Questioning Life and Choices

"The important thing is not to stop questioning.  Curiosity has it's own reason for existing.  One cannot help but be in awe when he contemplates the mysteries of eternity, of life, of the marvelous structure of reality.  It is enough if one tries merely to comprehend a little of this mystery every day.  Never lose a holy curiosity."

-- Albert Einstein

Do you think it’s possible to plan your life, or is it really just a crapshoot?

A “crapshoot” is literally just throwing the dice; a true gamble. In life, however, we have choices to make, and depending on how good our choices are, life can be tempted to lean in a good direction as well. Good choices are usually followed by good circumstances, and bad choices, well, simply suck. Life is only a crapshoot if you sit back and just let life happen. You can hope groceries show up on your doorstep for free, or you can earn some money and go buy them. Life really doesn’t just happen, you make it happen.

What is one piece of advice you would give a teenager to make their life much easier?

Stay out of debt! I keep saying it, but does anyone really hear?

How do you determine the value of something and how much something is really worth?

Regardless of the price someone puts on something, the “value of something” is determined by what you’re willing to pay for it. What you’re willing to pay for it is the determination of “how much something is really worth” to you.

“You think because he doesn't love you that you are worthless. You think that because he doesn't want you anymore that he is right -- that his judgment and opinion of you are correct. If he throws you out, then you are garbage. You think he belongs to you because you want to belong to him. Don't. It's a bad word, 'belong.' Especially when you put it with somebody you love. Love shouldn't be like that. Did you ever see the way the clouds love a mountain? They circle all around it; sometimes you can't even see the mountain for the clouds. But you know what? You go up top and what do you see? His head. The clouds never cover the head. His head pokes through because the clouds let him; they don't wrap him up. They let him keep his head up high, free, with nothing to hide him or bind him. You can't own a human being. You can't lose what you don't own. Suppose you did own him. Could you really love somebody who was absolutely nobody without you? You really want somebody like that? Somebody who falls apart when you walk out the door? You don't, do you? And neither does he. You're turning over your whole life to him. Your whole life, girl. And if it means so little to you that you can just give it away, hand it to him, then why should it mean any more to him? He can't value you more than you value yourself.”

-- Toni Morrison

Are secrets boring? Don't they kill a conversation?

A secret can’t be boring if you don’t know there’s a secret. It is “secret” after all. If someone says they have a secret, remind them that, unless they plan on blabbing it, they would be well served just to drop the subject before it becomes boring and kills the conversation. People that say they have a secret are just too damned much drama for me. Maybe it’s because I spent almost 23 years in military intelligence. After that, what some people call a secret is more of a joke.

[Query Site] is a piece of garbage and there is nothing you can do about it. How does that make you feel?

Makes me feel like there might be more than one person out there with a need to vent about the liberal socialists who run this site. Your "feed" is being followed by two other people, and neither one of them has deigned to answer you, which is more concerning, in my view.  If this site is a "piece of garbage," before you fall in with the League of the Perpetually Offended, might I recommend you put you emotion into starting another site that is more inline with your critical view?  

How do I survive my need to win?

Learn to lose gracefully. Understand that losing is the best way we learn. If you never lose you will never discover your shortcomings, like the need to win. I need to be with a drop-dead gorgeous woman, but that ain’t gonna happen, and I will survive my need by embracing the knowledge of the shortcomings that prevent me from fulfilling my selfish need.

Sometimes, constantly trying and never giving up can be seen by many as a win. What makes a winner? Falling down and getting back up. Perseverance in the face of defeat makes a winner. Knowing you’ve lost, but finishing the race makes a winner. Maybe understanding what truly makes a winner helps. Once you do, you’ll realize you’ve been surviving as a winner even when you’ve lost. Don’t try to survive your need to win, work on surviving your need to compete. If you don’t have that you’ve lost already.

“There is nothing in this life that can destroy you but yourself. Bad things happen to everyone, but when they do, you can't just fall apart and die. You have to fight back. If you don't, you're the one who loses in the end. But if you do keep going and fight back, you win.”

-- Alexandra Monir

Why do my friends never invite me when they go out? I used to have many friends and I was never invited to anything so I always invited myself, and I was the one who always asked people if they wanted to go out, now they always go out without me.

First of all, you call these people your “friends” which they don’t act like, in my view. They aren’t your “friends” would be my humble guess. What they’re doing speaks volumes about who they are. I’d be going out finding the kind of people I want to be a part of, and, more importantly, want to be a part of my life, as well. You know, friends. I sure wouldn’t be wasting life on these other folks.

Are good values more important than good rules?

Yes, but, if they are truly “good” rules they should reflect “good” moral values. If they don’t do this, they really cannot be defined as “good” rules.

How does demeaning and belittling those who disagree with you advance ANY conversation?

It doesn’t, and those that demean and belittle have no intention of advancing ANY conversation. I’m labeled “deplorable” simply because I disagree with forwarding a socialist agenda in my own country. I’ve been labeled a racist by racists and a fascist by fascists, and I’m yelled at because I believe all lives matter. I am none of what they accuse me of being. But, the fact that I’m not what they call me does not forward their agenda, plain and simple. They must be right, or everyone will see them as wrong. There is no middle ground, no compromise, or they lose their goal of the destabilization of a nation. No, there can be no advancement of conversation if it means they lose ground to the “deplorable” who have no right to win, in their eyes.

“People will oppose your progress. They will remind you of your past failures, belittle you, etc. The only way to stand against such opposition and belittling is to know the reason for your existence.”

-- D.S. Mashego

Have you ever thought about compromising your principles for money?

Yes, and then I laughed and spanked myself for the selfish thought. Never, ever, compromise your principles and, especially, not for money. That is the worst reason to prostitute one’s moral values. Your principles and values define who you are. If you compromise them you truly define what kind of loser you choose to be. Thinking about these things is one way we can keep ourselves from falling prey to them, because when the money runs out, and you no longer have a sense of ethics, who have you become?

When was the last time you did something wrong?

A week ago at the Gulfport airport. I stared way too long at a mature woman getting on the plane to Houston with me. She was attractive, blonde, had great legs, wore a short skirt and 4-inch heels. Someone was screwing with me, though, because her twin was on the return flight. I’m not sure if I was ashamed more than I was aroused.

What became a lot easier once you started doing that thing on a regular basis?

Everything we think of as hard becomes “old hat” when we start doing it day-to-day. What took you all day will only take you half a day, in short order. What was once thought to be hard becomes easier with repetition.

“How strange! Life gets easier when we get better.”

-- Debasish Mridha

What does it mean for someone else to have power over you?

It means you made a bad choice by allowing it to happen. Everything is a choice, and the worst is when you allow someone else to control you, your life, your decisions and choices, and anything else they have no business dictating to you. They are doing what you are allowing them to do. If you enjoy this lifestyle, you’re probably a masochist or enjoy being submissive. If this lifestyle bothers you, make a better choice, and strive to be happy always.

What is your basic philosophy in life? Are you an idealist, realist? Or pragmatist?

I’m probably a “realistic pragmatist” in my philosophy. “It is what it is until it isn’t, and then it is what it is again.” Life is about making choices and, if you make a bad choice, you have the choice to back up and make a better one.

Is the ship sinking? Yes! Can we save it? No. Better to spend time saving the passengers. This is a realistic and practical decision when you consider time is of the essence when lives are at stake. This is the way I tend to approach life. It is the way I strive to be happy always.

Is being a criminal the right thing to do? Since unfairness is everywhere?

If you have a moral sense of ethics, hell no. If something is unfair, spend effort making it fair, not gaming the system. The choices you make define who you are. As a deist, the choices you make might determine how you live your next life. Having said all this, life is all about learning lessons, and the best way to learn is to fail. We have criminals incarcerated because they fail. The evidence languishes in our prisons.

A small informational note: Most people and courts in the South try hard to be fair, and we also own several weapons for personal and property protection. We are not “defunding” our police, we are packing the force with trained officers from the North. So, if you want to be a criminal, head-on. The “fairness” of your decision will be explained to you by a jury of your peers, once we get the other courts recognizing the “rule of law” again. Until then, ply your chosen trade up north or out west… and enjoy!

“You can make laws against weapons but they will be observed only by those who don't intend to use them anyway. The lawless can always smuggle or steal or even make a gun. By refusing to wear a gun you allow the criminal to operate with impunity.”

-- Louis L'Amour

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as a chaplain at the regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com