More Answers to Questions

“You spend your whole life looking for answers because you think the next answer will solve all your problems: make you a little less miserable, because when you run out of questions you don't just run out of answers... you run out hope.”

-- Pilot Episode - "House M.D." (2004)

Why does everything change?

“The only constant in life is change” -- Heraclitus (c. 500 BCE).  Actually, change is the only universal constant. There seems to be no such thing as an absolute unless we consider change, as change absolutely happens.  Even a “total vacuum” isn’t totally void of particles, evidencing that change even affects a vacuum. Everything goes through changes, grows, breaks down, or dies. Radioactive isotopes decay. Suns explode, and the universe continues to expand until it doesn’t. Everything is what it is until it isn’t, and then it is what it is, once again.  It may look the same, but it really isn't.  Change is occurring at every moment.

When things are really bad and you are miserable and you have an opportunity to do something that will make things worse for everyone else but it will give you a glimpse of happiness and fulfillment, do you go for it?

Unless everyone else’s happiness is predicated on your misery, why would you even consider this? If their happiness is predicated on your misery, stop being miserable. That’ll teach them. We make a choice to allow misery to invade our lives. If people are using you and this makes you miserable, then make the choice to get rid of that little piece of drama from your life. Divorce yourself from associating with selfish people who use you for their own happiness. Happiness is a choice each of us must make for ourselves, and our happiness should not rely on others. Just choose to be happy, and then go about making it so.

“There are some questions that shouldn't be asked until a person is mature enough to appreciate the answers.”

-- Anne Bishop, author

Is there such a thing as multiple opportunities or people that could be “the one” throughout your life like can multiple people you’ll meet in life have the sure-fire ability to be that special person you’ll last throughout life with just curious?

At 66 years of age, I’m talking to several of them about missed opportunities, how things might have changed lives, made things better. I still love them all, even the one I divorced and learned to forgive. Life is a crapshoot. You take your best shot at happiness. Sometimes you win, sometimes you lose, and sometimes you leave knowing you still have money in your pocket and another shot at life. Who you’re with is not as important as that you loved at all, multiple times, as long as you really felt for them. Better we try and fail, and live to try again, being happy always.

I seem to come across so many negativity these days, and its really taking its toll, so what has been the most positive thing that has happened to you today and how do you stay positive within such a negative environment?

First of all, positivity is all about happiness. Happiness is all about making the right choices in this life. Ignore the negativity, unless you can make some impact to mitigate it. Don’t concern yourself over things that you have little or no control. Find an environment that isn’t negative. I have a cigar bar that I frequent, where we can talk about any topic and still have a beer afterward and part friends. If you don’t have this, you need to get rid of who you’re with. Happiness is a choice we make, and it requires us to structure our lives to accept it. At first, you may find yourself alone, until you learn to be happy always. Being happy always will piss off many of the League of the Perpetually Offended. Well, boo hoo! Sucks being them.

“I bet you could sometimes find all the mysteries of the universe in someone's hand.”

-- Benjamin Alire Sáenz, poet, author

 How easy is it to just do the right thing?

Sometimes it isn’t that easy, but it is the right thing. It always seems easier to take the easy road, but then you have to deal with yourself. You will always know you didn’t do what you should have. This can be a terrible weight to bear. Now, don’t do the right thing always and see how the weight multiplies. Better to just do the right thing always, regardless of what it takes. In this way, you can strive to be happy always.

In what situations is it not worth hesitating?

Life and death. Hesitation when it concerns fight or flight might be worth consideration, but life and death could be more costly. 

How many times did you choose the wrong way? Can you explain what did you do to turn back to the right way?

Many times. Not that I was a dull tool, I just had issues with taking sound advice from credible sources. I had a hard time recognizing that being intelligent was not the same thing as being smart. I was, however, smart enough to admit my mistakes, learn from them, and go back to the fork in the road to correct it. I learned that failure is not something to hide from, or not to admit. Failure is the best way to learn, and I learned plenty over the past 66 years. Making mistakes is about making the right choices, and making choices is about being human. Even intelligent people make mistakes. Admitting mistakes makes you honest and ethical... smart. Correcting your mistakes evidences how smart you are, but mentoring others concerning your mistakes is an intelligent path to fulfillment and happiness.

“To ask the 'right' question is far more important than to receive the answer. The solution of a problem lies in the understanding of the problem; the answer is not outside the problem, it is in the problem.”

-- Jiddu Krishnamurti (1895-1996), philosopher, speaker, writer

How can you be exemplary as a leader without imposing yourself as a model?

I think Donald Trump is a good example of this. I love what he has done to make this country great again. As a leader, I think he has done well, but as a role model, he sucks. His mouth gets him into much trouble, as do his non-stop tweets. He does speak what’s on the mind of most American’s, but sometimes not everything needs to be thrown out there with such blatant honesty. Not everyone is mature enough to handle this tact, especially not the League of the Perpetually Offended.

Who are some historians that you feel don't get enough credit?

Any honest “historian” who wants to teach real history, won't get the credit they deserve, much less get tenure. Most historians teach a tainted “version” of history. This has been going on for some time. Institutions of learning don’t really want honest history taught so they allow "instructors" to teach an editorialized version of it. Now, it seems, there is also a move to remove math and cursive writing from the curriculum. The reason for this is pretty clear for those who have ears to hear: Of what use is any of this to a communist ideology? Good question, especially when you understand, from history, that any hidden agenda of communist indoctrination is a dangerous road to follow.

“People who fit don’t seek. The seekers are those that don’t fit.”

-- Shannon L. Alder, author

How did people in the past live, compared to people living in the present?

The vast majority worked hard to get by. There was no “welfare” allowing them to sit on their hind parts and take advantage of everyone else’s hard work. Back then, you worked hard or you probably died. This is a great motivator. The majority of migrant farm labor wasn’t done by Mexicans, and men traveled across the country to help build dams and other infrastructure projects for the little money they could send back home. Of course, back then, there were no laws prohibiting unskilled labor, either. Have you seen anyone with a bucket or broom going door to door asking if they can wash windows, sweep a store, or weed a garden? That’s because if they hurt themselves they will own you when the lawyers are done. This makes it very hard for anyone really wanting to work in order to better their lot and build the country up, instead of leeching off of society.

When did you decide you don’t have to prove anything to the world?

When I became a Master Sergeant and officers from other bases were calling to ask my interpretation of regulations. I came to the realization early on, that what other people think is just a critique of the good job you think you’re doing. If the critique is negative you have to consider their reasons and determine if you have to tweak your processes. If it is positive you have to ask yourself if you agree with their conclusion and, if not, why not. Never think you know everything; once you do, you've fallen into a trap.  But, the only person you have to prove yourself to is you, so be honest with yourself. Everyone else?  Well, they're just part of your “quality control” section.

“The only thing I know is that I know nothing, and I am not quite sure that I know that.”

-- Socrates (c. 470-399 BC), philosopher

What communication skills are needed in planning?

Be clear and concise about everything. Let people around you ask questions for clarification and, remember, there are no stupid questions, not if you’ve chosen the right team. Be open-minded to concerns and be opened to change. When you think the planning is complete, it isn’t. Go over it again. Have your team go over it again. If the plan is for another group, have them go over it again. Then, expect the plan to go south and have an alternate “Plan B” ready. Always hope for the best and plan for the worst.

One of my friends thinks that being an adult is about doing what you want, when you want, at all times, but isn't more about realizing that you have liberty, but still have to be responsible and you still have to do things like chores?

Absolutely true! It is about so much more. What we see happening in America today, with riots and cities burning, police being defunded, history being torn down, is basically an anarchist takeover of our freedom. This is what your friend is destined for.

Being an adult is about being mature. Being able to discuss constructive solutions to important issues, and determine if the issues are really important enough to discuss. These riots were about the death of a black man by a bad cop. We all saw it. We all agreed he murdered the man. Burning cities proved what, other than your friend got to do whatever he wanted? No. You have to be responsible. You have to look at where we were and how far we’ve come. We aren’t perfect, and maybe never will be, but we are trying. It is a lot easier to try as mature adults than as murdering anarchists that divide a country and accomplish nothing… but setting us back 20 years

“Lots of things are mysteries. But that doesn't mean there isn't an answer to them. It's just that scientists haven't found the answer yet.”

-- Mark Haddon, author

Does time have depth? If so, how can it be represented or explained?

I’ll give you my thought and let the physicists rip it apart. Time is a human construct developed to give structure to this existence. Time, for all the stress it gives us, does not really exist. What is in the past is done, memories of the lessons we have learned. The future does not exist until it does, and then it is the present. Each moment is a gift for each of us. A new moment in which to excel in this reality we call life. I try not to stress over this thing we call time, even though, like most of us, I was programmed to live by it. Better to just be happy always. 

“Google can bring you back 100,000 answers. A librarian can bring you back the right one.”

-- Neil Gaiman, author

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteers as lead Chaplain and Chaplain Program Liaison, at the regional medical center.