Questioning Yourself

“If you end up with a boring miserable life because you listened to your mom, your dad, your teacher, your priest, or some guy on television telling you how to do your shit, then you deserve it.”

-- Frank Zappa

What should I do first, second, and so on?

Learn to be happy always, find a focus, move forward smiling, succeed.

What does it mean to be frugal? (real-life meaning, not dictionary definition)

You buy what you really need and you do what you have to. Frugal, to me, is all about not being wasteful. Use your time constructively and don’t be materialistic in your spending.

Do you think we need another person to discover ourselves?

If you want to discover your emotional self, yes. It is hard to discover your reactions to love, friendship, loneliness, etc., without interacting with someone else.

“The best way to find yourself is to lose yourself in the service of others.”

-- Mahatma Gandhi (1869-1948), lawyer, political ethicist

Would you rather work hard today and be happy later or be happy today and work hard later?

The question comes from the wrong perspective. I’d rather be happy always! Hard work is simply a task that shouldn’t have any bearing on our happiness. Complete the task and it is a job well-done, you will still be happy. Fail at the job and consider it a learning experience, smile and move forward into the task again with more knowledge and renewed vigor.

What have you learned from exercises and lessons?

Uh... What I needed to know? Is this another trick question?

Do you love yourself? Why should you and how would you consistently love yourself?

Yes! I always try to do the right thing. I try to be selfless when it comes to others. I try to maintain an ethical sense of principles. I am not perfect, this I know, and I am comfortable with this. No one can be perfect, but I try to be the best I can be. I consistently love myself because I’m not afraid to try. Do I succeed? Not as much as I would hope, but, again, I’m not perfect. If you can’t love yourself, if you're afraid to try, how do you expect to truly love someone else?

“Perhaps we shall learn, as we pass through this age, that the 'other self" is more powerful than the physical self we see when we look into a mirror.”

-- Napoleon Hill (1883-1970), self-help author

Do class differences bother you?

Class differences are all about choice, and who am I to judge the choices other people make? They pre-judge themselves by their choices. If you choose to use the “F” word in every sentence, you won’t be welcomed in “polite” company due to your vulgar language. It is your choice. Life is all about making choices. If you choose to be on welfare, don’t expect to be welcomed by those who support you as you suck from the public teat. If you treat people poorly, don’t expect to be welcomed by anyone that won’t submit to your poor treatment of them. If we were all the same, how boring would that be? Life is all about making choices about how to live your life. Make better choices.

What is the single greatest life lesson you have ever learned? How did you come about learning it? What experience or experiences prompted you to learn it? Why do you think it is such valuable knowledge?

Being happy always! My messy divorce was the impetus for it. You can’t carry hatred with you through life as it is counterproductive to, truly, living your life. I’m not sure there is anything more important than being truly happy all the time. The alternative simply sucks.

Why is everyone chasing status?

Strokes their ego? Happiness? When I was in the Air Force I was always put in for the “Intelligence NCO of the Year” award. I was told I never won because I refuse to kiss ass and play the game. I told my bosses to stop putting me in for the award because I’ll never change who I am just to win it. If I’m doing a good job, just give me a pat on the back and say so.

A doctor once introduced himself to me using his title, I said I was pleased to meet him and introduced myself using my title. We laughed about titles and he asked if I respected him as a doctor. I asked him if they still called it the “practice” of medicine. He said, yes, then he laughed. Touche!

“Some people think they can find satisfaction in good food, fine clothes, lively music, and sexual pleasure. However, when they have all these things, they are not satisfied. They realize happiness is not simply having their material needs met. Thus, society has set up a system of rewards that go beyond material goods. These include titles, social recognition, status, and political power, all wrapped up in a package called self-fulfillment. Attracted by these prizes and goaded on by social pressure, people spend their short lives tiring body and mind to chase after these goals. Perhaps this gives them the feeling that they have achieved something in their lives, but in reality they have sacrificed a lot in life. They can no longer see, hear, act, feel, or think from their hearts. Everything they do is dictated by whether it can get them social gains. In the end, they've spent their lives following other people's demands and never lived a life of their own. How different is this from the life of a slave or a prisoner?”

-- Lieh-tzu

What have we learned today?

Will we be exceedingly happy from this point on? If not, then we haven’t learned nearly enough of what is important in this life.

How do you realize your importance in someone's life whom you love the most?

You mean, you don’t know yet? When they love you the most, you’ll know. When you know, you won’t be asking this question. When you know, you’ll be too busy smiling.

What is an example of a time when you experienced success?

From 1972 until the present I have been doing what I want to do. I rate my success on how happy I am, in what I do, and in my life. I have learned to be happy always.

“Accept what life offers you and try to drink from every cup. All wines should be tasted; some should only be sipped, but with others, drink the whole bottle.”

-- Paulo Coelho, lyicist, novelist

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteers as a chaplain at the regional medical center.