Questioning Brains, Judging, Happy, Deity, Happiness, and Sex

  

“All truly great thoughts are conceived while walking.”

-- Friedrich Nietzsche

Why does my brain get more active late at night? My mind is a storm of thoughts and ideas, relatively more than during the day, which very often leads to many epiphanies.

Remember what the epiphanies were and use them late at night. I answer most of the questions around 3:00 in the morning, after my mile walk. My mind is fresh, and not being pulled here and there. By 8:00, I’m ready to make breakfast.

Why do people say ages 30-40 are the best when they're actually horrible ages?

Actually, these are the best ages to work at a job.

If your 30s are young, what is the immutable scientific evidence behind it?

There is none. Go forth and make mistakes. Learn from the mistakes. This is what life delivers to us: Learning.

Reader comment: And learning, and learning… it never ends.

My reply: Indeed!

How can anyone deliver anything under the destructive polarization of so many ideologies, self-righteous individuals with fake causes and lack of profound foundational approaches? How do you deal with the noise?

You don’t. You are supposed to deliver, so… deliver. That is your job.

People are teasing me as I am innocent and I don't know anything. I am really feeling too low and getting demotivated. How can I get out of this situation?

Stop listening to people who are, probably, more ignorant than you are. You are innocent, not stupid. Stop listening to the teasing. You know what you are capable of, so be capable.

At what age do you feel like you truly 'grew up'?

25. I was in the Air Force for 4 years, starting my 5th year, at 25.

“We are all alone, born alone, die alone, and—in spite of True Romance magazines—we shall all someday look back on our lives and see that, in spite of our company, we were alone the whole way. I do not say lonely—at least, not all the time—but essentially, and finally, alone. This is what makes your self-respect so important, and I don't see how you can respect yourself if you must look in the hearts and minds of others for your happiness.”

-- Hunter S. Thompson

If you hear something bad about a person, and you know them, would you be judgmental?

If I knew them, I’d ask them about the issue. There are two sides to every story. It makes sense that you should hear both sides before becoming judgmental.

Why are so many people suddenly calling me a “troll?” Do they realize it hurts my feelings and makes me sad?

If you’re not a troll, what do so many people call you that? And, if you’re not a troll, what do you care? People are being wrongfully judgmental, so ignore them. Listen to the people that make you happy.

Do you think it is more important to be happy or useful?

It is more important to be happy, and being useful makes me truly happy.

Is integrity still held in high regard, or has it been disregarded?

If you don’t have integrity, what’s the point of life? If you aren’t being honest and have strong moral principles for your life, you are something the cat dragged in. Integrity in life is necessary, to be held in good regard.

Why do people always mention the good things they did to them whenever you wrong them?

I’ve never wronged anyone, not even my ex-wife, though she would balk. I just don’t in me do “wrong them.”

What role do social expectations play in our tendency to dwell on negative emotions? Do societal pressures make it harder to remain positive, especially when we do not meet certain standards?

Social expectations? My emotions don’t dwell around “social expectations.” My emotions are what they are, and I will be the first to voice them. I will “remain positive” as I voice my opinions. We tend to hold our emotions back due to “societal expectations.” No one knows what we really feel, and this causes confusion. Everyone we know needs to know what is going on. If your wife is a whore, so be it. If the husband is a cad, they need to know about him. My wife bad-mouthed me, and everyone knew it was wrong. The fact that everyone knew she was full of it, made me feel much better.  That she became the pariah, caused me to, ultimately, forgive her, many years ago. I became happier, and a more understanding person as I moved on. 

"I do not shy away from accepting that I had a troubled past, but in the journey of coming out of that dark phase, I understand humans better. I am less judgmental and more compassionate. I learned empathy and forgiveness, and that gives me confidence as a person."

-- Amit Sadh

How do some people stay happy all the time?

Strive to be truly happy always, and in all things, regardless of your circumstances. It is a choice we should all make.

Why do people act like they were born yesterday? Past is prologue.

Not all people act like this. I am 71, and I can tell you I was not born yesterday. I have had a very eventful life, and I have learned much. The past is the past. It is what it is. But, the future… is the next great adventure. I can’t wait!

What is a good alternative to "Don't judge a book by its cover"?

Maybe you should read a couple of chapters… before you judge. 

In this insincere experience of living, there are purposes. One of these purposes is training. One day the training period will be completed. What have you, the reader, determined is the training you are being given? What purpose does that serve?

Living is not an insincere experience. The purpose of life is learning. During training, we are learning. The training may be complete, but the learning will continue. Again, learning is the purpose of life. Make certain you study what you are supposed to learn. During your next life, and every life after that, there will be more learning. It is what we were designed for.

Why do people not like success?

What people are you talking about? I get a kick out of success. Not everybody fits into your definition.

To achieve success in life, what must be done first?

Succeed. Is this another trick question?

"Success is no accident. It is hard work, perseverance, learning, studying, sacrifice, and most of all, love of what you are doing or learning to do"

-- Pelé

How can science be used to disprove the existence of a deity?

If you can use science to prove the existence of a deity, there will be a need to disprove it. Currently, it is a belief taken on faith. Atheists, nor theists, can prove the existence or non-existence of a deity. Both have a “belief” and think they are right. The only proof is to die and find out. Any takers?

Why are Western Europeans so smug? Do they do it on purpose, or is it a result of educational conditioning?

I was stationed in Western Europe, and I found the people to be very cordial and personable.

Why are some people always so happy?

It is a choice. You can be saddled with drama, or you can laugh it off and carry on with life. Drama is an emotion you can work through and come out the other side as you go in - happy. Again, you can be miserable or strive to be truly happy, always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances. This is why some people, like me, are so happy always. Let’s call it a curse, being so happy, always.

How do you define a complete person?

Everything works, without assistance. Vitamin supplements are assistance, as are eyeglasses.

What questions can help us think beyond the immediate problem?

What will the “immediate problem” cause in the future? Maybe the problem is not immediate. Maybe, the problem is in the future, and the future problem can be neutralized. That will make the current problem, not a problem.

Where does desire lead you?

Into trouble.

“Do not spoil what you have by desiring what you have not; remember that what you now have was once among the things you only hoped for.”

-- Epicurus

Money makes a woman happy, but what makes a man happy?

Sex. 

What prevents you from forgiving women?

When they don’t take responsibility for their, very wrong, actions.

Why do bad things often come to good people?

Balance.

Does humanity have a goal?

Learning.

What is your belief about the purpose or meaning of life? If you do not believe in a purpose or meaning, what is your reasoning behind this belief?

The purpose of life is to learn. Everything else supports the prime directive - to learn.

Is it enough for a person to be honest in order to be a good person?

If they aren’t honest, then they aren’t a good person.

“It's discouraging to think how many people are shocked by honesty and how few by deceit.”

-- Noël Coward

Is it bad to have sex with someone you don't love?

Yes, but it may cost.

Why does everyone tell me, “F#%k off”?

You rub everybody the wrong way. How about not aggravating people?

Is it easier to fall in love or to stay in love?

It is much easier to fall in love than to stay in love. Staying in love takes focus and work. I fall in love every day.

Do I need details of someone, right now?

Why? If you can’t answer this question, you don’t need it.

Can love damage human life?

It does damage every day, usually to one’s heart.

“We accept the love we think we deserve.”

-- Stephen Chbosky

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Para What? (Reprinted and updated from 11/1/2015)

"I speak my mind because it hurts to bite my tongue.

The worth of a book is measured by what you carry away from it.

It's not over till it's over.

Imagination is everything.

All life is an experiment.

What the caterpillar calls the end of the world, the master calls the butterfly."

-- Pat Frayne 

I going to make this article short.

Many will probably be happy not to subject themselves to the tedium of the lengthy thoughts, that constantly plague me.  For these folks, I can only say... now you know how I feel.  For the rest of you who look forward to my thoughts, or enjoy reading them, well, I'm always happy to have you along on my path, though I question your sanity for doing so.  I'm not sure if following me would evidence a masochistic tilt or a search for faith. 

I had a month of precognitive experiences, which culminated in a prize drawing at a Halloween party one night.  Every time we would buy a specific beer, at the Cigar bar, we would get a ticket for the prize drawing.  This contest has been going on for months.  I made the comment when I bought my first beer for this, that one ticket is all I would need to win.  As it turned out, many beers later, I required two tickets to win two of the prizes.  As unsurprising as this was for me, the fact that one of the prizes was an expensive bike did surprise me.  I had just started looking for a bike the other day.

This follows my Monday thought that I needed to "get out of the house" and do something with my time. This was followed by a phone call from a friend asking me to lead the chaplaincy at one of the local Medical Centers.

Now, one might think, this would be the time to consider winning a million bucks.  But, what would I do with a million dollars?  If God wanted me to win that kind of money, He already knows I would put it to good use in some sustainable charitable contribution to the local community.  I might even be able to get the thought for a "Center for Tolerance" out of my head, and onto the drawing board.

Man has abilities that lie dormant within us.  As we entered this new century, where technology takes over much of our lives, we experienced fewer anomalies.  How sad it is that we have forgotten the "gifts" bestowed on us from on high.  How sad, that these random experiences have become "humorous anecdotes" instead of cherished abilities.  How different our world might be, if we pay attention to being "spiritually" more than we are.

Just my short thought.

“Occult’ may perhaps sound somewhat sinister in the ears of some modern readers, but its original meaning is not connected to black magic or any other evil; the word is derived from the Latin occultus, meaning ‘secret’ or ‘hidden’, and is a neutral term for phenomena that are obscure to us. For example, Isaac Newton, who first formulated the law of gravitation, describes gravity as having ‘occult’ qualities, as it cannot be seen and it exerts its power at a distance and in a secret way.”

-- Terje Simonsen

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Decisions, Growth, Love, Existence, God, and Faith

 

“No man ever steps in the same river twice, for it's not the same river and he's not the same man.”

-- Heraclitus

What is a major decision you've made changed the course of your life? How did it change your journey?

I was drafted, so I joined the Air Force. I did it without a job guarantee. I had a college Psychology major, so they offered me “Intelligence.” It definitely changed everything. I stayed for 23 years. When I got out I went to work for an Institutional Review Board, because the VP wanted a person who wouldn’t lie to him. I stayed there for another 17 years. So I went from psychology to Intelligence to an IRB. 42 years of my life in the service of my country. Who knew it would turn out so well?

Does writing a journal make you mature?

If your mind can’t remember stuff… unless you write it down. What do you think?

How would you process the end of your life if you had few days left to live and how would you do this if you spent your whole life with no support system, almost isolated?

It is the end of my life, so what process would you like me to waste time on? If I had no “support system” then I was my support. If I am isolated, then I’m probably going to die alone. If I’m the intelligent person I know I am, I know I’m supposed to learn from this… and I would. The next life will present more possibilities that I will take advantage of, not like this life.

What makes you thankful for the time you have left on this planet?

The people I have met and the opportunities I have created for myself.

Why do you think you’re unique and gifted?

I’m not “gifted” the way I see it. I am as unique as the next person. I created my own “luck” in life, with some help from my parents. You may be “unique and gifted” but it takes friends and associates to make your life worth living. If you cut yourself off from everyone else, who are you?

What makes you feel bored?

When I don’t fill my time with creativity. I like to cook, so when I feel bored…

"Creativity is seeing what others see and thinking what no one else ever thought."

-- Albert Einstein

How does accountability strengthen your personal growth?

“Accountability” means I have recognized where I have failed. For me, this means I need to go back and see where the problem was. I learn from the issue. If I learn from the issue, I have personal growth.

Why do people sometimes feel compelled to apologize even when it's unnecessary?

Unfortunately, yes.

Is there a conflict between God and Satan, or do they collaborate to test humanity's faith?

There is no conflict between God and Satan. God recognized that the universe He created needed balance. When Satan stepped out of line, he was assigned Hell as his punishment. In Hell, he can tempt all he wants. Those who buy into the temptation can find their reward in Hell. They collaborate.

Why do liberal men think women don't want love or relationships?

Uh… the men are liberal. God help the children the women are talked into murdering.

How well do you know yourself compared to knowing who you want to be, and what others want you to be?

The decision to be a psychologist was my moment in the sun. I was drafted into the Army, so I joined the Air Force. I always knew myself, and Intelligence allowed me to know myself better. People tried to talk me out of my reenlisting, but I knew where I needed to be. 23 years later, I retired and started another career with a business that helped people in need. What others wanted from me had no bearing on what I wanted. 25 years into my marriage I divorced my “wife.” 40 years into my professional life, I retired with a smile on my face. Knowing who you want to be is so much more important than what others want you to be.

How do you respond when someone says they don't know what to make of you?

“Nobody does. Can I buy you a drink?”

“No one knows what you have been through or what your pretty little eyes have seen, but I can reassure you... whatever you have conquered, it shines through your mind.”

-- Nikki Rowe

Is it wrong to love someone?

Absolutely, not.

When should you care about something?

When it affects you. If someone shoots a dog, I will be right up in their face. That goes for most people, and cats, as well. You can’t think your anti-social behavior won’t get a response. It will, and it will be from me… if I witness it.

Will this day be forgotten in 20 years?

If I’m dead, then yes.

What are some ways to forgive someone?

If they are acting stupid, you can shake your head and forgive them for acting stupid. Or, if they recognize their “faux pas” and ask forgiveness for their misstep.

How did your partner explain why he/she cheated on you?

She had no excuses, She admitted it all. I divorced her, after 25 years of marriage. 

Can a person be completely ignorant? How can one determine if someone is completely ignorant?

Because they act completely ignorant. “Judging” ignorance is up to the person witnessing the ignorance. Some people might think they weren’t thinking, and others might think they were totally ignorant with no excuse.

“Nothing in the world is more dangerous than sincere ignorance and conscientious stupidity.”

-- Martin Luther King Jr.

What are reasons people might believe there is a purpose for human existence?

God did not want to admit He failed. Ta-da! Here we are!

Do you agree that being able to find moments of enrichment and reasons for gratitude each day indicates that we are on a path that is right for us?

No. We found moments of enrichment and gratitude. Let’s not go overboard thinking this indicates the right path for us.

Have you peed in a park?

Hasn’t everybody?

What are some ways that lack of awareness can lead to suffering?

People have not thought through to “awareness” that, what they’re doing, will lead to suffering.

Do you need help with anything?

Nope. I have all the help I need.

What are some benefits of being an atheist, sort, and long-term?

Short-term, you don’t need to believe in a deity. Long-term, if you continue to not believe in a deity, when you die that will be it. Which is exactly what you, probably, believe. The rest of us, however, might be able to enjoy life after death… hopefully.

"Scientific views end in awe and mystery, lost at the edge in uncertainty, but they appear to be so deep and so impressive that the theory that it is all arranged as a stage for God to watch man's struggle for good and evil seems inadequate."

-- Richard P. Feynman

What are some ways people can experience God?

Get out of the city. There is no better evidence than experiencing nature... or birth.

What are the reasons and motives that lead to marital infidelity?

She was trying to look for something better, which she should have done before agreeing to a marriage, and had two kids.

In dating someone for almost 3 months, is it okay to ask what things he likes and dislikes about me?

It makes very good sense to get a good idea of what he thinks of you. 

What does it mean when people say "don't get too woke" about important issues? Is being "woke" a positive thing?

No, and if it ever becomes a “positive thing” I will join the revolution to nix it. “Woke,” as the liberal minority believes, is not a “positive” thing.

What are some benefits of believing in God?

A life after death would be a big thing. I would hate not to believe, and just die.

Have you ever seen a ghost or thought maybe you did?

Yes, but then, I’m a paranormal investigator. I had one experience where I asked a “special needs” girl, who died before the Civil War, to stand in front of the camera so I could take a photograph of her. Dumb me, not realizing she would be right in front of the lens. Everything was sharp, except it looked like I took the photo through white smoke.

“Ghosts are all around us. Look for them, and you will find them.”

-- Ruskin Bond

How do atheists acquire knowledge without faith?

In the same way, theists acquire knowlege. Knowledge has nothing to do with faith unless you are discussing religion.

Is a belief in god or a higher power necessary for a better life?

No. It is necessary for a better afterlife.

Can the atheists on this platform go two days without attacking God?

Probably not. It makes so little sense, though. Neither side, atheist or theist, has any proof to offer, to back up their argument. But, they keep going after each other, even with no proof. I wish they would just shut up about it. It would keep me out of the argument. 

Is belief in God based on faith or common sense?

Faith. 

What is more intelligent, emotional intelligence or rational intelligence?

Rational intelligence. If you let “emotion” get in the mix, you could be wrong. “Rational” intelligence might be wrong, but not as much as emotional intelligence would probably be. Personally, I’d rather put my money on facts, than rely on my emotions or my rational opinions. Just saying.

How can the spiritual world be proven?

Die. Kind of a "one-off" proof.

“The more you allow yourself to be ruled by negativity, the harder it is for you to walk on the spiritual path.”

-- Khorshed Bhavnagri

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Statements, Savior, Names, Love, Gold, and the End

 

“Before I got married I had six theories about raising children; now, I have six children and no theories.”

-- John Wilmot

People think I always give everything to others without leaving anything for myself. I always save the best for last and that is, or would be, the masterpiece of my life, a book titled "Zen and The Art of War"? I WOULD DEDICATE IT TO MY FATHER.

Is there a real question in this, or is it a statement about your father?

My wife cheated on me more than 10 times with different people. I divorced her and now she wants to come back. Should I give her another chance?

Are you an idiot?

Should you stay with a person who won't marry you?

Why? Do they have a good reason? My ex-wife screwed me over. That is my reason.

If war came tomorrow, what would you do today?

Make love until tomorrow.

What are some things most people take for granted?

Toilet paper.

How do I stop trusting people easily?

Get screwed by them. It is the easiest way.

“The best way to find out if you can trust somebody is to trust them.”

-- Ernest Hemingway

I am your Lord and Savior. Are you going to be humble and bow to me or do you wish to get humbled and take the Almighty shaft?

Well, this isn’t believable.

What causes someone to feel that the world is so confusing, walk around in circles, suffer from overthinking, overlap of ideas, inability to think clearly, talk to himself, or move his lips while thinking? What are the best solutions for it?

This is the norm in the military. In Intelligence I suffered through this for 23 years. I sustained some more, for the next 17 years, in the civilian sector. When I retired, it all went away. Funny how that works.

If you think you overheard something bad but are unsure if you heard it correctly.  Should you let it go?

No, you should make sure you heard it correctly. 

How often can a person survive in this world by being a decent and compassionate person?

So, is being a decent and compassionate person, is not a “go-to” thing? I have survived for 70 years by doing this, and it has been a pleasure… regardless of what my ex-wife might say.

What is the most important decision in a relationship?

Honesty. 

What do you think normality is?

It is different for all people. What is normal for you isn’t normal for me. My “normal” is to get up, and take a mile walk at 3:00 in the morning. Not “normal” for everybody. I can’t remember when I was last mad. Probably, with my ex-wife back in the late 90s. “Normality” depends on the person, and can change throughout life.

"We have normality. I repeat, we have normality. Anything you still can't cope with is therefore your own problem."

-- Douglas Adams

How do you feel when people you are close to, call you bad names that you are not?

It is a sign that I need new people to be close to me. If people call me bad names that I’m not, there is something wrong with the people I hang with.

Would you want to be yourself the way you really are or the “reputation way”?

Interesting. My reputation is who I really am. To be someone else, that would be a joke.

What are the examples of positive thinking?

I can do it, even though I have tried 31 iterations, I haven’t failed. It may take me more iterations before I get it right. It will take 32… or more. The point is, I will not fail. The past iterations were part of my “learning” process. Learning is what we do in life. As long as you are learning, you have not failed. 

Why do I go through a lot in life? Can someone give an answer?

Learning. It is why we’re here, to learn.

What are three signs that your life is crying for help?

Emotion, depression, and substance abuse. These are three of a larger group of signs indicating that you may need help.

Why does the cheater who got caught in bed still deny that they’ve cheated and blame their unsuspecting partner for why they cheated? Even after the primary relationship has ended from the betrayal, they still deny it!

They have a problem owning up to their infidelity. They were caught, and they will deny it until they die. They blame the other culprit, who will give you the real story. If the “primary relationship” has ended, they are willing to destroy their life, for fun and frolic. They are a mess, and their primary relationship is better without them.

Author comment: He is no longer in my life. I forced no contact, which he fought me on. He wanted to stay friends, at the very least. Not a chance. He destroyed any foundation we had by doing what he did.

“Humans have a tendency to look for things in the places where it is easiest to search for them rather than in the places where the truth is more likely to be found.”

-- Esther Perel

Is love between people a real feeling, or is it just a system people follow?

If you have ever felt true love, you’ll know the answer to this question.

What is there that is worthwhile to care about? Why should I care about it? You are aware that everything in life is a lie.

“Life” is a classroom where you are supposed to learn. The fact that you think “everything” is a lie, shows you have not learned anything. But, wait… you have learned to speak, type, and think (albeit wrong). So, you have really done what life has meant you to do. You have learned. The fact that you question life, shows that you have learned… something worthwhile. We are here to learn, and everything else in life is superfluous to the prime objective.

Is it worse to be biased or insipid?

Insipid.

How can you tell if something is not right, or, if something seems off?

23 years in military Intelligence has taught me this. It helps if you are part of the program, but if something smells, you learn to get a whiff of it. Car dealers are the worst for making me think that something is off. A deal today is a deal tomorrow. They will balk, but they will deal. The same goes for life. You need to learn what is right, or if something is off. 

What do I say when someone thinks their opinion/words are worthless, and that they will not change anything? Thus, they believe it’s useless to try doing something. Why do they think like that?

Because they will not try, the “fault” will be pushed on others. This is their “worthless” thinking.

Can it be true that someday, you will look back and know exactly why it had to happen?

At 70 years of age, I don’t have to wait for “someday” to know why it had to happen. At my age, it is what it is, and it will usually bite you in the ass. If you don’t learn your lessons by 70 you are sleeping at the wheel.

"You cannot control what happens to you, but you can control your attitude toward what happens to you, and in that, you will be mastering change rather than allowing it to master you."

-- Brian Tracy

If gold is money, what backs gold? Can you eat gold like a tomato potato taco burger or $5 Costco chicken or a Mcdonald's $5 Big Mac, make your car run like gas, or live in a gold house in NYC New York City?

Nothing backs gold. Gold backs everything else. Everything you have listed can be bought by gold or paper backed by gold. Gold makes the world work.

Why do people say, “Everything falls into place eventually”, when nothing has even started? Why do I get such things?

Shitty luck.

What makes you think you own my life?

Because you can do with your life as you choose. It is your choice. If someone else has the power of your choice, you must have given it to them. If you haven’t, then your life is for you to do as you wish. Every person is free do to as they wish.

Is fear an illusion? If so, why do we experience it? How can we overcome our fears?

It isn’t an illusion and you don’t want to “overcome” fear. Fear keeps you alive.

What do you say is the cause of life struggles?

Learning. Life is all about learning. What we go through teaches us to survive. Many people don’t see the point of learning. Maybe they will be reborn, maybe not, but they are here for a reason, and the reason is to learn. If you are reborn with all you have learned, you can learn new things and not repeat this life. It is a choice.

What’s something you believe is true that most people don’t?

God.

"Sir, my concern is not whether God is on our side; my greatest concern is to be on God's side, for God is always right."

-- Abraham Lincoln

Is it wrong to want the world to end?

It will, but not in your lifetime.

Is there a correlation between intelligence and wisdom? Can someone be both highly intelligent and wise? How does one acquire wisdom?

There is no “correlation” between intelligence, street smarts, or a child that learns. Wisdom comes from learning. Learning is the prime directive for all sentient life on Earth. We are programmed to learn. Those who choose not to learn are left at the bus stop. Learn or not, it is a choice we all have to make. What you do with what you learn, can be wisdom. Many intelligent people are wisdom stupid.

How should I punish my spouse who has been cheating on me for 10 years?

Divorce her/him.

Do you cherish your freedom?

I volunteered for 23 years of my life, to help secure continued freedom for my country. Freedom is the only thing that is free… and priceless.

Reader comment: Thank you for your service.

My reply: It was my sincere pleasure to volunteer a bit of my life to my country. 

In the pursuit of excellence, what sacrifices are you willing to make today to secure your vision for tomorrow?

Voting. Keep the country out of the hands of incompetence.

Do you always remember to live life?

Every morning when I wake, I give thanks for another day in paradise. One needs to strive for true happiness, always and in all things, regardless of circumstances. It is a choice we should all make. If you don’t live life, what’s the point… other than learning?

"If you set your goals ridiculously high and it's a failure, you will fail above everyone else's success."

-- James Cameron

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Belief, Atheism, Emotions, Life, and Losers

“The thoughts in our minds are not facts.”

-- Joseph Nguyen

Do you think that people should believe everything they think?

What I’m thinking now, is dicey. Believing everything you “think” is dangerous. It can be a waste of time better spent researching facts.

Can you describe your life, with one word?

Learning.

What is the evidence that there is no god?

Where is the evidence that there is a God? Theists and atheists both have the same problem - proof. Neither side has any concrete proof to back up their argument. We will find out the truth when we die… or, maybe not. We may just be dead.

Why do cowards block responses?

What about “cowards” do you not understand?

What is the concept of purpose and direction in life? Why do some people believe in it?

The purpose of life is to learn. This is the direction we should all take. Everything else we do in life supports our prime directive - to learn. When we die, what we have learned will be evaluated. Then, we will be sent on another assignment… to learn more.

Would anything ever change in life if everyone had the same opinions? Why or why not?

If everybody had the same opinion, and the opinion required a change, then, there would be a change due to the requirement of the opinion.

“Life is a series of natural and spontaneous changes. Don't resist them; that only creates sorrow. Let reality be reality. Let things flow naturally forward in whatever way they like.”

-- Lao Tzu

Can the atheists on this platform go 30 minutes without attacking Christians?

Probably not.

I'm an atheist who believes in God. What should I do?

First, look up “atheist” in the dictionary. If you believe in God, you’re a theist. Once you define who you really are, you can start living a real life. I believe in God, but my definition of “God” differs significantly from most others. My definition works for me, and it keeps me a theist.

What should I do if my wife isn't even touching me anymore?

Divorce comes to mind. The bigger question is, who is she touching?

Is life really worth it? 

Is death? Life continues on, whereas death… well, it is permanent nothing, depending on how good you’ve been. If you’re asking if life is really worth it, maybe you should do some introspection. Life is so much more than permanent death. But, if you live life to its fullest, are selfless, and always good, the chances of you moving forward are great.

Why do I pray to God but he doesn't help me?

It isn’t God’s responsibility to help you. You pray to God for the strength to help yourself.

I don't want to live. I feel like such a failure. What should I do?

Live, and change your lifestyle, so you can start not thinking of yourself as a failure. Our purpose on the plane of existence is to learn. Instead of learning, you see failure as the “end all.” Get back in the boat. Learn from your failure. Change your tactic. If it seems impossible, put it aside for another day, and move on. Life is all about learning lessons presented to you.

"Don't be pushed around by the fears in your mind. Be led by the dreams in your heart... Instead of worrying about what you cannot control, shift your energy to what you can create."

-- Roy T. Bennett

What is the alternative to believing in God according to atheists?

Not believing in God. Is this a trick question?

If I say "the idiot", who comes to mind first?

I must have surrounded myself with great people. I have no “idiots” to mention. There might be a few “ignorant” people around me, but I can’t think of one that is an idiot. 

How are you aging on your own terms?

Very well, thank you very much. 

Are sarcastic people more likely to be introverted?

I try not to be sarcastic, and it is quite a task. I am certainly not introverted, though. Sarcasm, as I understand it, comes from our need to be humorous, whether we know we do it, or not.

What is the outcome for those who overestimate their abilities and underestimate the ability of others?

A significant loss.

I woke up inside a wooden cabin, full of air on the surface of Pluto. I am being kept warm by the cabin's fire chimney, and have four logs of wood left. I have to wait for humans to rescue me. How do I survive?

You don’t. The atmosphere on Pluto has already killed you. The cabin, fire, and logs were a split-second wish you had before you died. How you got there is a mystery, but if you’re waiting for humans to come and get your corpse… it will be quite a while.

“A thing is not necessarily true because a man dies for it.”

-- Oscar Wilde

Why do people think their emotions are more important than their ability to reason?

They aren’t thinking. Emotions are in the way of their ability to reason.

What can we do about the fact that all "higher education" is really about is advanced training in lying and stealing? Doesn't that help to explain why the world is such a mess? All our professionals really know how to do, is lie and steal.

You have confused “higher education” with a desire to lie and steal. Not all “professionals” lie and steal. 

How can one partner move on when the other absolutely refuses to let go?

One partner has common sense, and the other is thick.

As you've gotten older, do you regret getting tattoos, and do you warn young people of your regrets?

I had no tattoos when I joined the Air Force. When I took the job with Intelligence, we were prohibited from getting tattoos for good reason. When I left the service I never considered scarring my body with art. I hate needles.  I don’t warn others, because what you do to your body is up to you.

What was the most satisfying display of instant karma you have ever seen?

A enemy sniper, that had quite a list of kills, was taken out by a friendly sniper. Waiting...

Should you fix yourself before fixing others?

When I hear this question I recall airline safety briefings. The flight attendant says: “Put your air mask on before you assist other passengers.” The reason? Two dead people are much worse than one, and I agree with them. Save yourself, before you think about saving others. It is hard to help if you are dying.

Reader comment: It’s funny you mention that. I just finished reading The Last Lecture by Randy Pausch. In Chapter 60, Randy writes this about caregiving/taking care of others: 

"For starters, we both try to remember that some of the best caregiving advice we’ve ever heard comes from flight attendants: "Put on your own oxygen mask before assisting others." It can’t be argued against - two dead people is a worse outcome than one dead person.

“Always choose yourself first. Women are very socialized to choose other people. If you put yourself first, it’s this incredible path you can forge for yourself.”

-- Rebecca Traister

How do I gain a life when my circumstances keep bringing me back down to nothing?

You need to rise above your circumstances. Strive to be truly happy always, and in all things, regardless of your circumstances. If you are truly happy, then, where you are in life, makes little matter. If it makes little matter, then rise above where you are. It is a choice we all need to make to rise above nothing.

Why don't people just give others the benefit of the doubt, if there's is no trouble in public, or simply respect their space instead of judging them, discriminating against them, even when they are empty allegations, when they did nothing wrong?

Some people love drama and will stir it up whenever they can, “empty allegations” or not.

Can it be true that you should be a reflection of what you’d like to receive?

Always be a reflection of what you’d like to receive, even though you probably won’t be receiving it. Of course, being truly happy all the time helps. Being truly happy throws people off, especially if you do it always and regardless of your circumstances. You are rich beyond your dreams of avarice, even though you might be poor. It is a choice we should all make to be continuously happy.

I’m 28, with no money, and incredibly depressed living at home with my parents in a very remote/southern town. I want to give up. How do I overcome this?

Get a roommate… or two, a job, and an inexpensive apartment. Other than that, get married.

Can you be smart/intelligent but still evil and selfish? People usually say that smart people are often good and have more morals, but is it possible to be smart and lack morals/concern for others?

Of course. It is your choice to do with your smarts or intelligence, what you will. Of course, karma will hunt you down and punish you for being evil, selfish, and lacking morals and concern for others. Again, it is your choice.

What was one experience in your life that hardened you as a person?

I joined the military. It hardened my scattered beliefs into a simple belief in doing what is right, regardless of the circumstances.

"Boot camp was the first time I got a heavy dose of discipline. It was the best thing that ever happened to me."

-- Nelsan Ellis

How do I stop being a morning loser?

Start waking up at noon. Or, you can try not being a loser. What you are is what you decide to be. You can blame what you are on anything, but it all comes back to you, and what you want to be. It is your choice.

Sometimes, people who want more than they can handle, end up losing everything, altogether. Will greed and selfishness get people anywhere in life?

Not if karma is paying attention.

How do you test the concept of a "higher being," when nothing, in science, supports it?

So, you listen to science? Someone has to... I suppose. A “higher being” is a belief most theists have. They have faith in their belief that “something” must have created everything. I think it is a higher power, while most people think it is a higher being. A pound of feathers or a pound of lead, all equals a pound. It is a matter of faith and what you believe, when it comes to the concept. Testing is out the window.

Is atheism just about being contrarian?

Only if atheists think about being contrarian. Most atheists believe that God doesn’t exist.

What is the purpose of life, if there is no God and if no faith-based religions exist?

Regardless of “God” and “faith-based religious” existence, the “purpose of life” is to learn. From “cradle to grave” we are to learn… everything we can. The more we learn, the farther we progress in our next lives.

Why do the people you respect and love the most, betray you?

It only happened with my ex-wife. If it happened to you, find better people to love and respect. I did.

“Here is where couples often run into trouble as they try to work out their problems, even small ones. Women confront to connect. The typical response from a man, however, is that he thinks his wife is confronting to control. If another man talked to this man like that, he would sound intentionally provocative. Is that not why some men feel their wives are picking a fight?”

-- Emerson Eggerichs

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com