Questioning Dreams, Life, and Want

“It does not do to dwell on dreams and forget to live.”

-- J.K. Rowling

What is the correct attitude and reaction when I fall or slip in public?

“Okay, okay, I thought I had this down. It is one foot in front of the other, right?” Then, start laughing.

Mirror! Mirror! Clearly, you would instantly recognize yourself if you were to look in a mirror! But how well do you really know the person who is reflected back to you? What is this person's purpose on Earth?

If we do honest introspection, we can learn to know the person we see. Their purpose here on earth, on the other hand, is a matter of opinion. The best we can hope for is that our opinion is right.

Should I keep on dreaming and chasing my dreams even if I know I'll fail because I'm not good at it?

Of course, because failure is the best way we learn. Fail, critique, and move forward with new knowledge.

“I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.”

-- Thomas A. Edison

“There is only one thing that makes a dream impossible to achieve: the fear of failure.”

-- Paulo Coelho

“Success is not final, failure is not fatal: it is the courage to continue that counts.”

-- Winston S. Churchill

What are the chances of getting successful in life?

That depends on how hard you’re willing to work.

How can you always believe in yourself? With all of us, there are moments of hesitation. Am I doing the right thing? Will I ever be successful? When will my business take off?

Be happy at all times, even in the face of adversity. If you don’t believe in yourself, who can you truly believe in? I believe in myself, and I fail constantly. My failure is okay because I learn from it and move forward with new knowledge to help me through life.

Asking if you’re doing the right thing, probably means you are, because you’re concerned about it. Being successful is all about being happy always, and your business will take off or fail when it’s ready and you’ve done everything you can to make it work.

I always believe in myself because I try to adhere to a personal moral code of ethics. Things may go wrong in my life, but I know I’ve done everything ethically possible to make it go right. I simply have to find where I went wrong and fix it. Life really isn’t complicated, we just make it that way. Make the conscious choice to believe you’re okay… because you are. This is believing in yourself.

Why should a lucky person live a good life while an unlucky person lives a bad life?

Define a “bad life”? Is the “unlucky” person happy in their life? Is the “lucky” person? Happiness is a choice each of us must make for our life, even in the face of adversity, bad luck, rejection, and such. We must constantly strive to be happy at all times because the alternative simply sucks.

“Feeling lost, crazy, and desperate belongs to a good life as much as optimism, certainty and reason.”

-- Alain de Botton

“Convince yourself every day that you are worthy of a good life. Let go of stress, breathe. Stay positive, all is well.”

-- Germany Kent

How can I identify my strengths and weaknesses?

Live life. Try all things. Fail and succeed. What you fail at, try to do again with what you’ve learned in failure. Strengths and weaknesses will stand out to those with honest and open minds. Point of order, though, don’t write off your weaknesses. You may find time to work on them, down the road. They might just become a strength.

In your opinion, is it good to always get what we want without needing us to put some effort to have them?

Will you treat what you get with more respect than if you worked for it? Is it better to not treat what you have with respect than to respect it? If a communist country has freedom thrust upon it, the people have not earned the freedoms they have, and this will cause turmoil. To fight for your freedom, to work for it, is to respect what you get. This is true for all things.

How can I cope with the realization that the simple years of life (childhood) are over?

If you choose not to cope with it, are the simple years of childhood still over? Coping or not coping has no bearing on the “simple years” being done. If you find a need to cope, do so by finding a way to make the adult years as simple. Stay out of debt, work hard at something you enjoy, love like there’s no tomorrow, live life to the fullest, and strive to be happy always, even if life isn’t that simple at times. What is done is done, time to get over it, smile at all the memories, and move on down the road making new memories.

"The end of childhood is when things cease to astonish us. When the world seems familiar, when one has got used to existence, one has become an adult."

-- Eugene Ionesco

What can you say to disprove the saying, "don't ever change for anyone"?

Who have you let control your life to the extent you have no freedom of choice and will change just because they say so? Role-playing the “submissive little bitch” is one thing, but actually letting someone really control you is another. Disprove the saying? You are who you are, and no one has the right to make you change just because they want you to.

Having said this, if you’re a total asshole and a woman you’re attracted to called you down on it, you might want to ask yourself if being an asshole is really the way you want to go through life, especially if she’s attractive. Again, this is your choice, not theirs. They simply pointed out the obvious flaw in your character.

Can we say life is unfair to some people?

We can, but it would show a lack of understanding of life and the power we have to choose and decide what happens to us. We also have the right to surrender that power to others so they can make choices and decisions for us, in which case we have chosen to allow them to screw up our lives. About the only thing in life we don’t choose are our parents and, until we come of age, they can destroy our life or protect us and beautify it.

Life isn’t unfair to some people as much as they are unfair to themselves. It would help if we were taught, early on, to ask ourselves “why” things happen to us and then look at what choice or decision we made that drove the incident to happen. As children, we don’t always understand this concept, so adults can take advantage of us.

What's a short-term struggle that one should endure in order to have long-term success?

A good education comes to mind.

“You need to spend time crawling alone through shadows to truly appreciate what it is to stand in the sun.”

-- Shaun Hick

Do you agree with the statement "Having money is not the measure of a man, what matters is how he got it. If he produced it by creating value then it is a token of honor, if he got it by taking from others then he is simply a looter"?

Yes! I find that most politicians are looters, and they lie about it to the people who vote them into office, which makes them liars, as well. “An honest politician is one who when he is bought will stay bought.” -- Simon Cameron

Does God do the impossible?

No more than we can. If you tell someone, who has never seen a plane, that you can fly, they will say it’s “impossible” until you do it, and when you do, you are considered a god. The impossible is only impossible until someone does it. If we feel a “god” can do everything, then there is nothing impossible for them. If there was, how sad is that for a god? 

How do I believe in myself to do stuff?

Start by doing the stuff. Whether you fail or succeed you have made the effort to go forward. There is no better way to believe in yourself than to make an effort. You will fail, that is almost as certainty, but failure is nothing more than an opportunity to learn from your mistakes. Everyone makes mistakes, everyone. If they say they don’t they are lying to you, and a liar believes so little in themselves, for obvious reasons. Believe in yourself, but, most importantly, believe that you will continue forward regardless of what other people say or do.  It is your life, after all.  Live it!

“I have not failed. I've just found 10,000 ways that won't work.”

-- Thomas A. Edison

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as a chaplain at the regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com