Questioning Our Path

“What if you were wrong? What if everything you ever believed was a lie? What if you missed your opportunity because you didn't know your worth? What if you settled on familiar, but God was trying to give you something better? What if you decided not to go backward, but forward? What if doing what you have never done before was the answer to everything that didn't make sense? What if the answer wasn't to be found in words, but in action? What if you found the courage to do what you really wanted to do and doing it changed your whole life?”

-- Shannon L. Alder, author, writer

How can one forge a new path different from the past?

Take the first step. The past is what went before. We learn from it and move forward. Whether we acknowledge it, or not, our path is constantly changing with our attitudes and what we learn as we move along it. We can look to the future, but the future is not set and may not even occur. The best we can hope for and control is the present, the “now” we live in.

Be what you want, we just live once, and we know what is best for ourselves. Do you believe this?

Well, for the most part. We live more than once, however, and what we learn and do in this life and the next will follow us into the lives which follow, although we may not become aware of it until we truly become aware. Live like there is no tomorrow, and strive to be happy always.

How could you tell if life is for you?

Anne Frank wrote in her diary, “I've reached the point where I hardly care whether I live or die. The world will keep on turning without me, I can't do anything to change events anyway.” But, unbeknownst to her, she did make an impact on the world. She is known for her diary and her history of the Nazi occupation.  Her name is known by most of the educated world. 

Life has the meaning we give to it. Each morning I thank God for the gift of another day in paradise and another chance to excel in this life I was gifted. If I didn’t try in life, what a waste that would be. Life is an academy of knowledge to be learned and expanded upon. Sometimes we are dropped into a vat of total misery, just so we can learn how to rise above it. How can I tell if life is for me? I live it.  I revel in it.  I strive to be happy, always, in it. 

“Student: I don't feel like living anymore. 

Teacher: If you don't feel like doing something then don't do. This means that in finding many ways how not to live your life, you have the possibility to discover how to live your life.”

-- Santosh Kalwar

Which is the most wonderful life advice you have ever heard?

Don’t concern yourself over things for which you have little or no control. Keep drama at bay and strive to be happy always.

What do you do when you edit?

I read the document first. Is it clear, and concise? Does it make a cogent point? Does it get to the point in short order, or is it too wordy? Less is more. Then I go through it for punctuation, grammar, and spelling. Editing is not that difficult, it’s just that few people actually do it. Look at many of the answers on Quora. There are 3–4 paragraphs to answer a question where a simple “no” would suffice for any intelligent person. It might be my military background but, get to the point. 

Why is hair such an important feature of our personal image?

I don’t know why people feel this way. I’ve been losing mine for years and it hasn’t affected the way people treat me, the women I’ve been with, or the opportunities I’ve made for myself. We put more stock in our looks than we do in showing people who we are inside. How sad is that?

“That's what real love amounts to - letting a person be what he really is. Most people love you for who you pretend to be. To keep their love, you keep pretending - performing. You get to love your pretense. It's true, we're locked in an image, an act - and the sad thing is, people get so used to their image, they grow attached to their masks. They love their chains. They forget all about who they really are. And if you try to remind them, they hate you for it, they feel like you're trying to steal their most precious possession.”

-- Jim Morrison

How can I stop being an introvert and being scared of people and become more outgoing?

Embrace the fact that you’re okay like everyone else. Develop a “they’re probably more afraid of me than I am of them” mentality. Everyone has issues, the trick is not to judge others lest we be judged. Don’t worry about other people. Be yourself and strive to be happy always. They might just like what they see and hear.

Have you ever witnessed someone's "what goes around comes around"?

All the time. I chalk it up to karma catching up to them. Like attracts like, so if you’re good you’ll probably reap good things. But if you’re an ass surrounded by people just like you, what are the chances they’ll take advantage? Liars get lied to, thieves get stolen from, cheaters get cheated on, and killers will sooner or later die a deserved death. Better to be good. Better to make good choices and decisions and strive to be happy always so you don’t have to deal with the drama of bad karma.

Why is it easy for people to laugh at the mistakes of others? Do they have a perfect life?

No, and that’s usually why they laugh. Their life isn’t all that, either, so they laugh at others to cover it up. Or, and I fall into this category, they so identify with what you did because they’ve also done it. The latter will probably come out and tell you this, however, where the faux egotist will probably not. I have found that people who have a good life are more understanding, and those of us who make mistakes usually have a great life because we know how to deal with this kind of thing through humor.

"First they ignore you, then they laugh at you, then they fight you, then you win.

-- Mahatma Gandhi

My wedding is tomorrow and I'm having second thoughts. What should I do?

Pay attention.

Are there always good days in life?

There will always be good and bad days. Life, like the universe, is about balance. If you have no “good days in life” then you either aren’t paying very close attention, or your life is out of balance. If you have no bad days, look closer. Life is about the choices and decisions we make. Your life is what you make of it, what you choose it to be by the choices you make. If your life is out of balance, perhaps you need to make better choices. Most importantly, though, strive to be happy always.

What do you do when you get lost in your thoughts? How does that feel?

When I get lost in my thoughts I’m not paying attention to now. Sometimes, this not a good thing, and I have to make myself concentrate on what I’m doing. I end up running red lights, typing gibberish, ignoring people talking to me, rereading a page I’ve read three times already, and such. Basically, I’m not in control, and that does not feel good. 

“I would switch on a baseball game and pretend to watch it as I cut the empty space between me and the television set in two, then cut each half in two again, over and over, until I had fashioned a space small enough to hold in my hand.”

-- Haruki Murakami

How do people who love what they do make you feel?

Great! There is much we can learn from those who really love what they do. I loved what I did in the military and that taught me how to ensure I loved what I did when I transferred into the civilian sector. If you don’t love what you do, this is a choice you make to be miserable. Better to look for something you really love doing with people you love doing it with, or for. Learn to be happy always!

I'm a 14-year-old boy. I have a girlfriend. Why is my girlfriend angry with me and doesn't wait for anything?

You’re a 14-year-old boy and, I assume, she is a 14-year-old girl. You won’t understand this for several years, yet, but your age really explains everything. I was in my 40’s and women were still having issues with me because, well, they’re women. You need to embrace the real fact that women are from Venus and men are from Mars. Sometimes, in a quirk of reality, oil and water can, begrudgingly, mix.

Is it true that no one is perfect?

If everyone was “perfect” would there be someone who was more perfect? If so, what does that say for the others? If only one person was perfect, where are they? Why haven’t they shown themselves as the almighty perfection they are? The reason is that no one is perfect. Perfection lies with God, and mankind even has an issue with that. So much for perfection.

"We have all heard that no two snowflakes are alike. Each snowflake takes the perfect form for the maximum efficiency and effectiveness for its journey. And while the universal force of gravity gives them a shared destination, the expansive space in the air gives each snowflake the opportunity to take their own path. They are on the same journey, but each takes a different path. 

Along this gravity-driven journey, some snowflakes collide and damage each other, some collide and join together, some are influenced by wind... there are so many transitions and changes that take place along the journey of the snowflake. But, no matter what the transition, the snowflake always finds itself perfectly shaped for its journey. 

I find parallels in nature to be a beautiful reflection of grand orchestration. One of these parallels is of snowflakes and us. We, too, are all headed in the same direction. We are being driven by a universal force to the same destination. We are all individuals taking different journeys and along our journey, we sometimes bump into each other, we cross paths, we become altered... we take different physical forms. But at all times we too are 100% perfectly imperfect. At every given moment we are absolutely perfect for what is required for our journey. I’m not perfect for your journey and you’re not perfect for my journey, but I’m perfect for my journey and you’re perfect for your journey. We’re heading to the same place, we’re taking different routes, but we’re both exactly perfect the way we are. 

Think of what understanding this great orchestration could mean for relationships. Imagine interacting with others knowing that they too each share this parallel with the snowflake. Like you, they are headed to the same place and no matter what they may appear like to you, they have taken the perfect form for their journey. How strong our relationships would be if we could see and respect that we are all perfectly imperfect for our journey."

― Steve Maraboli

 

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteers as a chaplain at the regional medical center.