Questioning Soulmates, Me, Touching, Sex, Activity, and Love

 

“Maybe our girlfriends are our soulmates and guys are just people to have fun with.”

-- Candace Bushnell

Do you believe in soulmates or that people come into your life for a reason?

Yes, it happens to me all the time.

Have you proven to yourself that age is just a number after 70?

I’m 71, and my age is counting down. I feel pretty good, but what I feel and know is quite different. I will start feeling old age shortly. And then, around 90, I will probably go to the next life. I don’t fear it. It is the natural progress of life: Birth, life, death, and rebirth.

Why am I told I am wrong so often when I am being authentic and honest?

So… who is wrong? Being “authentic and honest” is more than the other folks are doing.

Questioner: I am no philosopher, but will reread this a few more times and come back to it. (Feeling kind of out of my depth, yet I was the one who initiated the question!)

My reply: Indeed. 

  Why is forgiveness so hard for some people, and how can it be practiced?

I’m not so sure it is that hard. Forgiveness is the easiest thing we can do. Practice it? Okay... forgive somebody, and then forgive somebody else. If they are wrong, forgive them for being wrong. If they are right, forgive yourself for doubting them. People who don’t practice forgiveness are missing out on the easiest thing we can do.

What is your one golden rule in life?

Honesty. You can be an asshole, but be an honest asshole.

What do I really love?

Search me. I love ice cream, and several women I know. Okay, so that is infatuation. What you really love is up to you, not us. Search your soul and you can find a few things that you really love.

“I wish I knew how to quit you.”

-- Annie Proulx

What does it mean when I like who I am more when I'm not in a relationship?

Relationships are not your cup of tea… yet. When the right person comes along, you will fall over yourself to get close to them. Until then…

What do humans need and long for the most?

Love.

"Animals betray you when they are hungry, and humans betray you when they are satisfied." Do you agree with this saying?

No. It is ignorant. If you are going to betray someone, it is who you are. I have never betrayed anyone, but that’s who I am. Maybe if we’re in a game, but not anything serious. The saying puts people into groups that they may not deserve.

Why am I always tired and angry every day?

You are angry because you are tired. Try to relax. 

To what extent is morality being influenced by money?

If you let your good morality be influenced by money, you are a weak-minded person. Good morality should be on everyone’s mind and be “influenced” by being good.

I am buying a lighter even though I don't smoke, so that if someone smokes, I can hand them a lighter, and I am going to have extra change on me, just in case a homeless person needs change; does this make me a considerate person?

So, you are helping the smoker to die and helping the homeless to live. Make no sense.

Author comment: I want to have what people need, on me, as I expect others to have what I need as well. For me, I would like for people to always have Advil on them in case I don't have it. It's just consideration. The smoking thing ok yeah people aren't supposed to smoke, but I like to know I have what people need/want in that moment.

My reply: Again, you are helping the smoker to die. Makes no sense. 

“The whole business of smoking is like forcing yourself to wear tight shoes just to get the pleasure of taking them off.”

-- Allen Carr

How do you make a girl fall in love with you by touching her?

It depends on where you touch her, for how long, and what your eyes tell her. It is the same "game" we have played for decades. The difference is, do you mean it?

If a person has reasons to be grateful to another person, does this mean that the former person is indebted to the latter person?

To do something that someone would be grateful for is not a reason for the other person to do anything. What was done was selfless. Of course, if you did something to put the other person in debt to you, how selfish would that be?

Can I (a guy) be goofy but at the same time mature?

It is hard to balance the two. Maybe, it is time to grow up. Just sayin.

What does “in the end, you only have yourself” mean?

In the beginning, you also only have yourself. If you rely on anybody but yourself, anytime, you will probably be disappointed. You have a life. It is your life. You can’t rely on anybody to live it for you.

Which Biblical commandments are most essential for salvation?

Every law but, “Remember the Sabbath day, to keep it holy.” I’m not even sure that Sunday is the Sabbath day.

What is the meaning of, "Hold your head high and keep your chin up."?

It makes you a good target. Only dumbasses go into a fight with their "head held high" and their chin up. It is better to be humble until you need to kick ass. It takes people by surprise.

“Carry your head gracefully”

-- Chinonye J. Chidolue

I hate sex. I have no desire to be touched or have sex. What should I do?

Don’t have sex. It isn’t rocket science.

Why is my sister such a twat?

Well, you have a high opinion of your sister. Maybe she is a “twat” because you treat her like one. 

Is it okay to use sex to get what you want?

No.

I’m a 15-year-old guy, who feels like there is nothing to do in life. None of my friends really hang out and all I do is play video games all day. I’m bored but feel like there is nothing to do. I want to do something with my life. Any advice?

Join a gym. Working out keeps your mind and body in good shape. You might find that working out puts muscle where you need it. When you are 18, they might even take you as a trainer.

Why do I have to live in this world?

Which world would you prefer?

Is life only for the living?

Well, the definition of “life” is for those who are living. If you are dead, you aren’t living, but you might be in “transition” to another life. There, you are born and continue on your journey as a living soul. You can continue your trek by learning all that you can in every life.

Reader comment: Can I be both dead and alive?

My reply: No.

Reader reply: Why not, if I believe it strongly enough?

My reply:  Believing in a falsehood will not make it come true. You will die and be reborn. I believe this strongly, but, it doesn’t make it a fact.

"Life is for the living. Death is for the dead. Let life be like music. And death a note unsaid."

-- Langston Hughes 

What activity is happier than playing my favorite computer games?

Fishing and camping in the great outdoors.

Is it bad if you don’t know how to cook at 22?

Is it your fault, or your parents? Good parenting requires dressing the child for appropriate occasions. The other requirement is cooking a meal. My mother made sure I was dressed. I grew up with a Sicilian, and my dad ensured I could cook.

What kind of life do you think is to enjoy life and live the life you want?

I want to be filthy rich.

Can you share a time when you successfully overcame fear? What lessons did you take away from that experience?

Death. Being in Air Force Intelligence, I had to get the classified material from a B-52 that went into a vacant lot. The smells and sights were horrific. You can feel for the families, but you have a job you need to do. I volunteered a couple of more times at crash sites. You need to focus on the job at hand.

Is it possible to have moral principles with amorality? How?

Yes, but it can be confusing. You start to find ways to make amorality a bit more moral.

Why do you work hard for decades yet have nothing but your life to show for it?

Maybe if you stay out of debt, you will have much to show for it. Debt is the killer for having nothing to show for your life. Oh, you will have a lot, but it doesn’t really belong to you. You are in debt. People are in debt from cradle to grave. And when you die, those who loaned all the money come to get what they can.

"Debt gives you the ability to look like you're winning when you're not"

-- Dave Ramsey

Most people will do anything for love, but what won’t you do?

Anything illegal. She will be out, and I’ll be in prison. The thought sucks.

I help a lot to poor people and friends. I do not want a reward in return. Will my life always go sad forever?

If you don’t want a reward, you are a “selfless” helper. As a selfless helper, why is your life sad? Maybe you should get monetarily happy, first, if that will make you happy. Throughout my life, I tried to help people selflessly. It made me very happy to help others. Maybe you need to look at your life and make some adjustments. It is not a good thing if you are not constantly sad.

Why are people good even though they do bad things?

If they do bad things, then they really aren’t good, are they?

Do most men harass women? Why or why not?

I don’t harass women. It isn’t the way I was brought up. Harassing women is a way to never get a quality woman to love you. Not a good end game. I have stepped in, more than once, when a woman was being harassed, and got my clock cleaned. It doesn’t prevent me from stepping up to do the right thing.

What would be the outcome of a world where morality is absent but ethics are present?

“Ethics” would be in great question, where good morality is absent.

Is it bad to be always good?

It depends on what you think is “bad” about always being good. Those who are always good seem to have no problem.

"I've never lived my life in the opinion of others. I believe I'm a good person. I believe I'm a good mom. But that's for my kids to decide, not for the world."

-- Angelina Jolie

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com