Sermon for Sunday - June 1, 2014: Celibacy and the Priesthood

"The first thousand years of church history, celibacy was expected but it wasn't required. In the second thousand years they mandated it. It's what we call a discipline...In other words; it's a man-made kind of rule. It's not the like Jesus and the Resurrection and Easter. So they can change this if they want. It's like changing [eating] meat on Friday. Will they change it? I don't know.'' 

-- Bill Donohue, president of the Catholic League for Religious and Civil Rights

Like so many rules that become a part of religious "lore," few of them have any real basis in the teachings of a given prophet.  As stated above, these are man-made rules that probably had some purpose back in the day.  Take the Hebrew stance against eating pork.  It was very dangerous back in the day to eat this unclean animal.  Now days, prepared right, pork is very safe and popular.  Rules like this hearken back to times when doing the right thing meant not getting sick and living longer.  Jews were long considered witches for this very reason.  While everyone else was dying of the Black Plague, most Jews would go on about their daily business simply because of their cleanliness.  Almost every aspect of Hebrew life and culture was in place for a reason.

Personally, I think celibacy found a home in Christianity because mass transit, circa 50 A.D., was a pair of sandals.  For an Apostle or a priest to travel any distance to spread the Gospel, they would be gone constantly.  Where is there room for marriage?  So, if you were to be of any value it made since that devoting yourself totally to your work was a more reasonable path.  But travel has come a long way.  Too bad the priesthood didn't keep up. 

Mass transit and mass media of the 20th century should have made this rule moot.  The onset of computer technology should have put a nail in the coffin of priestly celibacy.  But, maybe it was all about control.  Maybe it was about a "good old boys club."  Regardless, I think we can see what the ultimate price for this lack of female influence has cost mankind, and the church, down through history.  Men in serious need of getting laid were the cause of the Crusades, the Inquisition, spending untold fortunes building Vatican City, wholesale slaughter of the Aztec culture, not to mention the recent spate of sexual misconduct with children (which has probably been going on since day one).

"So they can change this if they want."  Considering the Christian priestly past, maybe this is long overdue.  Other sects of Christianity allow priests to marry and it seems to work out fine.  At least we have yet to hear of any little boys being diddled in their parishes, although I think they had a hand in several American Indian campaigns where women and children were slaughtered.  Do we chalk that up as youthful exuberance?  Hmmm.

This is all just the opinion of an old Catholic that never understood how a priest could give any counseling on subjects they know nothing about.  Smoking, alcoholism, and celibacy would seem to be right up their alley, however.  Now, this is a cold, uncalled for view that does not give great credit to those modern day priests that have contributed so much to medicine, science, and philosophy.  The problem here lies with the old saying by John Northebrooke in 1577, "A penny naughtily gotten, sayth Chysotoms, is like a rotten apple laid amoung sounde apples, which will rot all the rest."  In the 1300's Geoffrey Chaucer's Canterbury Tales quotes an even older proverb, "A rotten apple's better thrown away Before it spoils the barrel."

Maybe it isn't too late to salvage Catholicism.  Now if we can get some women into the priesthood, the Catholic church finally come up to date and into it's own in the 21st century.

Too much?

As usual, this is just my humble opinion and it could very well be wrong, and disputed at length by anybody too closed minded to consider change as anything but bad.  Everyone has an opinion.  Please be sure to share yours with the world in the spirit a peaceful, creative debate and discussion.

God be with us all.

Note:  The Sunday Thought for June 1, 2014 was posted early as I am going to be traveling to my new adventures in Mississippi this weekend and did not want to deprive my readers of their much anticipated pastoral opinion.  Like the Sears & Roebuck catalog of old, I'm sure my posts are read just prior to being used as free butt wipe.

Father's Day: Time to "Man Up"

"It is easier for a father to have children than for children to have a real father."

-- Pope John XXIII 

And, with this statement, herein lies the problem with our society today:  Males not acting like fathers or just outright abandoning their children and their responsibilities.  I use the term "males" here as it pertains to the sex of the individual.  The fact that they don't live up to their responsibilities as a father, makes them so much less of a man as to cause other real men to shun them as cowards.  So, let us be clear on this point:  If you shun your responsibility as a father you are a coward, period!  There is no excuse that can make this right.  If the mother prevents you from being a father and you are not constantly in court fighting for your rights, you are also a lazy coward.  NO EXCUSE!

Our young people today are failing, and it can, for the most part, be traced back to lack of a male parent taking responsibility.  If you are a man and know a male that falls into this category, you have a responsibility as a man to tell him he needs to man up and do the right thing.  As a man you need to take action and make sure he understands how he is failing himself as a man, and the child as a father.  There is absolutely nothing more important in our lives than the children, and anybody that abuses or neglects their child is a criminal and I personally think they should be castrated so they cannot have more.  But, then, I take a much harder line on this for the sake of the abused children and because our legal system is a joke.

"Be a dad.  Don't be "Mom's Assistant"...Be a man...Fathers have skills that they never use at home.  You run a business and you can't dress and feed a four-year-old?  Take it on.  Spend time with your kids...It won't take away your manhood, it will give it to you.

-- Louis C.K.

My dad was a good father.  He taught me values, occasionally at the expense of my butt cheeks as he laid a two inch leather belt across them while telling me how much more it was hurting him.  It took me becoming a father to understand what he meant.  Child abuse, you say?  No.  I deserved every bit of it.  I firmly believe if he hadn't done everything he did, I wouldn't be here today.  I was a seriously, high active, handful.  Mom constantly put herself between us as I got older; fearing that one of us would go too far.

"My mother protected me from the world and my father threatened me with it."

-- Quentin Crisp

I remember her putting the fear of God in me one day saying, "Wait until your father gets home!"  He came home and I locked myself in the bathroom, forgetting you can open it with an icepick in the little hole.  I realized it, almost too late, as the door knob jiggled and I had one leg out the window.  The door flew open, I leaped to freedom, and I could hear my dad yelling behind me the inevitable truth:  I would have to come home sometime.  And, as usual, he was always right.  Through all of this another inevitable truth was constant:  I loved my father with all my heart.

As a child he always took me fishing, hunting, and camping.  He taught me the rudimentary aspects of survival that would be built upon during my military career.  He was "engaged" in my life.  When I had my motorcycle accident in high school and damned near killed myself, he chewed my ass for scaring mom half to death, and made sure I got the best of care.  I knew I had scared him as well.  When I signed up for the Air Force, he fell asleep in his chair with the recruiting brochures open on his chest with fond memories of his own time in the Air Force.

What Is A Dad? 

A dad is someone who
wants to catch you before you fall
but instead picks you up,
brushes you off,
and lets you try again. 

A dad is someone who
wants to keep you from making mistakes
but instead lets you find your own way,
even though his heart breaks in silence
when you get hurt. 

A dad is someone who
holds you when you cry,
scolds you when you break the rules,
shines with pride when you succeed,
and has faith in you even when you fail...

- Unknown

Good, bad, or indifferent, my dad was present; he was engaged.  He is the rock I learned values from.  He is the man I tried to grow up to be.  I succeeded in many ways and failed in a few as well.  He says I have always made him proud.  I would like to think that is true.  I would like to think that, returning to be with him in his later years proves this.  I can think of nothing else I would rather do.  He is, after all, my father.  I love him dearly.

I would also like to think that I was at least half the father he was.  I'm not sure if I measured up.  My son says I have nothing to be ashamed of.  He may be right as both of my children have turned out so much better than I could have ever dreamed.  I hope I had some small hand it that, especially with my daughter as the only thing she ever wanted to be was a mother, and she has aced that.

"The father of a daughter is nothing but a high-class hostage. A father turns a stony face to his sons, berates them, shakes his antlers, paws the ground, snorts, runs them off into the underbrush, but when his daughter puts her arm over his shoulder and says, "Daddy, I need to ask you something," he is a pat of butter in a hot frying pan."

-- Garrison Keillor

I will be back home again, in Mississippi, when Father's Day roles around on June 15.  Back home where I now belong.  Back home with my parents, to help them and enjoy them for the time we have left together, and I hope it is a long time.

I will take my dad fishing, and I may even take him hunting or camping.  I know I will be taking him on "foodie" road trips.  We will bond again, as father and son, and make new memories to last a lifetime.  This is what a father does, and this is what a son owes his father.

"By the time a man realizes that maybe his father was right, he usually has a son who thinks he's wrong."

-- Charles Wadsworth

Is That All There Is?

"Opportunity is missed by most people because it dresses in overalls and looks like work."

-- Thomas Edison

I have heard much discussion from people about an inability to get ahead in life and a concern that this is this all there is.  Talk of people that are tired of taking two steps forward and three steps back.  I was reminded of the young millennial that went to the Christian rock concert and, like at most Christian concerts, was asked to raise his arms and accept Jesus into his life, which he did.  There were no fireworks; no warm glow of the Holy Spirit filling his soul; nothing.  He left disillusioned in Christ and God.  He now considers himself an agnostic bordering on atheist.  Really?

Consider that this young person was called to task, not by Jesus or God; this young man was called to task by his own desires for something more in his life, something larger than himself, something greater.  He now seeks to blame the very power he so much wanted to be a part of.  Or, did he?

The first thought that came to my mind when I heard this story was, "How selfishly typical of a young person."  His faith was not all that if he immediately jumped at a letdown.  Why wasn't his first concern to question his strength of faith?  He seems to be more in need of a scapegoat to blame for his life being crap.  Personally, I think God helps those that help themselves, and this "slacker" was found wanting.  In truth, he was found wanting by himself.  It used to be thought that if you didn't feel the "Holy Spirit" enter your life, you just weren't ready yet; it wasn't your time.  Nowadays it's an excuse to do what everyone has found to be the easy way out - blaming someone else for any serious lack of effort on your part.

"Waiting for God to 'do something' is a colossal waste of time and missing the point.

Let's be honest. When we say we are waiting for God (being all sanctimonious and all like we deserve a prize for demonstrating patience toward God), what we're really waiting for is results. And not just any results. We're waiting for the results that we think should occur. I'll get a better job. My kid will finally make something of himself and quit asking me for money. My friend will be cured of cancer. Even if the things we are waiting for are great, wonderful, justified things, we're still waiting on things - not God. That is believing in God as a dangling carrot, not the God of the present.

Be with the God of the present. Open your heart to receive the life-affirming, eternal Love that grounds our existence. Open your eyes to see the beauty in the now, even in the worst of times. Sometimes such beauty seems like a mere glint in the midst of darkness, but it is there. Open your ears to hear the still voice of the Spirit calm and guide you."

-- Rachel L. Roberts, blogger, rachellroberts.com/blog 

This young man is now "moving forward" with his life. He has found motivation and purpose. More important, he has given up religion in favor of atheism. And, he still has missed the point. God moves in mysterious ways, my friends, and God does not necessarily show you what is done as it is up to you to see the glory of it. This young man was gifted what he hoped for, a second chance, and he totally missed the miracle of it all as he was so focused on seeing no miracle happen. He was so focussed on his selfish desire, he couldn't see the forest for the trees, so he left the Christian concert in the park and went home. It will probably never occur to him that even this small amount of faith could change in his life.  His "gift" was God showing him a path of self-sufficiency. It will never occur to him that all the good he accomplishes from this point forward might be the hand of his creator opening his mind to possibilities. He was too selfish.  He is another example of "children" continuing to miss the point and their path... because it is so much easier not to search.

"This means that the work of God must actually begin with God. Many times this means careful discernment; most often this means a renewed sense of opportunity. Opportunity is abounding around us, if we simply have eyes to see. It is in the midst of opportunity that we discover the grease-stained mechanic, cranking away at the rusted out carburetors of down-trodden society, and breathing life back into the spark plugs of the human soul. It is in opportunity that we discover invitation, as that mechanic stretches forth his grime-encrusted hand and invites us to come look at the engine…But work, in proper perspective, is relationship. And the mechanic is waiting."

--T.E. Hannah, author

God the mechanic, reached out at this young man's invitation with answers he so desired.  In his selfishness, the young man ignores a miracle which occurs in his life.  He misses the glory that is God.  When it comes time for you to begin your search for something better, to lift yourself up from where you are in life, and to consider faith in something larger, don't look so hard for a "savior" to make things better.  If you are constantly looking for God you will miss the opportunities presented by God for you to consider.  You are already saved, now you simply have to realize it and figure out what to do next.

Miracles happen around us all the time, but if we are too focused on selfish desires we will surely miss them.  The next time you have to go back inside for your glasses before driving to work, and then pass a deadly, multiple car accident which happened just a minute before you arrive at the scene, think about the minute it took for you to go back in the house for your glasses.  What plan does God have for you that your life meant so much?

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteers as lead Chaplain and Chaplain Program Liaison, at the regional medical center.

Memorial Day 2014

There are those among us that have no concept of sacrifice for liberty and freedom.  God is disappearing from the dialogue of most Millennials, and their country is awash in debt and illegal aliens. Those that can suck from the public teat as though it was their God given right, yet they give nothing to deserve it.  This is the society we now live in; a society of whiners and complainers that berate the very country that gives them freedom while shying away from their responsibility to die for that freedom when required.

This lack of respect and patriotism is painfully evident when certain religious groups disgrace themselves, and their country, by interrupting solemn funeral services of those that would gladly die for this disgraceful group's very right to treat these dead with such disrespect.  This makes as much sense to me as yelling, "The Indians are attacking!  Quick, shoot the soldiers!"

The fault for this lack of respect is us.  We assumed our young people would just naturally soak in the patriotism we want them to learn.  How do you learn what you haven't experienced?  How do you cherish freedom you didn't earn?  How do you teach a loss of freedom to those that have never had it threatened?

"The tree of liberty must be refreshed from time to time with the blood of patriots and tyrants."  -- Thomas Jefferson

Agree with a strong, robust military or not, it is what guarantees your freedom to not agree.  Do not target the soldier for your discontent with the political, economic, or social problems in this country.  These brave men and women do a thankless job that some thankless people cannot begin to understand.  My hope for them is that they never find themselves in a position of needing these fine people, with a president that tells our brave soldiers to "stand down" when there are American's at risk.  It would serve them right to be left out to hang like the poor souls in Benghazi were, by a gutless, cowardly administration, but I hope they never find themselves in a similar position.

This Memorial Day I will celebrate the brave men and woman of our military services, past and present.  I will also remind everyone that the military are not the only ones putting themselves in harm's way in the constant search for peace and understanding.  I will remind others to remember the U.S. Foreign Service; the consular and diplomatic services of our country.  They risk much in the service of security and peace.

God of all, we pray,

Keep in your heart all the brave men and woman who voluntarily sacrifice, with little expectation of thanks, all they hold dear to protect and defend those that cannot defend themselves.

Bless all of those that have gone before, dying for the same proud and patriotic principles this country was founded on.  And forgive us for what we have asked of them, and continue to ask of those that come after, as they defend your children from themselves.

We ask that you give us the strength to accept the things we cannot change, the courage to change the things we can, and the wisdom to know the difference.

We humbly ask all of this, not as Christian or Jew, Muslim or Buddhist, Pagan, atheist, or other faith.  We ask this as inhabitants of Earth, which in your wisdom you put in our care, forever hoping we will learn to govern it with love, peace, and enlightenment.

Amen.

The Path: A Fork in the Road

At the end of this week one half of a good team leaves for Mississippi.  At the end of next week, I will leave.   Although Rick was family, we knew little of each other until he came to work with me.  Over the past year we have grown close as we overcame obstacles on the job, and enjoyed good company when we were not.  Our new friendship and closeness as family will continue; the team will continue. When I wrote The Path last month, I was after something that would define why I write; why I post so many ideas that seem to have become so important to so many readers, whether they agreed with me or not.  I had no idea how important it would become to me, and how much it would define that which was about to happen in all of our lives.  

We leave behind us many memories and new friends, as well as some old, to carry on where we leave off.  Their task will be multiplied without us but I know they will persevere because these are the quality of people I have come to know, respect, and love.

For me, I leave behind many old friends, many dear friends that have no idea the effect they have had on my life.  These are friends I fully expect not to see again in this life, but hope like all get out that I do.  These are friends that have literally saved my life; friends I have cried with when they hurt, lent a shoulder to when they needed a friend, and laughed with when we did something stupid.  There was plenty of stupid.

We tend not to think about the effect those that we leave behind have had on our lives, and the effect we have had on theirs.  They are friends and acquaintances that will be missed, and this, for the most part, is true.  But who we leave behind is at least as important as what we take away, for without these cherished few we take nothing with us but what we brought, and isn't that just sad to consider.

I leave these friends, these comrades, these members of an extended family, one of the few things I hope they will understand, as it comes from my heart.

The Path

This is my path.

It is not your path, it is mine.

Good or bad, it is my path.

I must travel it alone.

That is your path.

It is not mine or theirs, it is yours.

Good or bad, it is your path.

You must travel it alone.

At time our paths might intersect

Or, run parallel for a while.

We will visit, laugh, and cry.

Exchange experiences and offer advice.

At some point we may part

Perhaps to join up again

As our destination is the same

And our journey is long.

I wish for you a smooth path,

And a long, interesting, journey

Full of emotion and life,

Family and friends.

We will not arrive together,

Though our destination is the same,

But, I will wait for you, my friend

As I know you will wait for me.

Blood & Gore: An artist's, explainable, inept patch for failure.

Blood and gore in art has no social redeeming value and the audience it is presented to are, for the most part, not psychologists or psychiatrists.  Generally they have no concern for the inner workings of the human mind, or the horrors contained within, except in the context of music videos, movie genre, and getting the shit scared out of them.  That we consider this entertainment is troubling to me.

As an artist, writer, and photographer, i find it to be a sad reflection on the artistic ability, or lack thereof, to get a message across without the use of such tactics.  It is even sadder, for those of us that remember, for a society that has forgotten how a cliffhanger was done in the past, when directors knew how to command the attention of an audience without cursing, blood, gore, and blatant sexual acts.  These were the times when art and craft in film meant something.  Now days blood and gore is simply a crippled vehicle used by artists that have reached the bottom of their creative bucket trying to appeal to an intelligent audience.  The problem with this last statement is two-fold.  First, the general audience really isn't all that intelligent and, second, the artist isn't really that concerned with their own creative abilities.  It is all about the money which the zombie public are willing to part with for ninety minutes of plot-less crap.

But, should we be surprised?  In today's world of McDonald's, Ikea, particle board, and paper laminates with wood grain, we have come to expect less that perfection; art by machine.  We live in a world of machined construct and our artists have nothing to offer but what they know, so they pump out hour after hour of the same garbage, one hoping to out gore the other and the audience paying big money for the opportunity of applauding their latest attempt at "low brow" crap.  I feel sorry for the musicians who's music is held hostage by contracts allowing studios to hire these crap mongers to render an "artistic" interpretation for the viewer, since we are all so obviously incapable of interpreting the musical offering for ourselves.

I offer to my readers two music videos from two totally diametrically opposed genre.  Art, like beauty, is truly in the eye of the beholder.  One of these is very visual with blood and gore, the other leaves the immediate visual method and aftermath of death to the viewer's imagination.  No brains blown out across a living room wall, no blood drenched carpet from slit wrists.  The question, after you view the two videos, is which one do you find artistic?  Now, ask yourself why.  Why does this appeal to you?  Why does this speak to you?  Why do you like this?  You will not have to ask "what" this says about you or your feelings because, if you've truthfully answered the "why" of it, you already know the "what."

Where are we going as a society and as humans?  Is this the road we must take to be entertained?  What does this say about us?

Why?

Be at peace.

https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=94bGzWyHbu0

http://vimeo.com/29465404

Sermon for Sunday - May 18, 2014: Closed Minded Ministers

"...that is why I'm here - it's not to preach, or to think I'm better then anyone, but to learn and open new paths. I think this is where we have so many problems on here sometimes... you cannot be an interfaith minister and have a closed mind!"  -- Dani 

This statement was made by "Dani" on our Monastery's minister discussion site.  Our rebellious group has been relegated to our own piece created of heaven which we call HOME.  Our "crimes," if you will, dealt with our desire to discuss topics frowned upon by some closed minded hypocrites that have even infiltrated the inner workings of the Universal Life Church (ULC).  The majority of ministers that receive ordination through the ULC do it as a joke or a way they can perform weddings for family and friends.  There are those that do it so they can spread their own personal message of faith.  Our small group found that the serious nature of conversations was frowned upon by the site managers unless we conversed in private and not on the main page for all to see.

This minister, Dani, has stated very concisely what it is our small group feels about being a minister.  It is the very reason I call my own blog "The Path," and invite all faiths and beliefs to visit, read, question, comment, and discuss all topics on which I felt a need to write.  But like most other faiths, in particular those based in the Abrahamic, or Semitic tradition, the ULC has a hierarchy of leadership which seems more interested in squelching interfaith discussion than embracing it.  And, like most organized religious groups, the leadership sees no reason to discuss their decisions or ask for member opinion.  So much for open mindedness.

The "owner" of our site, which she created to enable continuation of our frowned upon discussions, recently informed us of several interesting pieces of information.  The first is that other ministers of the ULC, the ones that gave us the moniker of "rebels," want into our group and have found that to be a difficult task since we guard our group's membership closely.  The second, because we guard the membership so closely, we are one of the smallest groups (12 members) on the minister site and, even though we have only been opened for two full months, we have 67 active discussions ongoing, each with an average 20 comments.  

This is of no great import to anyone that normally visits my blog.  I felt it important, however, to let everyone see that this is not some hobby that we play at for our own entertainment.  This is what we do and this is how we feel we want to minister.  We firmly believe that all peaceful faiths and beliefs should be able to come together for constructive and informative discussion and debate.  This is how we stay abreast of public opinion, and our own.  Dani's last sentence states our belief of ministry in no uncertain terms:

"You cannot be an interfaith minister and have a closed mind!"

The Good We Do

People who know me will tell you how happy I am, virtually all the time.  One can tell this just by looking at me.  It is that obvious.  I have been humbled many times by people telling me how much they either appreciate what I write, how much I have guided them and, to my embarrassing discomfort, how fascinating they think I am.  I find that fascinating.  Some, who have not met me in person, have even commented as to what an attractive man I am.  What?  I'm sorry, but I just don't see any of it.  Handsome, I might concede with some arm twisting.  They obviously haven't seen me when I'm not sucking my beer-gut in.  Then again, they might have had one drink too many, which dulls the sense of sight.  Some men suffer from this malady more than they'd admit.    As for those who praise my work, their response to my heartfelt denial of said praise is for them to prove they actually read my posts by throwing my own words back at me, "I am my own worst critic."

Out of the mouths of "babes" (aka, mature women).

I do take criticism from others very well, however, I usually just don't give a shit.  I don't take compliments well at all; I really just don't see it.  I tried explaining to one of my readers that, most of the time, I'm not really cognizant of what I'm writing and half of that time, when I finish a post, I tell myself, "Huh, I did not know that."  For the most part, what I write comes from "I know not where" and gets put in my "WTF" file until I can figure out for myself what in God's good name I was talking about.

Recently a cherished reader critiqued one of my posts as "gibberish."  Actually, in my invitation for folks to read this particular offering, I stated it was a "bit of nonsense."  I see our descriptions as the same thing, so this means I actually beat her to the critique before the post was even published.  She reads me all the time, and I'm flattered that we both felt the post was wanting.

So, why did I post it?  Other than to make sure people are really paying attention, I don't think one should just post the good stuff.  I'm in no way perfect and I have no qualms about letting people see that some of my stuff just sucks.  If it's in my head it's going to come out, good or bad.  Bad usually happens, as with the post in question, when I take a detour to my favorite meditative place, my "happy" place, the "Cusp of Infinity."  I usually struggle to make any sense of what I see or think there, so it should be no surprise that any post based on a visit here would be concerning. 

I guess I should be happy when, at the end of the day, I have managed no harm and no offense has been taken.  I am humbled by the accolades and gratitude which I garner for the little good I do and the guidance I am able to impart.  I am not one who lives for the limelight.  I have spent one long career that required I shy away from that very thing.  I try to lead a very simple, honest, and humble life.  If I desired public spectacle, you would find me behind a pulpit, scripture raised high like a mighty sword or held out in front like a protective shield.  I am not one to cry havoc, to the masses, and let slip the dogs of war.  You will not hear me preach the fear of hell and damnation, the lack of tolerance and understanding of an "all knowing" and vengeful God.  

Am I perfect?  Oh, hell no.  Reality check: I'm a self-admitted hypocrite and sinner.  But, if you ask me a question, my answer will tell you the way it is, as I see it.  If you need guidance, I will try to give you the best advice I have to offer, you may not like what I tell you but, I suppose, that will be an additional issue for you to deal with.

Perfect?  Who among us professes to be perfect?  Even Jesus kept trying to tell everyone he was just a man.  Are we any better than Jesus?  I think not, and if you do, I'd say you're a self-involved, delusional dumb ass.  Romans 3:10-12, “None is righteous, no, not one; no one understands; no one seeks for God.  All have turned aside; together they have become worthless; no one does good, not even one.”  Well, maybe a few.

Will all of these compliments and prayers from so many, and all of my blogging and posting guarantee me a place in heaven? No, and why should it. My peace has to be made with God, "mano y deity." I honestly don't see a "heavenly" paradise in my future, and this is not a bad thing. I have a paradise right here on earth. I have been put on a path and I'm excited to see where my journey takes me next. The destination is important, yes, but not more important than the journey we take to get there. Everything will present itself at God's pleasure.

I know I am on a path which may transit many lives. I know that "time" is all in how you define it. I know reality is not about the destination but, rather, about the beautiful journey; the laughing and crying, hard work and good times, the people we meet and the family and friends we enjoy along the way. It is about learning, learning to help and to love.  I think it's about searching for God's truth as it pertains to each of us.

Our very existence is about the good we do.

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteers as lead Chaplain and Chaplain Program Liaison, at the regional medical center.

Dating Site, Meat Market, or Ministry

Her:  "Good afternoon my friend. Just a quick vent if you don't mind: Love how some of the men here think I'm rather naïve so to speak. It is rather trying on this site sometimes and yet more entertaining than the Sunday funnies! My father raised no fool. Im not sitting here trying to catch a date? Know what I mean! Or to be guided in any other direction or path than only the path I choose! Thanks for letting me vent my friend. How are you? Getting some help with packing and stuff? Your mother and father are in my prayers always. Thanks my friend. God Bless~"

Me:  "Word of advice?  I hate to say it, but testosterone follows us (men) everywhere.  Some of us manage to be mature about it and some are just asses.  You shouldn't have to, but, change your photo.  You are a beautiful woman, I can't blame them but that doesn't excuse them either.

So, why is it that some men have to act this way?  Is it a chemical imbalance, lack of proper upbringing, loser, dumb ass, or just incapable of finding a date?  The latter would not surprise me considering their less than plebeian actions.  This interaction all took place on the ministry site of which we are both members, and it is not an isolated incident.  A ministry site; a site for ministers; is it any surprise when we consider what Catholic priests are capable of?

In every organization, church, monastery, YMCA, Boy Scouts and the like, there will always be an embarrassing faction of men that make it tough on the rest of us that are trying to put our best foot forward.  We try to represent what is best in men.  Unfortunately, as we used to say in the military, one "aw shit" can negate a hundred "atta boys."  All people focus on is the bad apple and they will assume the whole barrel is suspect.

Real men cry.  Real men can wear pink, and make it look macho.  Real men can look at a woman without making her feel like she's being undressed or raped.  Real men treat a lady like a lady.  If you can't act this way around civilized people, then I would recommend you frequent any number of low life bars in your piece of heaven where acting the fool is common place.  I'm sure you will find the kind of "quality" woman that you have come to expect in your life, and she will be eager to please.

These "men" lack the social grace to do anything a real woman would find acceptable, including satisfying that woman in any manner, much less an ability to treat them with any respect.  These men are the reasons I have run into brick walls trying to find a relationship with quality women my entire life.  Real men have to work twice as hard to prove we aren't them and they aren't us!  

If those of you "men," and you know who you are, would just stay away from nice women, it will make the lives of real men so much easier and women will realize that there is a knight, in albeit slightly tarnished armor, out there waiting to sweep them off their feet. 

Spiritual "Me Time"

“To sit alone in the lamplight with a book spread out before you and hold intimate converse with men of unseen generations - such is pleasure beyond compare.”  -- Yoshida Kenko, author and Buddhist monk (1283-1350)

Relaxation means different things to different people, but how many of us consider contemplation, meditation, or the spiritual as a means of relaxation?  How many of us come back from a well-deserved vacation wishing we had another week to recover from it?  The only way I can truly relax is to go off by myself and enjoy some introspective analysis and thought.  This may sound like much more mental cramping than the average person might want to endure, but for me it works.  Solo camping, hiking, fishing, biking and the like, can be mentally therapeutic for me.  If the weather will not cooperate, I find a glass of wine while listening to Brazilian jazz while I bake or cook seems to accomplish the same thing but, I risk phone and visitor interruptions which defeats the entire purpose. 

And this is the entire point:  Spiritual "Me Time," not spiritual me and several other people time; not me and my significant other spiritual time; it is spiritual "me time."  If you want to have a romantic evening with the love of your life you don't invite George and Emily to come along, unless that is your kinky definition of romantic evening.  If you truly want to relax, work out issues, or contemplate the meaning of life, solitude is the only way to go.

I will undertake another of my own spiritual journeys on the first of June as I set off across country in the car.  I love driving, especially when I'm in no rush to reach a destination.  I find driving to be soothing to my soul, when I'm not cussing out some moron for cutting me off because he was too stupid to look, that is.  And even then, I take a cleansing breath after the rant saying, "and may God bless," because even morons need God's blessing.

I will take my camera and my laptop, a writing pad and some pens.  I might even take my sketch pad as I haven't exercised my drawing talents for some time now.  I will bring a blanket and a cooler, sandwich fixins and some beer.  I will contemplate God, the world, and my humble place in the grander universe.  Most of all, I want to write about my favorite subject, my path.  Fernando Pessoa (1888-1935) was a significant poet, writer and philosopher of his day in Portugal, and he explains our journey like this in his work, The Book of Disquiet:

“Life is an experimental journey undertaken involuntarily. It is a journey of the spirit through the material world and, since it is the spirit that travels, it is the spirit that is experienced. That is why there exist contemplative souls who have lived more intensely, more widely, more tumultuously than others who have lived their lives purely externally.”

He suggests that contemplation can be as meaningful as wide ranging physical travel and experience.  Mother Teresa, on the other hand, lived a life of contemplation based, in part, on ministering by "going out physically or in spirit in search of souls all over the universe," and contemplating "by gathering the whole universe at the very center of our hearts where the Lord of the universe abides, and allowing the pure water of divine grace to flow plentifully and unceasingly from the source itself, on the whole of his creation."  I think they're both right.  As for Yoshida Kenko, I too shall probably find myself with my laptop opened in front of me while holding intimate converse with many folks of unseen generations.  Such is my way.

It beats the old way by a great deal.  In times past I, like many other people, would find time for contemplation and introspection in the one place a person was guaranteed to find a short-lived bit of privacy with his own thoughts.  Hopefully one would find something other than the back label of a Lysol can, or a year old copy of Ladies Home Journal to relax with.  Although I must say, in there was a copy of Cooking Light, I would find myself taking a few moments longer at "meditation."  I joke that everything important I learned in life came from periodicals on the top of a toilet tank.  I'm probably not the only one.  Kids now days won't be able to say this down the road.  The toilets are tankless, and their hands never let go of their electronic personality prosthetic.

In today's busy world where we are inundated with these electronic gadgets that give us rare, if any, moments to ourselves, it is important to make room for "me time."   Do it often, and do it outside to get some fresh air.  Make enough time so you can relax, empty your mind, and allow your spirit find your path.  Oh, and don't forget to turn off the damned phone.  I'm sure the world will continue to spin without you.

Tarnished Armor

"You can't make a woman love you if she don't."  

-- Anonymous

Is it the feeling of self-betrayal when you get close enough to suddenly realize your knight’s “shining armor” is a bit tarnished; that “Mr. Perfect” is flawed?  Is it when your hopes of finding someone more perfect than you, melt away to reveal just another human being with frailties of their own?  Or, is it when you suddenly step back from all the noise to realize they've been screaming how “they aren't all that,” and you know it's probably true, they aren't?  It always helps, though, when they're trying to make you understand they aren't what you hope they are. 

Self-betrayal is the feeling you get when you realize you have been in engaged in selective ignoring; hearing and seeing only that which fills in the perfect picture you want to see.  Does any of this make it wrong?  No.  It makes it all part of the ongoing tragic comedy we call life, and it isn't nearly as interesting from the cheap seats as it is from the orchestra section, and it is even better if you’re on stage and involved.  

Women aren't alone in this, oh no!  Men suffer from the same distorted perceptions when it comes to looking for the "perfect" woman.  Save the cost of buying that sports car at sixty as it won't help.  Everyone can see that you're a sixty year old adolescent hoping that you can get it up if a woman says yes.  Take the money and a woman your own age, and book a cruise to the South Seas.  She might not love you in the manner you're hoping for, but if she can dance and carry on intelligent and interesting conversation, what the heck!  If she's a close friend, life is almost perfect.    

Even Don Quixote had issues.  He was a man looking for honor, love, and excitement, and chivalry, all the while fruity as a bat cake.  At the end we learn so many lessons from this story; lessons about expectations, judging books by their covers, and unrequited love.  The lesson we learn about tilting at windmills, as we do battle with those things that exist only in our minds.

I see myself longing for the knights of Arthurian legend and realizing, instead, we all have much more Alonso Quixano, don Quixote de la Mancha, in us.  We all tend to view our world with distorted perception, striving to realize more than we are, only to discover, if we are lucky, we always have been.  

You can try to be something you aren't, or imagine yourself to be something you are.  If the armor is a bit tarnished, do we need to look for one that isn't?  "He, who is without sin," are few and far between whereas "people in glass houses" are a dime a dozen.  Most of us are flawed, and some of us are tilting at windmills.  Who among us is really that perfect?  Maybe "Mr. Right" isn't a white knight after all.  Maybe he has a bit of color; a chink in the armor; a slight imperfection we call "being human."

So, I think maybe we could learn that, when your "knight in shining armor" has a touch of tarnish or a chink in the armor, it might mean they've been tilting at windmills.  Are they perfect?  Absolutely not.  Who is?  But, they are probably more colorful and much more interesting to be around.  Love, if it's there, will find a way.  If not, then have one hell of a time while it lasts and enjoy the life you have this time around.  Maybe next life will be different.

"Mr. Right is coming, but he's in Africa, and he's walking!"

-- Author unknown

Who Owns You?

You are either free or you are a slave.   Ask yourself, "Who owns me?"  Nobody?  You are your own person, correct?  So, you owe nothing on your car or your house, and you have no outstanding debt on those credit cards, right?  For most of you the answer is a resounding disappointment.  Almost everyone in this country and, for that matter, the world, has debt of some kind.  If you do, then you are owned.  You are probably owned by the bank or other lending institution like a mortgage company, Visa, or Mastercard.

Not to put too fine a point on it, and please excuse the language, almost all of you are someone else's bitch.  Who's fault is that?  More than likely it is your own damned fault.  You fell for every trick in the book entitled, "How to Hook a Sucker."  There are a lot of you out there, so don't feel like the Lone Ranger.  There really is a sucker born every second.

Okay, now what to do about it.  Well, I recommend "Tony's Three Step Process."  First thing you have to do is admit you're a dumb ass.  The second thing you need to do, and this is the hardest, stop spending money you do not have!  The only people that spend more than the common Joe Bag O'Donuts is the federal government, and look where that's gotten us.  The third thing you have to do is get the hell out of debt!  This step of the process is actually pretty easy after you conquered the second step.

So, how do you get out from under a mountain of debt?  Get rid of everything you owe money on.

I can hear the doors of your spoiled rotten brain slamming shut at the prospect of selling the new car, downsizing the apartment or the house, and cutting up credit cards.  Your mind is reeling with, "What?  Yeah, right!  Be real, dude!"  The problem is you aren't saying all this to me, you're really saying it to yourself as you, once again, easily convince yourself there is no way your sorry ass is ever going to be able to exercise any self-control, which really means that you have no self-respect that you haven't been able to purchase on account... on account of you think you can't live without the purchased self-respect.   But, you see, in reality you don't even own your self-respect - the bank does.!  Truth be told, if we were to remove everything around you that you really don't own you'd be...well, we would finally see you; the real you.  Take away the toys you don't own, take away the big house you don't own, the fancy clothes you don't own, the jewelry, computer, television, stereo, and your precious cell phone, and what are you left with?   Whatever it is, you own it.  You own it.  And, if you own it, the bank doesn't.  Now that is something to be really proud of.  Now you have self-respect.  Now you are free.

The next time a commercial asks you, "What's in your wallet?" ask yourself who's bitch you are.  Better yet, tomorrow when you get up and look in that mirror (which you probably don't own) ask yourself, "Who owns me today?"  When you decide you don't like the answer; when you decide you don't want to work for someone just to get out from under working for someone; when you decide you really want to get off of the revolving charge account you humorlessly refer to as a life, maybe you will find what real happiness is all about.  Oh, and, until you make this decision, stop praying to God for assistance.  God helps those that help themselves.  There really is no free lunch.

How good does it feel to be debt free?  How good does it feel not to be someone's slave; an indentured servant?  I can answer that.  It feels pretty good.  It feels good because it is actually easier to get rid of all the debt than it is to accrue it.  You just have to want it; want freedom more than servitude.  There are plenty of financial advisers out there to help, and many of those are free.  The question isn't what is in your wallet, it's who?  Who owns you?  Who's your daddy today?  How much do you pay each month to keep the "image" alive, that facade of freedom?

When you finally pay off your debt, you'll find it is much easier to work on your soul.  After the monetary debt you still have the debt you owe yourself - salvation.  

Now, salvation is where the work really begins!  Are you up for it, or do you like having self-respect that doesn't belong to you?  Hey, if it doesn't bother you it sure won't bother all the rest of your friends that also don't own theirs.  If you have to wallow in debt, best to do it with friends who are also in debt, right?  Birds of a feather and all that.  Debt really is the best kept secret, that everybody knows.

Who's in your wallet?

Editor's Note 

(re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card) 

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider another viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and then engaging in peaceful, constructive, discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning the opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we do afterward, and what we learn from the experience.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, and instructor. He is founder of the Congregation for Religious Tolerance and author/editor of the Congregation's official blog site, "The Path," which offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination.

Loss of a Loved One: Part 2

I was blessed to receive a friend request from a lovely lady today.  During our brief give and take I learned her father had been military Intelligence, as I was, and that he had passed.  None of this was more evident, however, than the memory, love, and respect she still feels for him.  I apologized to her for unintentionally stirring the emotional pot.  Working passed her mistiness, she reminded me that "letting out your emotions anyways is good for the soul."  I know this, but I sometimes need to be reminded.  This set me to thinking that perhaps my own father's recent close call has created a numbness to my own emotions concerning the reality of his mortality.  Maybe it scared the crap out of me.

I am so easy to shed a tear at the drop of a hat, yet I hold my emotions to personal issues very close.  I am the first to share an incident, but rarely do I share my true emotion to the incident.  I have never had to confront the loss of parent of child.  The only thing I am absolutely positive of, were I to let it all hang out when it ever does happen, it will not be the reaction of a mature adult.  I wonder if it ever is.  Reading how my new friend discusses her loss, memories, love and respect for her own father with such grace, I only hope I will can find the obvious strength of this woman half my age.

"How we deal with death is at least as important as how we deal with life."

--  Admiral James T. Kirk, Star Trek II:  The Wrath of Khan

As with life, I think we need to meet death head on with all the emotion and gusto we give to life.  Our religious and spiritual belief can assist us after the event takes its emotional toll, but we must let it take that toll.  The emotions we feel in dealing with events in our life is what helps us to grow, prepare for our own inevitable passing, and minister to others that will eventually face death in one aspect or another.  Perhaps I shouldn't be so concerned with how I handle loss.  What is important is that I feel the emotion at all.  

The emotions accompanying loss is as much proof of who they were, as it is proof of who we are. 

Sermon for Sunday - May 11, 2014: Mother's Day

A Mother's Love

There are times when only a mother's love

Can understand our tears,

Can soothe our disappoints

And calm all of our fears.

There are times when only a mother's love

Can share the joy we feel

When something we've dreamed about

Quite suddenly is real.

There are times when only a mother's faith

Can help us on life's way

And inspire in us the confidence

We need from day to day.

For a mother's heart and a mother's faith

And a mother's steadfast love

Were fashioned by the angels

And sent from God above.

--Author Unknown

What can we say about mothers?  There are mothers that are everything, and mothers that are not so much.  There are mothers that could think of nothing more fulfilling than to have children and devote the time necessary to raising them.  There are those that wish they could, but life has dealt them a hand requiring the need of a paycheck, so they give what they can and make the most of the time they have.  There are those that have children out of a sense of duty, wishing to get it done and over with, and forget the responsibility motherhood demands just as quickly.  I wonder, for these women, how it feels to be looked upon as "breeding stock," and be forgotten, just as quickly as they conceived, by the child they care so little about.

"I think that each person has the right to define that word for themselves. My mother (who both gave birth to me AND raised me) wasn't much of a mother. I have a close friend who I consider to be my chosen mother. I know people who are adamant that the woman who raised them is their ONLY mother (even if that's not legally correct), and I know people who feel strongly that the woman who raised them is NOT their mother (adopted and otherwise). I don't really feel that it's my place to tell them they're wrong...it's THEIR life, and they have the right to define the roles of the people in their own lives. Just as I do. Just as you do."  

-- Gaia Raain 

Real mothers know who they are, and mothers rightfully judge those that play at it and those that are serious about the role; other than God, I think they are the only ones that have earned the right.  It is not enough to proclaim you went through the "right of passage" by begrudgingly bearing the pain involved with squeezing a large baby out through a comparatively small opening, as humbling as that concept is to any honest man.  The question is, how do we define a mother in the context of Mother's Day?

"MY definition of mother is someone who loves unconditionally and places the needs of her children above her own, on a personal level, and not only with words, but also actions." 

-- JoHn S.

Thank you, JoHn.  I think that says it all.

May God bless and keep all mothers, and help those that fall short to realize their full potential and what motherhood truly means.