Questioning Lies, Lessons, Choices, Memory, Fate, and Inspiration

 

“If you tell the truth, you don't have to remember anything.”

-- Mark Twain

If everything you believe about yourself was a lie, who or what would be left in the emptiness?

You. If everything you believed about yourself was a lie, believe in the truth. The only person who knows the truth… would be you. If you can’t believe in your true yourself, then, all is lost.

If you could hold a single moment forever would it eventually become meaningless?

Not if the memory was a world-shaking orgasm. Just saying.

What is your dream mental health help-seeking experience? When you think "oh I want to learn/get some help on how to deal with a few things in my life", what do you do next?

My Dad said, “It is what it is.” He was right. He taught me to be my own advocate, take things that life delivers, and work hard to make the delivery work for me. Dad was a pain in the butt, but he was a smart man. At 71, I can look back at the jobs I retired from, and see the lessons he taught me. I never needed “professional” help to get through life. It is what it is.

What strategies can couples adopt to prevent the pressures of corporate life from spilling into and affecting the quality of their shared, blissful moments?

Don’t discuss work when you aren’t at work. “Off time” means you are off. Enjoy your off time until you get back to work. That’s the whole point of off time. You are supposed to be relaxing.

What was the cutest thing you saw today?

A small child in a stroller. It tickled me that the child wanted to get out and walk.

Two people have told me, “You’ve lived your life. So, try to make the most of what’s left.” I have found this quite hurtful. Do you think, at 60, your life is done?

You live your life to learn. Everything else is supporting this "prime directive." At 71 years of age, I am certainly not done learning. When I step into the cusp of the next great adventure, I will try to bring all I have learned with me. This is the point of learning all you can. You can make the most of the life you have left... by learning more than you know.

“Live as if you were to die tomorrow. Learn as if you were to live forever.”

-- Mahatma Gandhi

What are the important lessons you learned in life?

Learn, work, and love. Everything else is supportive. But, learning is the prime directive.

Why do some atheists feel the need to share their beliefs or lack of beliefs with others?

Because theists find the need to shame them for not believing in God. My personal opinion is that both parties need to shut up. If you have proof, lay it before us. The problem is that neither party has any incontrovertible proof to share.

How can you make sure you win?

If you tried, you have already won. Keep trying.

Is eternal peace actually doing the most you can do?

No. That’s called over-achieving, or doing more than you have to. “Eternal peace” is when you die. For me, peace will be for a short time… until I am reborn.

How can an organization balance long-term strategic goals with short-term financial pressures?

Strategically. If this is not possible, you are screwed.

Who keeps you inspired?

Albert Einstein inspires me. He said it wasn’t enough to learn. It was the ability to understand what you learned, that was more important. Wisdom for the ages, in my humble opinion.

“Any fool can know. The point is to understand.”

-- Albert Einstein

What are some examples of choices made under short-term thinking?

Buying a car beyond your expectations. Buying anything if you don’t know if your job is secure. If anyone says you need to jump on the “deal” and you do, this is “short-term thinking.” The deal will be there next time, or the salesman will give you the deal as a “one-time” late purchase. Never buy something because you think you need it. Buy what you need, not what you want.

How does long-term thinking change the way decisions are made?

Usually, long-term thinking is better because you have a moment to ensure everything is in place to support your thinking.

Years ago, I was able to take a lot of free stuff back home with me when "self-checkouts" started. But, because of so many people with big mouths bragging about it all the time, I can no longer do so. What are other ways I can get free stuff?

I assume you mean, of course, without stealing? Or, is this what the question is all about?

How do you get yourself to want something?

I don’t. If I want something, it is an emotion I deal with. If I can afford it, I buy it. If not, then I don’t. It’s pretty simple. Affording what you really want, is key to staying out of debt. I got into debt early on in life, and my mother paid my debt, and I never put myself in the same trick again.

How do I respond to the question: What inspires you?

Ask yourself, “What inspires me?” There is no judgment. It is what inspires you. 

Which success do you need in life?

I used to think success was tangible. But, I came to the conclusion what I really needed was true happiness. About 23 years ago, after my divorce, I decided to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of my circumstances. It was a choice I have not regretted.

"A mathematical formula for happiness: Reality divided by Expectations. There were two ways to be happy: Improve your reality, or lower your expectations."

-- Jodi Picoult

Do you remember what you did last month?

Indeed.

What do you have to do to be successful in life?

Define success. Being successful in business is way on the other end of being successful in life. “Success” is a term each person needs to define for themselves. Does it deal with life, or does it deal with business? You can be very successful in business and be miserable in life. I was miserable because I married the wrong woman. After 25 years, I divorced and became very happy again. I have not remarried since, and it has been 23 years. I am still a truly happy camper.

Do you realize once you lose interest in things, it makes you realize who you truly are?

I never get involved in things I will lose interest in. Maybe, at 71, I know who I am.

How do I make as much money as my father because I don't want his money?

If you make as much money as your father, it isn’t his money, it is yours. Even if you worked for him, the minute he pays you, the pay becomes your money, not his. You earned it.

Are we in paradise, and greed is trouble in paradise?

“Greed” is trouble whether you are in paradise or not.

How do you experience time?

I look at the clock. Time can take over a project I’m involved in. I would lose myself in a project and might see that I’ve missed lunch. Time is a human concept that pisses me off. When I was in the Air Force, I wanted to finish a project but the office was closing, so I had to stop. When I retired and got a civilian job, the vice president of the company had to put me on a salary, due to my work ethic.

"A man who dares to waste one hour of time has not discovered the value of life."

-- Charles Darwin

Do you believe that everything happening is a fate?

Yes. I can change my “fate” but, that change becomes my fate. It is what it is.

Why is life meant to go loveless after all you have been through?

Oh, to the contrary. I have been through a lot, and love has followed me. The minute I got my divorce, the women were lining up. Life has never been “loveless” for me.

I hurt my older sister, a lot, with my actions and I deeply regret it. I am afraid she will never want to see me again, what can I do? We used to get along very well, but I ruined things.

You are telling us the things you should be telling her.

When, in your life, did you start to understand that you cannot let the fear of a politician's words and threats ruin your quest for happiness?

I was always concerned with a politician’s rhetoric. My Dad taught me to judge on a politician’s record and not on their rhetoric. The only threats trying to ruin my happiness come from the Democrats. Thank God, we have a leader back in the White House.

Has anyone achieved complete enlightenment? Is it true that the definition of enlightenment varies among individuals?

No, and yes. Well, maybe. Buddha may have attained complete enlightenment, but it is a story passed down through the ages.

What distinguishes a person who believes life has no meaning from one who believes life has no purpose?

Ignorance. Life is about learning. Everything else is to support the prime directive - learning. So, if you understand life, it has meaning and a purpose. If you don’t understand that life is about learning, it has no meaning or purpose. On the contrary, the meaning and purpose are the same thing - learning.

“It is not that I'm so smart. But I stay with the questions much longer.”

-- Albert Einstein

Whom do you regard as the most prominent individual in contemporary society who makes a substantial, positive impact on the world? What specific contributions do they offer, and in what ways do their actions serve as an inspiration to you and others?

Donald Trump. Contributions? Four years of prosperity and security. Biden wiped it away.

Is life for an atheist like flipping a quarter? With no divine guidance, do they just make random decisions and observe what happens next? They are pure UCS-CS CR creatures?

Atheists and theists are all the same. They have faith in their beliefs. Yet, there is no proof to support either belief. The only proof is when we die. If atheists are right, there is nothing. If theists are right, there is life everlasting. Personally, I’m shooting for life everlasting. Negativity has never been my strong suit.

What do you think of the name Ethan Bennett?

Has a ring to it. 

Why can't I be satisfied with the ordinary?

Why should you? The “extraordinary” would seem to be a bit above the “ordinary” bar. I would go with that… if it were me.

Are there alternative ways of living besides striving for personal success?

Yes. Striving for true happiness. It is a “personal success” that many don’t recognize.

Do you ever hope that someone will change after they've betrayed your trust?

I can only hope my ex-wife has changed. She betrayed my trust and tried to pin it on me. She wanted to cheat on me, and her tact was to accuse me of doing the same. I put up with 25 years of this before I divorced her.

"Betraying someone once can be a mistake. Betraying someone twice is a choice."

-- Garima Soni

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion in an arena of mutual respect concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained in 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance, he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com