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Friday, September 20, 2024

Friends Along Our Path (Reprinted and updated from October 1, 2015)

 

The Path

This is my path.
It is not your path, it is mine.
Good or bad, it is my path.
I must travel my path alone.

That is your path.
It is not mine or theirs, it is yours.
Good or bad, it is your path.
You must travel your path alone.

At times our paths might intersect
Or, run parallel for a while.
We will visit, laugh, and cry.
Exchange experiences and offer advice.

At some point, we may part
Perhaps to join up again
As our destination is the same
And our journey is long.

I wish for you a smooth path,
And a long and interesting journey
Full of emotion and life,
Family and friends.

We will not arrive together,
At the final destination,
But I will wait for you, my friend,
As I know you will wait for me.
-- F.A. Villari

For more times than I can count, I have received requests to reprint the above poetry. And, now, the post as well.  I edited the grammar a bit, as I always do.  Since its first publication, on October 1, 2015, this post still ranks as my most read. I hadn't realized that nine years had passed.  

I've been noticing that time seems to slip by faster as I get older.  But, as I always say, time is nothing more than a human concept.  Therefore, as my mother lied to me when she turned 30, for the umteenth time, I too have decided to stop aging and let our concept of time do as it pleases.  But, as I approach 71, I bemoan it took me more years than her, to make this logical decision.

I used to write poetry back in the late 1970s. I abandoned the habit after accumulating a "book" of it, which I believed, at the time, was much too personally insightful.  Needless to say, one morning I "accidentally Ollie North'd" the collection. I shredded it, along with the past week's classified intelligence message traffic.  I've often wondered if there was a subconscious intent, those many years ago, possibly due to my personal life being in the toilet.

I have tried to start writing poetry again, but that particular muse is a shadowy phantom loath to manifest itself more so, it would seem, the older I get.  I am equally loathed to allow anyone the opportunity to breach the protective walls of my redoubt.  Not very often, however, my heart or mind will overcome my lack of material, or another "special" individual will spark the tinder of my creative furnace.

This verse is much more telling of my mental state, having discovered, with age, that life presents so much elephant feces I really don't need to waste energy on, not the least of which are those comments that spew forth from the pie holes of those countless members of the League of the Perpetually Offended.  What is my attitude about this apparent "waste of humanity" that tries to insinuate itself into my life?  I simply try not to care about their "perpetual petty selfishness" and humbly ask them to get off my path, so I might continue enjoying the same peace I wish for them.

I find poetry, like art, is a matter of taste.  To the poet, like the artist, they are trying to communicate as much to themselves as to others.  To the academic community, poetry is defined in multi-syllable "let me show you how much smarter I am than you" speak; so few of us "commoners" understand it:
Poetry is a form of literature that uses aesthetic and rhythmic qualities of language—such as phonaesthetics, sound symbolism, and metre — to evoke meanings in addition to, or in place of, the prosaic ostensible meaning.
Poetry uses forms and conventions to suggest differential interpretation to words, or to evoke emotive responses. Devices such as assonance, alliteration, onomatopoeia, and rhythm are sometimes used to achieve musical or incantatory effects. The use of ambiguity, symbolism, irony, and other stylistic elements of poetic diction often leaves a poem open to multiple interpretations. Similarly, figures of speech such as metaphor, simile, and metonymy create a resonance between otherwise disparate images—a layering of meanings, forming connections previously not perceived. Kindred forms of resonance may exist, between individual verses, in their patterns of rhyme or rhythm.
-- Wikipedia, "Poetry"
Well, reading the "Wikipedia" definition of poetry, makes me want to immediately run out to my local bookseller for some interesting poetry to read. The definition gives some credence to Socrates who once said, "I decided that it was not wisdom that enabled poets to write their poetry, but a kind of instinct or inspiration, such as you find in seers and prophets who deliver all their sublime messages without knowing in the least what they mean."  

I think most of us have a general idea what Socrates meant, and what poetry is; if it looks like a duck, swims like a duck, and quacks like a duck, it probably is a duck, unless its Japanese "haiku," which makes my eyes cross and allows drool to run freely down my chin as I lose control of my bladder.  Haiku is best read after smoking some "mind-altering" herb or drinking several double tumblers of bourbon. I mean, if you're going be comatose after reading it anyway, you might as well enjoy killing the brain cells.

Have you ever wondered why we remember only snippets of famous poems?  More than five or six quatrains, those four-line stanzas, is about all I can stomach, much less try to remember.  Like an "all-you-can-eat" casino buffet, it seems better to just indulge in the delicious "meat" of poetic verse, the interesting substance, than to drown in the carbohydrates that surround it?  I think this is probably the way most of us think, and why we latch onto the most meaningful verse, as in Robert Burns' poem, "A Red, Red Rose"
"O my Luve is like a red, red rose
That’s newly sprung in June;
O my Luve is like the melody 
That’s sweetly play'd in tune."

Those of us, who received a "quality" education, will remember this verse. But, can anyone remember the rest of it?  It isn't all that long, as poems go. And yet, the entirety escapes many of us.  In this way, I think, poetry truly reflects our lives as we travel our path.  We remember the interesting meat of it, but the fluff seems to fall by the wayside.  When it comes to remembering people, however, we seem to be even less discerning, a trait I recognize and, yet, also fall prey to.

Referencing the photo at the beginning of this post: Which of the three would you be more apt to remember, the cute little girl, the loyal friend, or the jackass?  Perhaps there is a member of the League of the Perpetually Offended who is most memorable for you.

The truth is, anyone we meet can be a friend along our path, as long as we are willing to treat them as we would want to be treated.  With enough tolerance, love, and understanding, even the jackass among us, like myself, can be seen as a worthy friend, and might even find a gentler path for them, due to our ministries.  But, many of whom we meet, are destined for the fluff pile because we just don't seem to have the time, or won't make time, to allow them a chance to become a cherished memory, a permanent part of our memory, our life, and our journey.  Even those we are aware that we should probably take time to know better, are simply passed up, like vegetables at a buffet, in favor of the all-you-can-eat crab, shrimp, or London broil.

I think I'll go out and make a conscious effort to meet someone new, possibly at an inexpensive buffet. With any luck, they might shake up my inner poetic self.  But, the real gift, as often overlooked, will be the memory of meeting them, like so many others along my journey. 

The challenge for each of us is to make time for our fellows. It takes such little effort to try it. Make the effort, for yourself, and for others. As a matter of fact, try making an effort daily to make a new acquaintance. Whether they become a friend or not, your life and theirs will be all the richer for having known each other and for having made the effort.
“If you go looking for a friend, you’re going to find they’re scarce. If you go out to be a friend, you’ll find them everywhere.”
-- Zig Ziglar

Editor's Note
(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)


Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.
Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.
Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Thursday, September 19, 2024

Questioning Lies, Crap, Bored, Happiness, Compliments, and Association

“There is beauty in truth, even if it's painful. Those who lie, twist life so that it looks tasty to the lazy, brilliant to the ignorant, and powerful to the weak. But lies only strengthen our defects. They don't teach anything, help anything, fix anything, or cure anything. Nor do they develop one's character, one's mind, one's heart or one's soul.”
-- José N. Harris

 

What if every lie you told immediately became true? How would that change the way you communicate?
I would lie about the most beautiful women having sex with me, and I’d lie about my income. I’m already truly happy, so… sex and money? Can you ask for more? My girlfriend will be pissed.
What is the biggest challenge you have faced in your life?

Air Force Basic Training, in December of 1972. College was a breeze.

Do most couples have sex once a month?
It depends on the age. Young couples have it once a week, minimum. As you get older, things tend to calm down a bit. As you navigate the 50s, some bodily “spread” complicates things.
Would you be happy if you were suddenly given everything you ever wanted in life?
I already have it, and I’m truly happy.
Why do people say life begins at 50?
You are usually testing the waters, until 50, even in marriage. After 50 things tend to settle down… a bit. You found what you like to do, and who you’d like to do it with. Or, who you’d like to do and with what choice of toys.
Why are ethical codes important?
A personal ethical code defines who you are. It defines how ethical you are going to be.
“Education without values, as useful as it is, seems rather to make man a more clever devil.”
-- C.S. Lewis
Do stupid bitches like you spend your life getting revenge on people because you can’t bear the fact that you were born a piece of crap?
Stupid bitches like me don’t worry about getting revenge on people, regardless that I was born a piece of crap. Revenge is infintile. So, this is your idea of a serious question? 
Why is watching video lectures boring?
It depends on how interested you are in the video lecture.
We don't get what we want in life and we get what we don't want! Why?
If you make all the right choices, life delivers the pizza of your choice. If you make bad choices, life delivers crap. Make better choices so life will be your oyster, with a big pearl. Or, pizza. Your choice.
Why can't my life be happy like everybody else?
Bad choices and decisions.
I have asked over 100 questions on Quora in 5 days. What should I do?
You have 80 more to go. I have answered 180 questions in 5 days. If you can ask 180, you will tie with me. 
Would you have more respect for someone who was always honest with you without any facade or someone who lied to you and was pretending?
Gee… let me think.
“Friendship- my definition- is built on two things. Respect and trust. Both elements have to be there. And it has to be mutual. You can have respect for someone, but if you don't have trust, the friendship will crumble.”
-- Stieg Larsson

 When I am on vacation I am bored, and wishing I was at work. But, when I am at work I am aggravated, tired, and wish I was on vacation. Why?

Jesus… get a grip.
Why are your questions such a waste of time?
I don’t ask questions, so your question seems to be targeting a lot of the wrong people. Do you always target the wrong people with your questions? If true, it would seem your questions are such a waste of time. 
What’s a question you’ve always wanted to ask but never have?
“Why?” And, just to let you know, “Because,” is not the answer.
Why do stupid people get angry when they can't understand something?
They aren’t stupid. They are angry because they are ignorant. This is why they can’t understand something. No one is truly stupid... unless they ask the same question more than once.
Are you a human being or just being human?
Are you an illegal alien, or just an alien?
How can you be your own reason to smile?
When I wake up in the morning, I smile. I am my “own reason to smile.” It is a great feeling to be on this side of the dirt.
"Give yourself a reason to smile; the reasons may grow and grow."
-- Susan Lax
Can people have different definitions of happiness and still be happy?
Yes, as long as they do, and feel, their definition of happiness.
Do humans want humans to believe that humans created humans?
Well, that is the second most ignorant thing I’ve ever heard. Aliens are most likely the scientific genius behind the scenes when mankind was created.
What can men do that women cannot?
Hold their own penis.
What would happen if I didn't know that you know that I know?
Nothing. There is no reason for me to let the secret out so you can know that I know that you know. Until you discover the secret, I will keep it close to the vest. 
What does it mean when a guy sleeps with a woman on a first date?
She is so easy. Or, she is so horney. Either way, the guy gets lucky on the first date.
What is nothing? Nothing can exist?
Nothing exists as a term denoting, well… nothing. It is really not accurate. Even in an absolute vacuum, there are still particles that exist. Quantum particles, if I’m right, might be passing through a “total” vacuum. Not being a physicist, the terms I use might be wrong.
"When the province of physical theory was extended to encompass microscopic phenomena through the creation of quantum mechanics, the concept of consciousness came to the fore again. It was not possible to formulate the laws of quantum mechanics in a fully consistent way without reference to the consciousness."
-- Eugene Wigner 
Why don’t I get any compliments from my boyfriend?
Why is he still your boyfriend? If this were a marriage, there would be a divorce in the planning stage. Any relationship should have compliments, even from same-sex partners. If you aren’t getting them, you should be asking yourself why.
How should I understand 'sometimes ever, sometimes never'?
It is what it is. Sometimes it is, and sometimes it isn’t. Learn to deal with the reality of it.

What is the concept of nothing becoming something?
Creatio ex nihilo ("creation from nothing"). This is the best I can come up with. I point you to Wikipedia: Creatio ex materia
How can someone break the cycle of generational trauma and poor parenting?
Be a good parent. 
Why can't humanity stop having war?
Greed. If mankind can conquer greed, they will see a world of peace. Unfortunately, not in my lifetime, or my son’s lifetime, or my grandchild’s. Greed will be with us forever. The best we can do is learn to live together in peace. Yeah, good luck with that. 
How long can a human ponder on one thought?
It depends on the human.
“We all know that light travels faster than sound. That's why certain people appear bright until you hear them speak.”
-- Albert Einstein 
Why would someone want to associate themselves with brilliant people who are very unkind?
They have no good, solid, ethics. These people want to get ahead.
Should I beat up boring people?
Yeah, there is a good use of your time. The “boring” person will probably be a kung fu master. You’ll get your ass beat, which will really be funny considering you have wasted your time beating up a boring person.
What habits have had the most positive impact on your life?

 Meditation. For every free minute, there is time for meditation. It keeps me truly happy.

Is anger the antidote to boredom forever?
If anger is your antidote to boredom, you need a hobby. The antidote to boredom is to find something, or someone, to do. Anger is not the “go-to” for everything.
I don't know when to react. How do you measure something serious and something silly?
Carry a 6″ ruler with you. Nothing is that serious, and most things are that silly.
How do you handle unexpected interruptions or urgent requests while keeping your planned tasks on track?
If you’re good, you have time scheduled for interruptions and urgent requests. This is the sign of someone who has been on the “short” more than once. You learn, and you plan. Not everything goes according to plan. You need to be able to take care of most things on the run. this is how you get the big bucks.
Reader comment: You're right, having flexibility and a buffer for unexpected things is key. It’s definitely a skill that comes with experience, especially when you’ve faced those situations multiple times. I’m working on building that kind of balance, where I can handle surprises without derailing planned tasks. Definitely aiming for that level where I can manage it all and keep things running smoothly.
“The best schedule is one that is adapting to change.”
-- Tamerlan Kuzgov
Editor's Note
(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)


Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.
Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.
Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com  

Questioning Evil, Strength, Schizophrenia, Growth, Trash, and Money

“If only it were all so simple! If only there were evil people somewhere insidiously committing evil deeds, and it were necessary only to separate them from the rest of us and destroy them. But the line dividing good and evil cuts through the heart of every human being. And who is willing to destroy a piece of his own heart?”
-- Aleksandr Solzhenitsyn

What do evil beings doubt, and why?
The omnipotent power of God. Evil thinks they are all that. They are not.
I want to give up my life as a sacrifice, a punishment for my sins. How do I do it?
You can give up your life to God, at the end of your time on this planet. I would recommend you clean up your act. If you work on making your sins right, you might not need the sacrifice, you are so eager to give.
Is it fair to say, a person's life gets as complicated as the person lets it be?
Indeed.
Have you ever made the right and honest decision, but, things still turned out bad?
Yes, and I apologized to the airman. I had no choice. I made the right decision. He shouldn’t have put me in the position to risk my rank.
How do you find peace, amid chaos?
If you ignore “chaos,” is it important to you? It's better to ignore chaos and focus on peace. 
How do I check, if I truly understand a concept or topic, specifically in studying?
Have someone ask you questions concerning the concept or the topic. Make sure you explain your answer. Having the answer is not knowing the answer. Explaining the answer makes you excellent.
“Any fool can know. The point is to understand.”
-- Albert Einstein
How did you find strength in your darkest times?
My belief in “God” is a big help. During my divorce, I thought my life was over. She hurt me to the bone, and I contemplated ending it all. I looked up at the ceiling and it disappeared. I found myself in a realm I cannot describe, but it gave me a feeling of peace. There was a ladder, and as I grabbed onto it I realized it was the way out. There is always a way out. I found myself back in the room, staring at the ceiling. I started to smile, and I never looked back. That was 24 years ago. I divorced the anchor, and have been happy ever since. Was it a message? Probably. I thanked whoever sent it.
Reader comment: I’m glad you found yourself a way out of the black hole you were in. I’ve been there after my first heartbreak. I was barely an adult when I met him and he damn near destroyed not only my life but me, so I get it. It takes strength, determination, and the hutspa to be able to say to yourself “I’ve suffered enough. I’m done. It’s time to get my big girl or boy boots back on and rebuild my life. I’ve felt sorry for myself long enough”. Kudos to you. I’m proud of you. I hope that you were able to find a woman who is more deserving of you.

My reply: Thank you. 

Why do I always end up getting hurt?
You open yourself as a target. If you don’t put yourself in a compromising position you, probably, won’t get hurt. Stay in the background.
Can a person be accused of lying if they are not in a position to know the truth?
No, but they need to qualify their answer, so people know they aren’t certain. 
Why don't some people not care about socializing?
They aren’t “social” people. They weren’t “trained” to socialize with other people. We call the majority of them, “wallflowers.” I don’t care about socializing, but it isn’t that I don’t socialize, I just don’t care. If people want to socialize with me, I am open to it. If they don’t, it doesn’t bother me. My parents made sure I could do the social scene, I just don’t care about it.
Has God ever failed any tests?
He failed in the Garden of Eden, several times according to Genesis. But, was that God?
If you have a tendency to act, without thinking first, does that make you stupid? Or, in other words, are "impulsive" people stupid?
No, they might be ignorant, though. Many people were not trained by their parents to take a minute to consider all the options. Some people let the shock of realization guide them in the wrong direction, instead of considering other choices. It is always good to take a minute to think before you act.
“A fool is made more of a fool when their mouth is more open than their mind.”
-- Anthony Liccione
Are religious people just schizophrenic people?
No. That is an atheist comment that holds little water. It would be akin to a theist saying that atheists are stupid. Neither side can prove their belief, so both sides need to shut up. Just saying.
What do you do if you have the mind of a maniac?
I will do “maniacal” things. Is this another trick question?
If you could erase one emotion from the collective human experience, both its positive and negative aspects, which one would you choose, and how would it reshape society?
Not one. Emotions train us to live life. Erasing one of the emotions will unbalance life. There will be mental issues with people. One needs to leave “balance” alone.
My 15-year-old brother does not like to take advice, even if you're speaking to him calmly. What should I do?
Let him fail. Life is all about learning, and failing is the best way to learn.
Yes, my father is smarter than me, but I do not care. I am more stubborn and need to do things my way. How do I tell him to stop meddling even if he is right?
Tell him that life is all about learning. His meddling is not helping you to learn the painful lessons. Explain this to him, and tell him you will come for his sage advice after you fail, several times, and can’t move forward.
What should you do if half of the world obviously wants you dead?
They need to bring it. I haven’t trained a large class in a while. It will be fun.
''When everyone wanted you dead, I kept you alive! And this is how you repay my love? You hurt me, brother, you hurt me.''
-- "Vikings"
When, in your life, were you concerned that you were not growing enough as a person?
Before I joined the Air Force. The Vietnam conflict brought reality into my 19-year-old brain. I grew up fast and served for 23 years. I loved the Intelligence field.
What would happen, if I know that you know that I know?
We will, in all probability, drink bourbon and discuss it.
The atheist in my class died. What should I do?
If you are a theist, pray for his soul. Atheists may not like us, but we are supposed to be above their dislike. Pray for the atheist. If nothing else, it will piss them off.
Reader comment: For the most part, atheists do not dislike theists. But since you’re the sort of theist who enjoys the idea of “pissing them (atheists) off”, they may dislike YOU.

My reply: They won’t be the first, and, likely, not be the last.
A Christian is drowning. What should I do?
What would you do if a non-Christian is drowning? You would do what is moral and right.
Is it stupid to apologize to the dead?
Apologizing to the dead is a declaration that you might have been wrong. It is growing past what you were into something more accepting of other people you might not like. It sounds a bit off, but, it is a sign of maturity to apologize. You might think of doing it while they are alive. It will mean so much more.
What can change your perspective about something that has happened to you or someone close to you in the past or present day?
When I learned that I was wrong. Learning is why we were born. I learn constantly.
“There is no end to education. It is not that you read a book, pass an examination, and finish with education. The whole of life, from the moment you are born to the moment you die, is a process of learning.”
-- Jiddu Krishnamurti 
Did you know, that you, the reader of this question, is a useless bit of trash?
No more than the author, and probably less. The author wasted time typing this tripe, as I did the answer.
How will you make your day better?
By not answering idiots trying to piss me off. I have had two this morning.
I did horrible things but hid it all because I wanted to be „secret“. I felt so good while doing it and thought I am in the right. Now 4 month later I remember everything I did. How do people change?
You become selfless in everything you do. You apologize to God for everything you did against true happiness. If you are sincere in your apology, you might be on the “right” track. If you are sincere, then the change has already occurred. You need to change everything you have done that is bad. Yeah, it is a bitch, but it is what will put everything straight.
What is it that you are really here for?
Learning. And teaching what I’ve learned.
What's the point of living if you're just going to die?
If you’re not one who believes this is the only life, then there are possibilities. If you believe that you’re going to die, and that’s it, then so be it. They will try to capture your memories, and you are done. But. if you believe in a life after this one…
Why doesn't my girlfriend want to tell me something that is important to her?
She believes you are shallow. Great in bed, but so shallow.
“Ignorance is the choice not to know what you don’t want to know, assuming that the absence of knowing causes the absence of the existence of that which you don’t want to know. Therefore, the belief in the ability of ignorance to achieve its goal is likely the greatest ignorance of all.”
-- Craig D. Lounsbrough
What is one thing better than money?
Gold, silver, and gemstones. Gold and silver have appreciated manifold, as have gemstones.
What causes people to switch from being nice to mean?
They assume fire must be fought with fire. If you have a large group fighting each other, a fire hose will work wonders. It is a waste trying to fight with fire. When does it stop?
How do you judge a book, if not by its cover?
By the story, it tells. It can have no cover, but the story is why you are reading.
Is it worth it trying to change this world better, for all humanity, or do we just give up?
It is worth it, to someone. If we all gave up, what would the world look like? It is grace that we have artists that make the world a prettier place. If we all made one thing better, we would see a great change in the world.
What is the meaning of life without pleasure and pain? Is it possible to live without experiencing any pleasure or pain?
You can, but you will not know about pleasure or pain. The point of our life here is to learn.
My mother said that if I were to let someone live rent-free in my head and waste my life thinking about someone who doesn't think about me, then the only loser is me. Is this true?
I think about people all the time. Most of them don’t know me. They usually have short skirts. I’m not a loser, because I appreciate my smile while I look. Your mother may be right, for you. Then again, she could be wrong. You are only a loser if you define yourself as one. I will continue looking at women in short skirts… and smile.
“Those skirts are crunchy toast! Santana Lopez bent over in hers the other day, and I swear I could see her ovaries.”
-- R. Murphy, B. Falchuk, and I. Brennan

Editor's Note
(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)


Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.
Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.
Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Wednesday, September 18, 2024

Questioning Truth, Poor, Happiness, Spanking, Hate, and Humility

“I'm not upset that you lied to me, I'm upset that from now on I can't believe you.”
-- Friedrich Nietzsche


What if you could only speak the truth for the rest of your life? How would your relationships change?
At the age of 70, I see no reason to lie. It is what it is.
What are some reasons people fail to achieve their goals, despite putting in effort? How can one prevent this from happening?
They aren’t educated, enough, to achieve their goals, regardless of their effort. To prevent this from happening, get educated about the goals you’d like to attain.
What if every human was born with one inherent skill or talent? What should it be?
Communication.
Are you afraid to get older? How does that fear impact the decisions that you make?
No. At 70 years of age, death does not scare me. I would prefer not to go. but it is the cycle of life. It only impacts the decisions for my kids and what happens when I pass, that’s it. There is no fear in it. Dad passed with his 4th stroke. Mom passed with a fraction of her mind intact. I will pass, God willing, fast and painlessly. But, it is what it is.
Why do people who have everything in life want more?
Greed.
Which is better, a truth that hurts or a lie?
The truth that hurts, is better than a lie. At least I know the truth.
“If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.”
-- Mark Twain
Am I evil if I think the poor should be sterilized?
It is kind of “Nazi” of you.
Why do I feel so stupid the second I get something wrong?
You aren’t stupid, you are ignorant. Learn what you got wrong and you won’t be so ignorant. It is a choice.
How can I tell my customers, "Thank you for your interest." Or, should I say, "Thank you for being interested."?

Do it with a smile, and either one works. You are being cordial by saying either one. 

What is a communication habit you’ve found most effective in resolving conflicts?
Ask all parties to explain their choice, and why it is right. Then, do what you think is right, which may not be any of the choices. It will end the conflict, though, and that would be the entire point of resolving.
Is it possible for God to have any regrets as a parent?
Too late. He already has regrets. Read “Genesis.”
I always expect too much from people in general. How do you only work on your goals and stay unaffected?

For one thing, “expecting” anything from someone else is asking for failure. The only person you can rely on is you. And even that can be dicey.
“My expectations were reduced to zero when I was 21. Everything since then has been a bonus."
-- Stephen W. Hawking
How do I fill my life with happiness?
Strive for true happiness always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances. If you do this simple thing, your life will change dramatically. It is a good choice you will make for your life and the lives around you.
Atheists, why are you so dumb?

Theists, why are you so dumb? Name-calling gives no one credit, especially name-callers.

The atheist in my class got a 14/88 on a math test. Why are atheists so dumb?
You will find that people, in general, are pretty ignorant. Neither atheists nor theists can prove their belief, so how intelligent is that?
Can worrying about other people's lives be a sign of low self-esteem?
No, it is a sign of selfless caring, not necessarily a sign of low self-esteem.
How can I set realistic fitness goals?
If you haven’t put your health in jeopardy, you have “realistic” fitness goals. However, “realistic” may not keep you fit. You should have goals that sinc to your age and abilities. A fitness trainer, or a book that addresses your age and fitness, is a good idea.
What's the purpose of feeling proud?
To boost the ego. However, according to the Bible, “pride” is looked down upon.
“All men make mistakes, but a good man yields when he knows his course is wrong, and repairs the evil. The only crime is pride.”
-- Sophocles
Do religious people spank their children?
Spare the rod, you spoil the child. Just saying.
How hard is it for you to keep yourself happy?
It's not that hard. The only time I had problems was when I was married. Before that, and since then, I have been a happy camper. I may get aggravated at drivers not paying attention, but, other than that…
What can you say about myself today?
You think that everybody knows you.
Do you think it's stupid to act stupid for the purpose of seeing someone's behavior towards you?
It’s pretty ignorant to act “stupid” just to see how someone treats you. If I showed you kindness and found out you were gaming me, I’d be pissed. Doing this "behavior" is a way to get no one to trust you.
How do you know when you’ve found ‘the right one’?
The “right one” what? You haven’t given us any context to “the right one.”
What percentage does the church you belong to compare to your "personal" relationship with God? Which one is greater and why?
I gave up “church” many years ago. I have adopted my definition of spirituality to take its place. God and I have a stronger relationship than we had before. Some say God gave up on man, and let man set his course. If this is true, I haven’t given up on God… not by a long shot.
“Spiritual pain is when you can’t stand another moment not knowing the real truth, and when you finally do know you can’t let go.”
-- Shannon I. Alder
What type of hate do you tolerate in your life?
I do not tolerate hate, not in my life or anybody else’s. Hate is contrary to understanding.
What opinion did you think was good and then changed over the days?
When I first joined the Air Force, I thought a new supervisor made much sense. Over time, however, my opinion changed. He didn’t know his nose from his asshole, and the rest of us could. The Intelligence commander replaced him… before we hurt him.
In general, do you agree with college professors whose cheating & plagiarism policies state that the 1st offense is an automatic "0" for the entire course?
Yes. Cheating and plagiarism should not be tolerated. I’d throw them out of the college.
How important is privacy for the creation of good ideas that help everyone, and don't involve self-mutilation?
“Good ideas” and “self-mutilation” are at opposite ends of the spectrum. "Privacy" might give you good ideas, but having a “team effort” can also help.
Why are people still following religions?
It is easier than striking out on your own.
Why did I exist in this world?
If you exist to your potential, you might be able to help us out. If not, I’m not sure why you’re here.
“Do not let the memories of your past, limit the potential of your future. There are no limits to what you can achieve on your journey through life, except in your mind.”
-- Roy T. Bennett
What's a way to say "I'm humble" without saying "I’m humble"?
Keep your head bowed, smile, and say nothing. Being humble is not something you need to explain.
Do you always make all your choices wisely, Sir?
At the ripe old age of 71, I hope I do. 
What is the purpose of having problems in our lives? Is it possible to live without them?
One needs to understand why we are here. We are here to learn. Our lives present problems that we need to solve. In solving problems, we learn, which is the basic reason for our existence. You can exist without problems, but you will not learn as much as your potential will allow.
What is something you can't replace, no matter what?
People. You can get another one, but it won’t be the same one you lost, no matter what.
Should you be construed as "old" at the age of 64?
Yeah, but not as old as 71. Age creeps up on you. At 71, I take a long walk at 3:00 in the morning. It keeps me limber and, hopefully, healthy. I expect to live into my 90s. 
What are the consequences for individuals who wish to be forgotten?
If they become hermits, they will be forgotten, as best we can.
“I've never stopped; I simply forgot that I love you. However, every time I look at you I'm reminded of how I can never stop loving you.”
-- Hafsa Shah
Editor's Note
(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)


Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.
Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.
Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Tuesday, September 17, 2024

Questioning Relationships, Gay, Life, Peace, God, and Humans

"It is better to have loved and lost, than never to have loved at all."
-- Alfred Lord Tennyson


I started a relationship 2 days after knowing him (we really liked each other's vibes). Am I too stupid?
Ask this question a couple of months from now. Or, you will probably know. 
Why do men hate slutty girls?
I do not hate slutty girls. I’m 70 years old, and I’ve never hated slutty girls. They are the elixir that keeps me young.
How should I behave when dating a mature guy?
I was just answering a question about “slutty girls” and how they keep old guys young.
Can being happy be a sign of good mental health?
Absolutely! You should strive to be truly happy always, and in all things, regardless of your circumstances. It is a choice for your life.
Should men love less beautiful girls? Less beautiful girls are honest.
They also try harder. I love them.
What is the term for someone who constantly criticizes their partner?
Lacking… on so many levels. The partner should be slapped, left alone, or told off. This is pitiful behavior for a partner.
"Never let hard lessons harden your heart; the hard lessons of life are meant to make you better, not bitter."
-- Roy T. Bennett
I think my husband might be gay. What are some sure signs I am right?
STDs. Do you have one?
Why do most single girls enjoy dating married men?
Of course. They pay nothing, are taken to the best restaurants, and are wined and dined. What single girl wouldn’t want to be pampered like that?
What do you respond, if people say, "Stop looking at me."?
“I’m sorry, but, you’re the only person worth looking at. Let me introduce myself...”
Why do some women feel offended when their husband offers to cook for them?
Some women are like that. Most women I know are happy if the man wants to cook. Especially, if you know what you’re doing. Being a humble man, I will not boast about my abilities.
What do you call a person who is always in a hurry?
Late.
Who is credited with saying, "Poverty is not created by wealth, but by greed."?
Mahatma Gandhi. Kind of. His quote is:  
“There's enough on this planet for everyone's needs, but not enough for everyone's greed.”
-- Mahatma Gandhi 
Does Life Is Beautiful have a sad ending?
Only if you are bad writer.
Can kindness see through a veil of anger?
Yes. But… anger will destroy kindness… just because. It is what anger does. Calling it a “veil” is being kind to “murderers” of the truth. It needs to be shown what it is. Anger is damaging to any reasonable discussion.
What do you do if the answer needs more answers from the question?
Then, the question sucks.
Is democracy, atheism, materialism, and humanism making us an incentive of God?
Only those weak-minded people are buying into this. The strong-willed are ignoring the bullshit and are continuing to believe in the omnipresence of a God that created a universe for us to live in.
Why do young people today always seem to be looking for someone else to solve their problems?
Bad parenting. They should have been taught self-reliance.
If God hates LGBTQ people, why did he create me as one?
It makes you think, doesn’t it? God left us to find our way, and this is one of the ways. Is it wrong? Well, God doesn’t step in, does he? If the gay couple are God-fearing people, what does God have issues with it? God left us to find the road back to Him. The road seems to have detours.
“The question is not whether gay Christians exist. It's simply 'How will the church respond to them?”
-- Matthew Vines
What is the secret behind making peace with ourselves?
Honesty.
Why do some people use the word "but" when calling someone "dumb" or "stupid"? Is it possible to be both dumb and smart at the same time?
This is ignorant. You should not be calling people names. And, if you have to, use “ignorant” as your go-to. The only people being “dumb and stupid” are people who use this question to guide their actions.
Can I chain up my in-laws when leaving the house so I don’t have to worry about them touching my stuff?
No, but the fact you have stuff you are worried they might touch, is concerning.
Is there anyone in the world that is perfect?
No. There are those who come close to being excellent, but not perfect. They say that “God” is perfect. But, I have some questions concerning Genesis. Basically, nothing is perfect, in my eyes.
Why can't you reason like an adult?
I don’t know. It really pisses me off.
Can you share anything that you believe is true but is not real?
Anything that is not real is not true. But, I will share this little thought: I believe it is true, that anything that is not real cannot be true. Does this answer satisfy the question?
“Sometimes what you see is not real, and the reality is not what you see. Somewhere, between both these reasonings, resides a fact: Where there is a lack of trust and confidence, perception will always differ with reality.”
-- Ashish Patel
What would cause someone to not fully trust God?
Genesis.
How can one determine if God wants them to stop doing something?
No. God cut us loose to be what we are. If you are doing wrong, you should be aware of it and try your hardest not to do this thing. God gave us rules to live by. If we forsake those rules, we will pay the price with our eternal soul. It is what it is.
How do I let God know I know?
Tell Him. Look to the heavens and tell Him.
My husband slapped me for the first time. We loved each other for 4 years and got married 2 years back. What should I do now? This happened during a serious verbal fight. Also, he was crying and apologizing the whole night, yesterday?
You do nothing. He is “slapping himself” over the entire fight. What you can do, is remind him about Lorena Bobbitt. If he ever slaps you again, you will cut his penis off and chuck it from the car window while you’re driving. A husband who slaps his wife is very wrong. He needs to be told that fact.
Why am I feeling scared of God?
What have you done wrong, that you haven’t apologized for?
If God really loves us, why do we have sin?
Balance in the universe. Like night and day, there is good, and there is sin. There is always something to balance out something else. It is the way of life.
“In each of us lie good and bad, light and dark, art and pain, choice and regret, cruelty and sacrifice. We’re each of us our own chiaroscuro, our own bit of illusion fighting to emerge into something solid, something real. We’ve got to forgive ourselves that. I must remember to forgive myself. Because there is a lot of greys to work with. No one can live in the light all the time.”
-- Libba Bray 
Why do people categorize us introverts as humans? We eccentric introverts are above humanity. We are not even humans, especially for the simple fact that we are far better as people than all of humanity. We are intelligent. Humans are dumb apes.
Yeah, you’re a human.
What do you think about loyalty?
I try not to. 
What is the most uncomfortable thing to imagine?
Constipation. 
Why do I feel like I enjoy asking questions on [this site] just to divide people and cause chaos in the questions I asked? Does any asker on [this site] feel this way?
I’m sure there's more than one asshole on this site. I can't be the only other one.
When the word you is used in a question, why do you answer the question from other than the first person perspective?
I don’t think about it. I’ll leave this to you.
Why do people believe the lie that bullies pick on those who can't stand up for themselves? Everyone is afraid of the popular kids. Also, a lot of lone bullying targets actually fight back but it's usually them against a group or all of society.
You’ve never been the target of a bully. You’ve never been beat up because you’re smaller. It is only a lie for those who haven’t faced multiple bullies and had the shit kicked out of you, more than once.
“People who love themselves, don’t hurt other people. The more we hate ourselves, the more we want others to suffer.”
-- Dan Pearce
Editor's Note
(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)


Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.
Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.
Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com