Questioning Ethics, Rules, Ability, Phobias, and Terror

“True terror is to wake up one morning and discover that your high school class is running the country.”

-- Kurt Vonnegut

What percentage of people in the USA lack imagination?

Everyone has an imagination. The real question should be, what percentage of the population will act on that imagination, and try to bring what they imagine to fruition?

How do I find ambitious people and have a positive perspective in life in high school as a student, like people who actually take action on their goals instead of complaining and waiting?

Start a “Positivity Club” in the school.

What is it like to have no brother or sister?

You don’t have to share… anything. You also can’t shift the blame for anything. You can't declare you’re loved more, because you are it.

Sibling rivalry is between you and the cat or the dog. The winner of that rivalry was always in question. If there was a fear of mom and dad putting one of us down, we were always left hanging. If I told them that mom loved me best, I always made sure to close the door to my bedroom so they couldn’t get into mischief at my expense. The dog was the worst. The cats just waited for me to go to sleep. I closed my door at night.

What is the difference between legal business environment, business ethics, and international laws?

There should be no difference. International laws may differ to some point, but all should be concerned with good moral ethics.

Why does having more stuff and more adventures never seem like enough?

Greed. You will never be satisfied, and you will never be truly happy until you are. Choosing true happiness, regardless of your circumstances is probably going to be beyond your reach.

“Thanks to our artists, we pretend well, living under canopies of painted clouds and painted gods, in halls of marble floors across which the sung Masses paint hope in deep impatsi of echo. We make of the hollow world a fuller, messier, prettier place, but all our inventions can't create the one thing we require: to deserve any fond attention we might accidentally receive, to receive any fond attention we don't in the course of things deserve. We are never enough to ourselves because we can never be enough to another. Any one of us walks into any room and reminds its occupant that we are not the one they most want to see. We are never the one. We are never enough.”

-- Gregory Maguire

What kind of people should I avoid in life?

Unsupportive people. Mean people. “Fake” people, or people pretending to be something they are so very not. People who don’t have your best interests at heart. Oh, and members of the League of the Perpetually Offended. They aren’t good for anyone.

Is it stupid to tell someone they are allergic to something like a game, a teacher, or something random even though they obviously aren’t?

Yes, but, if they believe you, who is really stupid is a toss-up. 

Do most people follow the rules, or are most trying to game the system?

Most people follow the rules. Those that try to “game the system” usually aren’t that good at it and, even those that are, usually get caught sooner or later.

Do you agree that everyone deserves respect, no matter what they have done?

No. Everyone deserves respect until they don’t. It is a choice they make.

Which actually boosts one's confidence when one wants to deliver a speech to a large audience, "walking up to the stage while assuming every one of them likes you" or "walking up to the stage never minding if anyone likes you or not"?

It matters little. You are there to deliver information. They are there to hear the information you are there to give, therefore, you are in charge of your dissemination of the information. Be polite, professional, and knowledgeable, and ask if people in the back can hear you.

If they were told to attend, they will be getting very little from your speech, because they really don’t want to be there. The trick for any public speaker is to find the disinterested party in the audience. If you are any good at what you do, they will be riveted before you're done and they might be the only ones with a cogent question.

“Students of public speaking continually ask, "How can I overcome self-consciousness and the fear that paralyzes me before an audience?"

Did you ever notice in looking from a train window that some horses feed near the track and never even pause to look up at the thundering cars, while just ahead at the next railroad crossing a farmer's wife will be nervously trying to quiet her scared horse as the train goes by? How would you cure a horse that is afraid of cars—graze him in a back-woods lot where he would never see steam engines or automobiles, or drive or pasture him where he would frequently see the machines?

Apply horse-sense to ridding yourself of self-consciousness and fear: face an audience as frequently as you can, and you will soon stop shying. You can never attain freedom from stage-fright by reading a treatise. A book may give you excellent suggestions on how best to conduct yourself in the water, but sooner or later you must get wet, perhaps even strangle and be "half scared to death." There are a great many "wetless" bathing suits worn at the seashore, but no one ever learns to swim in them. To plunge is the only way.”

-- Dale Breckenridge Carnegie

How do you know the trustworthiness of a person from a job interview?

You don’t, not really. You can make an educated assumption, but it is still a 50/50 proposition. Trust is something that always has to be earned, whether in business or private life.

What is “ability”? Does it require free will?

It should, but you can be forced into learning an ability. An ability is simply something you can do. Any gulag or concentration camp can evidence people learning new abilities against their will. You learn or die sooner.

Which picture deserves upvotes?

That depends on the taste of the person upvoting. 

When you were a child, where was the special place where you could go and free your imagination?

We lived in Monterey, California. The beach and the rocky coast were a short bike ride. The sound of the gulls and the waves were soothing and would allow my mind to wander.

Have negative people disregarded your own opinions, beliefs, choices, and/or ways?

Oh, all the time. These are, usually, members of the League of the Perpetually Offended, and, no matter what I do or say, they will find some offense in it. I have found there is nothing to do but ignore them and pay attention to those who really look for help or mentoring.

“When someone tells me "no," it doesn't mean I can't do it, it simply means I can't do it with them.”

-- Karen E. Quinones Miller

Do people really think we are better or above all other animals because we simply have more intellect on average?

They haven’t come face to face with a large carnivore in an open space where they have nowhere to run. People are really that egotistically ignorant, and I’m being kind.

Do you agree that “there are no conspiracies but there are also no coincidences”?

As long as there is greed, there will be conspiracies. My belief in “coincidence” is situational, however. When you are in the Intelligence field, “coincidence” can take on a life of its own. It can also be nothing more than what it is - coincidence.

Why do I get a thrill-like adrenaline rush when I see people upset/sad?

You might need to seek help.

Does every person have some kind of phobia? Are there people without phobias?

I think so, but I haven’t met a person without one. If they say they don’t have one, I think they just haven’t had the experience… yet.

What are some of your views that you think are based on your own opinion instead of knowledge?

Opinions should be informed. My “uninformed” opinions, not based on knowledge, are more like assumptions. Assumptions are a guess, usually based on experience or bullshit. If I’m going to act per a view that is based on an assumption, I close my eyes, grit my teeth, and hope that everything works out and I don’t die, or destroy something or someone.

“You are not entitled to your opinion. You are entitled to your informed opinion. No one is entitled to be ignorant.”

-- Harlan Ellison

How do you see yourself related to others?

I don’t even try. If I compare myself to others, I’ll get a swollen head or I’ll feel like I need to step it up. Better I just accept myself for who I am, and others for who they are. In this way, I don’t have to judge others and open myself up to someone else’s judgment. All is right in my world.

Where did I go today?

Not a clue.

How do I deal with someone who constantly brings the past to start arguments? They bring their own twisted version of the story and shout in an intimidating way.

I divorced my version of this. You don’t deal with them, because there is something terribly wrong. The best you can hope for is to separate yourself from them. Put as much distance between you as you can, and then choose true happiness for yourself.

Why do you think some people inflict terror in the pursuit of superiority?

Yes. Adolf Hitler. Joseph Stalin. Pol Pot. And others, too numerous to name.

Is it wrong if you're still feeling optimistic about the future when people around you say that life is getting harder and harder day by day? And they mentioned that this is the cause of why people get mental issues.

They are the cause of people getting mental issues. If you listen to all the naysayers in the world you’ll follow them into their pit of misery until you can fashion one for yourself. Life is as hard as your make it. Some love the challenge, while others might get rid of baggage to make life a bit easier. The choice for your life is on you. Sit down and give up, or step up and move forward. It is really that easy.

 Whatever you choose, though, start by striving to be truly happy always and in all things, regardless of any other circumstances. If nothing else, this just pisses everyone else off. How great is that? 

“Never surrender your hopes and dreams to the fateful limitations others have placed on their own lives. The vision of your true destiny does not reside within the blinkered outlook of the naysayers and the doom prophets. Judge not by their words, but accept advice based on the evidence of actual results. Do not be surprised should you find a complete absence of anything mystical or miraculous in the manifested reality of those who are so eager to advise you. Friends and family who suffer the lack of abundance, joy, love, fulfillment, and prosperity in their own lives really have no business imposing their self-limiting beliefs on your reality experience.”

-- Anthon St. Maarten

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Race, Knowledge, Atheism, Secrets, and Learning

“A lifetime of eating at the foot of the Tree of Knowledge of Good and Evil had produced a vision of saints and sinners. My heart ached to embark on a journey of liberation and taste of the Tree of Life where saint and sinner are one in love. Every saint has a story, and all sinners have glorious pages yet to be written.”

-- R.J. Blizzard

What's worse: thinking a different race of people is inferior to your own but treating them well, or thinking a different race is equal but treating them badly?

Both are equally bad for obviously different reasons. I wouldn’t give you a pass for either of these.

How do you get someone to believe your point of view on an issue or topic?

You don’t. Whether they believe you or not is totally up to them. However, you can present your irrefutable evidence, and the facts, and if they aren’t swayed, a man with early onset Alzheimer's becomes the leader of the free world while the Speaker of the House tries her hand at operating a sockpuppet. This was evidence that, if you repeat bullshit long enough and loud enough, even freethinking people will believe it. We are that stupid.

How do you show respect to someone who is superior to you?

Salute. Hey! I’m pretty good at this!

How did humans figure out what to eat?

I’ll give it a shot in the dark, here. If it didn’t taste like animal feces, it probably had a chance. I say this knowing that some food really skirts the definition. If the contents of your stomach stayed where it was supposed to, you probably ate whatever it was again. I’m almost certain the nose came into play, somewhere along the line, as a “pre-taste” before it hit the second judge, the tongue. Personally, I'm really surprised we’ve gotten this far.

Why is it hard to be truthful?

If you’re always lying, it can be a tough fix. You become what you do.

“If knowing answers to life's questions is absolutely necessary to you, then forget the journey. You will never make it. For this is a journey of unknowables -- of unanswered questions, enigmas, incomprehensibles, and most of all, things unfair.”

-- Jeanne Guyon

What is it called when one person dominates a meeting?

Owner’s privilege.

How will religion destroy itself?

The perpetually offended will feed on themselves until the last person, because of some offense. This person will commit suicide because they are so offended that they were offended enough to kill everyone else. God will have to try again.

What exactly is knowledge?

Information.

Is it bad to be mean if it's for my own good?

It is in your best interest not to be mean. Sooner or later you’ll meet the person who will prove this to you. Thinking it is for your “own good” is simply making an excuse to be mean.

How and why do religions threaten people so often?

Organized religion is all about control, to some extent.

“If Jesus came back and saw what was being done in his name, he'd never stop throwing up.”

-- Woody Allen

What will humans look like in 1,000 years?

Have you seen the “greys” on UFOs? Probably us, in 1000 years.

Why does education encourage atheism? Is it a coincidence or freedom? Is education the source of freedom from superstition and lies?

The purpose of education is to teach, not to indoctrinate. Indoctrination is the purview of the socialist state, not a free-thinking society. Parents are currently revolting against socialist indoctrination in the United States school system where Critical Race Theory (racism) is being forced on their children. We have allowed socialism to infect our country, and it will be a long fight. Be careful what you vote for, as atheism isn't a stretch.

Is it normal for a psychologist to get mad at you?

No, and this would be a counterproductive therapy method, in my view.

Can atheists tolerate others believing in a god or gods as long as it causes no harm to others? Or do atheists think like evangelicals to persuade others to believe in no god/gods?

It is not my place to be offended by them. I expect the same in return. I expect it, but I don’t usually get it. The lack of mutual respect really doesn’t bother me, since this is what I’ve grown to expect.

I can wait.

Who said “Judy Judy Judy” in a movie?

Cary Grant.  Don't ask me what movie, though.  I'd have to look it up.

"Cary Grant was wonderful to work with on stage. He would move downstage, so that as he looked at me the audience had to look at me, too. He knew a lot about the theater and how to move around. He was very secure."

-- Fay Wray

Is keeping a secret a very good aspect of a human?

Yes, especially if keeping secrets is your profession.

Do atheists have a common misconception that all theists want to persuade them to believe in a god or gods?

I’m a theist and I really don’t give a rat’s ass what they believe. I simply wish they would return the favor. One group of us is going to be right, in the end, and will laugh, or not.

I'm not sure who I am. Once I decide who I am, I change. I used to be so loud and social, but now I'm the opposite. Is anyone else like this? Do you have a theory about why you change? I'm trying to figure out why my personality and identity keep changing so much.

We learn and we grow; we change. Nothing to worry about. Approaching 70 years of age, I still find myself changing, albeit not so much as I get older. I like the young ladies, now I like the old ladies. I still shoot a glance at the young ones, though.

I was loud and social, always trying to fit in. Then, I discovered myself and found a nitch. I fit in, so I changed and don’t try anymore. It is what it is until it isn’t, and then it is what it is again. You were you until you found you, now you are you again. Rejoice!

What are The least Important Things In Life?

Those things over which we have no control.

Does the pursuit of justice never have an end, a vicious cycle that perpetuates itself?

There will be no need for the pursuit of justice if there is no crime in society. Unfortunately, man is a greedy animal, and many have no self-control over their desire for more of anything. There will always be greed, there will always be emotion, and there will always be those who take it to the criminal level. It does perpetuate itself.

“In its pursuit of justice for a segment of society, in disregard of the consequences for society as a whole, what is called “social justice” might more accurately be called anti-social justice, since what consistently gets ignored or dismissed are precisely the costs to society.”

-- Thomas Sowell

Why is it so often presumed that criticism towards someone is based on jealousy (of wealth or power, etc.), rather than recognizing sometimes criticism is based on legitimate reasoning?

People follow the path of least resistance. Much easier to find fault than to reason through to the idea of a “legitimate” critique. Personally, I don’t give a shit what people presume, as they’re usually jealous.

Is it wrong to choose to be kind to who I want?

You should really be kind to everyone, but, who you choose to be kind to, is always your choice.

Are people the result of what we learn?

Yes, and we are always learning. Sometimes we learn that we are on the wrong path, so we change what we learn. But, the moment our brain sparks to life, we begin to learn our needs. When we are born, our senses kick in and the learning starts in earnest. We begin to desire and learn how to get what we want, not just what we need.

In order to finish something that was left incomplete, I am lacking the excitement to resolve it. What can I do?

Put it on a shelf, in plain sight, and walk away from it. The guilt I feel for not finishing it usually overcomes my lack of excitement and I force myself to resolve the situation.

Which psychological approach do you think is the best?

Gestalt psychology. I even appreciate the work in Gestalt “Therapy” by Fritz and Laura Perls.

“Man transcends himself only via his true nature, not through ambition and artificial goals.”

-- Frederick Salomon Perls

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Drive, Skill, Big, Feelings, and Failure

“About the body, I know very little, though I am steadily trying to improve myself, in the way animals improve themselves by licking.”

-- Renee Gladman

What differences drive a stubborn determination to fail, win, lead, or prevail?

In order to win, lead, or prevail, one needs to exercise perseverance. If you have a stubborn determination to fail, on the other hand, just do nothing. Failure will be along shortly.

What are some skills I need to be a great mad scientist?

An intellect that tips the scale, and no moral compass.

Is licking yourself a good way of practicing self-love?

Only if you’re really into physical gratification. Self-love has more to do with liking yourself, not licking yourself.

How can anger be managed if your anger is too strong for group therapy?

Pharmaceuticals.

To what extent should others be obligated to affirm an identity that I claim for myself?

Why do you think they should be “obligated” to do anything for you, much less affirm an identity you want to claim? You can ask them, and they have the freedom to decline if they so choose. The only person obligated to affirm anything in your life is you. You have to walk your own path, regardless of what others think of you. If you can’t do that, perhaps you’re on the wrong path.

“Better poverty without a care than wealth with its many obligations.”

-- Aesop

What skill do you have that is highly overrated at being hard?

Supervision and management.

What is a realistic perspective to have in order to maintain in such hard knocks, dog-eat-dog world?

True happiness. I strive to maintain my happiness always and in all things, regardless of my circumstances. Let the dogs eat the other dogs, it is what it is, as long as they stay out of my wheelhouse. If they decide to enter, I will be more than happy to throw them out.

Do you feel it’s necessary to volunteer?

No. Volunteering isn’t for everybody, and there are those who shouldn’t. It is a selfless decision some people can make to help others.

What is something that more than 90% of people do in the wrong way?

Make love.

What are the routine activities that a leader should have with his team, and how often?

A “situation” meeting at the beginning of the workday. A progress meeting at the end of each week. A bar-b-que at the end of each month, barring any “unsolved” situations.

“Successful leaders are truthful about what they do because they know they can never succeed if they take shortcuts by lying to their followers.”

-- Gift Gugu Mona

How do you cultivate a big picture perspective or learn how to think "big"?

Thinking big is learning to see the forest regardless of the trees. The problem with this perspective is the trees since they are a requisite part of the forest.

The “big picture” is our candidate winning the election for President. The problem with this perspective in the intelligence of the constituents. Do they realize the candidate is a flaming moron?

Is it true that no good deed goes unpunished - and no bad deed goes unpublished?

Only when it comes to the news media. Unfortunately, it seems to be their mantra.

Is it ethical or normal for therapists to agree to omit disclosures in their notes because they are seen by insurance companies or other service providers? It was a dark thought which could have negative implications for my disability funding/goals/life.

It could be seen as a violation of the federal HIPAA Privacy Rule (Health Insurance Portability and Accountability Act of 1996). Having worked for an Institutional Review Board for 17 years, I would ask you to review this stature and see if it answers your questions: https://www.hhs.gov/sites/default/files/privacysummary.pdf

What is the difference between the principle of good argument and the principle of critical thinking?

Critical thinking will provide the facts to use in a good argument.

To what extent can personality traits be changed?

Totally, if the person wants them changed. But, depending on the person, it is easier to change good into bad, than to change bad into good. It is easier to destroy beauty than to create it.

“One of the greatest regrets in life is being what others would want you to be, rather than being yourself.”

-- Shannon L. Alder

Why would someone throw everything they can think of at a cause they are fighting for when some of the things they are doing will make no difference to the cause?

They honestly don’t know what will make a difference, so they throw everything at it hoping something will stick.

What is the best way you have ever quit a job?

I only quit one job in my life, and that was with the Institutional Review Board I worked for. After being there for 17 years, they were bought out by a group that was going to take a meat ax to personnel. Not that I feared being fired, I just didn’t approve of their attitude or their lack of ethics, and since ethics was paramount for I.R.B.s, I chose to retire early and go to Mexico for a couple of years.

What books are recommended to learn more about human psychology (or any books that relate to human behavior in psychology) from beginner to advanced?

“Social Psychology and the Study of Deviant Behavior” -- Andrew John Pavolos

What is the difference between an employee-oriented and a task-oriented leadership style?

If the business is employee-oriented, the tasks take a back seat, and the business, sooner or later, will suffer. If it is task-oriented, the business will thrive at the cost of the employee, and, sooner or later, it will suffer. A good business model strikes a balance between the employee and the task. Teamwork, with concrete goals, is one way to accomplish this, and a good leader understands how it works.  Of course, I can be totally wrong.

Why should one make decisions based on facts and data rather than feelings?

Usually, unless the facts and data seem skewed, wrong, or simply out of date. Feelings are the last resort if a decision must be made. 

“If you obsess over whether you are making the right decision, you are basically assuming that the universe will reward you for one thing and punish you for another.

The universe has no fixed agenda. Once you make any decision, it works around that decision. There is no right or wrong, only a series of possibilities that shift with each thought, feeling, and action that you experience.

If this sounds too mystical, refer again to the body. Every significant vital sign- body temperature, heart rate, oxygen consumption, hormone level, brain activity, and so on- alters the moment you decide to do anything… decisions are signals telling your body, mind, and environment to move in a certain direction.”

-- Deepak Chopra

How can I avoid negativity?

Think. Take a moment to consider what you are thinking. Is it negative? How might you approach the issue with positivity - an open mind? To avoid anything you have to replace it with something. In this case, you replace it with positivity. If being negative is the only option, you had better be positive about your decision. 

Why does one fail to make a difference?

Enough is seen as enough. They stop banging away at the issues. One must persevere in the face of insurmountable odds, or they will never have a chance to attain their goal.

How could people struggle so hard? What reason could make them do so?

Perseverance. They refuse to quit in the face of insurmountable odds. It may be a life or death struggle, a matter of patriotism, or they might have strong faith that they will overcome the issue. Faith gives birth to hope, and, as long as you have hope, the struggle will continue.

Why does wickedness or evilness follow a person that is doing good to others?

Balance. Darkness always follows light. Without one we would not know the other. The truly good person, however, knows evil is there, and really doesn’t care.

Why is masculinity excluded from personality traits? The tendency to "take risks, compete and win" explains many of the holes in Hexaco and Big 5, so why not include it in the model?

Unfortunately for humanity, it violates the “all-inclusive” philosophy that awards “participation” trophies, instead of declaring a winner. It also prevents “men” from participating, and dominating, in women's sports, simply by declaring themselves “women,” since they can’t win anything worthwhile competing as men.

“Boys who spent their weekends making banana nut muffins did not, as a rule, excel in the art of hand-to-hand combat.”

-- David Sedaris

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Offending Opinions (Updated from the original 11/18/14 post)

One of my fellow ministers posted this little tidbit (above), and I was amazed at how many of us actually identify with it.  Maybe it has to do with learning that you're not responsible for everyone else's happiness, or that you really don't give a rat's patoot what other people think of you.

Opinions can, at times, be offensive.  Oh, hell, let's not sugar coat it.  For some of us, opinions are more times than not, offensive.  I offend the members of the League of the Perpetually Offended all the time, which is no surprise.  They are, after all, perpetually offended.

One of the blessings of a free society, and free will, is that you can ignore what you don't find acceptable, change the channel, find another article, and voice your own opinion regardless of what anyone else tells you contrarily.  We all have to remember, that it is not our fault some people are proud, lifetime members of the League of the Perpetually Offended.

In posting about religion, abortion, and the like, I have run into quite a few members of the League.  Being tolerant of other people's opinions does not mean having to agree with them.  Sometimes just being tolerant of the opinion is tough enough.  I constantly work on patience, my big failing.  It used to be that, if I didn't agree with your opinion, I would beat that rabbit to death, run it over with the lawn mower, set it on fire, and, "Damn the torpedos!  Four bells.  Captain Drayton, go ahead!  Jouett, full speed!" 

Not one of my shining attributes.  

Mother always said my mouth will get me into trouble.  I'm happy to report she was right, as always, and my mouth still does.  For most of us, religion, politics, free speech, and patriotism make a volatile combination due to the high emotion which runs through the subject matter for, just about, everybody.  I'm quite aware of the lines I should not cross. I also have to work on self-control.

I guess, for me, the bigger questions would be why we offend, and why we are offended.  I think, for the most part, we offend because we are offended, or we feel threatened.  It is a knee-jerk defense mechanism when all good sense on both sides of an argument seems to have gone south for the duration.  I would think this reaction might be excused if the comment was aimed at one who was dying or dealing with some other debility.  If you haven't walked a mile in their shoes... I think you get my point.  But, even where death is concerned, I would think that if you are at peace with the facts and are ready to move on, the possibility of being offended would seem small potatoes for you.

If I have not offended you, yet, grow a broad set of shoulders, a thicker skin, learn to let crap roll off your back and, rest assured, I will get to you soon whether I intend to or not.  However, try to remember it is all just opinion, and our ability to voice an opinion is one of the few freedoms we, as a society, have not let anyone take from us... yet.  So... exercise your freedom of opinion!  

Don't worry about people's opinions of you when you do exercise your freedom.   If we are concerned about what others think of us, we might never voice our opinions or have meaningful conversations.  We would all agree with each other.  How boring would that be?  The trick here is to put on your "big boy" pants, wade into the fray, and intend to take no prisoners.  At the end of the day, though, take everyone, even those that haven't agreed with you, out for beer and pizza.  Call each other names, slap each other around, make rude comments about each other's lineage, and then shake hands and share a big kiss.  It is all just opinion!  Try to learn not to take everything so damned personal.

"Everything we hear is an opinion, not a fact.

Everything we see is perspective, not the truth."

-- Marcus Aurelius

But, opinion is not necessarily based on fact.  In a free, democratic society we rely on news agencies and journalists to give us the information required to make informed and intelligent decisions.  When these "news" agencies stop reporting facts and begin reporting opinions, or worse, when they bow to political pressure to report only that which is politically correct, we are left with information of questionable validity.  In the political arena, it means the government has lost the trust of the people.  In religion, it becomes a war of intolerance against those of different faiths or no faith at all, and God becomes the big loser.

Whenever we hear news or intelligence reports, we need to have the facts; who, what, when, where, how, and why.  If any one of these is questionable we need to be advised of such, and if a perspective is given, in place of fact, this also needs to be told to us upfront.  Perspective should not be based on personal bias but, rather, on those facts which are known.  Quotes should not be taken out of context, either.  Presenting information out of context, whether it's jobs numbers, unemployment numbers, Holy Scripture, or personal philosophy, is technically lying by omission.

"There are lies, damned lies, and statistics."

--Mark Twain

News agencies have been mired down with personal opinion, not with perspective, and certainly not in factually reporting the news.  This is not a new problem.  When I was in military Intelligence, we fell back on the Christian Science Monitor so many times for factual reporting that it became part of our annual subscription list.  You could pretty much trust the CSM analysis to be more spot-on than government intelligence agencies.  I haven't read the CSM since I retired from the Intelligence field in 1994, but I hope they have continued the philosophy of reporting facts.  Other news media, instead of getting better, has, in general, become a complete disaster to the point that reporters are dictated which stories to run by management with their own agenda which has more to do with sensationalism, or embarrassing a government or President they don't approve of.  Your marching orders?  Print the facts and lose your job.

"The slickest way in the world to lie is to tell the right amount of truth at the right time - and then shut up."

-- Robert A. Heinlein

Reporting should follow a logical process of thought, so people know what to expect.  Report the facts, and report perspective based on the facts, before stating any opinion of the perspective.  This opinion of the perspective should be what leans your reporting left or right of center, but the facts should never be colored by opinion or it is not credible journalism or reporting of the news.  Reporting the facts allows the reader to make their own conclusion to agree or disagree with the reporter's analysis, perspective, or opinion.  Your "freedom of opinion" is what everyone fears.

Is it any wonder we have Houston pastors being ordered by the mayor to turn over all of their sermons, riots in Missouri over facts that are held back in favor of assumption, or a Catholic pope "of change" who people fear might become another puppet of the ultra-conservative Vatican?

If you question these opinions of mine, good for you!  Now, do your own due diligence.  Go online and read some foreign newspapers.  See what they're reporting overseas that we aren't hearing at home.  Check out their opinion of us as a country, our leaders, and our world credibility.  Check out how "peaceful" Islam is really slamming hardline and radical Islamic thought over the terrorism issue.  This reporting is something we never hear, and it makes one wonder why.  More importantly, it should make us wonder what else the news and, by extension, the government aren't reporting factually, if at all.

"Every time I write something, I think, this is the most offensive thing I will ever write.  But, no.  I always surprise myself."

-- Chuck Palahniuk

I make a sincere effort, at the bottom of every post, to inform my readers that this is all just my opinion.  In my opinion, it is my perspective based on information that can be of questionable validity, although I do take care to try and use factual data.  Opinions presented in this context are springboards for conversation and debate.  

Sometimes, the opinions can be offensive.  I would like to say the offense is not intended, but, more times than not, it is, and I apologize for that.  If I haven't mentioned you by name in my opinion, try not to take it personally.  It is intended as a cold slap to an unsuspecting face in order to elicit a response, a contrary opinion, to wake up the spiritually lazy and/or those in a self-imposed emotional coma.

Hopefully, you will continue to follow my blog posts. I hope you will comment, or at least develop an opinion of your own, pro or con.  Agreeing with me is not necessarily the right course, it is just my course.  I do not edit comments to my posts, as long as they are reasonable.  If I do,  I will explain what the change was so the comment is not taken out of context, or I unintentionally offend.  When I do offend, my intent is that there be no doubt.

"People misinterpret what I say all the time:  They think I'm being offensive, when really, I'm only being opinionated."

-- Taylor Momsen

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com

Questioning Goals, Truth, Life, Perfection, and Wealth

 

“If you look for perfection, you'll never be content.”

-- Leo Tolstoy

Is 23 old if I haven't achieved my goals?

You’ve already achieved some goals, you asked a cogent question. You’ll achieve more goals as you live life and get older. Stop worrying about how old you are and start achieving some more.

What do I do when I hate being a 'grower'?

Stop farming.

What would happen if cell phones suddenly disappeared?

People would be forced to exercise face-to-face, interpersonal, conversations. Oh, no! Really socialize? With no escape route, close at hand? The horror of it all…

Who said, “You cannot fail if you don't try”?

A brainiac who figured out you can’t have one without the other.

Do I deserve happiness or suicide?

Suicide is one-off, and then, oblivion forever. I’d go with sustainable happiness. You can deserve it, and enjoy it, and it repeats forever, if you don’t choose suicide, that is.

“There comes a time when you look into the mirror and you realize that what you see is all that you will ever be. And then you accept it. Or you kill yourself. Or you stop looking in mirrors.”

-- J. Michael Straczynski

How do I make my psychologist think I'm doing better?

Here's a thought: Do better. 

I think I'm a lesbian. But I'm also proud of myself for being a girl. And I love being a girl. Is that weird?

You can be a lesbian and be proud of being a girl. Nothing weird in that. Ask any guy. Now, stop thinking.

What's a truth no one talks about?

The boss and her secretary?

How do you get through life with guidance?

It’s like an instruction manual. You ask a question, and it gives you an answer. Sometimes the answers are in an obscure Chinese dialect, or the diagram was drawn with a dull pencil by a guy that can’t see, so you have to fall back and punt. Such is life, and you learn from it, you get through it. You learn to ignore instructions and rely on yourself. Ain’t life grand?

Is life hard or do we as people make it that way?

315 answers and, yes, we make it that way. 316 answers.

“Which one would you choose, the rock or the hard place?”

-- Meg Rossoff

Is it bad to be confident as a woman?

I certainly hope not. I love confident women. May I have another?

What happens when I am not perfect?

Nothing, because perfect does not exist. If you aren’t excellent, on the other hand, you have to try harder or quit. it is a choice.

What’s the most wholesome secret you have not ever shared?

You people keep trying. What part of "secret" escapes you?

When figuring out what you want in life, how much do the details matter?

Not much, until what you want starts to come to fruition, then it matters quite a bit. More important to work hard at planting the seed, than to divide your attention before it begins to blossom. The details start to matter a lot before harvest time. 

Should people be friends with a Pedophile?

Only if you’re a pedophile, and dream of abusive prison life.

“The rape of a child is a violent act of contempt, not an expression of sexuality or affection.”

-- Mike Lew

Is it rude to ask, “Do you know who I am?”

Not if you don’t mind an equally rude answer.

What would be the cause for someone to lose their temper & get frustrated over small things, saying terrible things, forgetting afterward what they said, yet still being aware of what they did. Could it be connected to a mental type illness?

It used to be called "Headupyourass Disorder" and was corrected with constant negative reinforcement. 

Reader comment:  Hysterical. This disorder is very similar to "Ahhf##ks Disease." 

My reply:  Indeed! Or, “Wratgas Syndrome" (Who really and truly gives a shit). 

What should I do if I want to be a good helper in our community?

Volunteer. Oh, and be good at it.

What can I do to stay motivated even when I'm not perfect?

Don’t worry about it, no one is perfect. If you can stay motivated while you’re excellent, that’s almost all that matters. If you can strive to be truly happy always and in all things regardless, however, you have life by the big brass ones. 

How do aspiring men, who try to live as authentically as possible, act?

Like fathers.

“A boy needs a father to show him how to be in the world. He needs to be given swagger, taught how to read a map so that he can recognize the roads that lead to life and the paths that lead to death, how to know what love requires, and where to find steel in the heart when life makes demands on us that are greater than we think we can endure.”

-- Ian Morgan Cron

Do you keep your inbox “clean”? What strategies work well for you?

The strategy is to never clean out your inbox. Work the issue and put it back in the inbox face down until it needs to go out. The bottom of the stack becomes your “outbox.” This way people think you always have work and don’t keep putting more work in your inbox.

Who is not tempted by power?

The truly humble. 

What do rich men want in a woman that other men don't?

They should want everything. They can afford it. The same holds true for very rich women, but it will cost them significantly less.

What is the motivation behind wanting power?

Greed. Anything you want is driven by the desire to have. That desire is driven by greed. 

Who first said “with great power”?

It was stated, first, in the "Sword of Damocles":

"According to the story, Damocles was pandering to his king, Dionysius, exclaiming that Dionysius was truly fortunate as a great man of power and authority without peer, surrounded by magnificence. In response, Dionysius offered to switch places with Damocles for one day so that Damocles could taste that very fortune firsthand. Damocles quickly and eagerly accepted the king's proposal. Damocles sat on the king's throne, surrounded by countless luxuries. There were beautifully embroidered rugs, fragrant perfumes and the most select of foods, piles of silver and gold, and the service of attendants unparalleled in their beauty, surrounding Damocles with riches and excess. But Dionysius, who had made many enemies during his reign, arranged that a sword should hang above the throne, held at the pommel only by a single hair of a horse's tail to evoke the sense of what it is like to be king: though having much fortune, always having to watch in fear and anxiety against dangers that might try to overtake him. Damocles finally begged the king that he be allowed to depart because he no longer wanted to be so fortunate, realizing that with great power comes great responsibility.

King Dionysius effectively conveyed the sense of constant fear in which a person with great power may live. Dionysius committed many cruelties in his rise to power, such that he could never go on to rule justly because that would make him vulnerable to his enemies. Cicero used this story as the last in a series of contrasting examples for reaching the conclusion in his fifth *Disputation*, in which the theme is that having virtue is sufficient for living a happy life."

-- Wikipedia, "Damocles"

Editor's Note

(Re: disclaimer cum "get out of jail free" card)

Before you go getting your panties in a bunch, it is essential to understand that this is just an opinion site and, as such, can be subjected to scrutiny by anyone with a differing opinion. It doesn't make either opinion any more right or wrong than the other. An opinion, presented in this context, is a way of inciting others to think and, hopefully, to form opinions of their own, if they haven't already done so. This is also why, occasionally, I will present an "opinion" just to stir an emotional pot. Where it may sound like I agree with the statements made, I'm more interested in getting others to consider an alternate viewpoint. 

It is my fervent hope that we keep open and active minds when reading opinions and while engaging in peaceful and constructive discussion, in an arena of mutual respect, concerning those opinions put forth. After over twenty years with military intelligence, I have come to believe engaging each other in this manner and in this arena is the way we will learn tolerance and respect for differing beliefs, cultures, and viewpoints.

We all fall from grace, some more often than others; it is part of being human. God's test for us is what we learn from the experience, and what we do afterward.

Pastor Tony spent 22 years with the United States Air Force Intelligence as a planner, analyst, briefer, instructor, and, finally, a senior manager. He spent 17 years, following his service career, working with the premier, world-renowned, Western Institutional Review Board helping to protect the rights of human subjects involved in pharmaceutical research.

Ordained 1n 2013 as an "interfaith" minister, he founded the Congregation for Religious Tolerance in response to intolerance shown by Christians toward peaceful Islam. As the weapon for his war on intolerance he chose the pen, and wages his "battle" in the guise of the Congregation's official online blog, The Path, of which he is both author and editor. "The Path" offers a vehicle for commentary and guidance concerning one's own personal, spiritual, path toward peace and the final destination for us all. He currently resides in Pass Christian, Mississippi, where he volunteered as the lead chaplain at a regional medical center.

Feel free to contact Pastor Tony:  tolerantpastor@gmail.com