Questioning Love, Respect, Caring, Happiness, and Unrequited

 

“I meant it when I said I didn’t believe in love at first sight. It takes time to really, truly fall for someone. Yet I believe in a moment. A moment when you glimpse the truth within someone, and they glimpse the truth within you. In that moment, you don’t belong to yourself any longer, not completely. Part of you belongs to him; part of him belongs to you. After that, you can’t take it back, no matter how much you want to, no matter how hard you try.”

-- Claudia Gray

I just met this guy today. Now he is telling me that he loves me. Does he really love me?

He’s more in “lust” with you than in love. He probably wants to screw your brains out. Okay… that was a bit off-color, but you get the idea.

What was the most challenging thing you have ever done?

Resistance training with the Royal Navy.

What should I do if I love my boyfriend but don’t like his family?

Who do you have a relationship with, your boyfriend or his family? The family is the boyfriend’s issue, not yours.

I want my girlfriend to break up with me, what do I do?

Tell her. Honesty is always best, even if it’s uncomfortable.

I’m lowkey ugly. Why does this girl still love me?

How’s your package hangin? Maybe she loves the “pipe” more than the man it’s attached to. Just sayin. And I’m assuming that you’re a man. If you're not, maybe she loves something else. Or, maybe she's into "lowkey ugly" people. You should ask her.

My wife cheated on me with a doctor she works with. What can I do?

Divorce. That’ll teach her. Have you wondered, who else she’s been with?

“I told my wife the truth. I told her I was seeing a psychiatrist. Then she told me the truth: that she was seeing a psychiatrist, two plumbers, and a bartender.”

-- Rodney Dangerfield

Can much love and no respect be applied to the same thing?

No. You must love someone you can be true friends with. If you are true friends, there is much respect. And, true love does not exist if there is no respect for the one you love.

How can I find an honest man in my life?

Do you go to church?

What are some reasons why men may leave a woman they love? Can anything be done to prevent this from happening?

You assume the men truly love them. If they did, they wouldn’t leave them. It either happens now or it happens later, but it will happen if they don’t truly love them.

Did you want to hook up?

To what?

Regarding men who may have a preference for large breasts, can this interfere with a relationship with women with smaller attributes? Do men only 'love' women who are of a physical type?

Some men are attracted to a physical type. Some men, like me, are attracted to women who are attracted to them. Some of us just want to have fun.

Can you explain the concept of "cause-and-effect" according to Buddhism?

Try this:

“Buddhism teaches that the law of cause and effect underlies the workings of all phenomena. Positive thoughts, words and actions create positive effects in the lives of individuals, leading to happiness. Negative thoughts, words and actions on the other hand—those that in some way undermine the dignity of life—lead to unhappiness. This is the general principle of karma.”

-- from “Soka Gakkai”

Do you really care what people say or think about you?

Not particularly. I am what I am, so take me or leave me. I don’t care. 

Is it true that if you don’t care about yourself no one can?

If you don’t care about yourself, how do you believe anyone else can? The saying isn’t totally true, since people can care about those who don’t think anyone could. First responders, doctors, nurses, and some people on the street would come to your aid without caring what you think of yourself. It is true that some care whether you do or not.

Is it possible for a human to be as strong as a silverback gorilla?

No. Gorillas are one reason we bring equalizers into the jungle. High-powered rifles… just in case.

Why are most English people satisfied with failure?

Failure is the best way we can learn. It isn’t the failure, per se, it is what you do with the failure that can satisfy a person’s need for learning. When you fail, you critique what you did to find out why you failed, and then you try, try, and try again until you attain the goal you are after. Most people are satisfied with failure because they can learn from it.

How do you feel wearing nothing?

Naked.

Why do unattractive men assume that a pretty woman, like me, wants them?

I never assume, especially with a “pretty” woman who has an attitude about unattractive men wanting her. The attitude alone would be enough to turn me off. I’m an average guy who has always looked for an average woman. I leave the games for other people.

“A session of boasting won't attract any real friends. It will set you up on a pedestal, however, making you a clearer target.”

-- Richelle E. Goodrich

Do you really care what people have to say?

Absolutely. It is the only way I can determine their intelligence.

Is it possible that people who claim they don't believe in true love simply haven't found the right person yet?

I don’t think they even know what true love is any more than they know what true happiness is. They fall in love as easily as they fall into happiness. They fall out of both in the same way. They think love and happiness are a switch they have a modicum of control over. True love and true happiness have no switch. When you realize this, you have discovered some wisdom.

Why do people try so hard to seek my approval and respect?

I’m not, so rest easy.

How do people move on from someone they have loved for years?

When they have screwed their lights out with several people, you either move on or become submissive to their liberal sexual appetite. It is a choice.

What inspired you the most today?

Voting.

Am I something out of nothing?

This is not possible. Everything has to have come from something. Even the “Big Bang” had to have something to work from.

“The one who tries to get something for nothing generally winds up getting nothing for something.”

-- Napoleon Hill

How can I be happy in my relationship?

If you have to question your happiness, you are with the wrong person.

What are the reasons behind missing our exes and wanting them back in our lives?

You’re kidding, right? Not on a bet! I miss my ex, but I sure don’t want her back, screwing up my life again. I’ve been truly happy for the 23 years we’ve been divorced, and I plan to be truly happy until I die. I am perfectly happy without her screwing up my life, thank you very much.

Why are people dumber as a whole more than individually?

Their stupidity is more obvious as a whole than individually. Take voters, for instance.

Does missing an ex-partner indicate that the relationship is worth rekindling?

They are an “ex” partner for a reason. Focus on that reason and ask the question again. Do you really feel like putting yourself through all that, again? Life is much too short to endure that kind of drama again. Better to find a better partner.

How would you describe a person who has achieved a lot but remains humble?

A “humble achiever” should cover it.

How do you deal with people who twist your words?

I try not to talk to them. If they constantly twist your words, what’s the point of talking to them? Don’t “deal” with them, ignore them. They are not worth the time you waste on them.

“Twist a tongue, and tongue a twist how many twists can a tongue twister twist around their twisting tongue. If a tongue twister's tongue could twist, how many twists would the tongue twister's tongue twist while their tongue was a twisting.”

-- Jazz Feylynn

What are some quotes about loving someone who doesn't love you back?

“Because, if you could love someone, and keep loving them, without being loved back . . . then that love had to be real. It hurt too much to be anything else.” ― Sarah Cross

Why do we believe everything we’re told without question?

If you believe everything you’re told, you’re not that intelligent. This is how we got Joe Biden as President. You need to question everything, or, you can just cut the red wire and pray that you won’t blow up. Questions help to keep us alive, I don’t go skydiving because I don’t pack the parachute. If I packed the parachute I still wouldn’t have gone skydiving, because I don’t trust myself. If I don’t trust myself, why would I trust some other idiot? Question everything, even yourself.

How do I cope with the fear of not existing after death?

Don’t be an atheist.

Is it possible to find genuine love in today's world? What are the qualities that contribute to a lasting and genuine love?

Absolutely. Fall in love with your best friend. Don’t fight, discuss. Be understanding and selfless toward each other. And, most of all, be truly happy with your life. If you aren’t happy, your partner won’t be happy.

How can one determine if someone is not very intelligent without causing offense?

Listen to them. You don’t have to say a word, just listen.

How can we be so sure if an afterlife really exists?

Die. However, if you die, you had better be prepared for an afterlife. If you aren’t prepared, you will have died for nothing. Atheists don’t die to find out, they just die. If you are questioning the afterlife, then you must be questioning the existence of God. You probably fall into one of these categories:

“There are four main positions in the argument about whether God exists: atheism (God does not exist), theism (God exists), agnosticism (it is impossible to know whether God exists or not), and skepticism (at the moment we do not know whether God exists or not).”

-- PhilArchive

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com