Questioning Happy, Future, Manifesting, Death, Success, and Reincarnation

"I don't call it gossip. I call it "emotional speculation."

-- Laurie Colwin

Is it okay not to be happy all the time?

It’s okay, but it isn’t good. I strive to be truly happy always and at all times, regardless of my circumstances. It is my choice.

Can a person live an entire life without telling a lie?

Being a child, I doubt it.

What is the belief that a person can be in so that they succeed in life? I mean spiritual belief.

Believe in yourself. Believing in what you can accomplish is the highest “spiritual” belief you can have, next to believing in God.

Can any law last forever without change?

Have the “Ten Commandments” changed? God handed them down, so the story goes.

Discuss this theory: The purpose of life is to run from depression. From what I've read, this means that over time what always moved people was the opposite of what made them depressed.

The purpose of life is to learn. People have this all screwed up. Everything else in life is to support our learning. If you are learning you have no time to spend on depression.

The purpose of life is to run away from depression. This means that over time what always moved people was the opposite of what made them depressed. Example: Billionaires get depressed if not working constantly. What do you think?

Again, learning is why we live. If you constantly learn you have no time to be depressed. Depression is brought on by yourself. Don’t buy into it. If you think you are going to be depressed, do something that will make you happy. I strive to be truly happy always, and in all things, regardless of my circumstances. It is a choice that everybody needs to make.

Reader comment:  Good answer, Tony. BTW, how did you manage to post two separate answers to the same question?

My answer:  Split personality.

"Education is not preparation for life; education is life itself."

-- John Dewey

Why should I care about the future of the planet, nations, or people, when I won't be here forever? Shouldn't I be selfish while I live? But, life has no fun either. What exactly is the meaning of life?

The meaning of life is to learn. Who told you that you won’t be here forever? We live many lives and learn much. What you are doing is wasting your life. Better that you start to learn.

What's the point of existence if everything is going into the future and what happened now will soon be forgotten?

People. This is the problem with people. No memory.

Why do we have to complicate life? Life is pizza. There is nothing else like an assault on the senses like delicious pizza.

We complicate life. Life is simple. And then, we get involved in it. We can make a can of soup so complicated that it isn’t worth heating up. It is a can of damn soup! Get over it.

How can you tell if you have a fat or skinny mirror?

It is a matter of your point of view.

When it isn't meant to be, is it really the end?

If it isn’t meant to be, then why is it? Everything is, is supposed to be. It isn’t the end, rather, it is a new beginning. What you make of it, is the real question.

Is every narcissist made, or are some narcissists born? Is every narcissist mentally ill, or are some narcissists disabled and not mentally ill?

I’m not touching this question, for fear that I will get shit thrown at me.

“The main condition for the achievement of love is the overcoming of one's narcissism. The narcissistic orientation is one in which one experiences as real only that which exists within oneself, while the phenomena in the outside world have no reality in themselves, but are experienced only from the viewpoint of their being useful or dangerous to one. The opposite pole to narcissism is objectivity; it is the faculty to see other people and things as they are, objectively, and to be able to separate this objective picture from a picture which is formed by one's desires and fears.”

-- Erich Fromm

People always say, "If you manifest something, it will come true." But, whenever I think too much about something, it never happens. What am I doing wrong?

You are not "manifesting" something. You are overthinking about something, not manifesting it. The saying is pretty obvious. If you create something, it is there.

I feel like I’m alive, but not living. I'm surrounded by complete unhappiness and feeling stuck. How can I get over this? I don’t even want to be around people anymore.

I made a promise to myself after my divorce. I wanted to be happy. I strived to be truly happy always, and in all things, regardless of my circumstances. It wasn’t hard, it was a choice. You don’t "need" to be around people to be happy, but it is easier to surround yourself with good friends. 

Why do people not think love is the best thing in this world?

They are not truly in love. If they were, they would think differently.

What can I do to be remembered?

To be “remembered” you must do something memorable. Or, you need to make good friends, who will remember you for what you were. They need to miss your presence around them. Maybe you are selfless or are always there when they need a friend. You need to be someone they will miss when you are not there.

What are the potential benefits of believing in the absence of God and an afterlife?

You will only have one life. Live it to the fullest.

How do I become very hungry to learn?

You have asked this question, and asking questions is the best way we learn. If you want to be “very hungry” to learn, find something you want to learn and pour your heart into it.

“The best thing for being sad," replied Merlin, beginning to puff and blow, "is to learn something. That's the only thing that never fails. You may grow old and trembling in your anatomies, you may lie awake at night listening to the disorder of your veins, you may miss your only love, you may see the world about you devastated by evil lunatics, or know your honour trampled in the sewers of baser minds. There is only one thing for it then — to learn. Learn why the world wags and what wags it. That is the only thing which the mind can never exhaust, never alienate, never be tortured by, never fear or distrust, and never dream of regretting. Learning is the only thing for you. Look what a lot of things there are to learn.”

-- T.H. White, "The Once and Future King"

What does a person feel after death?

When you die, you’ll know.

Where do we go if we die? Do we go to heaven?

It depends on your belief. I believe we continue to learn for many incarnations before we attain nirvana. But, this is my belief. I’m certain, there is some version of “heaven” waiting at the finish line. I don’t worry about it, though. It will be many more lives and more learning before I see it.

How do individuals who believe in destiny reconcile with the concept of free will?

Destiny is what you make of it. Your “free will” has much to say about what you do in forming your destiny.

If life is predetermined, what is the significance of our choices and actions?

Life is not predetermined. Everything we do affects our destiny. For “weak-minded” people, they can let our choices determine what they do. It is their choice to let us “predetermine” their destiny. When it comes down to it, everything we do is a choice we make, even if it seems others are doing it. What they miss is that others are being allowed by them to plan their destiny. It has to do with them exercising their free will.

How do I die without realization?

You won’t. 

Do we sleep forever after we die?

If you have religion, atheists will sleep forever. Theists will have many more lives to live and much more to learn. Of course, this could be totally wrong. It has to do with having hope in my faith.

“It is a curious thing, the death of a loved one. We all know that our time in this world is limited and that eventually all of us will end up underneath some sheet, never to wake up. And yet it is always a surprise when it happens to someone we know. It is like walking up the stairs to your bedroom in the dark, and thinking there is one more stair than there is. Your foot falls down, through the air, and there is a sickly moment of dark surprise as you try and readjust the way you thought of things.”

-- Lemony Snicket

What is a tip for a successful life?

Be always happy and you will always be “successful” in life. “Success” is being always happy.

Why do we live a permanent death?

I don’t know where you live, but I live in life. What you need to do, is to move from where you are, over to where everybody is enjoying their life. “Death” claims everybody, but we are reborn and live another life, and another, and another, and so on. Death is temporary… if you believe it to be so.

Do you believe that knowing too much can actually make your life hard to live?

No.

When was there nothing? What did nothing look like? At some point, something had to come from nothing. Matter has to exist for The Big Bang or The Big Crunch to happen.

This is complicated, but, I’ll try to make it simple. Nothing looks like… nothing, nada, zilch, zero. If you see something there, it isn’t “nothing”, it becomes something. If you really want to get down to basics, nothing is something. I mean... we named it “nothing” so it must be something... called nothing. Is this confusing?

Have you realized lately that you are living in your past assumptions and that nothing is ultimately real in your world?

Unfortunately, everything is real in my world. If you assume, it makes you look like you’re guessing. I never try to guess.

What are the beliefs that justify an unethical behavior?

A “belief” does not justify an unethical behavior. If you think it does, don’t do it. It is a choice, a part of your “free will.” As we age, we are supposed to try to be always good. Being "always good" is part of being ethical.

“Unethical behavior significantly increases the cost of doing business.”

-- Frank Sonnenberg

Is it possible for someone to believe in the existence of souls without believing in reincarnation?

Yes.

What do you do if you do not know what to do?

Twiddle your thumbs. When you get tired of that, something more creative will present itself.

Can I do whatever I want in life?

If it is legal and there is a market for it, yes.

What are your personal 10 commandments?

Live, learn, be spiritual, be truly happy always, be successful, obey societal laws, avoid drama, avoid hate, be myself, and avoid assholes. That’s pretty much it unless you think that looking at pretty women rates. I think that’s covered under the first commandment - Live.

Is it possible for people to be chosen for great things in life?

Most of the “great things in life” people are chosen for.

Why do we never incarnate? Is death the final end of life?

Death is the “final end of life” for those who don’t believe in life after death. For those who do believe, life may continue for many incarnations. There is no concrete proof either way, though. It is a matter of faith.

“You cannot put straight in others what is warped in yourself.”

-- Athanasius of Alexandria

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com