Women - Be the Pedestal

On the darkest days, when I feel inadequate, unloved and unworthy,
I remember whose daughter I am and straighten my crown.

I have published, on numerous occasions, posts concerning women.  I've talked about their concerns over weight, looks, men, stress, and my own belief that there is not a pedestal high enough to put them on, or safe enough.  They keep falling off.  From what I've seen and heard, falling off their lofty pedestal has much to do with self-image.  That self-image seems to be driven by actions and words of the caring, loving people around them, as much as by media and society.  Maybe women need to listen less to people that haven't walked a mile in their shoes, and start listening more to their own heart.

Women look in the mirror too much.  Put on some makeup, if you must, brush your hair and move on, but many will stand there and critique themselves against some asshole's off the cuff remark or some article about society's new view on what makes a woman beautiful or what men find attractive.  When did women start listening to men?  My view is there are enough female asshole's out there judging women without listening to some dumbass man's viewpoint.

I think it is marvelous that over the past few years "plus-sized" women have been the new vogue.  Those actresses, singers, and other popular entertainers are emphasizing that it is okay to feel good about you.  It is all about a makeover; dress, makeup, personality, poise, and your outward attitude toward life in general which makes you beautiful to those around you.  I'm all about staying healthy, and if you can manage that while carrying a few extra pounds, hey, if you're happy, why not?  Too many people spend way too much time finding all new ways of dipping our "ugly bags of mostly water" into hard candy shells of societal acceptability.  Large is becoming the new beautiful, so get used to it.

What do I find attractive in a plump woman?  Other than a vivacious, happy personality, the ability to speak intelligently, and kindly, is a big plus.  I'd think that, of all women that should know the damage done by throwing stones, overweight women would be more tolerant and understanding of others, being extra cognizant to not offend.  But, there are those women who would be well served to sew their pie hole shut because opening it usually does more harm than good to themselves and whatever cause they're commenting on.  Joyce Behar, co-host of The View, and comedians Roseanne Barr and Rosie O'Donnell, are a few of my least favorites.  They open their mouths and we are assaulted by the current "party line" from the League of the Perpetually Offended.  Instead of being great role models for gay, overweight, or the politically opinionated, these women prefer to alienate all of their potential fan base save those of like mind that buy into the star's ever changing lines of bullshit.  Where they could be attractive role models, they settle for being seen as just another woman offended at herself for not being able to measure up to their own sad view of society's expectation.  They seem to be forever in denial that they could be beautiful souls by simply being... well, beautiful souls.   

Of course, I feel this way about all role models.  If you are in the public eye, you are a role model and our children will be watching you.  If you don't want to be a role model, go crawl back into the madding crowd that is the rest of us.  Sports figures, actors, entertainers, should all be censured for acting like morons in front of our children.  If you elect to be an entertainer, then shut up and entertain me.  I don't want to hear your political views, that you think white cops should die, or why you slapped your wife around on video.  If you want to talk smack about crap you know nothing about then give up acting and take on the mantle of divisive activist, like Al Sharpton, and make your money off the multitude of perpetually offended people stupid enough to buy into your particular line of crap.

I think that all agents for entertainers and sports figures would be well served to put handlers on them until they prove they can act like responsible adults.  Handlers can head off most irresponsible acts like beating on the paparazzi, assaulting women, or removing your clothes in public.  Tempering making offhand statements the press will get hold of or stupid statements around microphones they assume aren't active is a task which even presidents and their handlers find difficult.  These so called "role models" have enough money to stay out of public scrutiny by hiring a car and driver if they want to get shitfaced while out on the town for heaven's sake.  They least they can do is try to act like responsible adults.

Anyway, I digress.

“She was of exactly the same essence as Adam. She was in no way an inferior character, but she was his spiritual counterpart, his intellectual coequal, and in every sense his perfect mate and companion.”

-- Pastor John MacArthur, teacher, author

I love women; short, tall, skinny, fat, freckles, lesbian, I really don't care.  Hell, I love lesbians, if for no other reason, because they also love women!  Those that know me or read my posts know I put women on a pedestal.  Women are the mothers of our species.  I don't expect more from them, they live with enough genetic expectations without other folks ladling helpings of extra crap onto their already full plate.  I think they need to expect more from themselves, love themselves, and be the very best at what they are.  For me, this is what makes a woman beautiful... this is what makes anyone beautiful.  I have great respect and admiration for anyone that gets up off their dead ass, cleans themselves up, dresses nicely, has a happy, outgoing attitude, and treats other people with the same respect they, themselves, seek.  There is nothing that turns people off more than someone being in a state of constant complaining about being miserable because they're too damned lazy to be anything but.  Life is not as bad as they would make it out to be.  Life is generally bad due to our lack of trying to make it better.

“And I shall be a Father to you, and you will be sons and daughters to me, says THE LORD JEHOVAH, The Almighty.”

-- 2 Corinthians 6:18

I put women on pedestals.  Does that piss you off?  Fine, then climb down and be offended.  You don't have to thank me for opening the door for you, offering to carry your bags, paying you a compliment, or sacrificing my umbrella for you when it starts to rain.  I don't require your thanks; it was the way my mother brought me up.  I do it because I was taught to respect women, protect them, be polite, and put them on that damned pedestal.  It is what real men do, just because.  Does this define me as a sexist?  I'll take that as a compliment, then, even though I think women are as at least as capable as men to perform most tasks, if not more so.  I can live with your offense at my respect and love for you.  

The only thing I ask of you is that you hold me when I cry.

When I hear a man verbally or physically abusing a woman, it just pisses me off.  First of all it makes all men look bad.  Secondly, why in God's name has she hung this situation long enough to be subjected to abuse?  I'm not sure what grinds my ass more, a man that has no control or a woman who excuses him.  There is no excuse for being an insensitive asshole, not in my book, and certainly not when it concerns a woman or a child.  Better they remove themselves from the abuse and surround themselves with loving, caring people, and an environment where they can grow and flourish.

Take comfort there are still men that put you on pedestals.  Enjoy the men treating you like porcelain dolls that need protection.  Sure, you might not want or need it, but it makes us feel good to do it.  I think God was first to put women on pedestals.  God created Eve to be the mother of all mankind and Mary to be the mother of mankind's salvation.  Men have tried to reinterpret Abrahamic scripture so women are viewed as subservient, yet they come off as revered in scriptures of the Abrahamic faiths.  Men should recognize and respect this special role offered to women, and women should be the pedestal, as well as be on it.  They are, after all, the marble foundation of man's life.  Maybe you don't want or require the attention, but you might, at the very least, relax and try to bask in the attention we feel the need to shower upon you.

The only thing we ask in return is that you hold us when we cry, and there will be those days.

As for the opening quote, I found this more complete version online, and still have no idea of the author:

"More than a conqueror Loved by the King of Kings Righteous by the blood of the Lamb Child of God.

I am God's daughter and He is my Heavenly Father. He is the King of kings. I am Jesus' sister and He is the Prince of Peace. My royalty gives my immunity from Satan, the prince of darkness

Sometimes on dark days I think "nobody cares and nobody's coming." Then I remember who sends thoughts like that... and I straighten my crown. 

On the darkest days when I feel inadequate, unloved and unworthy, I remember whose daughter I am and I straighten my Crown! I Love This So Much!! I Love My Father Jesus Christ So Much! 

On the darkest days when I feel inadequate, unloved and unworthy, I remember whose daughter I am and I straighten my Crown! Happy Mother's Day! 

On the darkest days when I feel inadequate, unloved and unworthy, I remember whose daughter I am and I straighten my crown! I know this is probably a Christian sentiment but I am my father's daughter and THAT is what I need to always remember."

Who am I to judge?

Editor's Note 

(re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card) 

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider another viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and then engaging in peaceful, constructive, discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning the opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we do afterward, and what we learn from the experience.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, and instructor. He is founder of the Congregation for Religious Tolerance and author/editor of the Congregation's official blog site, "The Path," which offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination.