Opinions Are Like Sphincters

"Opinions are like assholes. Everyone has one and they all smell the same."

-- Unknown

If you are not good, how can you get what you want?

Whether you’re good or not, you will usually get what you want. Sooner or later, however, you will also get what you deserve.  Better to just make good choices and decisions and learn to  be happy with what comes your way.  

What are 10 words you can use to describe yourself (be kind, no bashing)?

You can’t bash yourself if you’re honest and own it. I am fallible, humorous, ethical, spiritual, happy, analytical, smart, flirtatious, exotic, and hypocritical. One might ask how I can be both ethical and hypocritical; it has to do with being honest, which has to do with ethics.

If I make a choice that will change my destiny, will I be playing God by bringing new people into my life who wouldn’t have if I didn’t make that choice?

No. Life is all about learning to make choices and decisions. These will ultimately guide our path. Those who we invite into our lives also make the choice to come. Their lives will also change by the choices they make. We cannot take responsibility for the happiness or lives of others, only of our own. Nor can anyone blame us for why their lives take a turn because of a choice or decision they make.

“The best years of your life are the ones in which you decide your problems are your own. You do not blame them on your mother, the ecology, or the president. You realize that you control your own destiny.”

-- Albert Ellis (1913-2007), psychologist, REB Therapy

What job did you want to be when you were younger, and what are you now?

I wanted, more than anything, to be Bond, James Bond. I made it into military intelligence and retired after a fulfilling 22+ year career.

How will you become a good model to everyone around you?

A good sense of moral ethics. Never compromise your ethics or nobody will ever really know who you are.

Why haven’t you been successful in life as society defines it?

Because society doesn’t define success in terms of happiness. Success is more than just how far up the ladder you can climb or how much money you can make. You can have all of that and never find happiness. If you aren’t truly happy haw can you say you’ve achieved success? I have been successful in two careers. Now I am being successful as a responsible son. Yes, I have made mistakes and failed; all good lessons to learn from. My greatest success was finding happiness with who, what, and why I am. I give society little credence for defining anything correctly.

“Try not to become a man of success. Rather become a man of value.”

-- Albert Einstein (1879-1955), theoretical physicist 

How did you find the career you really wanted to pursue? What did you do?

I wasn’t really looking… when “fate” intervened. I answered when fate knocked at my door. I was drafted to go to Vietnam, so I enlisted in the Air Force after two years of college psychology. They offered me the “Intelligence” career field after basic training. I asked what it entailed and the answer was, “analysis and screwing with people's heads.” Well, I was going to college to learn that anyway, so I accepted. I did more analysis than anything, but I had a ball for over 20 years… and still screwed with people’s heads.

Which do you value most, your material possessions, or your privilege of controlling your own thoughts and why?

Would you give up controlling your own thoughts for any material possessions? Controlling my own thoughts is a God-given right. To give up this right is a choice only you can make, but why would you? People die to protect their freedom of thought. People will die in the United States to protect their freedom of thought from socialists who would try to control it. Those people call themselves patriots, but they really value something more than a country. They value their freedom.

What are your views and life goals with respect to money?

Money cannot buy happiness. My goal is to remain happy. If money can be worked into this goal, so much the better. But, if money conflicts in any way with my happiness, I choose to be happy always. The money I make in my retirement is sufficient for my humble needs. 

“No, my son, do not aspire for wealth and labor not only to be rich. Strive instead for happiness, to be loved and to love, and most important to acquire peace of mind and serenity.”

-- Og Mandino (1923-1996), author, "The Greatest Salesman in the World"

How does continual failure affect a person?

It depends on how they view failure. Failure is one of the best teachers. We look at what we did, analyze why we failed, and try again. We continue to do this until we succeed and then we file why we succeeded in the lesson learned category. If this continual failure has to do with one task, the lesson isn’t being learned after many repetitions. If it has to do with many different tasks, they’re giving up without trying again, not understand that failure is a lesson to be learned from.

Understanding failure as a lesson might mitigate feelings of low self-esteem if society wouldn't stigmatize it so.  People should want to seek assistance to ensure they understand the lesson, if for no other reason than to ensure it’s not the task that’s the real issue. However, continually not succeeding makes me wonder if there might be a some sort of learning disability in play.  I had a hard time taking written tests, for instance.  I knew the answers, I'd just go blank due to nerves.  I finally got over it in the military with some assistance.

My point being, failure is the best way we learn. It is also a way for us to judge how well we learn, as is testing. But, we must be willing to try again when we fail, in order to understand the issues so we can pass the test.

How do you see yourself in 5-10 years?

A 72 to 77-year-old studmuffin who is happy always! I don’t plan on changing (except for maybe losing a few pounds), unless God steps in to make it happen. 

What's the difference between bringing oneself down and stuping so low?

Bringing oneself down could mean getting off your “high horse” and stop being egotistical, or to lower yourself to someone else's level of education so you can better communicate and understand their concerns. Stuping so low is all about throwing your moral ethics out the window and risking the loss of respect others might have for you.

There is a story of a spiritual seeker who one day came to his master and asked, "In the olden days it is said that there were people who walked and talked with God. Why doesn't this happen anymore?" The master replied, "Because nowadays no one will stoop so low.

-- Robert A. Johnson (1921-2018), Jungian analyst, author

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteers as lead Chaplain and Chaplain Program Liaison, at the regional medical center.