Questioning Success, Jobs, Loosing, and Bullies

 

“A people that values its privileges above its principles soon loses both.”

-- Dwight D. Eisenhower

Does being principled guarantee some level of success in people's lives?

“Success” is being truly happy in life. Everything else is attaining goals. Holding to good principles defines who you are to those around you. If you stand by good and moral principles, you will, in all probability, experience true happiness in your life. I have found this to be true in my own life.

How do you cope with being envied by jealous people? I find it rather amusing and pitiful.

Indeed.

 He is known for his famous quote, "One can't avoid for inevitable." Who is he?

It has been used forever, and for good reason. It is very true. Anything that is certain to happen, is unavoidable. The quote, for whoever stated it, simply stated the obvious.  

How can I overcome my fear and feel more at ease?

“Fear” is the mind keeping us safe from doing stupid things. People with no fear are, usually, the first to die. You can “overcome” fear by understanding it. Is it realistic? Is it keeping you safe? Should you listen to it? Understanding “fear” is one way to deal with it, not necessarily to “overcome” it. Personally, after 23 years in the Air Force, I have learned that jumping from a perfectly good plane… is idiotic. No skydiving for me. No free-climbing, no swimming in shark-infested waters, no alligator hunting, no snake collecting, no tarantula petting, etc., etc., etc. I am 70 years old and doing just fine without all the excitement of, to my mind, overcoming fear (e.g., stupidity). Just saying.

How do you deal with people who mock you?

They really do a bad job of it. Most people do. If they mock me for my fears, I wait for them to become a victim then I tell them there is a reason I let myself be mocked by idiots.

Is taking a risk good or bad?

It depends on if the risk is worth finding out. If it means jumping out of a perfectly good plane, then the risk is stupid. If the plane is going to crash in a historically large fireball, then skydiving might save my life.

“Happiness is a risk. If you’re not a little scared, then you’re not doing it right.”

-- Sarah Addison Allen

If you are asked about a successful person, who will you mention first?

The 14th Dalai Lama, known to the Tibetan people as Gyalwa Rinpoche. He strives to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of his circumstances. This is true success in life.

Do you have any talents or skills that you know you are exceptional at, but when you display them in front of others, you feel inept because no one acknowledges them?

Interrogation. Results trump any “acknowledgment” of exceptional skill.

How do I catch up when my friends have reached their desired degrees and independence, while I'm held back at home by strict family? Despite excelling academically, my family has stopped supporting my education.

It is your life. I can’t imagine a family that stops supporting higher education. Maybe it’s time to declare your independence and do what is best for your life. Friends can be a big help.

Does a proverb necessarily have to be wise to be timeless?

Well, wise and timeless do go hand in hand.

As a Team leader, should I try to keep a team member who loves change and challenges in the same position? He’s a valuable asset, he just craves novelty and change, so it will require energy to keep him interested.

These are the leaders of tomorrow. His attitude needs to be tempered, and the energy you need to be a "team leader" needs to be challenged.  Change and challenges can be a shot in the arm for an organization that has become tied to the old ways. Give him things that will require him to think before he acts. When he is wrong, you need to mentor him to learn to be right. He will, slowly, come around to the right way of doing things. When he is right, ask him why. In the future, you may even recommend him as your replacement.

Author's comment: This is what I would call "coaching." I like the idea that he may be a leader of tomorrow. Thanks for your answer. 

Can you make somebody who doesn't like you like you?

I’ve never met anyone, in person, who didn’t like me. The League of the Perpetually Offended doesn’t like me, but they never met me, and they don’t like anyone, even their own.  

“Don't be a fool. Don't give up something important to hold onto someone who can't even say they love you.”

-- Sarah Dessen

Why do most people do jobs that they are not passionate about?

It is a job. It puts food on the table, a roof over their head, and, if they’re paid enough, transportation.

How do you tell if your friend thinks you're wise?

If you really care, you missed the point.  

Why do you believe in the term "Self Admiration"?

Because, if you have just one person to believe in you, even if that person is yourself, you'll always find your way through life.

Why do people say "I'm not skinny but I'm not fat either"? What does this mean exactly?

They are tricking themselves into thinking they are perfect.

Have you ever had love at first sight?

Once or twice. What I think is “love at first sight” usually turns out to be “lust at first sight.” I learned, when I was in my 20s, to tell the two apart. It was a tough road, and I let many good women slip through my fingers from my ignorance.

Author's comment: Aw I wish you the best.

What are some quotes about being yourself in a relationship?

Try this:

“Sometimes you have to lose all you have to find out who you truly are.”

-- Roy T. Bennett

What are you afraid of loosing?

I’m afraid of “loosing” my belt. But, I think you meant “losing.” I’m afraid of losing my life. I have so much more to do before I cross over for the next great adventure.

Should faith be linked to financial success?

Faith is the wellspring of hope and should be linked to true happiness in life.

Why are you narrow-minded against comments if you seek knowledge?

Being narrow-minded is non-constructive. It certainly doesn’t help you to seek knowledge. Narrow-mindedness will only help you miss the clues that will help you to grow.

What makes decision-making easier and more confident?

Minimal options.

How does school really help you in real life? Or does it not?

Any schooling helps in life. Learning anything prepares you for something. If you’ve learned nothing, your options are very limited where making a better life is concerned.  

What are some powerful words/quotes/sayings that you think everyone should say every day? How would they change your life if you said them every day?

Any day on this side of the dirt is a good day to work on your issues, and any issues are yours. You have allowed them to become your issues. While you work on any issues, strive to be truly happy. It is a simple choice we make for our life, regardless of how crappy we’ve let our lives become. Being miserable is counter-productive to longevity. True happiness is a choice only you can make for your life.

“When you wake, thank God for the “gift” of another day in paradise.”

-- F.A. Villari 

“Strive to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of your circumstances.”

-- F.A. Villari

Are the popular kids the ones who perpetrate the bullying?

No. They think they’re popular, but being popular has nothing to do with making people afraid of you. The kids who perpetrate bullying are a sad lot that needs more loving and understanding than what they’ve gotten so far. If people would call them down for being the assholes they are, they might wake up to the reality of the situation.

Suppose a person from another religion accidentally blasphemes the god of another religion, what should that person do?

Some ignorance just can’t be helped. You can point out their blasphemy, and hope they understand, but the fact they blasphemed in the first place, probably shows their mindset.

What are your opinions of the quote below? "Ignorance(intentional) is bad, but protesting against it is worse."

So, leaving ignorance to its devices is okay? There are varying levels of protestation. Making education more available is a level of protestation. Protesting against ignorance is certainly not worse than letting ignorance go on its way. Ignorance is why we have the right to vote every four years, just to make sure the ignorant idiots we voted in before get replaced by better idiots.

How do you define personality in your own words?

“Personality” defines who we are. Our sense of humor, how we relate to others, our concern for those around us, and so much more, all help define our personality and who we are to those around us. I’m simply dripping in personality. To know me is to be concerned.

Can a person's job ever become obsolete? If so, how can this be prevented?

Yes, and you can’t. Change is the only true constant in the universe. Society moves forward and some jobs just become not needed. The best a person can do is stay on top of modernization and be ready to transition into whatever the new position requires. Computerization made many jobs obsolete… if you weren’t tech savvy, that is.

What is the most impactful short quote that has changed someone's way of thinking?

Try this:

“It is what it is until it isn’t, and, then, it is what it is, again.”

-- F.A. Villari

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch - it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either view any more right or wrong than the other. Opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form their own opinions, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint.

I fervently hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions, and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions offered. After twenty-three years of military intelligence, I believe that engaging each other in this manner, and in this arena, is a way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience... and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and senior manager. Following his service career, he spent 17 years working with the premier and world-renowned Western Institutional Review Board, helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research. He also served 8 years on the Board of Directors for the Angela J. Bowen Foundation.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As a weapon for his war on intolerance... he chose the pen. He wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's personal, spiritual path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony at: tolerantpastor@gmail.com