Questions of Cleverness, Faith, Ethics, and Happiness

 

“A stupid man's report of what a clever man says can never be accurate because he unconsciously translates what he hears into something he can understand.”

-- Bertrand Russell

How do people learn from mistakes and failures, and are not afraid to fail again?

Failure is nothing more than another chance to learn. Critique why you went wrong, and try again until you get it right, then move on. If you don’t learn from failure you risk failing the same way, again.

Does free will affect my faith or not?

Forced faith is not faith. Forced faith is not a belief in something for which there is little or no proof. Faith is your freedom to believe, driven by what you freely feel.

Why do some people think of themselves as more clever than others? Where does this silly self-confidence come from?

That “silly self-confidence” comes from validating that they’re more clever than others. Touting your cleverness, however, is a bit egotistical, begging for someone to come along and shut you up. But, being clever is really not a bad thing. You can be intelligent, you can be smart, and you can be both. I would rate “clever” in there with being smart.

“People who boast about their I.Q. are losers.”

-- Stephen Hawking

If life is aimless (and I’m sure you’ve already figured this out), then what is right and wrong?

So, you’ve figured out, for yourself, that life is aimless. It is fortunate that most of us don’t buy into this belief. My life is anything but aimless. I have a path, as do most people, and I’m following it through life, enjoying the journey and the opportunity to learn and experience all that life has to offer.

As far as right and wrong is concerned, I have faith that has helped me form a personal moral code of ethics that guides me through right and wrong.

What kind of rule do you live by?

Flexible ones. But, generally, I strive to be happy always, and if I can’t be happy, I try to be kind. These are rules for my personal code of ethics.

What things should I know how to do at the age of 20?

Chores. Cook, clean, wash dishes and clothes, if iron, sew, polish your shoes, dress appropriately, treat people with respect, yadda, yadda, yadda. Momma ain’t doing for you no more. Time to step up and impress.

“The only true wisdom is in knowing you know nothing.”

-- Socrates

Why do people relate to poor health, lack of education, too old, too young, bad luck, and so on as excuses for failure instead of accepting their mistake?

Ego prohibits most of us from being honest. Everything you listed has to do with the choices and decisions we make for our own lives, whether too old or too young.

To try and shift blame to others is so transparent as to be laughable. Our life is our life, and no one controls it but us. If we let someone else make decisions for us, this, too, is our decision, our choice, to let them run our lives. How stupid can we be?

Any failure is simply another opportunity for us to learn why we went wrong and to correct it, if possible, or mitigate it ever happening again. Our failure is something we should own and embrace. No one is perfect, and we all make mistakes.

We were never meant to assume the burden of attempting to save others from personal despair by meddling. Do you agree?

You can’t save others from themselves. They have to want to be saved, either by themselves or by others. Meddling can just make things worse if they don’t accept it. Better to ask if they’d like some advice than to just meddle.

If you win a professional championship but lose after, does that mean you are a winner or not a winner of the profession?

The loss can be for any number of reasons. What is more important is how many championships they’ve won. Winning just one time could be a fluke. It shows that your winning is not sustainable, and this is problematic for a champion. But, if you win consistently, it is evidence that “champion” status is well-deserved.

“To be a champion, compete; to be a great champion, compete with the best; but to be the greatest champion, compete with yourself.”

-- Matshona Dhliwayo

In sports, does talent actually exist?

How many footballs can a quarterback put through a small hole at distance? How many baskets can a basketball player sink at distance? How many points below par does a professional golfer constantly hit? If you don’t have talent, the answer is not many. If they don’t have talent, they don’t have a spot on the team, they don’t get invited to play, and they don’t earn the big money.

Do you believe I can still find a good person as my best friend?

Are you a good person? Like tends to attract like. Opposites also attract, but they can be volatile, like vinegar and oil. They taste good together, but they just don’t mix. There are many good people out there, so if you’re having trouble finding one for a “best friend” perhaps you need to hand around a better group of people.

How do we leverage who we are and not let others affect us to a point where it hinders our momentum forward in life?

First of all, it is your life, not theirs. If someone thinks they have the power to hinder your momentum, better you should lose them. Only you control your momentum, so if you let others control it, that is your choice and not a very good one.

Leverage who you are by being who you are, by controlling who you are, and not by letting others control your life. Only you can walk your path.  It is a concept that revolves around you controlling yourself.

“Accept the fact that you will grow apart from people you’ve had significant relationships with. Understand when someone no longer positively affects your life. Let them go. Don’t hinder your growth.”

-- Unknown

What is something you have done that caused many to assume that you were of a much higher social class than you are?

Nothing. Being humble pretty much prohibits that from happening. However, my parents built a house that wrapped around a hillside in Monterey, California, and many of my friends thought I was spoiled. The wrong assumption, since I worked hard for every penny I had. My parents made certain I was brought up to know the value of many and to respect the hard work it took to earn it.

Does no one who is unwilling to make personal sacrifices achieve success?

Not unless their “success” is really someone else’s hard work, like family. But, then, “old money” is only sustainable if the inheritor works just as hard to keep it.

What is a skill you think should be compulsory to learn?

True happiness. Being truly happy is not only a choice but also a skill all of us should learn from the minute we’re born. I didn’t become skillful at striving to be happy always and in all things until after my divorce from a bad 25-year marriage. Had I known how to be truly happy prior to my marriage, I would have paid more attention to the mistake I was making and would have chosen better.

Reader comment:  Who teaches ‘true happiness’?

My reply:  No one… and that’s the big problem.

“True happiness is permanent. It doesn't vanish if the cause is gone”

-- Cindrella

 

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as a chaplain at the regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com