Questioning Fear, Pride, Potential, Goals, and Respect

 

Megalophobia:  "If you or someone you know is suffering from this fear, know that professionals are out there to help to treat this phobia. Living with an irrational, persistent fear may develop long-term severe mental and physical illnesses. It is never too late to begin the end of your phobia. The sooner you start, the easier your recovery will become."

-- HopeQure

What object, real or fictional regardless, would be large enough to cause "megalophobia" in you, personally, and why?

It isn’t the size that would cause my phobia, it would be the situation. A small boulder I can’t move, that might fall and pin my arm in a crevasse, where I probably won’t be found, scares the hell out of me. A boulder, the size of a house, overhanging the highway I’m on… well, my speed might accelerate as I keep an eye on it. If there is no perceived danger, the size of an object doesn’t phase me.

What’s something you never noticed about yourself, until someone else pointed it out?

I was going bald on the back of my head.

How can I not be arrogant and more humble? I’ve changed in the past 2 weeks and I've been arrogant. My cause is low esteem and low self-confidence and insecurity. I feel like a gray brick one ear out the other.

Who, besides you, are you trying to impress? Your esteem, confidence, and security are the purview of only you. What others think is of so little importance. Arrogance is one antithesis of happiness. It is a product of what you’re feeling, and what you’re feeling is misplaced. Learn to love who you are, regardless of other opinions. The only person you can truly count on is you, and you are creating roadblocks for yourself.

Is there a condition named for someone who grows up with parent(s) who do everything for them?

Spoiled.

Why do we blame the immigrants for receiving benefits when they should be pointing the finger at their own leaders? Is this a representation of the mentality of the masses?

This answers itself. We blame the "immigrants" because they aren’t pointing fingers or, more to the point, fighting for change in their own damned country. If they won’t fight for their own homeland, what makes us think they fight for the country they criminally broke laws to enter? In the U.S., this is a mess, and we have the current President, and the last Congress, to blame for it. The one shining star is the 2024 vote that will set us all back on track.

“The Democratic Party leadership has gone out of its way to develop programs (sanctuary cities. DACA, and the like) to attract Latino votes, literally at the expense of opportunities for African Americans.”

-- Horace Cooper

Is unwillingness to accept your mistakes a sign of pride?

Misplaced pride. Everyone around you knows you are unwilling to take responsibility. If you’re proud of this, the pride is misplaced.

Is mania good for a sad person with extremely low energy and self-esteem?

Mania is a mark of mental illness: “Mental illness marked by periods of great excitement or euphoria, delusions, and overactivity.” I find it hard to believe that true mania can be conjured by “a sad person with extremely low energy and self-esteem.” Having low energy and low self-esteem is sad enough without compounding the issues with a faux mental illness.

How do you feel about being the most successful person you know?

Exceedingly and truly happy, regardless of my circumstances! This is the true sign of a successful life.

What do you do if you've been given really bad (inaccurate or poorly contextualized) information either personally or professionally and you didn't find out about it right away?

My fault for not doing my own due diligence and simply assuming the information was right. I would discard the information, explain and apologize to those affected, and endeavor to correct anything it caused. If this isn’t done, I become part of the problem and not the solution.

I despise doing mistakes, I would burn the whole world to ashes for only one critical mistake. Everyone will think I am a subhuman fool and abandon me. What do I do?

Right offhand, I wouldn’t burn the whole world to ashes. What will it gain you to be abandoned because you are thought of as a subhuman fool? Better to work on not making mistakes.

“Smart people learn from their mistakes. But the real sharp ones learn from the mistakes of others.”

-- Brandon Mull

How can soft-spoken people show that they are tough and can stand up for themselves?

Learn Kung Fu or any martial art. A “display” of toughness is unnecessary. The point, for the humble practitioner, is to avoid conflict through dialogue or to diffuse the situation with as little violence as possible. Martial arts come into play only as a last resort.

If 2 people have the same potential but one of them managed to achieve more, are they more valuable and cooler than the other person?

They may have the same “potential” but one works harder, or more efficiently, in order to achieve more.

Why do some people judge others because of their differences? How can we make positive choices that reflect understanding, acceptance, and tolerance?

They judge because they can. It isn’t right, but it is what most humans do. It boosts their fragile egos, which are in danger of being run up the flagpole for all to see. Making “positive choices” is simply all about making the choices, and standing by them. It isn’t all that difficult to make the choices. The difficulty is standing by them in the face of adversity. That takes good character.

How can you tell if a decision is good for society if the majority contributes bad ideas?

If the decision is a “bad idea” then, ultimately, it will not be good for society.

Are all people valuable, in their own ways, or are there some people who just have more talent and are better at everything than those around them?

Having more talent is their value. I served with a General, a base commander, who quietly dressed down a Lieutenant for saying he was going to chew out the janitor for not reporting to fix the building’s boiler so there was heat during the bitter winter in Spokane, Washington. He informed the Lieutenant that the janitor was the only person on base that knew how to finesse the boiler. He told the Lieutenant to show the janitor some respect when he arrived, and to say “please” and “thank you.”

The janitor was more valuable in his own way. He had a necessary talent. He was better at one thing the General saw as important. The janitor was due some respect.

“Who doesn't want to know that we notice them and value them? And who might respond to us better when they feel that they matter? It probably cannot be overstated – it matters...that people matter.”

-- Steve Goodier

What do you do when a friend has different goals than you?

They’re not you. Good for them for being individuals. Pat them on the back and wish them luck.

How do I stop feeling guilty for wanting a content life, a simple career; not working as a first responder, or similar?

Not all jobs are “first responders” or similar. Many jobs support them so they can do what they do, or live the way they choose to live. Be content in that, somehow, you being content in what you do might support those who support the supporters of first responders… or similar. People constantly thank me for my military service, and the reply we give is, “Thank you for your support.” Giving thanks is a small effort that means so much to those who dare to sacrifice. Please, do not feel guilty.

Does everyone get treated like shit every once in a while?

Yes. It’s life keeping everyone humble. Those who deny humility get a visit from karma. Better to feel humble. 

How can you be happy when it seems as though everything is against you?

True happiness is a choice, and “everything against you” is a test. Life throws a bucket of crap at you to see how you respond. It isn’t that you stand or fall, it has to do with whether you get up or stay down. It is a test of your perseverance in the face of adversity.

Does the lack of sunshine affect the happiness of people living in Scandinavia?

Probably, but, have you seen the women’s volleyball team? Wow!

“At my place, I can really tell when winter has come. It's when sunlight is pathetically crawling in my courtyard, incapable of reaching my window anymore.”

-- Boulet

Is there anything more satisfying than helping someone? If there is, what is it?

Lascivious sex. It is the only thing I’ve found that comes close.

I am very afraid of my presence. If I am here, the world is here. I’m afraid that I am alone because I am ever present. Is there something beyond presence or perception?

Standing at the edge of the abyss, staring off into infinity. The “world” is not everywhere, and it certainly is not there. It is you, the abyss, and infinity. If you stare into the abyss, it might stare back. Don’t be afraid, just smile.

Why we should respect everyone?

Do you want to be respected? By everyone? You get what you give.

What opinion do you have that you’re surprised isn’t more common?

I’d like to say that I’m smarter, not more intelligent, than those around me, so it’s harder for them to “surprise” me. An “intelligent” person is too focused to pay attention to the many things going on around them. The “smart” person sacrifices a bit of that intelligence to stay one step ahead of any surprise.

What are some things 100% of people collectively have nothing but a positive opinion on and think it's good no matter what?

Nothing. Remember this adage:

“You can please some of the people all of the time, you can please all of the people some of the time, but you can't please all of the people all of the time.”

-- John Lydgate

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony: tolerantpastor@gmail.com