My Sunday Thought: Gay Christian, Gay Marriage - Part 2

When I wrote my latest post, My Sunday Thought for June 28, 2015: Gay Christian, Gay Marriage, I knew I was, once again, stepping into controversy rife with strong emotion.  When I posted it on the monastery's minister site, however, I had no idea it would cause the outpouring of comments it has, or the tension amongst the membership.  What surprised me more than the number of comments, though, has been the intolerance shown, not only to the subject, but also to each other and their opinions on it.

This topic also hit closer to home for me.  When family comments with a full paragraph vice the historic single sentence, you know you've struck a chord.  After publishing the post to Facebook, Annie and Sue had these comments:

"The question I haven't been able to find anyone answering is, why does it matter to YOU? My more religious friends post articles by other religious people talking about what the bible says and how they should act in regards to the new law, but not one person has explained how it will actually affect their lives. I understand all religions want the rest of the world to know God and follow their holy book so that we can all get into heaven, but isn't He the only one that is supposed to judge? 

I loved the last paragraph, about getting our own homes right before judging others. I'm not gay and have never questioned that, but I don't see why a person loving another person should matter to me. I know a gay woman who is married to another gay woman and you know what? Their marriage hasn't ruined my life or made my marriage any less meaningful, in the same way a straight woman married to a straight man has never ruined my life. 

Maybe they're wrong to some people; maybe they're right to others, but being able to read about gay couples who have been together for 50+ years finally able to get married makes my heart so happy for them and for the meaning of LOVE."

-- Annie

"I have been battling with my beliefs on this issue, feeling guilty at times for believing they should have the same rights as straight people. After all wasn't Jesus all about love and not hating anyone. I have very close friends who are gay or lesbian. While I have no desire to be gay, I respect their stand (but what about the Bible?) I just clicked on the Gay Christian Link you posted and spent the last hour watching Pastor Danny Cortez address his congregation on the subject. It's a wonderful explanation from a pastor's point of view. The end was very emotional."

-- Sue

For those folks interested in listening to Pastor Danny Cortez, please follow this link, Pastor Danny Cortez - Address, or Google Pastor Danny Cortez and learn more about his personal struggle with the church and his beliefs.

Annie and Sue address a few good points to ponder.  "My more religious friends post articles by other religious people talking about what the bible says and how they should act in regards to the new law, but not one person has explained how it will actually affect their lives."  Well, Annie's "more religious friends" probably can't explain how it will actually affect their lives because, and this is just an assumption, they can't even post their own feelings as they find need to post other's articles, and they're allowing themselves to be told how to act in regards to the new law.  Please do not drink the poisoned Kool Aid when they pass the tray, you will find God faster just thinking for yourselves and forming your own heartfelt opinions.  And I also think any couple, regardless of gender, that has been together for fifty-plus years has earned the right to tie the knot.  The number of hetero couples currently married will find themselves hard pressed to top that in today's societal norm of "love and leave" relationships.

Many of us are finding we are "feeling guilty at times for believing they should have the same rights as straight people."  Many folks of faith have been programmed throughout life to live by certain moral standards.  The problem with any standard is that change is the only constant in the universe.  Standards, like most everything else, are subject to change.  But let's take this part of Sue's statement and look at the obvious reason for the guilt, "...believing they should have the same rights..."  What seems to have not changed is our lack of tolerance.  

I'm reminded of Germany in the late 1930s:  Should the Jews be allowed to live in the ghettos of Poland?  Why should they be allowed to live at all?  What we need is a final solution to the Jewish problem.  Fast forward to current extreme attitudes like, the only good gay is a dead gay; Homosexuals are an affront to God; Gays are damned to hell for eternity; What we need is a final solution to the gay problem.  Some opinions, especially those selfish ones that seek to harm others or make ourselves seem superior, are just evil and never easy to tolerate or accept.  

Is it any wonder we feel guilt when our tolerance is in question?  Sue makes another good point for me, "I respect their stand."  The good thing about tolerance is that it doesn't demand acceptance.  Whatever the reason for people being gay, like an opinion or a choice, it is theirs.  Just because someone has a different opinion doesn't mean you have to accept it, but be tolerant of the fact it is their opinion and hope they respect your opinion as much.  

Sue also took the time to do some research and get an alternate viewpoint which may, for some, mitigate any feeling of guilt.  As with religious and spiritual faith, research is a way to find your inner truth, and this truth, as well all know, will set you free.  More importantly, this freedom may set you on your path to a higher glory. 

Editor's Note 

(re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card) 

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so.

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and then engaging in peaceful, constructive, discussion and debate in an arena of mutual respect concerning the opinions put forth. After over twenty years as a military intelligence analyst, planner, and briefer, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we do afterward, and what we learn from the experience.

Frank Anthony Villari (aka, Pastor Tony)

Pastor Tony is founder of the Congregation for Religious Tolerance and author/editor of the Congregation's official blog site, "The Path."