product of my decisions”?

I think most people blame their life on their circumstances, not understanding that their circumstances have much to do with their choices and decisions in life. “My marriage failed due to my wife’s infidelity,” but someone made the choice to marry her. The stupidity of not knowing she was a player, is not her concern. If you get into an accident because someone runs a traffic light, maybe you should have left sooner, or later, and missed the idiot. Life is what we make of it.  Stephen R. Covey understood this.

“I am not a product of my circumstances. I am a product of my decisions.”

-- Stephen R. Covey

Why did it take 40+ years to realize life was about sending random cat videos?

Oh, crap! And here I thought it was all about learning. I wasn’t aware I was supposed to be "learning" how to send random cat videos.  I've wasted 70 years.

What kind of skills do I need to develop in order to improve my common sense?

“Good” sense isn’t common, anymore. But, if you’re looking to improve the more common “bad” sense, just keep limping along with it. Your bad sense will be trying to keep up, but it will be always failing.

Good sense is a matter of learning when you fail, and failure is the best way we learn. You improve good sense through trial and error. Keep doing what works most of the time, and stop doing what doesn’t.

What is being and being?

Basically, one is a noun, and one is a verb.

Why does everyone seem so ridiculously stupid when it comes to decision-making? I feel like decisions people make have such an obvious answer to the problem but people do the stupid thing anyway, why is that? Why does almost everyone seem so dumb?

Failure to engage the brain before making a decision, sounds about right. Knee-jerk reactions rarely bear any edible fruit. If it looks like a duck, walks like a duck, and sounds like a duck, it's probably is a duck. If people look dumb, walk dumb, and sound dumb, they’re probably dumb. I’m not sure why most people seem to fill this category. It doesn’t mean I wouldn’t date the airheads, I’ll just have to make all the decisions.

Is corporate greed the same thing as corruption?

No. Corruption is usually marked by dishonest or fraudulent conduct, whereas corporate greed usually is marked by putting the almighty dollar above customer satisfaction. 

“Wherever there is power, greed, and money, there is corruption.”

-- Ken Poirot

 

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony: tolerantpastor@gmail.com