Personal Exploration and Discovery (updated from 2/28/2015)

“Man cannot discover new oceans unless he has the courage to lose sight of the shore.”

-- Andre Gide

Once again, knowing what I wanted to write about, personal exploration and discovery, was at odds with actually having something to say.  This happens to me more often than not, and I have learned to be patient and something will present itself to spur me onward.  Well, it happened again.  Just as I was finished working outside and getting ready to take a shower before hitting the blog once more, someone dear to me called.  She was tired and frustrated as she and her husband's search for a house seemed to, continuously, run aground.  They set out to discover new oceans, dared to lose sight of the shore, and encountered some rough weather.  This is to be expected when life is disrupted with moving a household out of state, being downsized out of a current job, finding new employment, finding a new home you can afford much less get a loan for, ensuring your children are secure, etc.  Any one of these would be a cause for stress, much less having to shoulder all of them together.  The good news was, the job was all but waiting.

“Things just happen in the right way, at the right time. At least when you let them, when you work with circumstances instead of saying, 'This isn't supposed to be happening this way,' and trying harder to make it happen some other way.”

-- Benjamin Hoff 

Everything we do, that is new, is a voyage of exploration and discovery.  If we just sit in our cabin and await our destination we will miss the sights and sounds of our voyage, the many ports of call, and perhaps the occasional adventure.  In the case presented above, I have to fall back on the adage, "It does little good to stress over anything over which you have no control."  Hell, it does little good to stress over that which you do have some modicum of control.  It is a voyage of discovery after all; go out and discover!  Such was my advice.  Take a break, breathe, and relax.  After a week, sit down, make a new plan with a new tact, and go back out into the world with the understanding that all will present itself in good time.  I stated the obvious and, as expected, she was already there.  

“The real voyage of discovery consists not in seeking new landscapes, but in having new eyes.”

-- Marcel Proust

We all stress, usually over issues of our own making.  Oh, we blame other people generally because we have a hard time accepting responsibility for our own stupidity but, truth be known, the fault usually lies squarely on our own shoulders.  When I hear someone is at the end of their rope, stressed to the proverbial breaking point, I usually ask why.  What I usually get back are results that they think are causes.  "My boss is being a prick."  The statement is a result.  By asking "why," we work our way backward and learn as we go.  Why is the boss a prick?  "The project was late."  Another result.  Why was the project late?  We continue to explore the "why" of things until, sooner or later, there are no more reasons to ask the question, at which point you usually find out the real reason for the issue at hand.  Why isn't this done more often?  It isn't much fun for the explorer as we begin this journey down the less traveled, revealing path of obvious answers but, if they can be honest in their search, they almost always find some lost treasure at the end. 

“If you do something that has never been done you will collect treasures that have never been found.”

-- Jenna Newton

This person is very dear to me, and we don't talk nearly as much as we should.  Her stress will pass, as it usually does.  This will be looked back upon as another adventure in life with many little treasures of knowledge learned from the experience.  I would like to think it is because we talk, have always talked, and I have always waited for her to discover answers.  Life is about lessons, not about someone doing your homework for you, and she is well aware of this.  She is not one of those to blame others or reach for the, all too often misinterpreted, breaking point.

"Before beginning a Hunt, it is wise to ask someone what you are looking for before you begin looking for it."

-- Winnie the Pooh

To put my own fine point on it, those that think they have reached this stressful "breaking point" in their life should spend less time whining and more time finding out why where they strayed from their path.  Why did they end up in this quagmire?  When they work their way back up the trail to eventually find out where they went wrong, then they will be able to change their lives and make everything right again.  As you can see, it truly is all about them.  If they can't do this, and if they can't take ownership of the outcome of their own decisions, they are doomed to remain on this course, and their lives will rely more on luck than on anything they can do to change their lot.

"When the root cause of an issue is found, even if you do nothing, or feel you can do nothing, to change the course of events, there is much to be said for taking ownership and responsibility for your circumstance. That, in itself, is life-changing for the better, and any step forward is the beginning of a new journey."

-- F.A. Villari

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Submissiveness, Fear, Age, Pressure, and Tripe

 

“Man is the one who desires, woman the one who is desired. This is woman's entire but decisive advantage. Through his passion nature has given man into woman's hands, and the woman who does not know how to make him her subject, her slave, her toy, and how to betray him with a smile, in the end, is not wise.”

-- Leopold von Sacher-Masoch

If your partner communicates something in a passive-aggressive tone, does it give you the right to act the same? Am I wronging myself by acting better or taking the high road?

It is totally up to you. You have the freedom, to “take the high road,” to be honest about how they’ve acted, to act the same, to be more aggressive than they are, or to be submissive to the spanking you’re being dealt.  Spankings seem to keep us on the straight and narrow, though.  Just saying.

Is it possible to be honest without potentially offending someone?

No. Sooner or later, blatant honesty will offend someone. It is the nature of the beast.

Author comment: Very well explained. Thank you for your answer, my friend.

What is the most important Core Value, and how does it enhance the competitiveness of the organization in the market/industry?

A good sense of moral ethics. When people know you’re not playing dirty, they really have to bring all they have to the table. When it becomes known that you are ethical, people will be more than happy to do business with you, knowing that you are looking out for their best interests.

 What type of person can you see with a cocky attitude?

A person with an overabundance of self-assurance.

Is the average person ethically underdeveloped?

If you have no code of moral ethics to stand by, then, yes. A good code of moral ethics is something you can turn on and off, though it is not recommended. It is what defines who and what you are to all those around you. It is a way of life.

“Education without values, as useful as it is, seems rather to make man a more clever devil.”

-- C.S. Lewis

What makes people so afraid to be themselves?

Not everybody is okay with pant-down spankings.

 What do I do if my partner thinks I acted passive-aggressive when I did not?

Buy your partner a copy of anything written by the French philosopher, Donatien Alphonse François. Then, smile and dare them to make your day.

Is hatred devotion?

I devoted myself to the hatred of my ex-wife for a couple of years. She wasted 25 years of my life before telling me she never loved me and only used me to escape her parents. I never hated anyone in my life, until I hated her. My hatred was insidious. It ate me up until my new girlfriend told me to let it go.

I made the conscious choice to strive for happiness always and in all things, regardless of my circumstances. I have been truly happy for the past 20 years, now. More people need to understand that happiness is a simple choice in their lives. To do anything else is counterproductive.

Why do people admit they are wrong?

They have a morally ethical personal code. Most people balk at any admission of fault.

 What can you do to bring your voice out, even when you’re afraid of speaking in public?

Projection. Practice being heard across a room. Then practice being heard across a yard. Then practice being heard on the stage of an auditorium by a person at the doors in the back. Do this all without yelling. Make your voice deeper and stronger, by bringing it up from your diaphragm. Mothers can do this to great effect.

A speech is poetry: cadence, rhythm, imagery, sweep! A speech reminds us that words, like children, have the power to make dance the dullest beanbag of a heart.

-- Peggy Noonan

When someone makes unfair judgments or assumptions about you that are untrue, how do you deal with the situation and move forward?

It is pretty obvious the person is an idiot, so I ignore them and simply move forward. I try not to waste my valuable time confronting idiots.

What was the first noticeable indication that you experienced, which made you realize that you were getting older?

The priapism was not forthcoming.

I admire the worker more than I admire the businessman. Does this make me a Communist?

I admire the worker more than the businessman. That makes me a Republican. A businessman that relies on everyone else's sweat, well… 

When someone always tells you that you are judging, are they in effect also being judgmental of you?

Yes. They should be asking, not telling. “It sounds like you’re judging, are you?” If they say “yes” they have arrived at the gates of hell.

Author's comment:  I think that she is trying to assert her dominance. All tho quite ineptly and rather poorly and childish. Now that I look at it this way I am going to have to get out of this group. I feel like the next time she “ JUDGESi might just bust out laughing at her in her face. 

My reply:  That will probably get you out, anyway.

Do you want to know what drives consumer behavior?

It has so little to do with me. Need drives my behavior, in all aspects of life, and all I need are the essentials.

“Remember… consumers want it all, a richer experience, a purchase at the comfort of their homes, a friendly searchable brand with brain/ eyes stimulating content & an engaging experience at store”

-- Sally El-Akkad

What does it mean when a woman asks if she’s the one for me?

She wants to know if you’re any good at getting her off. Tell her you’ll spring for the hotel room so you can find out.

What motivates people who are in affairs?

The excitement of tasting the forbidden fruit, especially if the fruit is someone else’s?

How do you measure peer pressure in units of PSI?

Before the Air Force, it was an unbearable burden. The military taught me that it was just bullshit I bought into, but didn’t have to. Being your own person has nothing to do with peer pressure, but it has much to do with good ethical manners. 

What motivates rich people more than money?

What money can buy?

After transitioning to democracy, what punishment do you think should be given to the members of the secret police? I know most of the time nothing happens to them, but what do they deserve?

Do unto them as they have done unto others. Or, you can forgive them their transgressions and, one day in the future, shoot them in the knee on the field of battle. Then shoot them in the other knee, just so they don’t forget.

“Worst of all, with every victim, who is deliberately silenced to preserve the peace, we are creating a new minority. Through deliberate neglect, the left creates what they fear the most: a non-ethnic group of people that will not blink an eye when violent crimes are committed. No one cared when it happened to them, so why should they? An eye for an eye...as they don't use them anyway.”

-- Anita B. Sulser, Ph.D.

In which aspect of society are you interested? Be descriptive.

The “law-abiding” aspect. This means you abide by all of the “rules of law” society has set down. You don’t burn down cities, steal what doesn’t belong to you, shoot the innocent, murder those who can't defend themselves, corrupt voting, push people off the subway platform, disregard warning signs, or violate sovereign borders, just to name a few.

What is an example of a bad decision done in good faith?

Joe Biden.

If it takes so much skill, effort, and luck to make acquaintances, how come there are so many people who have acquaintances?

Who fed you this line of tripe? It really doesn’t take much skill, effort, or luck, to make acquaintances. Now, making friends might take some “effort” which is where the “skill” comes in. Of course, if they’re true friends, just being yourself is all you need for them.

What is the best way to get inspiration to come up with ideas for music?

Live life to the fullest. Work hard, and fall in and out of love. Experience as much as you can.

Do you agree with Sergei Khrushchev’s statement when he told me that a pessimist is a well-informed optimist?

No. You are either one or the other. You can’t be a well-informed “optimist” if the information turns you into a well-informed pessimist. A well-informed optimist just found out that all the information he had validates his optimism. But, even if it doesn’t, the quintessential optimist will be optimistic even in the face of defeat.

"Damn the torpedoes. Four bells, Captain Drayton, go ahead. Jouett, full speed." 

-- David Glasgow Farragut (1801-1870)

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

On Becoming a Surrogate Father

 

"He passed at 4:44 pm Monday (yesterday)."

The following is the transcript of my conversation with a woman very dear to me:

"Having a pain and anxiety flare. My dad said yesterday that he thinks he's dying. I think he is too and I slept across 3 hard chairs at the hospital last night

I almost got kicked out of the hospital yesterday."

"I'm sorry to hear about your dad. I had three strokes to get ready for mine to pass. He changed a lot after the first stroke, so I figure he died for me, at that point. I still haven't grieved his loss. I just don't have it in me. I think he understands, though.

You're a good daughter to give what you are, though. I respect that."

"Thank you.  He's dying today."

"My sympathy, my prayers, and all my love. I am truly sorry."

"Thank you."

"He passed at 4:44 pm Monday (yesterday)."

"I am so sorry for you. I will send my prayers. Love you."

"I love you too.  Now you're my official dad."

"And, I am proud to accept the mantle."

And that, my friends, is how you become a surrogate father.  But, it is very costly where emotion is concerned.  I wept at her loss.  I wept at my gain.  From the far Northwest to the central Gulf Coast, the distance became a moot point.

I have known this young lady for, well, many years, now.  I have always loved her, and it has always confused me.  I was substantially older, not that it should make a difference, but, as pretty as she was, it wasn't all about that.  It was more about being a mentor and listening.  She thanked me, some time back, for helping her to be the woman she has become.  A few days ago, she reiterated those thanks and, once again, I was humbled.

Now, I have become what I always accepted I was to her, a surrogate dad.  When she had no one else, I was always here.  And, it looks like I will always be.  Now, I can claim my natural daughter and her two children, my son, and his significant other, and, now, another "daughter" that won't let me sidestep her, not that I would consider it.

People pass through our lives, and they move on.  Occasionally, they leave footsteps on your heart.  This young lady trampled all over mine, like a young child, and all I could do is laugh with her.  Now, in her time of grief, all I can do is cry with her.

I have always felt that, in some past life, I must have, somehow, let her down.  Perhaps I was her protector and she died on my watch.  It is my penance is to keep finding her, now and again, for whatever reason.  A "hell on earth" that I can live with.

As I approach my 70th birthday, I hope she will miss me when I pass through to the next great adventure.  I smile at the inevitability that we will, at some point, meet again.  Karma can be a bitch, but, this karma is very good.  Of my new "daughter" I can only say, she is a handful.

“When you hurt, I hurt all the same, blood is only blood, and a name is just a name.”

-- Lavinia Valeriana

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Easter - Just a Thought (Updated from 2/25/2015)

I realize I'm less than two weeks early for this post, but I wanted everyone to have some time to reflect on their own thoughts about the Easter holy day.  I have included a couple of links to text which, I hope, will entice you to read further and become more familiar with the hidden religion of Christianity that, I feel, is slowly being accepted as more to the heart of faith than what we have been forced fed as "truth" for two thousand years.  The reason it has been hidden and denied by the hierarchy is evident when you read the words.  It isn't about control or fear, and it doesn't read like Biblical text as it hasn't been translated to death by monks with agendas.  I offer the following, as translated from the Nag Hamadi Text, commonly referred to as The Gospel of Mary:

"Be on your guard so that no one deceives you by saying, 'Look over here!' or 'Look over there!' For the child of true Humanity exists within you. Follow it! Those who search for it will find it.  Go then, preach the good news about the Realm. Do not lay down any rule beyond what I determined for you, nor promulgate law like the lawgiver, or else you might be dominated by it."

-- Jesus, "The Gospel of Mary"

And what have Peter and the Christian churches done since?  They have said, "'Look over here!' or 'Look over there!'" when the true child of humanity does not lie in the church or in the priest, but within us.  They lay down rules beyond what Jesus and God have determined for us and they "promulgate law like the lawgiver," and we are dominated by it!

After Christ rose from death, the story of Jesus does not end.  It continues through The Gospel of Mary and reveals much of the struggle between faith and egos, egos to which Peter and Andrew would ultimately fall prey, and which would ultimately shape Christianity as we know it today.  Was this the faith that Christ intended, or was the meaning of the life he lived, and his death on the cross, mistakenly left in the hands of a total incompetent that would go against everything the savior wished?  Jesus, by his own admission, was just a man.  That he loved Peter so much as to be blinded to Peter's latent sexist attitudes and greed for power is not beyond reason, nor is the possibility that Andrew's ignorance might make him more of a sheep to be led and, perhaps without his realizing it, develop this same taste for power and control.  After all, these were the very same people that Jesus knew would deny him.  

I invite you to follow this link to read "The Gospel of Mary" and decide for yourself.  This gospel is considered a gnostic text; basically, scholars question if it speaks any truth.  A bit of commentary, from James M. Robinson, is found at the top of the translation at www.sol.com.au/kor/7_03.htm. 

I wrote about The Gospel of Mary back in August of 2013 in my post, The Savior Said..., and, instead of going through it all again, I invite you to follow the link and consider these other views I offer.  In short, I find it fascinating that only scripture, the "sacred" written word that demands fear and unconditional obedience to an omnipotent being that doles out pity in equal measure to how much you grovel, was chosen for the Bible of Christianity.  And yet, these "lost gospels" which seem to relate a kinder, gentler, and highly intelligent side of the philosophies of Christ, were left out.

Did Jesus rise?  I don't know, do you?  What if he didn't?  Would it matter?

"A man who was completely innocent, offered himself as a sacrifice for the good of others, including his enemies, and became the ransom of the world.  It was the perfect act."

-- Mahatma Gandhi

Back in the mid-1980s I was afforded the opportunity to accept a special duty assignment with the intelligence detachment at Area 51.  I had top-secret security clearances, with caveats, up the wazoo.  Even if I didn't have the required "need to know" for certain information and projects, I had always been able to finagle a way to find out.  I mean, really, if I couldn't do that one simple task there was no reason for me to be with intelligence, right?  Anyway, since I was a kid I had always had an interest in unidentified flying objects, UFOs... flying saucers.  For me, this was the assignment of a lifetime.  But, I declined the invitation.  This was probably the only chance I would ever have to answer the questions we all have about Area 51, and I didn't take it.  I just didn't want to know. If they were real, I wouldn't be able to tell.  If they weren't, I would be crushed,  Better to just not know.

"Faith is to believe what you do not see; the reward of this faith is to see what you believe."

-- Saint Augustine

The risk with having faith is finding out the truth.  What happens if truth flies in the face of faith?  In the case of my assignment, I decided I would rather continue believing, having faith, in the possibility we are being visited by extraterrestrials, than risk finding out flying saucers aren't real.  What would be the fun of that?  Did Jesus rise after death?  I would rather have continuing faith that he did than find out he's just a mummified future museum exhibit lost in some forgotten hole in a desert mountainside.

Does it matter?  Our lives are inundated with lies and bullshit.  It is an essential part of marketing, politics, and religion.  We are born to exist as "marks" to be constantly taken advantage of at a moment's notice by the latest snake oil salesman.  I think it matters that our faith isn't based on lies and bullshit.  Personally, I think the Bible is rife with contradictions, and questionable passages, philosophy, and provenance.  Unfortunately, it is all we have, until there is something else, like gospels, texts, and libraries of forgotten knowledge buried in some desert cashe.

"The great gift of Easter is hope - Christian hope which makes us have confidence in God, in His ultimate triumph, and in His goodness and love, which nothing can shake."

-- Basil Hume

But, for me, the story of Jesus rising goes to the very heart of faith, a faith that there is something more to look forward to after death.  It was His proof to us of a life in another plane of existence, a "Kingdom of Heaven."  Without faith in this eventual outcome, what were we to be left with, just another crucified prophet?  No proof of a "Son of God."  No physical manifestation is presented as the living God on earth.

"Easter is very important to me, it's a second chance."

-- Reba McEntire

I am approaching my 70th birthday.  If Jesus didn't rise, I don't want to know about it.  What possible good would it serve to know, other than to "make the day" of radical atheists.  The joke would be on them, though.  They'd have to find something else to constantly bitch about, or give up their membership in the League of the Perpetually Offended.  As with Area 51, I just don't want to know.  

I am perfectly content to live, what is left of my life, having faith in little green men and a loving God that made us all. I offer one version of a typical television news story heard each year on the final Friday of Lent:

"Today is Good Friday, observed by Christians worldwide as a day that commemorates the crucifixion of Jesus Christ, the Son of God, whose death redeemed the sins of mankind." 

Here is the way it should be written:

"Today is Good Friday, observed worldwide by Jesus buffs as the day on which the popular, bearded cultural figure, sometimes referred to as The Messiah, was allegedly crucified and according to legend died for mankind's so-called sins. Today kicks off a 'holy' weekend that culminates on Easter Sunday, when, it is widely believed, this dead 'savior' who also, by the way, claimed to be the son of a sky-dwelling, invisible being known as God, mysteriously 'rose from the dead.' According to the legend, by volunteering to be killed and actually going through with it, Jesus saved every person who has ever lived and every person who ever will live from an eternity of suffering in a fiery region popularly known as hell, providing so the story goes that the person to be 'saved' firmly believes this rather fanciful tale." 

That would be an example of unbiased news reporting. Don't wait around for it to happen. The aliens will land first." 

"They came from the sky", excerpt from "When Will Jesus Bring The Pork Chops?" (George Carlin, 2004)

Think about the above comedy excerpt of George Carlin this way:  The news story is the party line the church pumps out, every year.  The way it should be written defines why our faith is so strong in the face of all the obstacles put in the way of a possible truth.  

Either way, I win.

I also believe strongly in a second chance.  I have faith.

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Your Gut, Love, Hypocrites, Happiness, and Denial

"I doubt, therefore I think,

therefore I am"

-- René Descartes

How does a person know if they deserve to be roundly disliked if they really are clueless as to why they'd be disliked?

They might not know. This is why it is incumbent on others to clue them in that they’re acting inappropriately. We do this very occasionally at my favorite cigar bar. Most of us are military veterans, so we know how to act in public… and how to take a hint.

What made you think you were you?

I think, therefore I am. I have a valid history. The Air Force vetted me for an Intelligence position. Everyone else is taken, so who else would I be?

Assuming my current opinions (on an issue) are valid and meritorious, what (cognitively) inhibits me from (adopting) a different point of view, which may be of equal legitimacy? Why might I even refrain from looking for an alternative perspective?

If you are a seeker of truth, and you hear evidence of possible legitimacy, though it may be a different view, it is incumbent on you to keep an open mind and consider the other viewpoint. If, however, you have a closed mind to other possibilities, then you will ignore alternative perspectives.

Should you always "go with your gut"?

Not if your brain has more valid information. The “gut” is fine when information is dicey.

How do I approach other people if I want to make new friends at a bar?

Do not ask the young lady how much she charges. Ask her if you can buy her a drink. Introduce yourself. Play pool, shuffleboard, or darts. Initiate conversations with folks. Be friendly.

"barfly n. You have the ability to talk to anyone which is an ability I do not share."

-- David Levithan

People say "just be kind" but if you are always kind to awful people, won't this only enable their behavior?

Being kind to “awful people” might mean sitting them down and being the only honest person to tell them they act awful.

I'm 28 and I feel so lost in my life. How do I find myself?

First of all, you aren’t lost. You know where you are. Second, you need to strive for true happiness always in your life and in everything you do, regardless of your circumstances or feelings. Now that you’re truly happy in life, regardless of your circumstances, you can look in the mirror and give yourself a big smile. There you are. You’ve found yourself. Now, go find something constructive to do that you will enjoy, or selflessly help someone. There is something about work that you really enjoy, or selflessly helping others, that defines who and why you are.

What are the most important qualities of a successful student?

A modicum of Intelligence, and good study habits.

Can a person love someone who has had many partners?

Not any more than you can love someone who wants many partners… unless watching them together turns you on. Trust is a big player in relationships, and unless they plan on proving to you that they’re ready to settle down, they are just another date to have fun with.

What are some tips for making someone notice you when shopping?

Raise an eyebrow and smile at them.

“You should know that it is very easy to get people's attention and there are many ways; but trying not to attract people's attention, that's a difficult art because no matter what you do, someone will still notice you!”

-- Mehmet Murat ildan

Why would a person say they're so happy to see me and then tell me I'm annoying after we talked?

They really weren’t happy to see you, they were just being cordial. I’d be asking them why they think I’m so annoying.

What is your opinion on looking at someone while they shop? Do you think it is creepy or not?

It can be creepy. It can be more creepy if you are massaging your “package” while looking.

How do you explain to someone that they're experiencing a different version of events than you did, even though you both have the same perspective?

If your explanation is a different version than theirs, you both have a differing perspective of the events. Once you explain what you witnessed, they will explain their version, and you will both know that what you both witnessed is different. 

How can you tell if someone has experienced the same thing as you?

Chaffing on their wrists might be a tell.

What does it mean when someone says "there was never meant to be anything between us"?

The relationship is over. Suck it up and walk away, before you waste even more effort.  If you just had a few drinks, or dinner, tell them it was fun while it lasted.

"Not a word passes between us, not because we have nothing to say, but because we don't have to say anything."

-- Khaled Hosseini

Whose job is it to make me happy? Most people think their personal happiness is the responsibility of other/s, is it? Does independence mean happiness or does dependence mean happiness?

Most people are idiots. If you want to be truly happy it is up to you to make that happen. No one is responsible for your ultimate happiness. It is your life, not theirs. Most people have enough on their plate without supporting you, as well. They will attempt to do it, hoping to make you happy, because they’re idiots. I am not responsible for you any more than you are responsible for me. People that understand this, might need a “hand-up,” if you’d like to help, but they certainly don’t need a handout. Strive to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances. It is a choice you must make.

What are some positive thoughts to take the place of negative thoughts?

If you’re replacing negative with positive, then just reverse your negative thoughts into positive ones. If it’s bad, make it good. Is this another one of those trick questions?

Have you ever had to forgive someone for something that was very difficult to let go of?

Yes. Hate was eating at me. I had never really hated anybody in life, but, at 47 years of age, my wife informed me that she had never loved me. She was using me as an escape route from her parents and home life. One would think she could have told me this before I wasted 25 years of my life with her. It explained 25 years of hell. I made the conscious choice to accept the apology I knew I was never going to get from her. I was willing to let karma takes its course. I strive, daily, to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of my circumstances. I have been “living in sin” and truly happy for the past 17 years. 

What are the values that never condemn anyone?

Discussion and understanding, agreeing to disagree, and having an open mind.

What is the difference between selfishness and rebellion?

Selfishness is when you want something and don’t want to share it. Rebellion is when you are told you can have only this, but you’re willing to fight for something better. Rebellion is selfish when it only benefits you and not the greater good of society.

“I hold it that a little rebellion now and then is a good thing, and as necessary in the political world as storms in the physical. Unsuccesful rebellions indeed generally establish the incroachments on the rights of the people which have produced them. An observation of this truth should render honest republican governors so mild in their punishment of rebellions, as not to discourage them too much. It is a medecine necessary for the sound health of government.”

-- Thomas Jefferson

What makes anyone quick to deny fault for letting every bad thing in life (corrupt politics among them) and their negative thinking affect how they live?

Lack of responsibility, denial, and shifting blame, they could be a narcissist, or on the road to becoming one.

I think with the use of common sense, we all understand the reason behind others’ behavior, but what is special about being a psychologist?

Psychologists step in because “common” sense isn’t that common anymore.

What is the importance of a positive mindset, and how can it help you become a winner in life?

Positivity is constructive in life, just as negativity is destructive. If you want to be a winner, why would you work so hard to be destructive to your life?

How do I tell a teacher that I won't do an assignment because it's about something personal and it is none of her business?

You have answered your question. Go tell her.

How do I deal with guilt and regret after having reacted impulsively toward an internet technician who was about to enter my room and didn't have it clean?

If your room wasn’t clean, then you need to be more responsible for cleaning it. Going off on a technician for your own shortcomings is a bit selfish. Either keep your room clean or understand that people will judge you by it. Either way, it is on you.

“Guilt is not a response to anger; it is a response to one’s own actions or lack of action. If it leads to change then it can be useful since it is then no longer guilt but the beginning of knowledge. Yet all too often, guilt is just another name for impotence, for defensiveness destructive of communication; it becomes a device to protect ignorance and the continuation of things the way they are, the ultimate protection for changelessness.”

-- Audre Lorde

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Friends, Death, Respect, Naughty, and Change

 

“The girl says "Oh uh-uh, wait a minute! Wait a minute! Just because I'm dressed this way does not make me a whore!" Which is true, Gentlemen, that is true. Just because they dress a certain way doesn't mean they are a certain way. Don't even forget it. But ladies, you must understand that is fucking confusing. It just is. Now that would be like me, Dave Chappelle, the comedian, walking down the street in a cop uniform. Somebody might run up on me saying, "Oh, thank God. Officer, help us! Come on. They're over here. Help us!" "Oh-hoh! Just because I'm dressed this way does not make me a police officer!" See what I mean? All right, ladies, fine. You are not a whore. But you are wearing a whore's uniform.”

-- Dave Chappelle

Is a 49-year-old man telling a young girl she looks like a whore in her school uniform bad?

Is the 49-year-old man a letch?

Do books and movies make people feel better when they are sad?

It depends on the book or the movie. “The Texas Chainsaw Massacre” certainly didn’t make me feel better. Neither did “The Hills Have Eyes.” And, any book written by Hillary Clinton… well, facts might be nice.

Why were most of the successful people good at studying?

They were as “smart” as they were intelligent. Having both makes them an anomaly.

Does learning a lot make you "smarter" or just more knowledgeable?

Both. If you’re it makes you smarter you are more knowledgeable, and vice versa. It might even make you more intelligent, to boot. Smarts and intelligence, are an anomaly.

Can I get some good friends here?

I sincerely hope so.

“Two kinds of people have many friends, one with bank balance and the other with boldness.”

-- Amit Kalantri

What does positive self-talk do?

It develops a positive attitude. I strive to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of my circumstances. This “positivity” is a choice I have made for my life, and I wake up every morning thanking God for the “gift” of another day in paradise to try and excel. The alternative simply sucks.

Why do we value the person in our past?

We learn much from relationships, good and bad. Knowledge is always a valuable commodity to be cherished.

Why does a grown-up man fear more than in his fearless young age days?

He understands death a lot more than when he was younger.

How do you explain the outpouring of religious enthusiasm in this era?

The world is going to hell in a handbasket. People want to hope for something better. Faith in the supreme power in the universe gives many people hope for the future. Faith tends to breed hope.

What is your opinion on learning vs. growing as a person? Why do you feel this way?

If you learn, you grow as a person. It is what it is.

“The more that you read, the more things you will know. The more that you learn, the more places you'll go.”

-- Dr. Seuss

Have you ever lost any respect for someone instantly?

Yes, in the military. I lost respect for my fellow trainers that would give up on people they were supposed to train. I would ultimately become the trainer for the “untrainable” and fix the issues other trainers didn’t want to take time for.

Why do we keep making the same mistakes with the same person?

A glutton for punishment?

How come I’m afraid to be white anymore?

Stop buying into the socialist “Critical Race Theory.” I’m Sicilian and Irish. Everyone needs to understand that ALL lives matter, not just one, and the past is to be remembered, not used as a tool to bilk money from folks who have done nothing wrong to give it to folks who have an equal chance to move upward. The Chinese, Italian, and Irish will pitch one hell of a fit. Laws guarantee equality. We are at that tipping point where we all may fall back instead of moving forward. Don’t be afraid to be anything. We are all human, we are all equal, and we are all due respect. Don’t let the new racists make you think otherwise. 

Why does it feel like my family only uses me to do stuff for them and to give them money, but when I ask for something, the answer is always no?

You are being used, and you’re allowing them to do it. Maybe you should stop.

What are some ways to deal with people who try to control others through guilt?

No one is free of sin. You can try to find their “Achilles heel” and use it to great effect, or you can simply ignore their ignorance and judgment. But, always remember, those who judge have much to hide.

“All over the place, from the popular culture to the propaganda system, there is constant pressure to make people feel that they are helpless, that the only role they can have is to ratify decisions and to consume.”

-- Noam Chomsky

How kinky/naughty are you?

Just enough not to get arrested… or caught.

What are some ways to deal with a person who is always complaining about his/her life being so difficult and unfair?

Their life is all about their own choices and decisions. If they made better ones, they wouldn’t have their own mistakes to bitch about. It is their life, and they can make of it what they want. Perhaps they want to be miserable. We all have the option to lead our own lives. Personally, I lead my life away from the complainer. Life is too short for drama.

What does a firefighter say to a child who thanks him/her for saving his life?

You are so welcome, and it was my great pleasure!

How can you develop a sense of purpose and meaning in your personal and professional life?

Be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances. Do this and your purpose and meaning will become clear. But, if it doesn’t, you will still be truly happy always and in all things, yadda, yadda, yadda. Just a thought. 

What does it mean when someone says they want your respect and don't ask for your love?

They don’t want your love, they want your respect. If love was more important they would have asked for it.

“Respect was invented to cover the empty place where love should be.”

-- Leo Tolstoy

What have you changed your mind about? Why?

Organized religion. It seems like they are all about control, more than about religion. I was raised a Catholic, but have forsaken the church in favor of my own humble belief. A belief, like so many others, that is based on little or no proof. But I have an undying faith that I am closer to being right than two thousand years of  religion.

Why does my ex-boyfriend who left me miss me anyway? He said from the beginning he doesn’t love me even though I’m dear to him.

Be very suspicious of smoke and mirrors.

Does anyone on here ever accept responsibility for their parts of a relationship?

I did. I forgave my ex-wife for her part, and then I forgave myself for my part. I accepted the apology I knew I wasn’t ever going to get from her, and then I chose to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of my circumstances. I still love her, I just know in my heart I can’t be with her. Accepting this, I have been truly happy for about 20 years, now.

What can we learn from billionaires?

Nothing that they’re willing to teach us.

How would you describe the most humble person you have ever met?

He was a quiet, African, Catholic priest, with a beautiful accent and a smile that lit up a room. He came to the medical center when I was the lead chaplain, for a blessing of the hands. To shake his hand was a feeling I don’t get often enough.

“True humility is not thinking less of yourself; it is thinking of yourself less.”

-- Rick Warren

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony: tolerantpastor@gmail.com