Questioning Control, Failure, Truth, Flaws, Success, and Acceptance

“My house, my rules!”

-- Stephenie Meyer

I am 21 and my dad thinks he can control me and my life. I am currently not working so my dad feels like he can control me and put me down since I live with him. What do I do?

Move out. You live under his roof, you live under his rules.

Is Billy Flowers the source of infinite wisdom?

Is Billy Flowers a god? Probably not. So, it stands to reason, that he is not the source of infinite wisdom.

Do fools answer what they claim are foolish questions?

Yes. Someone has to do it, so I do it all the time. Damn me. 

Why do 95% of affiliate marketers fail and quit?

They don’t possess the trait of “perseverance” in the face of failure. If a marketer fails and quits, they shouldn’t have ever been a marketer. There is always the chance of failure in life. This is what life is all about, learning from failure, since failure is the best way we can learn. 

What is a question in a question?

“Do you know where he lives?” There are two questions, “Do you know?” and “Where he lives?”

What brings hope for 2024?

Faith. You must have faith or there will be no hope. Faith is the harbinger of hope.

“I believe that imagination is stronger than knowledge. That myth is more potent than history. That dreams are more powerful than facts. That hope always triumphs over experience. That laughter is the only cure for grief. And I believe that love is stronger than death.”

-- Robert Fulghum

What is the best way to deal with internalized guilt and shame?

The only way you can deal with it is to face it. If you feel guilty, maybe you need to apologize. If you feel shame, maybe you need to not do whatever you did, again. Whatever it is that you have internalized and you have to deal with, you need to let those affected know about it. Admission of what we have done wrong is a step toward maturity. The ability to admit you can make mistakes and own them.

If you know the truth, are you sometimes reluctant to admit it?

Nope. I have no filter.

What is the difference between pride, ego, and confidence? Which one is positive and which one is negative? Why?

Pride is confidence in one’s dignity, ego is one’s sense of self-esteem or self-importance, and confidence is self-assurance in one’s abilities. The only possible “negative” is the ego, when you put your “self-importance” up front and make yourself obviously “egotistical” to the chagrin of others.

Do you believe your insights?

For the most part. But, then, I critique my “insights” before believing them. 

Do you agree with the sentiment, "The average person sucks at everything"? Skills require coping with the disappointment of errors. People just stick to what makes them feel good and in control of the situation?

No, and I also don’t agree that people need to stick to what makes them feel good and in control. They will learn nothing doing this. I agree the majority need to learn to cope with disappointment and errors. 

What’s the most offensive, degrading insult you know of?

“You fu##ing worthless whore.”

 

In the military, I had to step into a “hornet’s nest” and ask the airman why he thought that insult was valid. It wasn’t valid, it was an insult he thought he needed to throw. He and I had a long discussion about why, as an airman, he shouldn’t be throwing insults at ladies, especially toward his wife. He broke down and went to apologize to her.

“We almost made it to thirty seconds without an insult. I think we set a new record.”

-- Sherrilyn Kenyon

What is the best way to tell someone that their judgment is flawed?

“I think your judgment is flawed, and this is why…” You can’t say they are wrong without giving them a reason why you think they are wrong.

Why do I like to make myself sound dumb even though I'm a genius who can prove God exists and therefore God exists because he exists?

There is no proof that God exists or not. This is why they call it faith. Faith is a belief in something for which there is little or no proof. Atheists and theists have no incontrovertible proof to support their beliefs, so they both have to fall back on faith. A “genius” would understand this.

Is faith in God’s existence any better than ignorance?

No more than faith in God’s non-existence is any better.

Why is death necessary for every living being?

Death is necessary for life to move forward. We can’t evolve if we continue to live. We live, we learn, we die, and we are born again to learn some more. It is a cycle that can be extended, but death always follows life. There must be balance in the universe.

What are ways in which the devil has deceived our society?

Abortion. Murder isn’t murder if you commit it with government permission.

Did you feel the magic of Christmas as a child? What made it special?

Yes! Santa Clause. The magic was gifts under the tree. When the Clause was proven to be false, learned the real spirit of the season. I fell back on selfless charity to keep the magic alive.

“Christmas magic is silent. You don't hear it---you feel it, you know it, you believe it.”

-- Kevin Alan Milne

What are some ways to succeed in life if you lack intelligence or talent? How can you compensate for these shortcomings?

Strive to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances. Happiness is the only true success in life.

Do people respect people that don’t have values?

If I didn’t have good values I wouldn’t expect them to respect me, no. Values define who we are. You can have good values and be respected by good people, or you can have bad values and have no respect. It is a choice each of us must make for our life. Having bad values defines people who are lost. 

How can we say that "I am a simple person" without sounding arrogant or boastful?

Say it with a humble tone.

Why do extremely stupid people use the phrase 'we the people'?

For the same reasons, extremely intelligent people use the phrase, it is the preamble of the Constitution of the United States. Granted, stupid people might not use it as much as those who are smart, but, then, the smart people don’t use it all that much, either.

Is killing children ever justified?

Only if they’re shooting at you or coming at you with a knife.

Is it possible to be moral without being intelligent, or vice versa? Can someone possess both qualities at the same time?

Morality has little to do with intelligence. A simple-minded person ton can be very moral, just as a serial killer can be very intelligent. One hopes to meet those good people who embrace both qualities of morality and smarts or intelligence.

“Waste no more time arguing about what a good man should be. Be one.”

-- Marcus Aurelius

What are the differences between "ideas", "concepts" and "knowledge"?

An “idea” can lead to a new “concept” that will only work if you have the “knowledge” to do it.

What are the best sarcastic replies to "I like you"?

Only an idiot would be sarcastic to a compliment.

Why did we all make poor decisions when we were young? How and where can we learn all experiences and wisdom from old people and not make many mistakes?

We make mistakes and poor decisions when we’re young so we can learn not to make them when they count. If you want to learn wisdom from “old people” you need to hang around “old people” and ask them their opinions. Most “old people” love it when people ask them their opinions. Hell, I’m 70 and I love to give my opinion. I have no filter.

Author's comment: That’s very nice of you. I wish some old people could create websites or YouTube channels and share their stories so we young can learn from those to not make similar mistakes anymore. I think I will create a community where youngsters can meet elders, listen, and learn from them.

My reply: Good idea!

Is it possible for someone to be confident in their intelligence without actually knowing anything?

Absolutely. They are deluding themselves, but they can do that, as well.

Why do you worship a false god who created nothing, but was created by clever and liar religious people?

You believe that a false god created nothing, but this “nothing” was actually created by clever liars from religion? I’ll buy into the “clever liars,” but, your belief in a “false god” is worrisome.

How can you stay hopeful while suffering if you believe that everything happens for a reason?

Because the “reason” is caused by us making a choice or decision in life.

“Sometimes a "mistake" can end up being the best decision you ever make.”

-- Mandy Hale

Why can't some people accept the truth?

They are in deep denial.

Why does God punish good people, and reward evil people?

Don’t put this on God. People make their fate, and then “karma” comes by and makes it right. Good people learn from the lessons presented to them. Evil ignores the lessons. Only one group can reserve a good seat in the next life.

How do you personally defeat evil?

By standing by having a moral code of ethics, and having the temerity to stand by them, no matter what.

Why do so many answers either begin with an insult to the questioner's intelligence or use 5th-level sarcasm?

For the most part, I’d address this question to the questioner.

What are the benefits and drawbacks of trusting one's judgment?

It depends on whether the person has good judgment, or if they’re an idiot. On the extreme drawback, there is death. On the extreme benefit, there is life. In between, there are variations on the theme. 

What is the origin of a human's wandering instinct?

Survival. Humans wander to better climates and plentiful food sources. 

“All living things contain a measure of madness that moves them in strange, sometimes inexplicable ways. This madness can be saving; it is part and parcel of the ability to adapt. Without it, no species would survive.”

-- Yann Martel

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com