I Love You!

I love you.  No, I really do love you, each and every one of you.  But, wait a darn minute, you say, love is an "attraction based on sexual desire; an affection and tenderness felt by lovers."  Have I lost my mind?  Maybe I lost it somewhere back in the free love movement of the 1960s.  Then again, maybe it's just a matter of degree, or perhaps it is a matter of definition, then of degree.

Merriam-Webster's second definition of love is one of sexual desire, as stated above.  The first would be a "strong affection for another out of kinship or personal ties."  I think of all the definitions, number 4 could be used to sum them all up and allow us to file the other definitions behind it as a matter of degree: "Unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for the good of another, as (1): the fatherly concern of God for humankind (2): brotherly concern for others."  I'm certain the atheists must have already redefined this one to suit their non-belief in a deity.  I wonder how atheists rank on the Islamic terrorist POM (Perpetual Offense Meter).   I mean, you have to figure the Jews just flat piss them off, and they can claim Christians as historical enemies.  But, what would extremists do with atheists?  I think they would make the terrorist's little peanut heads explode, God bless them.

“Sometimes it’s a form of love just to talk to somebody that you have nothing in common with and still be fascinated by their presence.”

-- David Byrne, musician

So how do I make the fourth definition encompass attraction based on sexual desire?  Well... "My unselfish loyal and benevolent concern for your welfare seems to be heightened by how damned attractive I find you and this, in turn, seems to be expanding my concern for you through possible affection and tenderness.  What say you?"  Okay, this is the point where they either laugh or turn and walk away, but who would really say this?  Yes, yes, I probably would, but only because my sense of humor runs at a serious tilt.  It wouldn't be the worst "come on" I've ever heard or used, but I think it helps me make my point about how events and emotions can expand a definition without necessarily requiring another we create another definition.  It is simply a matter of degree.  It plays to the point of how deep and broad your love is; what your love is ready to encompass, at any given time.

If you think you're love is an attraction based on sexual desire, tenderness, and affection, should it not also meet the criteria of being unselfishly loyal and being benevolently concerned for this person's immediate and future welfare?  If not, wouldn't we be better to define this feeling as the lust that will soon culminate in a one-nighter?

"Love is the only force capable of transforming an enemy into a friend."

-- Martin Luther King, Jr.

I love you, even if I don't like you.  By definition, my liking you is not a requirement for loving you.   Heck, I don't even know you, so how can I determine if I like you.  Merriam-Webster lists affection, attachment, devotedness, devotion, fondness, and passion, as words synonymous with love.  It also lists abomination, hate, hatred, loathing and rancor, as antonymous to love.  Think about these.  So, if you don't love someone, you feel they are an abomination or do you hate them?  Are they loathsome to you?  Do you feel malice, resentment, or ill will toward them?  No?  Then maybe you need to come to grips with the very real possibility that it is possible to love everyone, by definition.  Or, you can feel free to choose an antonym.  It is really that easy.

"We've got this gift of love, but love is like a precious plant. You can't just accept it and leave it in the cupboard or just think it's going to get on by itself. You've got to keep watering it. You've got to really look after it and nurture it."

-- John Lennon (1940-1980), musician

Editor's Note 

(re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card) 

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so.

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and then engaging in peaceful, constructive, discussion and debate in an arena of mutual respect concerning the opinions put forth. After over twenty years as a military intelligence analyst, planner, and briefer, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we do afterward, and what we learn from the experience.

Frank Anthony Villari (aka, Pastor Tony)

Pastor Tony is founder of the Congregation for Religious Tolerance and author/editor of the Congregation's official blog site, "The Path."