How "Content" Are You?

I went out to the readers, once again, for ideas to post here on the Congregation blog.  You know, I should be careful what I ask for, especially from friends I rely on, and who usually give me more than I want.  This particular friend has always been a good muse for me, and she, once again, did not disappoint.  Her email begins as a political tirade and does an immediate segue to spirituality, God, and contentment (or, lack thereof).  As always, thank you, Doll!

"Actually, my pet peeve lately has been this amnesty and the brilliant idea to give illegal immigrants who have worked illegally three years of retroactive earned income tax credits once they get "amnesty." That's MY #*$!?@% MONEY! But more stressful than that is the idea that we are no longer United States of anything. Jay and I started counting yesterday, how many times we are referred to simply as "America." That's because we have lost our nationality. We are just America - the place where anyone can go and do anything. I feel like a foreigner in my own country. Hell, in my own state! But that's political and not spiritual. When it comes to spirituality, I'm still kind of numb. We listened to Joel Osteen yesterday talk about being content, Paul "learned" to be content. Even while waiting for God's answers to my prayers, I need to be content.

Lately, I've not been content. My apartment appliances were infested with german roaches....NOT CONTENT at all!!! Not being able to cook or use any dishes in my kitchen for 3 weeks will [mess] a woman up. Especially one who is used to cooking multiple times a week. But you know what Tony? Since I sold my house last year, nothing is the same. I cried last weekend because I felt such overwhelming regret at having sold. I felt so helpless. I couldn't afford the place by myself, yet was tired of roommates who were never really good roommates. I guess I could have rented it and dealt with being a slum lord, but decided that wasn't a good move either, in case I got bad tenants and then I wouldn't be able to afford two places. So I sold my home, my yard, my washer, dryer, driveway to wash my car, back patio to sit on and watch the sun set, and all that room that I used to entertain friends. This "change of life" shit is exactly that....shit. I'm not sure any of it matters anymore. I'm not in charge, apparently. So....I'm trying really hard to be content with what I have. And right now, that's a great job and a roof over my head and the sweetest cat anyone could ask for! Now...before you go on your tangent, I'm not upset, angry, or sad.....just being open and honest with a friend about reality. I'm good!

I'm going this weekend to get me a new pair of walking shoes so hopefully when it decides to stop raining, I can start walking again...it will be 3 months yet before I can get in the pool to swim and boy am I out of shape!!! Christmas holidays and then birthday month added about 7 pounds.....rabbit food is boring! LOL

Knowing you, I'm sure you can find a topic in here somewhere..."

My freaking goodness!  Have you asked yourself how your life is going lately?  After having read the email above... any complaints?  Let's try to be cold and analytical, and break this email down a bit.

As far as what's happening with immigration, why worry over something which we have no control.  Vote, call your representative, voice your dissatisfaction with Congress, and go eat a salad.  

America is America.  It could be Central, South, or North, but it certainly isn't united on anything, yet.  But, the states are starting to balk at all the control thats getting out of, well... control.  Again, nothing to do for it that worrying about will help.  Hell, I spent over 22 years protecting our rights to wallow in this shit.  Lucky us!  Eat more salad.

Her spirituality is numb, yet she watches Joel Osteen and understands she must be content even while waiting for God's answers to her prayers, one of which seems to be answered, by the way, since "Jay" and her were watching Joel.  No, she still has her faith, and God, and I think its obvious she knows it.

I have followed my friends story since before she sold the house.  As much as she decries it, her reasons for selling were sound, and she goes on in the email to confirm this for herself.  She cries because of overwhelming regret and helplessness, yet fully understands why she made the decision to sell.

Cockroaches are never a good thing, especially when they aren't from anything you haven't done.  It looks as if, per an update, the apartment management is sending in a cleanup crew.  Ya think?  Took them how long?  I would have been on the ceiling over this, tolerance be damned.    

I have to admit that sometimes a total change of life, job, house, and love, can really feel like shit.  Does it matter?  Sure, to a point, the point where you lose sight of happiness, where you lose control, where you're no longer in charge.  At what point did this happen?  Well, how long are you going to wait for God to answer your prayers?  

And then she even answers herself on this point.

She is still, after all that has happened, and is happening, she is still trying hard to be content with what she has; a great job, a roof over her head, and the sweetest cat (I guess Jay needs to try harder to make the list.  Sucks being the new guy.).

The bright side of this, if we want to find one, is she's added seven pounds, can't use the pool, and it is raining so she can't walk.  Not being able to cook fits right in to her need for diet.  God's plan?  I wonder, but put some fattening dressing on the salad, for taste, and add a few croutons for crunch. 

I always love it when people, especially my friends that know me all too well, try to head me off with, "Before you say I'm being this, or that, let me deny it, and then anchor it by touting our friendship."  It is especially interesting when they launch into my "tangent" for me, so I really don't have much to say but to agree with their assessment which they might not understand they just made for me.  I will smile much into the night, tonight, as much as she will probably be cussing me out for this comment.

Sometimes life overwhelms us.  Sometimes we deny it and would rather not listen to someone blow the "reality smoke" up our ass by telling us what we already know - we will get through it, we always do, it just takes time.  We can't lose faith, or wait on God.  I mean, really?  God will not blink.  All good things come, by and by.  

But, this is all just, well, being honest with a friend about reality.  Isn't it?


Editor's Note:  

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion.  It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other.  An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so.

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and then engaging in peaceful, constructive, discussion and debate in an arena of mutual respect concerning the opinions put forth.  After over twenty years as a military intelligence analyst, planner, and briefer, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human.  God's test for us is what we do afterward, and what we learn from the experience.
  

Pastor Frank Anthony Villari

Pastor Tony is founder of the Congregation for Religious Tolerance and author/editor of the Congregation's official blog site, "The Path."