Questioning Negativity, Leadership, Maturity, Orders, and Lying

 

“When someone tells me "no," it doesn't mean I can't do it, it simply means I can't do it with them.”

-- Karen E. Quinones Miller

Why do mean and negative people refuse to forgive anybody?

Because they’re mean and negative. If they forgive, they, God forbid, admit a chink in their armor.

How should I handle people who belittle me under the guise of friendliness? If I try to respond to it, they make it look like I am the one who has a problem or they choose to respond nastily. Avoidance is not an option. What mindset should I have?

Avoidance is always an option. Ignore them, or speak to them only when you have to. Personally, I’d start belittling them under the guise of being a total asshole. When they ask what the problem is, tell them you’ll go back to being an adult as soon as they discover what one is. I can redefine “nasty” for them, if that’s the game they like to play.

What does it mean when you see a person, without knowing him you start to think that he is different from other people, somehow he stands out? Others see him as a usual person.

They haven’t met the person in a past life.

As an educator, what traits are associated with poorly behaved, or underperforming, yet intelligent students?

I wanted to learn what I wanted to learn. If a subject interested me, I threw myself into it. The problem was that these subjects were few and far between. I almost didn't graduate high school. When I got into college, however, psychology fascinated me. I took every psych class offered and averaged a 3.2 GPA.

What do you like about yourself?

What’s not to like?

“Love yourself. Forgive yourself. Be true to yourself. How you treat yourself sets the standard for how others will treat you.”

-- Steve Maraboli

Is a good leader a good follower?

A very good leader has come up from the trenches. They have been recipients of the good and the bad in leadership and should have learned valuable lessons as to which works better and how to apply it.

How do I give some advice to people who get easily offended?

Ask them if they’re up for it. If they’re not, don’t offer it.

Why do people always feel like they are entitled to others’ respect?

They’re usually the ones who deserve it less. You get what you give, so if you don’t give it, don’t expect to get it. I run into this with people that have higher degrees, and I’m so not impressed.

“I’m a doctor with 12 years of college, and I deserve your respect.”

“I’m Joe Bag’a’doughnuts and I can kill you with a paperclip, college boy. But, you should know this, having a medical degree, and all.” 

How does one integrate while keeping one’s identity?

“Integrate” with people who value individualism. 

Why do I dress up like a loser sometimes?

Incognito? I usually do it to be ignored by others. There is always that "chance encounter" with a woman who is attracted to losers, however.

“Maybe the truth is, there's a little bit of loser in all of us. Being happy isn't having everything in your life be perfect. Maybe it's about stringing together all the little things.”

-- Ann Brashares

What is the difference between stupid and immature?

One is acting very young, and one is acting very ignorant.

Are all keyboard warriors cowards in real life?

Nope. I would not assume this. I’m on the keyboard quite a bit, but I’m also a collector of bowie knives and semi-automatic weapons. I’m familiar with judo, interrogation techniques, and bringing a nuclear weapon to a knife fight. I never assume cowardice, even of the humble. 

Do you love yourself more or your soul?

I am my soul.

Are adults actually better at handling emotions than children, or are most adult emotions simply less intense?

Ha! Don’t we wish? Some adults are simply children who learned to control their emotions. Other adults still suffer from emotional outbursts. Personally, I think they have outbursts because they know there’s no “adult” around, threatening to staple their lips to the floor if they don’t calm down. Just saying.

Who do you think are the people responsible for good behavior?

The “Good Behavior Nazis” usually come out of the woodwork, thinking they’re all that.  They really aren't.  We only have ourselves to be responsible for.  Do a good job.

“Manners and politeness will never become old-fashioned.”

-- Auliq Ice

Why does no one want to be told what to do for any reason?

They prefer to be self-employed, which will be a disaster since they haven’t learned to do anything right from anyone who cared. 

Why are there so many sheeple that cant critically think and need everything spoonfed?

What’s a sheeple?

Why don't I have a moral barrier? I deliberately want to violate it to make people angry.

I’d consider this an “antagonistic” barrier. A “moral” barrier would be lying, stealing, coveting, hitting on another man’s wife, grabbing someone’s ass, or “flashing” some woman on 5th Avenue.  Morally unacceptable behavior.

What would it be called when someone imagines an imaginary friend-type person (who does things like give them advice and talk to them) but they are actually a real person (a celebrity)?

Paracosm? Or, they simply have an imaginary friend, which really isn’t a bad thing for children as they develop communication and interpersonal skills earlier.

What are the best words of affirmation in your opinion so that you can build enthusiasm in your activities?

“Job well done. Keep up the good work.”

“Attitude is a choice. Happiness is a choice. Optimism is a choice. Kindness is a choice. Giving is a choice. Respect is a choice. Whatever choice you make makes you. Choose wisely.”

-- Roy T. Bennett

Is there any proof that people can change for the better?

Nazi Germany and Imperial Japan, governments and people, rose from the ashes of wars lost to be so very much better than they were.

Can we lie to make a point?

How can anyone believe anything we say, then?

When does a person decide to take more care of herself? Can somebody convince that person to do it?

They need to understand that if they can’t take care of themselves, how can they take care of others? I always fall back on airline safety briefings: “Put on your oxygen mask first, before assisting the passenger next to you.” Of what use are two dead passengers?

Why are people so ignorant and naive on [this site]?

Are you looking at the questions, the answers, or both?

Why do we want people we like to be right and don't listen to the reasons of others?

We are tribal. One would hope our own tribe has some good sense, or we’re all going to look pretty stupid. Good communication is the ability to listen to others with an open and active mind. To critique what they say and, perhaps grudgingly, be ready to accept good points while rejecting the bad.

“But being confident you are right is not the same as being right.”

-- Steven D. Levitt

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com