Questioning Losers, Help, Respect, Life, and Fear

 

“Perfection' is man's ultimate illusion. It simply doesn't exist in the universe... If you are a perfectionist, you are guaranteed to be a loser in whatever you do.”

-- David D. Burns

What makes someone a loser with no friends?

A poor self-image. No one is truly a loser unless they convince themselves they are, or they believe the “losers” around them that stroke their own lack of ego by knocking someone down a peg or two. It is better to ignore the ignorance that surrounds us and move forward rapidly passed it. Friends will show up if you put your real self out there.

Do people ask questions they know are ridiculous but still ask anyway?

It’s only ridiculous if you ask it more than once or argue about the answer. 

Why do I like to see people lose so much? Does that make me a loser?

In a way. If people lose, that must mean you have not. It seems selfish. When I watch sports, I cheer for the team I like to see win. But I also give kudos to the other team for making a great play. If my team loses, they should have "shown up" for the game.  If this happens, I credit the other team for showing up to play. 

Does everyone realize the fewer stupid people, the fewer the ads?

The ads will still be pervasive. They’ll be more intelligent since the audience isn’t as stupid as they once were. Hah! Good luck with that…

Did you know I can prove that I have more value and that I am much less of a loser than you are? Do you wish to testify?

I have no desire to stroke egos. I have the value I have worked to have. You might have more value, but it is not for me to judge, because I really don’t care. I do care that I have value. If you can prove that you have more, then, bravo. I believe you, but why do you think this is so important for you to prove? Everyone has value until someone tries to diminish it. It is what it is until it isn’t.

Why do we ask ourselves so many questions when the alligators never bothered and we'll still be there long after we're gone?

How will we still be there long after we’re gone?

“The problem is not the misunderstanding we have, but the understanding we have missed. We must come to a certain understanding; to understand understanding, we need to understand understanding and we must understand with understanding!”

-- Ernest Agyemang Yeboah

How do you break people’s hopelessness, apathy, division, and ignorance to lead them to unity, a sense of fellowship, mutual understanding, common sense, and discipline?

They ask for your help. Or, you can beat your head against a wall. The choice is yours, but it is so much easier when the person is on board and isn’t being forced to come along. 

Is it my fault? I'm confused for a long time now. How should I be feeling?

If it’s your fault, you’ll know it. If you have to ask the question, maybe not so much. If you’ve done your best, and things still turn to shit, it may be your fault, but you have nothing to be ashamed about, if you tried your best. Life is about learning, especially when the chips are down. If people want to blame you, they need to walk a mile in your shoes. Where were they when the shit hit the fan?

Can't even a few black people succeed because of the majority of idiot blacks?

When we see that a few white people succeed when there are a multitude of idiot whites, I’d say the field is pretty even.

How much respect do you have towards someone when they are able to take accountability for their actions and admit that they are wrong, especially if they tried to deny their wrongdoings at first?

Not knowing they are wrong can excuse their denial, at first. The fact that they are secure enough to take accountability and admit they were wrong, says they can admit their mistakes. I respect their ability to see the bigger picture. The next time they are in the same situation, they will probably think about this lesson and do better. I’d rather send a person who has been through hell and come out the other side with better knowledge than send someone with no clue.

If you think someone is being judgemental/prejudiced; they're ignorant, insecure & need to put others down to feel okay about themselves, or they view the world from a perspective of non-judgment that transcends your ignorance. Agree or disagree?

The fact they are judgmental is enough evidence for one to judge them as ignorant… if one were to judge, which is never a good idea.

Who agrees that one of the goals of life is to have the respect of everybody around you and that should be everybody's mindset because if everyone respects you that means you're a high-value person and if they don't it means your low value?

How egotistical is this? The goal of life can be manyfold. Strive for mutual respect. You should strive to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances, and you should strive to be selfless. If you can do all of this, you will have some value to society, if not to yourself.

“Learn to light a candle in the darkest moments of someone’s life. Be the light that helps others see; it is what gives life its deepest significance.”

-- Roy T. Bennett

What are some reasons why we should treat our minds with respect?

If you don’t respect your mind, your mind will not respect you. You get what you give, and your mind is the basis of all reality for you. If you respect your mind and your mind disrespects you, you have issues.

What happens to a question that has achieved popularity on [this site]?

It is, most probably, answered. 

If I give a downvote to a comment or postulate that I disagree with and that seems ill-founded, am I falling into an echo chamber?

No, you’re falling into a life of constantly making ill-founded comments. Instead of “downvoting” a person’s comment, you might ask intelligent questions. Or, make your cogent comments to understand the other person’s perspective. Otherwise, you might risk becoming another member of the League of the Perpetually Offended.

What does it mean when a guy says he's loyal, honest, and trustworthy?

He’s a legend in his own mind. Proving it is another thing.

Is respect something that is earned or something everyone deserves?

Respect is something everyone deserves until they don’t. Respect is a two-way street. You should expect to get the respect you give. If you don’t, the person is probably too self-involved to consider respecting you. I called a medical doctor down on this when he was deciding whether to take me as a patient. He introduced himself as Doctor, and I responded with my title of Master Sergeant. He decided to sign me on, but I told him I wasn’t sure I wanted him as my doctor. I wanted some more information on him.  We talked some more, and I told him he was acceptable. It never occurred to him that he might not be what I was looking for. We both laughed, but this is how respect can be twisted.

Why do people think they need to be perfect at something before showing it to others?

They don’t understand that they can never be perfect. Perfect means there is nothing that can ever be better. They can be “excellent” at something, but never perfect.

“When you stop expecting people to be perfect, you can like them for who they are.”

-- Donald Miller

Is what you do in life good or bad?

I always strive to do good in life. Occasionally, I don’t think things through, and I fail, but I always try to make it right. Selfishness breeds bad things in life. I always try to be selfless in everything I do.

What kind of god answers our prayers?

A “god” that has enough time to go around answering everybody’s prayers. It makes more sense that we answer our prayers. The strength we draw from our faith has much to do with attaining our goals. We have been “gifted” everything we need to get through this life and into the next, and the next, and so on. Instead of praying for miracles, it would be better if we draw from the strength we have been gifted and create the miracles we seek.

What is another way of saying "I love people"?

That’s pretty much it. Short, sweet, and meaningful. I’m not sure you can improve on it.

Is it true that no one can answer the question "What is God?"?

Since no one has met “God” it seems reasonable that no one can answer this. The mere fact that we must have “faith” is evidence that we believe in something for which there is little or no proof. Every deist has their own belief of “what” God is, yet no one knows for certain.

How do I make real cash?

Make sure the cash you make has some value to purchase things you need. If it doesn’t, then you have worked for bogus currency.

What is something you need to say that will clear your conscience?

Anything you say will be so much bullshit. If you want to try to clear your conscience, make right what you did wrong. Your conscience will still slap you around, but you’ll know you did the right thing to correct the mistake.

“A clear conscience is the sure sign of a bad memory.”

-- Mark Twain

What would happen if someone had zero fear capacity?

They would experience a short life span.

Reader comment: They would have to be in a padded cell.

My reply: Indeed. 

How does prayer work? Does it guarantee that our wishes will come true?

No, but it does evidence a belief in a supreme power in the universe. What you “wish” is up to you to work toward. What you end up with is your fate, which is totally in your own hands.

What’s the difference between “Zero capacity to feel fear” and “No Emotion Of Fear”?

It seems to be the same thing.  

Have you ever thought "No one could be this stupid"?

Yes, every time I run into a member of the League of the Perpetually Offended. No one could be that stupid. Then I berate myself for judging them, though they put themselves out there to be judged. If you aren’t cognizant, stupidity can infect you without you realizing it.

What if all humans suddenly become completely emotionless?

Zero population growth.

How do I think better than success in life?

“Success in life” is to experience true happiness always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances. There is nothing better than this success. Regardless of reaching goals or failing, you will always be able to smile at the lesson and try, try, again.

“He has achieved success who has lived well, laughed often, and loved much;

Who has enjoyed the trust of pure women, the respect of intelligent men, and the love of little children;

Who has filled his niche and accomplished his task;

Who has never lacked appreciation of Earth's beauty or failed to express it;

Who has left the world better than he found it,

Whether an improved poppy, a perfect poem, or a rescued soul;

Who has always looked for the best in others and given them the best he had;

Whose life was an inspiration;

Whose memory a benediction.”

-- Bessie Anderson Stanley

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions, and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance... he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com