More Questions of Choice

“In the end that was the choice you made, and it doesn't matter how hard it was to make it. It matters that you did.”

-- Cassandra Clare

Moving for the first time, how do you decide what to keep? Things like a typewriter, sewing machine, piano, puzzles, etc, doubt I'll use them but don't know if I should get rid of them. Don't want clutter, but don't want to get rid of what I may need.

Moving is about downsizing. If a moving company is involved, you pay for everything you think you need, so you better really need it. Puzzles, no. Typewriter? No. Piano? Do you play it or is it for show? If you don’t play, then sell it. Pots and pans? How many do you really need? Clothes? If you haven’t worn it in a year, it goes.  I hate getting into my new digs and then finding out I kept too much.

This is a time when your personal rubber really hits the road. How much “crap” do you really want to haul around, not use, then haul around again? You might also consider the donation writeoff for taxes, and what you really need to buy new after the move.

Having been in the military really teaches you about hauling crap and purchasing quality. Minimalist quality beats the hell out of hoarding loads of crap.

Why am I hesitant to use social media?

We should all be. It can be a wasteland, usually, or a useful tool. Choose wisely. 

How are you going to be a good communicator? Can you please give an example?

I had to give Intelligence briefings, to aircrews and commanders, while in the military. I had to learn public speaking and briefing techniques, and then I had to teach them to new personnel. I had to be one hell of a communicator, or people might die.

“Listen with curiosity. Speak with honesty. Act with integrity. The greatest problem with communication is we don’t listen to understand. We listen to reply. When we listen with curiosity, we don’t listen with the intent to reply. We listen for what’s behind the words.”

-- Roy T. Bennett

Why do some refuse to make decisions about tough aspects of their life? What is it which makes ignoring it in the hope it will go away (or pretending issues don't exist or aren't somehow real) a better option than dealing with the problem and moving on?

It is an option, but not a “better” option. Ignoring it is no guarantee it will “go away.” The better option is dealing with problems head-on before moving on down your path. Dealing with these things builds our character and teaches us how to make good choices and decisions in life.

How grateful are you that you can live in relative safety and freedom?

Very grateful, and I will die to protect it from all enemies, foreign and domestic.

Why should we possess the core values of the university, excellence, integrity, social responsibility, collaboration, respect?

It depends if the “core values” are also the good moral core values of the country you love. The “core values” of Hitler's Germany reflected all you’ve listed, but the values were not all-inclusive of the population as “social responsibility” meant certain segments of society were destined for slave labor and, eventually, the ovens. Hate is not a moral “core value.” 17 million people were victims of Nazi “core values.”

“True leaders don't look at just the outward appearances in the selection of team members, they look at one's core values and heart.”

-- Farshad Asl

What are the negative effects of wishful thinking?

If “wishful thinking” makes you stop working toward a goal and, instead, makes you hope the goal simply comes to you.

How do you overcome the barriers to equality and inclusion?

Be the light. Practicing equality and inclusion is a practical solution and takes very little effort. Those who want, will. Those who don’t, won’t. Your “circle” will be sans barriers and will slowly expand as it is all-inclusive. Groups with names that are not all-inclusive have no right to claim they are. Better to have a name that includes the welfare of all people than just one group.

Why would someone run their mouth and give a nasty attitude over the phone but get timid in person?

If there’s a fence between you and a bully, why not get your shots in now, before he beats the crap out of you? When someone “isn’t in your face” a false sense of bravery can control your mouth. Being “timid” in person might make them think it will stave off the ass-whipping. Not. Better to just be reasonable at all times and be the example for others to follow.

“Pride is nothing more than false courage without long-term solutions.”

-- Shannon L. Alder

How can anyone be a good person when we all have varying definitions of what is moral?

Just like a good person truly being good, morality is also not open to varying definitions. You either are moral or you aren’t. You have the right to choose, but that doesn’t mean your choice is morally right.

How do I live happy no matter what?

Make the conscious choice to do so, and then live up to your choice. Strive to be happy always. Life is what it is until it isn’t, so why not be happy in the meantime? If you have a choice between happiness and misery, choose happiness. You will rarely be disappointed.

Why does your past chase you wherever you go?

Because we let it. When do you finally take a stand and make people understand the past is behind you and what is at hand is of more concern. If you’ve learned from past mistakes, paid your dues, it is time for everyone to move on. Strive to be happy always, regardless of the past.

“Maturity is when you stop complaining and making excuses, and start making changes.”

-- Roy T. Bennett

And... the short answers: 

 

What hobby will you never understand the appeal of?

Free solo climbing. 

 Is being childish immature?

It kind of answers itself.

What are the things that inspire you?

Art, beauty, a child's innocence, and ethical conduct.

Did the U.S. achieve its real goals in Afghanistan?

Is Afghanistan safe in the hands of terrorist criminals?

What is the most successful type of personality in humans?

What is success without happiness?

Is it a good thing one of my decisions in life is to pick the side of the people as a whole against the world's governments?

When you finally win, who will govern the world?

Which is better, work hard or work happy?

Work hard, and be happy doing it.

Reader comment:  I am a former champion sportsman Tony, I was involved in my sport for 39 years, I practiced/worked on average 30 hours per week, and believe me if you will I never found it hard, instead I thoroughly enjoyed it, loved it. To me hard work is a chore, best to be avoided at all costs if able to.

My reply:  That’s the point. If you enjoy what you do, if you’re happy in it, then how hard it is, is of no consequence. Hard work is not a chore, it becomes a pleasure.

“Every job from the heart is, ultimately, of equal value. The nurse injects the syringe; the writer slides the pen; the farmer plows the dirt; the comedian draws the laughter. Monetary income is the perfect deceiver of a man's true worth.”

-- Criss Jami

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as a chaplain at the regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com