Would You Stand for Christ? (Updated from 6/9/2015)

The Denial of Saint Peter - Caravaggio (1610)

"Christians, I want to ask a question and I want you to really think about it.  We hear of our brothers and sisters in Christ getting beheaded etc.  Today, if it was to be here, would you have enough faith to stand for Christ knowing what would be done to you, or would your faith be weak; would you deny Christ because you were scared?  Even a disciple of Christ denied Him because he was scared of what the people would do to him."

-- Pastor Summer Woods

Pastor Summer asks an important question.  It is easy to answer... when you don't have the blade of the knife against your throat.  But, have you really thought about it?  

Have you run through the mental film footage of being roughly thrown to the ground, made to kneel while your hair is grabbed to pull your head back, exposing your neck to an insane fanatic and his razor-sharp blade?  You can smell his fetid breath and feel his spit on your face as he asks you to deny Christ and convert to Islam... or lose your head.  How long will it take you to answer?  How long does it take you to consider the ramifications of your answer?  What if you realize it doesn't matter to him what answer you give.  It might matter quite a bit, however, to your immortal soul.  It probably matters much to God.

But Peter said to Him, "Even though all may fall away, yet I will not." And Jesus said to him, "Truly I say to you, that this very night, before a rooster crows twice, you yourself will deny Me three times."

-- Mark 14:29-30

As a career military man, God notwithstanding, I would rather die free than live a slave.  But, God is withstanding.  If you truly have God and Christ in your heart, you will not hesitate to stand firm and resist these invaders, as you will also resist the temptation to deny your God.  To do this there must be no doubt in your heart or faith.  Doubt breeds weakness, and there can be no weakness in your resolve.  Look into the insane eyes of the man about to end your life and say, "Allah, forgive them, for they know not what they do."

Hell is surely paved with the souls of religious heretics, and hypocrites.  The question we all must ask is, which are we?  I think the answer lies in those with whom we take a stand.

Now Peter was sitting outside in the courtyard, and a servant-girl came to him and said, "You too were with Jesus the Galilean." But he denied it before them all, saying, "I do not know what you are talking about." When he had gone out to the gateway, another servant-girl saw him and said to those who were there, "This man was with Jesus of Nazareth." And again he denied it with an oath, "I do not know the man." A little later the bystanders came up and said to Peter, "Surely you too are one of them; for even the way you talk gives you away." Then he began to curse and swear, "I do not know the man!" And immediately a rooster crowed. And Peter remembered the word which Jesus had said, "Before a rooster crows, you will deny Me three times." And he went out and wept bitterly.

-- Matthew 26:69-75

I only wish my faith was as strong as my willingness to defy tyranny and terror.  I have no doubt that Summer's faith is so much stronger than mine, yet we will both give our lives without denying what we believe.  It sounds a bit over the top, but they're probably going to find a reason to kill you anyway, so you might as well show them how Christians accept their faith.  We should all be as resolute in our faith and resolve.  Summer ended her question, at the beginning of this post, with a statement of faith: 

"Friend, today we need to pray.  We need God’s word in our hearts, not just our minds.  We need our faith built strong in the Lord.  Don't fear man, what man can do, but what God can do.  Build up that faith, put on the full armor of God, and think on that, today. Do you need more strength, more faith?  Go to God!  He will help you!"

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Divorce, Weak-Minded, Stuck, Married, Agreeing, Following

“If you spend your time hoping someone will suffer the consequences for what they did to your heart, then you're allowing them to hurt you a second time in your mind.”

-- Shannon L. Alder

Have you encountered a moment, where evil attacked you and tried to harm your life?

Yes, but I divorced her.

Why can't we control a laugh when we are with friends?

Because it’s frickin funny! I chuckle at things told at the table next to us. Oh, I can control it, but why try? Some things just have to be laughed at. And, if I do control laughing out loud, I’m laughing my ass off inside.

What’s a weird talent that you have? I can (almost) fit my whole fist in my mouth.

I can do armpit farts.

What are the long-term benefits of maintaining integrity?

By definition, you will be known as an honest person with strong moral principles; a person of integrity. It may not benefit you anything, except that you will have your integrity… for the long haul. 

Can anyone ask me a yes or no question?

Yes.

How do you handle your angry spouse?

For any normal spouse, if she is angry… there must be a reason. If she doesn’t want to discuss it, I leave. If it concerns me, we can get to the root of it. If she doesn’t want to discuss it, I leave. Anger needs to come out in the open so you can get to the root of it. It is the only way you can calm the situation down. Or, you can leave.

“Anybody can become angry — that is easy, but to be angry with the right person and to the right degree and at the right time and for the right purpose, and in the right way — that is not within everybody's power and is not easy.”

-- Aristotle

How do weak-minded people become successful in the music industry or acting industry? Is that possible? If so, how do you do it?

You hear about all the weak-minded people in those industries having breakdowns and committing suicide. If you’re weak-minded, you’ll need to become strong-minded, to deal with the schedules and stress.

Should I let an African tribe breed me to get back at my ex?

If you want an African tribe to “breed” you, don’t pin it on your ex. Go have fun.

What’s something you realized you had to change about yourself?

When I married I thought life was perfect. For 25 years I had to fight to keep the marriage together. I was miserable and not very happy. I divorced her in 2000, and I learned to be happy again. I found how to strive for true happiness always, and in all things, regardless of my circumstances. It was a simple choice, and I made it for my life.

My marriage is sexless and I'm tired of it. My husband has refused to touch me. Each time we get horny, he rejects me and it makes me use tools to satisfy myself. Should I keep a man?

You shouldn’t keep that man. There are men out here that are not a waste of your time.

Will negativity get you anywhere in this world?

No friends, a shit job, and a pit you can be miserable in with your negativity. It will get you backward.

According to the proverb, what does familiarity breed?

Familiarity breeds contempt.

“Familiarity breeds contempt and children.”

-- Mark Twain

What do you do if you’re feeling stuck?

I go fishing.

How is it loving for a guy to have sex with his girlfriend outside of marriage?

It depends if you believe in the sanctity of marriage. My son doesn’t, because he sees where mine ended up. But, he has been living with the same girl for years, and they are very happy.

Is it the professor’s fault or the student's, when all of his students got low scores during exams?

He is either a lousy teacher or his students are morons.

Do you consider yourself very good-looking?

Not a bit. I’m overweight and balding, but that has not stopped good-looking women from hitting on me. My personality is what draws them in. Even at 70 years of age, I still have the charm.

What are the reasons for cowardly behavior? Is fear the only factor or are there other reasons?

"Fear" sums it up.

I'm not happy with my marriage. What should I do?

Don’t stay in the marriage. It isn’t fair to him or you to draw this out. The sooner you end the misery, the sooner you can both get on with your lives.

“The first step to self-discovery is to be honest with yourself. Never fool your subconscious.”

-- Mwanandeke Kindembo

Is anyone completely happy being married after 20 years?

I wasn’t, but then, I was in love. It occurred to me that she really wasn’t my best friend. This turned out to be the big issue. Be in love with a good friend and your relationship will last longer.

When did you realize that there really is a talent gap?

When I almost didn’t pass art class and then sold a painting. The art teacher was an egotistical putz.

What's something you have to explain to your spouse constantly?

For 25 years of our failed marriage, I tried to explain to her that I loved her. I wanted her to expand her horizons, get a job, and meet people. I ended up destroying whatever I thought I had with her. She wasn’t the best catch, and I wasted 25 years of my life. Live and learn, always.

If my partner states that they want to break up, and I express that I don't want that for us and I love them, is that manipulation?

No, that’s honesty in the face of failure. If they want to break up, it’s over.

Everyone learns differently and has unique talents. Some people excel in crafts, trades, or other non-academic fields. But society seems to push the idea that going to college is the only way to succeed. Why?

Many colleges push the idea of socialist ideology. College is a great way to expand your knowledge base, but you can’t buy into all they’re selling. Be your own person, and learn what they want you to. When you graduate, you can trash the political line they wish you would accept. Go to college and play the game, but don’t lose who you are, in the process. 

Why can't we take the time to be negative?

Because it is so much better to be creative than negative about something. Find a compromise that will satisfy everyone.

“When you provide value to others and when you are not full of negativity but instead irradiate amazing positive energy; people will always come to you because they feel good around you. And when someone is walking away from you; it's because their vibration and your vibration are not synced. Rise to the top and negative people will slip away. it's law!”

-- E. Christian Trejo

 

Why do we agree to be managed by people who delivered nothing, has no actual job, and they lack any common sense or reality connection?

If they aren’t family to the owner, you can “politic” for their job.

How would you answer the question, “Why should we hire you as a cashier?”

“I’m 70 years of age. I retired from military Intelligence. I have enough money, so I don’t need yours. So, who do you feel like trusting? The 18-year-old?”

When is a good moment to say I'll be damned if I'll stand and listen to this?

If my “integrity” is called into question.

Is it truly horrible, and much worse, in your thirties compared to your late teens/twenties?

Do you mean, when a person’s hormones were raging? When you get past that, my thirties onward were pretty sedate, not counting the bad marriage.

Are fies clever or stupid?

What the hell is a “fie”?

Why do some people feel the need to tear a person to shreds when they should already know he/she has serious self-esteem issues to begin with? I'm referring to instances when criticism is invited, but it's often something said/done that is benign.

Tearing a person to shreds is never needed. A person who does this, says more about themselves than they can ever say about another person. If criticism is invited, there are ways to critique that can be constructive, rather than tearing a person to shreds. If you can’t deliver a friendly critique, it would be better that you say nothing.

 

"Never build yourself up by tearing another down." 

-- Larry Winget

 

Why do stupid people follow stupid people?

Stupid people don’t do their due diligence. Voters are the worst.

Why do the elders say, “Don't waste your time sitting in a place where you don't have respect”?

Search me. I sit where I like, People may not respect me, but that is not why I sit there. I give respect, and not getting it back says more for the other people than it does about me. “Elders” need a lesson in letting go of minutia.

Can one achieve success by flattering their supervisor?

Maybe, but sooner or later you’ll run into a supervisor who expects results, not flattery.

Do you ever wonder where all your hate comes from?

Back when I was married, I knew. When I divorced in 2000, I remembered how it felt not to feel hate. I loved her so much, and I still do. I just couldn’t live with her lies… and her “friends.” I’m kind of funny that way.

What are the problems faced by people living near the river channel?

I would think “flooding” in the rainy season, would be a big problem.

How stupid do you have to be, to be smart?

The question makes no sense. Many “smart” people are on par with many “intelligent” people. Smart people know enough concerning a plethora of things. Whereas, most intelligent people know a lot about a few things. Finding a person who is smart and intelligent, is a rarity.

 

“Why do smart people exist, if not to figure out convoluted problems?”

-- Mikhail Bulgakov

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Pride, Children, Motivation, Happy, Gorillas, and Cheating

 

“It takes courage to grow up and become who you really are.”

-- E.E. Cummings

What was wrong with don't ask and tell if you want to? Why do we need pride month? It's nothing to be proud of. It is what it is. We should have not gone beyond that.

But, we have… and there is no going back. It is what it is. We have to find a way to accept it.

Why do you think bullying is such a problem now? What can we do to stop bullying?

Find a way to tell the “bully” they are good enough, and they don’t need to bully others to prove it. They need to see that "bullying" is only showing the world they are lacking good sense. They are showing the world they are moronic. And, worse than this, the people who associate with them, are viewed the same way.

How can people wake up if they don't see the truth?

The entire point of “waking up” is to see the truth.

What would your reaction be if someone had made a Facebook page calling you a bully, for bullying them in the past with your full name and surname on it?

First of all, they are full of shit. I have never bullied anyone. So, if they did this, they would be bullying me, themselves. This is the entire point they are trying to make… and failing. They become what they dislike.

What could the repercussions of making a Facebook page labeling someone a bully for bullying you in the past with their full name on it?

They have become what they hate.

How stupid am I compared to you?

The fact that you haven’t learned what I have, doesn’t make you stupid. It makes you ignorant of what I have learned. I am not very intelligent, but I am pretty smart. I say this with all humility. I am sure there are things you know, that I have not learned.

“I feel sorry for anyone who is in a place where he feels strange and stupid.”

-- Lois Lowry

Why are my children very stupid?

Unfortunately, the usual answer is, "The apple doesn’t fall far from the tree."

Why are people so stupid when it comes to politics? 

Acting like simpletons, they believe everything they are told. Instead of doing their due diligence, they listen to their usual news channel telling them what they want to believe. It is how we got saddled with Joe Biden and a country he is selling down the Rio Grande.

For successful people who love their job, I want to ask: How did y'all find the right career for yourself?

U.S. Air Force. After 23 years, if you don’t know what you want to do... you’re lost.

Why do people respect more educated people in society than uneducated people?

I would respect an uneducated person who climbed above their “station” using "street smarts." It would take a lot of moxie to pull that off. 

Do you have an alternative saying to "it is what it is"?

It’s reality.

What is the definition of an idiot, and why are so many people considered idiots?

A stupid person, or a person of low intelligence. It isn’t that so many people are idiots, they just act like idiots. They act like idiots when they should be minding their Ps and Qs.

 

“Don't be afraid of being scared. To be afraid is a sign of common sense. Only complete idiots are not afraid of anything.”

-- Carlos Ruiz Zafón

In what ways can the experiences and triumphs of others serve as a source of motivation in our personal journeys?

There are different ways to learn. In this case, you can learn from their lessons.

Question for men: what makes a man "feel" in love with a woman, esp. one's wife? The kind of love that produces monogamy and makes you not really notice other women? We all know that infatuation fades in a relatively short period.

Unfortunately, for some time we have been experiencing a great uptick in divorce. And it isn’t all the man’s fault. Women have been having affairs, almost, as much as the man has. We marry because we think we are in love, but love and friendship go hand-in-hand. The “infatuation” with your ”mate” fades as the relationship becomes comfortable, for one side or the other. The lack of a strong friendship, which should have existed, will send one party looking for some sexual satisfaction. We don’t look for strong friendships in our relationship, much anymore.

Reader comment: Excellent point about friendship, and how the current "hook-up culture" short circuits that.

What are some ways to handle a bully who is introverted?

Befriend them.

I hate my life with my husband. I am trying to live with him for the sake of my daughter. What should I do?

If you hate your life with your husband it, probably, won’t get much better. But, remember, you married him for a reason. Your daughter will be better off if you separate, or divorce. Separation will send a strong message to your husband. He might start to understand what your issues are. If he doesn’t, then divorce is the next step. 

How should one respond if their spouse says "I don't love you" or "You're not worth loving"?

File for a divorce. Nothing will save this marriage when the spouse gets this in their head.

I watched my wife getting creampied. What should I do?

Why did you watch it? This sounds more like your problem than your wife’s. Ask her what she thinks. She might agree with you but you won’t know until you discuss it with her.

 

"You can't go back to the innocence that your marriage is now once you have crossed that line. I think, in fantasy, is good, but to actually physically watch my spouse making love with another would be disturbing in many ways. They would not want to see me with another, either."

-- MilliiMoo

How does one get happy?

Strive for it. I strive to be truly happy, always and in all things, regardless of my circumstances. It is a choice I made for my life. I have been truly happy, ever since I made the choice.

Why doesn’t my wife want to touch me or communicate with me?

It would concern me that she might be having an affair that she enjoys more than me.

What kind of relationship do you have with your partner, husband, wife, or girlfriend?

She is my girlfriend of 20 years. We are good friends. I am her “caregiver” because she can’t do certain things without some help. We don’t fight, and I give her a stipend because she takes the burden of dealing with insurance off my back. I really appreciate her efforts. We have a good "give and take" relationship.

Are great leaders better at asking questions or giving answers?

If they are “great” leaders they are good at doing both.

My friends call me dumb because I come up with whacky ideas I know aren't true, like today I saw a feather and said, "Someone planted a bird." I'm just creative. How do I make them see?

That made me chuckle. If it were me, I wouldn’t concern myself with them. You are a free spirit, and I recognize my “lack of filter” in you. You say what you think. They can wrinkle their brows all they want. Just be you.

What is the meaning behind someone saying, "I think I know you"?

They “think” they know me. There is no meaning because they don’t know me.

“Judge a man by his questions rather than by his answers.”

-- Voltaire

Why would any man date a gorilla?

I didn’t have a choice. She was bigger than I was.

Can I share my wife with my best friends?

Have you asked her opinion? And have said this, asking her may put you in divorce court. She may not have married you to be shared by your friends.

Why do I want to become a criminal?

You have the desire to do jail time. You might also desire to be Bubba’s little "go-to piece."

What differences exist between intelligence, creativity, and talent?

Creativity is spurred by any talent you possess. Intelligence may, or may not, help in this process. A chimpanzee can paint an abstract work that will sell for a bit of cash, and the chimp is not, what we would consider, intelligent.

What is the best thing that happened to you during an exam (except for knowing the answer)?

I was so happy I took the time to study.

Why is it bad for a man to like sensitive, nurturing women?

Not from my experience. It is even better if she is a bit of a “mature” woman. It allows you to have a great relationship that you might not have with a “younger” woman.

“There’s something so special about a woman who dominates in a man’s world. It takes a certain grace, strength, intelligence, fearlessness, and the nerve to never take no for an answer.”

-- Rihanna

Who is worse at cheating, him or her?

Him. She raises kids. She pays attention to the little things. A guy is a bull in a china shop.

How do you deal with feeling insignificant? Should I boost my feeling of significance or be humble?

Being humble has little to do with being insignificant. All living beings are significant. If you feel insignificant you need to count the blessings of life, to feel the significance of humility. Life is much greater than we are, and we are a significant part of life.

Does it hurt to walk away?

Oh, yes. It can hurt like hell, especially after 25 years of marriage.

My wife is gone. Will another woman love me and not leave?

After a few years of dating, being married for 25 years and a messy divorce, I was propositioned by a woman I worked with. We have been together for 20 years. Good things happen to good people.

How do you get over your wife cheating on you?

You don’t. You keep it in the back of your mind, as a reminder of a lousy marriage.

Why do men see me as "marriage material"?

“Marriage material” doesn’t mean you will be the “brass ring” for the man’s life. You are everything a man wants, he thinks. Down the road, he may change his mind, or you might change yours. “Marriage material” is a woman a man would like to get to know, for both of you to see if you are compatible. “Marriage material” means you are worth a second, third, and even a fourth look, for a guy looking for a serious relationship.

"According to the Schriver Report on the 21st Century Man, the top categories for a marriage partner are intelligent, attractive, and sweet. None of these qualities are negative, but once you get past intelligence, the others seem to lack substance."

-- Mara Bender

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Purpose, Relationships, Superiority, Dislikes, Accidents, and Opinions

“They say a good love, is one that sits you down, gives you a drink of water, and pats you on top of the head. But I say a good love, is one that casts you into the wind, sets you ablaze, makes you burn through the skies, and ignites the night like a phoenix; the kind that cuts you loose like a wildfire and you can't stop running simply because you keep on burning everything that you touch! I say that's a good love; one that burns and flies, and you run with it!”

-- C. JoyBell C.

What’s the ultimate purpose of running?

Exercise the heart and exercise the body. Walking and running, with a good diet, can keep the weight off. I walk more than a mile at about 3:00 each morning, weather permitting.

What are 2 or 3 problems you are facing in 2024 that you don’t want to face anyone, not your family, friends, or relatives?

Getting older, a shaky memory, and a desire for unforgiving sex.

Why do I not act like an adult? I’m 18. Am I stupid or ignorant?

You are at that age where this question rears its ugly head. I finally joined the Air Force to answer the question. I stayed in for 23 years to answer it. You aren’t stupid or ignorant. You are just young, trying to be an adult. Give it time, and give yourself some time, as well.

Why doesn’t defending your self-respect/pride/ego count as self-defense?

It does, for those of us defending ourselves.

Did people have big families back then because they didn't have effective birth control, or because they needed to continue the human species?

Using effective birth control was one issue. Drinking too much alcohol might have contributed to it. Wanting a big family was the excuse. I don’t think continuing the species entered the minds of many.

How can we let children be children in this day and age?

Take them to a playground. Bring a picnic lunch. Let them be kids.

 

“By making eye contact, getting down to your child's level, offering a touch, or using a tone of your voice that conveys a desire to genuinely connect, you disarm yourself. You make it possible to reach your child more deeply and truly move forward together.”

-- Hilary Flower

Is sex necessary in a relationship?

Not really. But it sure helps.

What are simple steps to control anger?

My dad always said to take a deep breath and count to ten, and if this doesn’t work, rip his head off. Sage advice from a short Sicilian.

Who believes women are superior to males?

Given the opportunity, they can surpass us.

How many failures are a clue to just give up?

For many, it only takes one. For those who understand that failure is life presenting us with an opportunity to learn… we learn. “Many failures” are a worn-out welcome, telling you you’re on the wrong road to success. But, never give up. Take a break and attack it when you’re fresh. Keep at it until you finally find the solution and beat it down.

What should I do if my daughter is an idiot?

She is your daughter. You can still show love to an idiot.

I'm a 22-year-old single mom from Wisconsin who lives with a mom who always puts me down and calls me hurtful names. I want to just pack my kid up and run away. What should I do?

Get a job, pack your kid up, and leave. But, not before you have a serious discussion about your loss of a mother, with your mother.

 

“If mental abuse was a punishable crime, a lot of parents would be in jail serving a long term.”

-- Maddy Malhotra

 

What makes someone superior to others?

An overactive ego.

Is it necessary to establish a "universal set of moral values," or is the current state acceptable?

I established a personal set of moral and ethical values that I can stand by. The “current state” does not even come close to being acceptable for someone who wants much more than the crap everybody accepts as the norm. A "universal set" will not work for everyone.

If people think you really are clever, why do they keep having to tell you?

They want to make sure that you don’t forget. And, they probably like you.

How do you live with someone who puts you down every day?

I don’t. This is a situation that negates creativity and a positive self-image. I let it go for 25 years. I was an idiot. I filed for a divorce in 2000 and have been happy ever since.

Why are you still lying to everyone?

Well, not everyone.

Do you think they respect you too?

No. I don’t go out of my way to be respected. I respect those who respect me. It is a pretty easy rule to follow. If they don’t respect me, it is their loss, not mine. Life is too short to fight for a modicum of respect.

 

“Respect was invented to cover the empty place where love should be.”

-- Leo Tolstoy

Why are people we dislike the most the people we see often?

Not so, where I’m concerned. For one, I can’t count a person I really dislike. And I see all my acquaintances often. So, your premise is a little faulty.

How do you act around people who annoy you?

I stay away from them. Why hang around people that annoy you?

Should we believe someone when they say they are not a good person?

They know themselves better than we do, and where they set their “bar” may be much different than where we set ours. What they see as “bad” may be an opinion different from ours.

What do you call someone who never backs down on people?

Tenacious.

How do you respond to people calling you judgemental?

Hah! That’s a laugh. The one thing I’m not is judgmental. This site requires that we judge, to give someone an honest appraisal. But, for someone to call me “judgmental” is a stretch for anyone who knows me.

Is it fair for people to judge others negatively without knowing them personally?

I try not to judge. They will judge themselves when they interact with me… or not.

 

“Never judge someone's character based on the words of another. Instead, study the motives behind the words of the person casting the bad judgment. An honest woman can sell tangerines all day and remain a good person until she dies, but there will always be naysayers who will try to convince you otherwise. Perhaps this woman did not give them something for free or at a discount. Perhaps too, she refused to stand with them when they were wrong — or just stood up for something she felt was right. And also, it could be that some bitter women are envious of her, or that she rejected the advances of some very proud men. Always trust your heart. If the Creator stood before a million men with the light of a million lamps, only a few would truly see him because truth is already alive in their hearts. Truth can only be seen by those with truth in them. He who does not have Truth in his heart will always be blind to her.”

-- Suzy Kassem

How do I tell my daughter that I accidentally slept with her husband?

Accidentally? Really? You’re going to use that? And, what is his excuse?

In a situation where you accidentally did something wrong, would you take responsibility for your actions or try to shift the blame onto others if possible?

Have you seen the question where the mom “accidentally” slept with her daughter’s husband?

What are some things you simply cannot avoid in the workplace?

Fraternization. 

Why do cowards not let anyone reply to their questions?

This question makes my eyebrows knit. Why ask a question if they don’t want an answer? They may be cowards, but they have no idea what this site is designed for. They may be cowards, but they are, probably, ignorant as well.

I have no gumption, desire, or any goals in life. I’m just sad. Why can't I end it?

You are more brave than the cowardice it takes to end it.

Why do some people receive punishment for every minor action they take?

They are submissive to a madame who delights in dealing punishment for any minor action the submissive does. The submissive looks forward to punishment. It is what they live for.

 

“She wasn't afraid of him, and he liked that. He didn't want a meek mouse, no matter that he wanted someone utterly submissive. There was a difference between submissive and spineless.”

-- Maya Banks

Can it be true that one should never allow anyone to make you feel like you are not good enough?

Absolutely! Never pay attention to people who judge you. You have made it this far.

Author's comment: Well said, thank you.

Why did the young soldiers in WW2 have so much more pride in their country than the current generations?

Parenting. Some factions have no clue what communism will be like, yet they vote for the likes of Joe Biden. Mexico has a new President, and she is inviting the Chinese to open manufacturing plants in-country. Mexico is going down the road to communism, and we might be following. Pride in our country? Half of the country could give a shit.

Do people answer wishes?

Who else would answer wishes, except other people?

What helps you stay positive during the day?

I’m 70 years old. I have retired twice. I have divorced once. I strive to be truly happy, always and in all things, regardless of my circumstances. It is a choice I have made for my life, and life is a hoot.

What is the definition of being blamed for something you didn't do or weren't responsible for?

To be “wrongly accused”?

Is it justifiable to seek revenge? Or should forgiveness always be the preferred option? Why or why not?

Revenge will focus karma on you. Having karma paying attention to you is not a good thing. The preferred option is forgiveness. Karma may get to you just before trying to cross a street. You may redefine “road kill” for many others. Karma strikes when you least expect it. It is better to be on the good side of it, and forgiveness will get you there.

"The best revenge is to be unlike him who performed the injury."

-- Marcus Aurelius

 

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

I Love You! (Updated from 6/3/2015)

 

I love you. No, I really do love you, each and every one of you. But, wait a darn minute. You say love is an "attraction based on sexual desire; an affection and tenderness felt by lovers." Have I lost my insignificant mind? Maybe I lost it, somewhere in the "free love" movement of the 1960s. Then again, it's just a matter of degree, or it is a matter of definition, then of degree.

Merriam-Webster's second definition of love, is one of sexual desire, as stated above.  The first would be a "strong affection for another out of kinship or personal ties."  I think of all the definitions, this next one, number 4, could be used to sum them all up and allow us to file the other definitions behind it as a matter of degree: "Unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another, as (1): the fatherly concern of God for humankind (2): brotherly concern for others."  

I'm certain the atheists must have already redefined "number 4" to suit their non-belief in a deity.  I wonder how atheists rank on the Islamic terrorist "POM" (Perpetual Offense Meter).   I mean, you have to figure the Jewish state just flat pisses them off, and they can claim Christians as "historical" enemies.  But, what would extremists do with atheists?  I think they would make the terrorists' "little peanut heads" explode, God bless them.

“Sometimes it’s a form of love just to talk to somebody that you have nothing in common with and still be fascinated by their presence.”

-- David Byrne

So how do I make this "fourth definition" encompass attraction based on sexual desire?  Well... "My unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for your welfare seems to be heightened by how damned attractive I find you and this, in turn, seems to be expanding my concern for you through possible affection and tenderness.  What say you?"  

Okay, this is the point where they, either, laugh or turn and walk away. But, who would really say this?  Yes, yes... I probably would, but only because my sense of humor runs at a serious tilt.  It wouldn't be the worst "come on" I've ever heard, or used. But, I think it helps me make my point about how events and emotions can expand a definition without necessarily requiring we create another definition.  It is simply a matter of degree.  It plays to the point of how deep and broad your love is; what your love is ready to encompass, at any given time.

If you think you're love is an attraction based on sexual desire, tenderness, and affection, should it not also meet the criteria of being unselfishly loyal and being benevolently concerned for a person's immediate and future welfare?  If not, would it be better to define this feeling as the lust that will soon culminate in a one-nighter? I'm all about lust, but that might be for another post.

"Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into a friend."

-- Martin Luther King, Jr.

I love you, even if I don't like you.  By definition, my liking you is not a requirement for loving you.   Heck, I don't even know you, so how can I determine if I like you.  Merriam-Webster lists affection, attachment, devotedness, devotion, fondness, and passion as synonymous with love.  It also lists abomination, hate, hatred, loathing, and rancor as "antonymous" to love.  

Think about this: So, if you don't love someone, do you feel they are an abomination, or do you hate them?  Are they loathsome to you?  Do you feel malice, resentment, or ill-will toward them?  No?  Then maybe you need to come to grips with the very real possibility that it is possible to love everyone, by definition.  Or, you can feel free to choose an antonym.  It is really that easy.

"We've got this gift of love, but love is like a precious plant. You can't just accept it and leave it in the cupboard or just think it's going to get on by itself. You've got to keep watering it. You've got to really look after it and nurture it."

-- John Lennon

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Brains, Upside Down, Sex, Denial, Reality, and Favors

 

“Biology gives you a brain. Life turns it into a mind.”

-- Jeffrey Eugenides

How does the brain change when a person becomes smarter?

It gets smarter before the person is. It’s kind of funny that way.

Can AI replace humans in philosophy?

No, not until it can think without being programmed, and "philosophy" sometimes misses the intelligentsia. So much for programming.

Reader comment: I took some time to review your answers, and I am completely captivated by your unique perspective and problem-solving approach. Your responses are consistently well thought out, informative, and engaging! I just wanted to say hello, and let you know that I'm a big fan of your work on [this site]. 

Why are some people late for a job interview?

They don’t want to work.

Why are some people late for a job interview and still get the job?

Punishment.

What are some tips on being late for a job interview?

Don’t be.

Why didn't my dumb interviewer give me the job?

Uh… you kind of answered this.

“I'll take crazy over stupid any day.”

-- Joss Whedon

What if everything is actually upside down?

It doesn’t matter. We see it right side up.

How much should a 60-year-old have saved for retirement?

They should have two retirement checks and no debt. Everything he’s saved has been for retirement, and having no debt put them ahead of the game.

Reader comment: I've spent some time going through your answers, and I'm completely captivated by your unique perspective and problem-solving approach. Your responses are consistently well-thought-out, informative, and engaging! I just wanted to say hello and let you know that I'm a big fan of your work on [this site].

Who is the dumbest person on Earth right now?

Joe Biden, God bless his pea-picking little soul. 

Why does my father keep comparing me to other people who's my age saying they're normal and I'm not?

Your father doesn’t recognize a “singularity” singing the facts that no one else seems to have a grasp on. You may be wrong, but you speak your mind, not everyone else’s.

Why do people feel the need to blame America for everything?

America is not the problem. The voters are the problem. Blame the voters.

How do I know if my parents are having sex?

Is your mother always smiling?

“Parents who always whisper the word "sex" unintentionally tell their kids, "I don't want to talk about this. Get your answers elsewhere.”

-- Michael Rittenhouse

Have any of you ever had sex on a couch?

Oh, hell yes!

Why are we struggling in this day and age to figure out the sex of a child?

Blame the liberals. It is what it is.

Should we take care of our elderly parents?

They took care of you.

Is atheism in the heart or in the head?

Always in the head. They ignore the heart.

Are Americans hating each other enough to tear the country apart?

It is happening.

Is it true that people, older than you, know how to treat a lady?

By and large, yes. If they didn’t know it younger, they should know it now.

“I’m not going to sit here and listen to you tell me that it’s okay for August to hit her because she’s his wife. Or that it’s not his fault because he’s insane. If he’s insane, that’s all the more reason she should stay away.”

-- Sara Gruen

Why do people deny masturbation?

They do? Why?

Aren't most US girls into women and men?

As opposed to being into neither? Am I not understanding the question?

Do you all lay down when jerking off?

Nope.

Do younger women really like older guys?

If they’re smart. Most of us know how to treat them right.

Do older men have a sex drive or does it go away after a certain age?

I’m 70 years of age. I still have it. Am I not supposed to?

Is the only way to stop dying to die?

Yes! That will put you into the next life.

 

“Carve your name on hearts, not tombstones. A legacy is etched into the minds of others and the stories they share about you.”

-- Shannon Alder

Are narcissists unable to tell the difference between fantasy and reality?

Pretty much.

Is being offended and sensitive the same thing?

No. You can be offended and not be that sensitive. I let a lot of shit roll off my back.

Are older women valued?

Oh. hell yes!

What do you think of men who associate with low-quality women and then can't understand why high-quality women won't consider them?

It is a choice. But, the “low-quality women” certainly appreciate the attention.

Is 5' 5″ short for an adult male?

How long is his “package”?

Can someone be truly content with their current state of living, even if things are not perfect or during difficult times?

If they strive to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of their circumstances.

“We've become conditioned to compromise and shrink ourselves in order to be liked. The problem is, when you work so hard to get everyone to like you, you very often end up not liking yourself so much.”

-- Reshma Saujani

Should anyone be asking God for things they could do or get themselves?

God washed his hands of man’s greed. He gave them the wherewithal to get it themselves.

How much sex do women need?

As much as they ask for. 

When did you realize you made too many bad choices in life?

When I realized the “bad choices” were lessons I needed to learn from.

What are your most taboo sexual fantasies?

Submissiveness.

My wife thinks she's a lesbian and wants a divorce. How do I remind her that both of these things are a sin?

She, obviously, doesn’t care. Let her go. She doesn’t love you.

My daughter is divorcing her husband, but I don’t want her to. What should I do?

Support her decision, whether you like it or not. Assume she knows what she’s doing.

“Trust your instincts, and make judgments on what your heart tells you. The heart will not betray you.”

-- David Gemmell

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com